Agent looked at the damaged Reaper. She didn't expect him to be so healthy considering what he went through. At his offer, she took the seat beside his bed. "I didn't expect you to keep calling me Agent," the woman said with a smile, "It's Ally Estrada." Her smiled faded a bit as she cleared her throat, "I think you know why I'm here- you'd be a great addition to the Protectors of Treaft."
The mention of her name stirred something in Reaper. He nodded in acknowledgment as he thought
'Estrada... I'm sure it's just a coincidence'"Listen Ally, I'm grateful for your help, but don't take my thanks as a sign that anything's changed. I still believe that all you guys are gonna end up dead eventually. It's all this kind of life leads to, you can do all the good in the world, but the bad overwhelms everyone in the end. So no, I won't join you."
Ally sat back a bit in the chair to think about his words. She then leaned forward, propping her head up on her fists, pressing her elbows into her thighs. "Aren't you going to end up dead eventually too? You're doing good just like we are, and it looks like the bad did a number to you. With a team it'll be easier and you'll be able to do more good. I mean, isn't that what a hero is? Someone who sacrifices themselves- their freedom, happiness, lives- to help others and do good?"
"Oh I ain't no hero. I've been dead for a long time... goin' on 12 years actually" He paused for a moment, stricken by how, in the right light, Ally looked just like Sarah did, all those years ago.
"Until whatever's on the other side gets the memo, I'm just takin' as much of the scum along for the ride with me as I can"
"Look, you might not be killing with the team, but you can kill all you want on your own," Ally said, trying to understand Logan as much as she could. "Not only that, but what's going to happen if you end up going up against another one of those brutes? The team was there to stop it because we saw it on the news, not because you contacted us. If anything being on a team would be an advantage, you'll be able to fight bigger and badder villains, even if they aren't going to die." For a second, she thought about her own hero morality. It was a question she pondered often, should she be killing like other heroes? "I-I just don't think as a team we should be killing," the young woman said, not too confident in her words.
"I go up against someone like that again, I guess that's the end of the line. If not, the war goes on until something stops me"
He shut up for a moment. She wasn't going to understand. None of them could. How could they? They'd never been to war, never saw the things he did. But it's not like he could tell them... could he?
"Killing is the only thing that stops them, the system is broken. You beat on a guy, the cops take him away, he gets 3 square meals and a bed for however long it last, then he comes out, gets into the shit, and you do it again, and again, and again. Circle of life for those maggots. That same guy runs into a guy like me, the cycle ends. Word of advice, if you're not willing to kill, get out of this life. Because they are. Every single one you go up against will do it in a heartbeat to get what they want- even if all they want is 3 square and a cot"
Ally nodded her head. She could agree that many times jail was no punishment. "Is it our right to choose when someone lives or dies?" she asked him. They were human just like the humans they were killing, right? "Even if these people are bad, they still have families," she said and quickly added, "but I'm not excusing murderers or rapists. I don't personally kill them, but I don't feel bad when I hear they died. But the thieves and dealers don't need to be killed. Those people are the scum who can rot in jail."
"You're bein' pretty generous, thinking there's any good at all in the filth I put down. I think they turned over their right to be human when they started doing the things they did. That goes for all of them, even the dealers and thieves. You start making exceptions for one, you lose the point of it. The people I kill need killing, that's all there is to it"
She couldn't understand why Logan was so intent on killing others. "Does it give you a rush to kill someone?" she asked. Maybe that was why he killed so much, more for the thrill than the actual action.
Reaper stopped to ponder her words, really think on them. Did he enjoy doing this? Did he feel anything anymore when he pulled the trigger?
"No, it doesn't" he said "At first, yeah, when it was someone I knew deserved it. I took pride in knowing that piece of shit would never touch another kid, lay hands on a woman, or take an innocent life again. But they never suffered, they still don't. If I have intents on killing someone, I just get it over with. It's the way they teach you to do it."
