Tribal Survival

[Dinh AaronMk]

>Porkchop, copulate with that horse.

[Eklispe]

>Name Un-named Women Women

[Brasslazer]

>Newly named woman named Women reminds me of my ex-wife, as my ex-wife was also a woman.
>Punish Women for reminding me of my ex-wife, via swarm of angry flies

[Mae]

UG THE FABULOUS is in his element GATHERING ORANGES. He wonders if PORKCHOP can see him from where he is.

WOMAN is TENDING the PLANTS rather BADLY, when she suddenly has the SHOCKING REALISATION that she is not just <CAVEWOMAN> but WOMAN. Every precious moment of her SHORT and MEANINGLESS LIFE flashes before her eyes as it all falls into place. Suddenly ALL FEELS RIGHT IN THE WORLD and her ears are filled with an ANNOYING BUZZING SOUND. Must be because of the SHOCKING REALISATION.

A SWARM OF FLIES comes in from the EAST. They will descend upon WOMAN in anger any minute.

THE ANNOYING BUZZING SOUND distracts WISEAU THE WISE from THINKING ABOUT ORANGES ALOT. She seems MILDLY CONCERNED.


PORKCHOP has never seen such an ENCHANTING CREATURE in his life. She has the most captivating EYELASHES.

PORKCHOP hates all form of SOCIAL INTERACTION; so there will be no CHIT-CHAT and he will not BUY HER DINNER. If the HORSE attempts to make any sort of CONVERSATION, he will go into a BLIND RAGE.

The question is does he knock out the HORSE and drag it back to the shack like a GENTLEMAN or stay in the PLAINS as free as a BUNNY?

WISEAU THE WISE gains 1 XP towards ??? [ORANGE APPLICATION].
UG THE FABULOUS gains 1 XP in FORAGING.
<UNNAMED CAVEWOMAN> gains 1 XP in FARMING.

Camp Information

Camp Information

It is LATE AFTERNOON. The temperature is WARM. The weather is SUNNY. <UNNAMED TRIBE> have set up their home in a NICE CLEARING. SOME PRIMITIVE FARMING is UNDERWAY. PORKCHOP is EXPLORING THE PLAINS. There is an ANGRY SWARM about to ATTACK WOMAN.

Inventory:
PORKCHOP: 1 Angry Spear Thing

1 Mysterious Glowing Bean
5 Giant Oranges (10 Potions)
4 Sticks
4 Flint
1 Pebble with a hole in

1 Orange Tree (Planted)
1 Unknown Fruit Tree (Planted)
2 Potato Seeds (Planted)
2 Shacks [4/4 Population]
Unlit Camp Fire

Player Points

KnightShade: 8
Dinh AaronMk: 2
DeadBeatWalking: 2
Eklispe: 1
Brasslazer: 1

[KnightShade]

>Wiseau, fashion a knife

[RedDusk]

>Woman, the lord of flies have chosen you. Worship like the lowly scum you are.

[Little Bill]

>Attempt HORSE taming

[Mae]

NO, this creature cannot be WOOED. PORKCHOP decides it's better to keep the HORSE as his TRUSTY STEED FOREVER.

PORKCHOP feels RESOLVED and STOMPS over to the HORSE HEROICALLY. He SPOOKS all the BUNNIES and they dissapear into their WARRENS.

PORKCHOP has never attempted to TAME any animal before. He decides to WAVE HIS SPEAR WILDLY AT IT in a sign of FRIENDSHIP.

THE HORSE goes WILD and KICKS PORKCHOP in the STOMACH before RUNNING OFF to the EAST.

PORKCHOP has aquired a LIGHT WOUND. He is VERY BRUISED but it could of been alot worse.


WISEAU takes a STICK and breaks it in HALF. she uses a FLINT and some HAIR to bind it. She now has a KNIFE.

WOMAN realises there's an ANGRY SWARM of FLIES above her. It is CLEARLY A SIGN. She feels COMPELLED to FALL TO HER KNEES in WORSHIP of such a DIVINE MIRACLE.

The ANGRY SWARM BUZZES above her enjoying being WORSHIPPED.

