A friendly Spar-After the battle
When they arrived at the front of Damien's place, Nolan's looked bewildered. He looked at the canal behind them and then to the house next to Damien's, Nolan's house. How long were they neighbors for? How did they not notice it?
"Uh... This is awkward."God dammit, looks like his own hidden abode is no longer so hidden anymore. Glancing up from his unlocking of his door and followed Nolan's gaze. After a moment of thought, it clicked why he said what he said and Damian shrugged.
"Well, that explains why I keep having to chase Dalton off my roof. You know he's taken to spying on the butcher's daughter across the canal?""Wait what? Is that why he's been giving me dirty looks? I thought it was because she was constantly giving goo goo eyes." In hindsight, those were probably both the reasons why the butcher glared at him like that.
He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.
"I shouldn't be surprised. That damn cat leers at whatever is wearing a skirt." Chuckling, Damian opens the door and beckons Nolan in.
"Well, I wouldn't worry too much about it. When I caught him this morning, I trimmed his pompadour an inch or two and threatened to turn him into a fur coat the next time I caught him." Closing the door as he steps in, he heads for the kitchen.
"I think he's still in mourning over the minuscule amount of hair I cut off.""Huh, that explains a lot actually." Nolan followed Damien in his house and looked around the house, feeling a bit out of place. He wasn't sure what to do at the moment; should he help Damien cook? He could, but what if Damien is the kind of person that doesn't let his guests help because they are his guests. Then again Nolan didn't want to be freeloader either.
"Been looking for him?" Damian opened the fridge up and started looking through it to see what he had. Finding nothing, he opened the freezer and smiled at what he found first. Pulling them out, he headed to the back door and then the back porch, where his barbecue was.
"Don't mind bratwursts, do you?""Eh, he's probably just moping somewhere around the guild. He survived before meeting me so I'm not worried." Nolan followed Damien out to his back porch.
"Sounds all good to me. I'm not one to turn down a good sausage." Yes, he knew what that sounded like, but he was just going to go with it.
"Good to hear." For several minutes, silence reigned as the Blade of Phoenix Wing started the barbecue up and began setting the sausages on the grill. There were a lot of questions that Damian had for the Ash God Slayer, but he really didn't want to pry too much and put an end to this budding bit of trust. Finally, he picked something.
"So, I guess all I have to ask is where does your story begin?" Nolan had sat down on a wooden chair and leaned back into it. His body was still recovering from the initial spar with Damien. He let out a long whistle as he tried to figure out how to begin this.
"I guess I should begin with my childhood. Ever heard of Waltz and Co.? After Heartfilia Konzern fell into ruin, Waltz would become one of the wealthiest businesses and continue to do so. I was the son and heir to the company." Nolan coughed, feeling a bit weird telling Damien, a man who used to be a child soldier, that he came from a life of privilege.
"I was actually the youngest child of three, but traditionally in our family the heir of the company is someone who has the ability to use magic. In this case, I was the only one who had that ability. I guess you could say that I won the biological lottery." He forced a chuckle, but he certainly wasn't fooling anyone.
"Yeah, I certainly won the lottery until it was swallowed by the sea.""I take it a ship you were on got caught up in a freak storm?" Nolan nodded and said,
"Freak was an understatement. My father always brought us on his business trips to other countries. We were heading to Caelum when it happened." He sat there in silence for a moment until he broke it.
"I saw my mother get crushed to death by the ship's mast and I could only assume that everyone else drowned to their deaths. The only ones that survived were my brother, my sister, and I, but I wouldn't know that for a long, long time.""When I woke up, I was on the shores of Caelum alone. Tell me Damien, have you ever been to Caelum before?" Damian shakes his head, turning over the brats with a set of tongs.
"Can't say I have. All my battles as a kid were fought with a home field advantage along Fiore's border.""Then you're lucky. It is the most dangerous country in all of Ishgar. It's a lawless wasteland of human misery and corruption. The strong devour the weak. The rich live in a secluded haven where they are allowed to do as they please. It's their playground and they employ the scum of the world to meet their desires." He looked down at the ground, wondering how much he should tell Damien.
"Slavers especially make a killing there. There is always a need for slaves there." Nolan was scratching his neck now, something that could be written off as Nolan being uncomfortable rather than a nervous tick. Damian looks at his guild mate, a frown crossing his features.
"And it was slavers who found you, freshly washed up on the beach, wasn't it?" Nolan did not respond to Damien for quite awhile. This is the closest to Nolan allowing himself to being emotionally vulnerable that he had ever been, heck, more vulnerable than when Ariel and him were trapped in the painting together.
"Yes... They captured me and were going to pimp me out, but she...she." A lump in his throat made it near impossible for him to speak and he was beginning to tremble.
"Easy, Nolan. Say it when you're ready to say it. Don't force it out." Slavers had always been despicable to the former child soldier, degenerate pieces of crap that forced others into a life of things that no human being should have to go through. To know that his guild mate had been forced through it...that bothered him. Nolan took a deep breath and exhaled. His fingers ran through his own hair as he tried to gain some form of composure. In the end, Nolan just looked tired; tired from keeping his life a secret, tired of the terrors, tired of the constant anxiety.
"She called herself The Madame. She was the one in charge of the whole operation." He sighed and leaned forward in his seat a bit.
"She never sold me to anyone. She took a liking to me and kept me as a pet... And whatever she wanted me to do, I had to do it." Damian's frown deepened, threatening to become a scowl.
"I get the feeling that I'm not going to like where this goes." Nolan glanced up at Damien and averted his gaze. His silence provided more of a response than words could say. And so the scowl came as he turned the brats again.