Ally believed that everyone, or at least most people, had good in them, it was just a matter of bringing it out. At this point though, she wasn't going to win the argument, so she let it go. "The way they teach you to do it? Who taught you?" she asked, quickly adding, "If you don't mind telling me, that is."
"No I don't mind" Reaper replied, taking a sip of water from the glass on his bedside table. He gestured towards the jug and the spare glass, offering some to Ally. He produced a flask from his shirt pocket, mixing some whiskey into the water and stirring it with a finger as he began to speak.
"The military" he answered "I was a Marine, 3 years. First day of training, drill sergeant got us to gather round and he said "Forget everything you thought you knew from the movies. It ain't like that. You get into combat, take the shot if you have to, but don't make 'em beg for death. If you're lucky, you never pull the trigger" I think you can guess that I wasn't very lucky"
"Oh, I'm sorry you went through that," Ally said sullenly. She knew her father served, but he never told her specifically what and she learned to never ask. Ally declined the water with a slight head shake. Since Logan was opening up, she figured it would be a good time to ask, "When you were passing out after the fight the other day, you called out 'Sarah'. Was that woman captured or hurt during the fight?"
"I did?" he asked "Truth be told, I thought that was just in my head.... didn't think I'd ever talk about this, but maybe if I tell you everything, you'll understand. Sarah wasn't a soldier, she was my wife. First year of university, Introduction to Law, hell it's over 20 years ago now, I still remember it so clear. First time I saw her, I thought I'd died and she was the angel come to take my soul on to the other side. She was so beautiful. After a couple weeks I finally spoke to her, lucky for me we hit it off" he chuckled at that, so lost in the memory that he didn't even notice the tear starting to form in his eye.
"It was about a year later when the war broke out, and I had to go over there. Had a 2 year deployment, and every damn night I was there just wished I could be home with her, that's what kept me fighting. I kept a picture of the two of us on me at all times, it was the last thing I saw every night before I went to sleep. Then before I knew it, I was home. Wasn't 3 seconds after I set eyes on her that I dropped to a knee and asked her to marry me"
He broke off, refilled his glass and drank a bit more, still unaware of the profound sadness on his numbed face
Ally's heart slowly began to deflate as she listened to Logan speak. Stories like this usually didn't have a happy ending, especially when you told them with a face as sad as Logan's. She didn't exactly pity him, more that she sympathized for him. As he filled another drink, the woman decided to take a chance and put a comforting hand on top of his. This wasn't about him joining the team anymore. They were two humans, one of which faced with an extreme pain she could never understand.
Logan felt a hand on his, and nodded at Ally before continuing.
"The question came up about how we were gonna pay for the wedding. She didn't come from a well off family, and me, well, we lost my mother when I was young, my father had to try and run an auto-body shop while raising me himself. He wanted to help out as much as he could, but even with that, we couldn't pay for the kind of wedding she deserved. One night she comes home in tears. She's bawling so hard that she can hardly breathe. I grabbed onto her, pulled her close and tried to get her to speak, I thought something had happened on her way home. Eventually, she managed to find her voice "Baby" she said "Baby, I'm pregnant." Now suddenly I'm bawlin' my eyes out, it was the most amazing thing to ever happen, we were so happy, but babies are expensive, even more so than a wedding."
A tear rolled down his face as he finished the drink, went to pour another one.
"I ended up re-enlisting for another tour, with permission to leave for the birth. Some kind of re-enlistment package deal, higher pay for harder work, so I took it. Just before I left, Sarah sprung a surprise on me. She spent some of the money we had laid aside for the wedding, rented that little chapel up on Norfolk, invited in friends, and we had the wedding then and there. It was a beautiful day. Back overseas, I ended up leading a squad during Operation Valley. Don't know what kinda history background you have, but basically, it was the bloodiest battle in the war, also one of the last. Platoon leader went down, we lost a lot of commanding officers, next thing I know, I'm in charge of 200 men. Less than 10 got back from that mission. I lost track of how many men I killed just to stay alive, because I had a reason to get home. Anyway, at the end of it all, they stuck some medals on my chest, called me Captain and sent me home. Got a call from my father the morning I was bein' flown out, told me Sarah was goin' into labor. Soon as I got home, I raced for the hospital, and as soon as I walked in that door, I saw her, Sarah holdin' my daughter. We named her Emily."