PORKCHOP gains +1XP to SNEAK.
PORKCHOP gains +1XP to TAMING.
WISEAU THE WISE gains 1 XP towards CRAFTING.
WOMAN gains 1 XP in RELIGION.

Camp Information

Camp Information

It is LATE AFTERNOON. The temperature is COOL. The weather is SUNNY. <UNNAMED TRIBE> have set up their home in a NICE CLEARING. SOME PRIMITIVE FARMING is UNDERWAY. PORKCHOP is EXPLORING THE PLAINS. There is an ANGRY SWARM about to ATTACK WOMAN.

Inventory:
PORKCHOP: 1 Angry Spear Thing
WISEAU THE WISE: 1 KNIFE
1 Mysterious Glowing Bean
5 Giant Oranges (10 Potions)
3 1/2 Sticks
3 Flint
1 Pebble with a hole in

1 Orange Tree (Planted)
1 Unknown Fruit Tree (Planted)
2 Potato Seeds (Planted)
2 Shacks [4/4 Population]
Unlit Camp Fire

Player Points

KnightShade: 9
Dinh AaronMk: 2
DeadBeatWalking: 3
Eklispe: 1
RedDusk: 1
Brasslazer: 1

[Little Bill]

>Go to whatever secrets this horse is leading you to
>Have Ug do a rain dance

[Chapatrap]

>Unnamed cavewoman gathers some firewood because it's coming close to night. The firewood is not phallic in anyway.

[RedDusk]

>WISE ONE, practice the ancient art of violent stabbing on those oranges.

[Brasslazer]

>Woman should be rewarded for her worship of the flies
>Make Woman attempt to tame the flies in a non-sacrilegious way to help her with her tasks

[KnightShade]

>Wiseau, attack the flies

[Mae]

PORKCHOP follows the BEAUTIFUL CREATURES on a MAGICAL ADVENTURE. It will take him longer to TRAVEL as he is INJURED.
IT IS EVENING.

PORKCHOP arrives in the TEMPERATE PLAINS. A SMALL HERD of HORSES have GATHERED here. A selection of FOXCLOWNS WATCH from AFAR.



UG THE FABULOUS does a RAINDANCE. he has no UNDERSTANDING of ELEMENTAL MAGIC but that doesn't stop him. PERHAPS if he was EXTRA FABULOUS the GODS would look FAVORABLY upon him, but he's too busy thinking about PORKCHOP and ORANGES.

WOMAN gathers some FIREWOOD by the TREELINE. What she finds is MEAGER and won't sustain the NIGHT. There might be BETTER WOOD in the FOREST. Or perhaps she could craft some kind of TOOL to help her.

WOMAN is too busy CONTEMPLATING FIREWOOD to take another ACTION right now.

WISAEU THE WISE ONE, in her WISDOM, decides the best course of action is to VIOLENTLY STAB THE ORANGES instead of ATTACKING THE FLIES. She destroys 2 ORANGES in the process.

The FLIES see the DELICIOUS ORANGE PULP and DESCEND on it IMMEDIATELY.

YOUR OFFERING HAS BEEN ACCEPTED.

PORKCHOP gains +1XP to EXPLORATION.
UG THE FABULOUS gains +1XP to FABULOUS.
UG THE FABULOUS gains +1XP towards ???? (something to do with RAIN DANCING.)
UG THE FABULOUS gains +1XP towards ???? (something to do with RAIN DANCING.)
Ug the FABULOUS gains +1XP to DANCING.
WOMAN gains 1 XP in FORAGING.
WISEAU THE WISE gains 1 XP towards KNIVES.
WISEAU THE WISE gains 1 XP towards STABBING.
WISEAU THE WISE gains 2 XP towards ??? [ORANGE APPLICATION].
PORKCHOP, UG THE FABULOUS, WOMAN and WISEAU THE WISE ONE are HUNGRY.

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REMINDER

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Each character can do 1 Action per turn/time cycle. You can spend points to gain new characters. Current Point list:

KnightShade: 10
Dinh AaronMk: 2
DeadBeatWalking: 4
Eklispe: 1
RedDusk: 2
Brasslazer: 2
Chapatrap: 1

Potential Point Actions Currently:
3 Points = Spawn random reagent/component/material.
5 Points = use breed action between characters.
5 Points = Force a child to grow up prematurely.
5 Points = Cure a Light Wound.
10 Points = Spawn a new human PC. (see form below)
10 Points = Turn a Moderate Wound into a Light Wound.

