[OOC] Star Wars - Lawless Galaxy

[Letter Bee]

I will not be available tomorrow.

[Triesa]

Is my CS alright for casual RP?

[Sep]

@Triesa Sorry I didn't notice that, so standard protocol is to post the sheet in the OOC first, I actually didn;t pay attention and thought the CS posted there was by someone else. I'll review it tomorrow.

[DrTwit]

@SepWith IC section already 10 pages in, any suggestions on a good jumping in point?

[Triesa]

@Triesa Sorry I didn't notice that, so standard protocol is to post the sheet in the OOC first, I actually didn;t pay attention and thought the CS posted there was by someone else. I'll review it tomorrow.

@Sep

Ok, didn't know that. I admit I think my char's history is a bit weak, but I'm finding it hard to expand it.. writers block, fml.

[Zarkun]

<Snipped quote by Sep>

Ok, didn't know that. I admit I think my char's history is a bit weak, but I'm finding it hard to expand it.. writers block, fml.

@Triesa

Funnily enough, your character's backstory is my primary issue, just kinda funny happenstance. So, on that note, allow me to explain my issues with your backstory; also, hi, I'm Zarkun, a member of the Council of Squares in the Discord Server and kind of a...mod? here in the RP.

First off, how and why is he Force Sensitive? In the current iteration, there's no explanation, but it's stated that Radda is a Force Sensitive Bounty Hunter. With that said, your current iteration is better fitting for an exceptionally skilled non-Sensitive assassin who's well known for getting high end contracts. More than that, how does he even know about it? The Empire legitimately buried evidence of the Force.

Second issue, how does a teen with supposedly no prior experience get a perfect throat slit? Especially since even with the stab wounds to the back, his father would be thrashing around to try and dislodge the lad. Simply put, it doesn't make any kind of sense, as cool as it sounds.

Third issue is the lack of how he became a cyborg. Just another thing that's just kinda...there. Now it's fine that he is, but an explanation of what happened to cause it would be good.

Fourth and...well, we'll settle for final issue, is how he became a swordsman. Again, just there, with no real reason why. Also, with how did he come into possession of a B-Wing fighter? The Rebels were the only ones to have them manufactured, literally.

[DrTwit]

also, hi, I'm Zarkun, a member of the Council of Squares in the Discord Server

@Zarkun

That's one hell of a title :D

[Zarkun]

<Snipped quote by Zarkun>

That's one hell of a title :D

@DrTwit

The council's name is partly my fault, I suggested Council of the Square Table, since Arthur had his knights of the round.

[Triesa]

@Zarkun

It's by no coincidence that my backstory is your primary issue. I struggled to invent as I was writing it and knew it was bad, yet couldn't fix it.

Hi, I'm Triesa.

Everything you pointed out is truth. I find character history difficult to write.. it's like trapping fire in a bottle. What you read was my first attempt at writing an RP CS and yes it made no sense, not solely on the fact that I'm inexperienced at roleplaying, but because- I admit I really don't know much about the star wars universe even though I really like SW. I look around and everyone seems to know a great deal so I was a little daunted at the idea of possibly jumping into this with posts largely relying on slice of life masquerading as SW, without understanding the world to make it convincing.

I'm thinking Radda being purely a bounty hunter could work if I give him a good enough motive...

K, my CS is still a WIP assuming I can even fit into this roleplay.

[Zarkun]

@Zarkun

It's by no coincidence that my backstory is your primary issue. I struggled to invent as I was writing it and knew it was bad, yet couldn't fix it.

Hi, I'm Triesa.

Everything you pointed out is truth. I find character history difficult to write.. it's like trapping fire in a bottle. What you read was my first attempt at writing an RP CS and yes it made no sense, not solely on the fact that I'm inexperienced at roleplaying, but because- I admit I really don't know much about the star wars universe even though I really like SW. I look around and everyone seems to know a great deal so I was a little daunted at the idea of possibly jumping into this with posts largely relying on slice of life masquerading as SW, without understanding the world to make it convincing.

I'm thinking Radda being purely a bounty hunter could work if I give him a good enough motive...

K, my CS is still a WIP assuming I can even fit into this roleplay.

@Triesa

Well, I'm fine with him being a swordsman. Perhaps before his dad goes off the deep end he was teaching Radda. Motive for BH...that's easy, money. Whether it be fore selfish reasons or to provide for his mom and sister. Just no Mando Armor please. You can fit into it, just don't be afraid to ask for help.