"Sarah had finished school by then, she was workin' as a legal aide, hopin' to go back and get her law degree. And me, I tried to pick up where I left off. Went to night classes for a bit, but that didn't last. Worked at dad's shop for a bit, but mostly I just looked after Emmy. God, even as a baby, she could move, watchin' her was a full time job.... My jacket's on the door, there's a few pictures in the inside pocket, if you want to have a look"
Ally squeezed Logan's hand lightly as a year rolled down his eye. It was always hard to watch a man cry, even if it was only a couple tears. As he continued his story, things seemed to get better, then worse, then better, but his rollercoaster was inevitably ended for the worse, anyone could tell. At the invitation to look at the pictures, she nodded and moved over to his jacket.
The first picture had to be the one from his stories. A much younger Logan stood beside a strikingly beautiful woman who must've been Sarah. Her hair was a light brown, almost indistinguishable from blonde. Her light hair contrasted well with Logan's darker. Their eyes were lit with what looked like the hope of tomorrow and their features were softened by the love for each other. It was no wonder Logan looked at this picture every night. The second was of his little girl, Emily. It was cute to see her darker brown hair inherited from her father. The girl would grow up to look mostly like her mother, Ally had no doubt of that. She seemed happier than most girls and made direct eye contact with the camera, making it feel like she was making eye contact with the viewer. "They're both very beautiful."
"I think Sarah took most of the credit for Emmy" Reaper said with a smile "Something as beautiful as that doesn't come from a guy like me"
"I realized I had to get back to work, Sarah wanted to finish law school and we wanted to start saving for Emily. I didn't have much luck with it at first. Finally, one day I get a call from of the men I served with, said he was working for the agency and wanted to know if I was interested in joining a classified project- the Grim Protocol. He saw first-hand how lethal I was in combat, wanted me to put those skills to use again. Basically, my job was to eliminate persons of interest. Paid a small fortune and I was never away from home long, so I was able to watch her grow up. Five years I did that, over 40 missions for 'em, then I asked to leave. All the death was startin' to catch up to me, I knew it, Sarah knew it, even Em was startin' to notice the difference in me. My handler took it well, same man I served with, he said "If you say you can't do it, then you really can't. Say you can do it and everything will work out." I figured I'd fired my last bullet when I got home that night."
"Emily was 7 or so by now. The sweetest thing ever put on this world if you ask me, but she knew some dirty tricks on gettin' her own way. She wanted to see a movie one night, but it was only playing at this theater across town, by the time it was over it was past her bedtime on a school night. Never could say no to her."
Reaper looked down at the glass, swirling its contents around before taking another sip.
"Sarah didn't like it, how easy I gave in to her, but before too long all three of us were going. I spent half the movie just lookin' down at Em beside me, she was havin' the time of her life. Sarah on the other side of her, laughing along as the joke's played out on the screen. Little did I know we'd walk out of that theater and into a nightmare. There was an ice cream place nearby, we walked over there for some, got pulled into an alley half-way there, three men, two knives and a revolver "Give us your shit" they said, junkies, probably, stealing enough to afford their next fix. I still carried a pistol everywhere, force of habit, so I drew it, tried to scare 'em off. Didn't see the other guys at the end of the alleyway, local scumbags. They must've thought I was from another crew, opened fire. I shot back, yelled "Get down" to the girls and prayed they'd be safe when it was over...."
His voice broke, he inhaled deeply to calm down, through some newly formed tears he whispered.