You may request new point rewards if nothing takes your liking. I reserve the right to deny or change the price of rewards.

Camp Information

Camp Information

It is EARLY EVENING. The temperature is COOLING. <UNNAMED TRIBE> have set up their home in a NICE CLEARING. SOME PRIMITIVE FARMING is UNDERWAY. PORKCHOP is EXPLORING THE TEMPERATE PLAINS. There is an ANGRY SWARM DEVOURING ORANGES in the CAMP. EVERYONE is HUNGRY.

Inventory:
PORKCHOP: 1 Angry Spear Thing
WISEAU THE WISE: 1 Knife
1 Mysterious Glowing Bean
3 Giant Oranges (6 Potions)
4 Giant Orange Peels & Rind
2 Pips
3 1/2 Sticks
2 FIREWOOD
3 Flint
1 Pebble with a hole in

1 Orange Tree (Planted)
1 Unknown Fruit Tree (Planted)
2 Potato Seeds (Planted)
2 Shacks [4/4 Population]
Unlit Camp Fire

Player Points

KnightShade: 10
Dinh AaronMk: 2
DeadBeatWalking: 4
Eklispe: 1
RedDusk: 2
Brasslazer: 2
Chapatrap: 1

[RedDusk]

>WISE ONE: The lord is pleased. Dress yourself in orange peel and bathe in their juice in order to accept his blessings to take your place as his priestess. May the swarm be with you.

[KnightShade]

>Ug, eat an orange/the orange pulp

[Mae]

WISEAU THE WISE ONE somehow manages to construct WEARABLE CLOTHES out of the remaining ORANGE PEELS. She drenches herself in ORANGE JUICE.

WISEAU THE WISE ONE has realised that ORANGE RINDS could be placed on CROPS to help them GROW.
WISEAU THE WISE ONE has discovered FERTILISER for <UNNAMED CLAN>

Once the SWARM has finished DEVOURING THE PEELS on the FLOOR, they decide to EAT WISEAU as she smells DELICIOUS.

WISEAU is being ATTACKED by a HUNGRY SWARM.

UG THE FABULOUS eats HALF a DELICIOUS ORANGE. He is no longer HUNGRY.


PORKCHOP twiddles his THUMBS.

WISEAU THE WISE gains 2 XP towards TAILORING, because MAKING CLOTHES out of PRODUCE is HARD.

Camp Information

Camp Information

It is EARLY EVENING. The temperature is COOLING. <UNNAMED TRIBE> have set up their home in a NICE CLEARING. SOME PRIMITIVE FARMING is UNDERWAY. PORKCHOP is EXPLORING THE TEMPERATE PLAINS. There is a SWARM DEVOURING ORANGES ON WISEAU in the CAMP. PORKCHOP, WISEAU THE WISE ONE AND WOMAN are HUNGRY.

Inventory:
PORKCHOP: 1 Angry Spear Thing
WISEAU THE WISE: 1 Knife
1 Set of Clothes: Crudely made fur coat & top (previous owner: Wiseau)
1 Mysterious Glowing Bean
2 1/2 Giant Oranges (5 Potions)
2 Giant Orange Peel & Rind
2 Pips
3 1/2 Sticks
2 Firewood
3 Flint
1 Pebble with a hole in

1 Orange Tree (Planted)
1 Unknown Fruit Tree (Planted)
2 Potato Seeds (Planted)
2 Shacks [4/4 Population]
Unlit Camp Fire

Player Points

KnightShade: 11
Dinh AaronMk: 2
DeadBeatWalking: 4
Eklispe: 1
RedDusk: 3
Brasslazer: 2
Chapatrap: 1

[KnightShade]

>Woman, eat an orange

[Brasslazer]

>Porkchop, look at the nightmare clown creatures behind you

[Dinh AaronMk]

>Porkchop, attempt to COPULATE with one of the horses again.