[Sep]

@DrTwit There's currently a fight involving Marrick a darkside user on Nar Shadda. There was also just a large scale attack on the Hutts by the radical terrorists called the Believers.

[DrTwit]

@SepThanks, I'll look through the pages for more context

[Triesa]

Updated my CS. Should I have still posted in here first? I was just editing my previous post so I thought I'd leave it in the CS thread.. up to you.

[Zarkun]

Updated my CS. Should I have still posted in here first? I was just editing my previous post so I thought I'd leave it in the CS thread.. up to you.

@Triesa

First nitpick, Empire has only fallen a few months prior to the start of the RP.

Second; the tracking thing. It's kinda...vague. How does he track a target through a city scape, especially if say, this person has been on the run for awhile and has gotten good at blending in. Also there's the vision thing, I can't say it granting him foresight is OK...since you say it lets him see his opponent's moves before they make them.

[Triesa]

First nitpick, Empire has only fallen a few months prior to the start of the RP.

@Zarkun

Edited, assuming I fixed the thing you were referring to.

Second; the tracking thing. It's kinda...vague. How does he track a target through a city scape, especially if say, this person has been on the run for awhile and has gotten good at blending in.

@Zarkun

Are you talking about the point I made in the strength section? Can that not be something I make an example of IC?

Also there's the vision thing, I can't say it granting him foresight is OK...since you say it lets him see his opponent's moves before they make them.

@Zarkun

That part I left over from my first draft that you saw, true, I shouldn't have left it in. He's not a force user anymore, so I changed it up.

[Zarkun]

<Snipped quote by Zarkun> Edited, assuming I fixed the thing you were referring to.

<Snipped quote by Zarkun> Are you talking about the point I made in the strength section? Can that not be something I make an example of IC?

<Snipped quote by Zarkun>That part I left over from my first draft that you saw, true, I shouldn't have left it in. He's not a force user anymore, so I changed it up.

@Triesa

You mostly fixed it. Just add Rise of the Empire to what he read.

[Triesa]

@Zarkun

Haha k, good call.
~

Ready for review.

[Zarkun]

@Zarkun

Haha k, good call.
~

Ready for review.

@Triesa

I'd post it here and mention Sep so he can look it over.

[Triesa]

@Sep Here you go.

Radda Cliecies

Radda Cliecies

Name:Radda Cliecies
Species:Human
Age:34
Faction:Independent
Equipment:L-336 Sniper Rifle, DI-44 Blaster, Holo-Projector, Stims, Vibroblade, flask

Skills:
-Sniper Rifles/Blasters: He's spent his time growing up turning everything in sight into a target. As he grew older he gained a respect for the Sniper rifle, his main weapon, and he's an exceptional shot.

- Patience: Willing to sit out of situations and just observe until he’s gained the needed information to execute.

- Vision: His vision is impeccable. It allows him to spot enemies far before they spot him, and distinguish people of importance from the rest of the crowd, and keep them in sight.

-Tracking/Recon: "If its been here, I'll find it." Radda will use intuition and insight to track bounties or other people of interest to the very edge of the galaxy if he has to. Since he was young and pickpocketing he's had to follow his marks at a distance not too close, but not so far that he loses sight of them.

-Tech: In his unique line of work as a bounty dealer/hunter, a firm knowledge and use of tech is required. He can hardwire many types of circuitry, and delve into forbidden databases. As The Spider weaves its web, he weaves through files.

Weaknesses:
- Women: His attractions to fine women often narrows his attention, causing him to lose sight of other tasks at hand.

- Loyalty: He is not loyal to anyone, meaning it is pretty hard to secure a good working relationship. He’ll take what he needs then move on to the next place.

-Physical: He's often seen as weak because he's lanky and lacks muscle. If it comes to a brawl, he'll likely go down.. but he's working on it.

-Alcohol: Drinks too much. He usually drinks from his flask when on the job, then when he has down time he's often at a cantina drinking more, and it clouds his judgment and impairs his reflexes.

History:
“I looked out onto the city and I saw a web.”