"Sarah took one to the head, dead instantly. Emily was lyin' there, clutching at her stomach, screeching in pain, crying for me and her mom. Blood was spillin' out of her Ally, I couldn't stop it, the sirens were gettin' close, but it didn't matter. I held her close, covered in her blood, my face splattered with the blood of men who didn't have to die that night. I could hear her tryin' to breathe, tryin' to speak "Daddy please. Please" I told her everything was gonna be ok if she stayed strong, she just had to hang in there, daddy was gonna fix it, make the pain go away. It was the only time I ever lied to her. By the time the cops showed up, I was holdin' her lifeless body in my arms, her eyes were wide open and perfectly still. And I was a goddamn wreck, took four men to get her away from me, another three to get me to my feet and drag me to a car."
"After a few hours, I managed to explain what had happened, went through the process or whatever. Turns out one of the shooters had gotten away, they caught him a day or so later.... and the fucking piece of shit walked free. Not for long though, after everything was done, funerals and shit, I tracked him down, grabbed him right off the street. I brought him to a warehouse in the old part of the city, where we wouldn't be disturbed, I tied him to a wall, and threw everything I was ever taught out the window. I did unspeakable things to that man, made him suffer in ways you could never imagine. He'd potentially fired the bullet that killed my wife, or caused my little girl to suffer, that was fair wasn't it? They took everything from me, I had to take something back! That night, somethin' woke up in me, a revelation I guess. The world is broken and corrupt. It needs men like me to make the hard calls, it's the only way to clean up the shit that flows through the streets."
Ally sat back in the chair, running her fingers through her hair. It was tough to hear the end of the story and she could only imagine how Logan could feel. Everything clicked together now, why he wanted every criminal dead rather than living in cells. "I'm sorry Logan, I truly am," the words she said weren't empty, but she was sure he had heard them a million times before. What else could she say? "I know this was a long time ago, but if there's anything I could do for you please let me know."
"Thank you" Logan said "there's nothing you could do, but thank you. For everything"
The door rattled as it swung open, Leo walked in and froze in place, sensing the mood of the room.
"Sorry" he said "Just needed to check your ribs, make sure you didn't aggravate anything trying to get up"
He awkwardly stepped in and got to work.
"Well good news, you didn't do any damage just now, and it even feels like they're beginning to set. You're a fast healer Captain. I'd say you'll be back on your feet before too long. Perhaps we can get this young woman to help move you back home" he looked up at Ally "if you don't mind of course?"
"Oh, of course!" Ally said, standing up to face the doctor, "Anything to help out a friend." She was glad to hear he would be back in full health soon, but she promised herself she wouldn't bother him with joining the team- at least not for a while. "Is Logan going to be able to move back today?"
"I want to observe him for one more night, but maybe if you could swing by early tomorrow evening?"
Logan nodded, he'd take it light for now, research targets instead of hitting them outright, make plans while he healed, and then he'd get back on duty.
2 WEEKS LATERReaper was back on the hunt. After moving him home, Leo had been coming by every other day to check up on him. All the minor injuries had healed, and for the most part, he was back to 100%. His ribs still bothered him, but he and Leo had mitigated the issue by lining the inside of a kevlar vest with an extra couple layers of shock-absorbing gel. They spoke at length of the old days, and theorized ways to deal with Crusher if he went up against him again. Leo still had a few contacts in the military, and could probably acquire some gear if needed, but they didn't want to waste that option without a solid plan.
He picked up a tip of a deal going down between Lancers and some local Bratva, so naturally, he decided to gatecrash, maybe even pick up a few extra weapons for his armory.
In the shadows of a overlooking rooftop he crouched with an SR-25 sniper rifle, surveying the scene below. Standard set-up, Russians on one end of the alley, a pair of Lancers on the other, checking out the site before they even brought any merchandise close. It must have checked out because a few moments later, a car rolled up on the scene. Reaper's heart almost stopped when he saw the giant man step out from the back seat.
'They must be sending him along on every job now' Reaper thought as he scanned the brute, looking for any potential weakness 'There must be something that can punch through that skin of his...... that's it'
He decided it was best to not attack, not while the Crusher was around, and definitely without the hardware he had in mind. He waited until the deal was complete, then retreated, firing off a message to Leo on the burner phone his former brother-in-arms had picked up for him. After getting down from the rooftop and storing his rifle in the back of the van, Reaper decided to walk to the nearest corner store for some rations. He zipped up his coat to hide the skull insignia and set off. About halfway there, he heard a noise from an alley, the sounds of a struggle and through the darkness, Reaper though he could hear whispers of "quit squirming" he rounded the corner and marched up. He saw a woman, pressed against the brick wall in the shadow of a dumpster, and the piece of shit holding her there, pants around his knees, knife to her throat.
"Get away from her" Reaper boomed.
"Back off old man" the skinhead retorted, waving the knife around "I'll open you up if you're thinkin' of interruptin' us"
"Get. The fuck. Off her" he commanded, drawing out his broken combat knife. It may have been shattered, but it still had an edge. He unzipped his jacket and flashed the skull.
"Oh it's you huh?" he replied, as he pushed the scared young woman back into the wall he licked her ear and whispered something before walking towards Reaper, pulling his pants up as he strode "Word is out on you man, you ain't shit. Everybody seen how that bald motherfucker tossed you around. Hell, I think I will take you on first, then get back to that fine piece of ass"
"I'll even make it fair" Reaper shot back, sheathing the knife. In one swift move, Reaper slapped away the stab attempt and brought a knee up, crushing it into the man's stomach. Winded, yet unfazed, the pale homeboy came at him again, swinging wildly, Reaper simply tied up his arms and headbutted him, slipping the knife out of Skinhead's hands as he reeled away, clutching his nose.
Reaper tossed the knife down in front of himself.
"Pick it up" he spat to the scum. He could sense the hesitation as the sweating sack of shit bent over and reached out to grasp the knife handle.
"First mistake" Reaper said, as suddenly his pistol was in hand and pressed against the back of the younger man's head "Forcing yourself on her. Second mistake, taking your eye off the enemy" he pulled the trigger, killing him instantly. He looked over at the woman, who was still crouched by the dumpster, tears in her eyes.
"Are you ok?"
After a second she found her voice "Y...Yes, I think. He just grabbed me as I was walking by. He... rubbed himself all over my legs" she shuddered and choked on her words "you got here just in time, he was just about to... do it..... thank you"
He helped her to her feet and lay a comforting hand on her shoulder, she responded by hugging onto him with a grip so tight, his ribs began to burn again.
"There there" he said, patting her head as she cried "You're ok now.... do you need me to take you anywhere?"
"No... no" she said, releasing him, and wiping her eyes "My car's just down the street. Thank you so much, how can I repay you?"
"You don't need to" he said "If you're sure you're ok, you should get going, cops'll be here soon.
She thanked him again and headed off. He turned back to the corpse. Criminals thought he was done after his encounter with Crusher? He'd send them a nice clear message. He turned the body and propped it against the wall, then planted the switchblade firmly into the man's crotch and let it stick. With a bit of broken brick lying in the alley, he was able to scrape some chalklines into the wall above the body, leaving his words there for all to see. Next to it, he'd drawn a crude skull that slightly resembled the one on his shirt. With that done, he re-did his jacket and headed off about his business, the sirens growing louder and louder with each passing second.
I'M BACKAs he returned home, he noticed a small package waiting by the door of the warehouse. This was it, what he was waiting on. he brought it inside and tore into it. After nearly an hour of tinkering with the components and over-examining the blueprints, he dropped his head in defeat. He wasn't technically sound enough to pull this off, and unfortunately, he knew who he'd have to call. Ally had given him a number he could reach her at, so he called her, took a deep breath, and said the words.
"Set a meeting with the others at the place we first met. I need your help"