When night fell over Nal Hutta, the air was of a different quality, it was something more alive and dreadful. What’s more dreadful is the dwellers at night, the ones without home, credit, or dream, who take advantage of the dark and get into all kinds of trouble. The streets where busy with everything from petty crime, to homicide, and eventually the city couldn’t keep up with the mess being made, so bodies would be found among the sleeping, across all sectors and down alleys. Finding them was easy; distinguishing the two was the hard part. Thieves- all of them, honest- none of them, but a rare few guided themselves with a personal code of conduct, these ones would maybe survive...
~
Radda Cliecies was a prime example of survival in the swampy underworld. Radda entered the world alone and fully expects to leave the world the same way. All his life he’s been without parent or caretaker, left completely to himself to survive the harsh world. As a youth he always believed he was born out of the dirt of the nasty Hutt planet. For Radda, as a child and ever after, he has been very pleased to never have had parents- “Who needs em, yesss?” He would do whatever it took to get by, which meant steal mostly, sometimes pure intimidation had to do, but that never really suited him, for he has always been a very slender person, with long wiry arms and legs, and fingers too. He was definitely not meant to fight that was for sure, so instead he trained his mind, and read constantly about the old days of the Old Republic, the Jedi and the Sith, The Clone Wars, Rise of the Empire and so on. When Radda was around fourteen he founded his first crew of thieves. They set out to make a name for themselves as a high risk- high reward group. Radda orchestrated the jobs to be had and distributed the credits he owed to the rest of them. They were known as The Web. It was at this time that Radda gathered the nickname “The Spider.”
~
Things went well for The Web, they prospered and as months turned into years, and old members were replaced with newer- more capable ones, profits rose to an all time high. Now with the respect Radda desired from various mob bosses, and a well adjusted crew, and of course more credits than he’s ever had in his life- he felt a new sense of glory... but he wanted more. He wanted in on the Hutt cartel.
~
He never got in with the Hutts. The Web did well for their age but never broke through, leaving them just under the radar of the bigger players in the game. Eventually The Web disbanded when one of the members turned on Radda, demanding more credits than the rest because he felt his role was more important than the others. The guy was a Weequay named Tithos Veeve, who was always in a bad mood and stank of alcohol. Radda was seventeen during this time and was finally getting good with blasters since it was the safest choice for staying alive. He would often shoot at street signs and lights hanging from buildings, he could even hit targets while running. Tithos hadn’t known just how good Radda got with the blaster, so like the fool he was, Tithos made a move for his blaster and in the next moment Radda had him beat with his blaster pointed between his eyes.

“You crossed the fucking line!” Said Radda

“I- I.. forgive me!” Says Tithos, but instead of mercy, he is met with wraith... blackness.

After that Radda broke the group. The possibility of a mutiny or another revolt was not okay with him, and so this is when Radda decides to work as an independent bounty hunter/dealer.
~
As the years went on Radda grew up into a more capable man than he’d ever imagined. His ability at hand to hand combat was passable, but what really stood out was his ability to use blasters, more specifically sniper rifles of all sorts. Radda was never going to be the big fighter when it comes down to it, he valued his health too much. Instead he stayed at a distance and often rose and set with the moon, keeping to the dark, always heavily camouflaged and lining up his shots to make them count. Business with the Hutts had come to him after all this time. Although Radda had not yet taken bounties from the Hutt lords yet- he did smuggle firearms and spice among other things such as slaves and stolen Jedi holocrons, all in the name of the Hutts. But Radda doesn’t care about the Hutts any more than he does bantha fodder on the dry deserts of Tatooine. He is only loyal to himself and he likes to keep it that way.
~
Today he still spins his web with great care. His primary work is to deal out bounties and see to it that everyone gets the credits their owed. Half his time is spent in his office on Nar Shadda where he has the most space to work; the other half is up in orbit in his B-Wing starfighter he’d resurrected from the overgrowth of Yavin 4. He loves the starfighter for it’s extensive array of weaponry such as four laser cannons, proton torpedoes, and ion cannons, all despite its smaller size. The only downside is its inadequate cockpit space. He’d love to be able to work in orbit and so he looks out for his next upgrade on the side of all his business.
~
Its late in the day and Radda is hanging out at Kuzbar’s Cantina, a place he often frequented when he had some down time. Right now he was casually watching a Sabacc game at a nearby table, while he waited for one of his contacts to deliver a shipment of sub-repeating blasters to a nearby cargo bay. The Sabacc game was heating up Radda noticed as he drank Nikta with several small sips. The two players cast cards with the intensity high stakes and plenty of drink comes with. One was a Weequay (Radda detests Weequays,) and the other, a drunk Dug with an apparent gambling problem. Radda couldn’t decide who’s side he was on.. then lost interest and turned back to his drink.

“Where the hell is that mangy Trandoshan with my shipment- yesss?”

[Sep]

@Triesa Accepted.