"I hope she's dead and burning in her special place in hell. Slavers aren't even human anymore as far as I'm concerned."Nolan chuckled in a bitter manner and said,
"We'll never really know for sure then. She either was turned into cinders or she escaped with her life. I wish I could say that she is dead, but the world isn't as kind as to punish those that deserve it. I think we can both at least agree on that." As he spoke, Nolan pulled out a long, thin metal pipe and a small, dark brown jar that when opened it had tobacco in it.
"And yet, it was because of that I was able to meet him, the man that rescued me I mean." He pulled a small wad of tobacco out and stuffed it into his pipe.
"His name was Arjuna, the man that would become my mentor, confidant, and my father.""Sounds like a good man in a bad place. Happens far too often for my tastes." Nolan had to stifle a chuckle.
"A good man with a list of vices, but a good man nonetheless." Nolan lit the tobacco in his pipe and he took a long drag from the pipe.
"It wasn't just him though; everyone in the temple taught me, fed me, and dressed me. They cared for me and even though we did not have much, it was enough for me." Damian nodded.
"Lived pretty barebones myself despite the positions my parents held in the military. We were a border patrol unit, so we didn't get much leave.""We were self-sufficient for the most part. It was impossible to form a trade with communities with all of the organized crime and whatnot. Not to mention we tried our best to remain hidden from the rest of the world so we could protect our secrets. And I don't mean just our magic." He held his pipe in between his fingers lazily.
"I know this is a sudden shift in topic, but Damien, do believe in the existence of the Gods?" His tone wasn't filled with curiosity, but rather, stiff and unsure as if he was starting to regret his question. Damian thinks as he pulls off the first round of brats, four of them, before setting the next four on.
"Well, I couldn't say. I do believe in Death, having seen and dealt a fair amount of it in my time alive. But gods? If they exist, they've never bothered me and I'm OK with that.""Then perhaps under any other circumstances I would allow you to be blissfully ignorant, but such luxuries are dangerous." The slayer stood up from his seat and approached Damien. The aggressiveness of his words were betrayed by an underlying fear that Nolan was attempting to conceal.
"We mortals are so concerned with our own squabbles that we tend to not notice what goes on beyond us. It's understandable why you think the way that you do. The fault falls upon my forerunners and myself for being so paranoid and holding our secrets so close to our chests."Nolan leaned against the railing and tapped the burnt tobacco out of his pipe over the ledge.
"And I am the only one left in this world that knows the truth." Just saying those words made him look like a man racked with pain.
"I am the sole survivor of our genocide. They, the Gods, sent their messenger and... they took my family away from me, yet he let me live." Damian considered his next words carefully, trying to figure out how to say what he wanted to. Finally, unable to come up with a less blunt way to put, he speaks.
"Do you know if this messenger can bleed?""Everything bleeds, Damien. It's just the fact that killing a god is much more complicated than just destroying their bodies." The Slayer held his hand out over the railing and a black sphere of ashes formed over his palm.
"You can kill a god as many times as you want, but their very existence is one that defies our logic. They are so powerful that even if you kill them through normal means, their soul will persist and they will revive."Nolan watched as he let the sphere of ashes dance around in the air with the movements of his fingers.
"The purpose of a God Slayer is to not only kill the body, but to make sure that the gods can never be revived again. It takes the power of a god to kill a god. You witnessed yourself earlier when we sparred." Damian disappeared inside the house briefly, retrieving another couple of plates along with some buns and condiments, and started putting together a bratwurst.
"What I saw when we were sparring a mage who was trying to get a grip on his own magic and strength, not the strength of a God. Not to mention something about that golden magic you used though..." Damian fell silent again, working on the brat without speaking. Finally, as he finished, he spoke again.
"It's not natural is it? I saw the pain on your face after you forced it down.""I meant the magic itself." Nolan's face flared red in embarrassment and he averted his eyes from Damien's. With a grabbing motion, the sphere of ashes dispersed and he turned to face Damien.
"It's..." He hesitated for a moment as he tried to find the right words.
"It's something that was awoken in me during the games. On the day off, I wound up getting involved with fighting a mage so powerful that I dare say he could match a Wizard Saint and I...I was paralyzed with absolute fear. I've fought many people Damien, but I've never felt the fear of imminent death as much as I did that day."A sigh escaped his lips and he removed his sword from his belt.
"That's when I encountered The Goddess bound to the sword made of her very body." Damian didn't answer right away, opting instead to take a bite of food and move away from the brats so that Nolan could get his and he could turn the others over. Finally, he decided what to say.
"It makes sense, Nolan, but you still didn't answer the question. Is it natural?""God Slayer Magic in itself is unnatural; we take on the abilities of gods, yet remain human enough. We are dancing on the line between mortals and gods." Nolan grabbed some of the food that Damien cooked and took a bite from it.
"The power you saw was something that cannot be awoken by yourself for the first time. It requires the power of a god or equal to it to even enter that form and well, it's much more power than my body can handle right now. Every time I use it, it feels like my atoms are being stretched and torn apart." Damian sighed as Nolan continued dancing around the question and pushed onwards to other things.
"Alright, so don't answer the question. Suppose it doesn't much matter at this point. Still, it comes back to control of your emotions. And that will become easier when we finish discussing what we started with. After this messenger left, how long before you came to Fiore?" He placed the food down and ran his finger through his hair.
"It was awhile. I wandered around Caelum aimlessly and at that time I was looking for an excuse to beat people up. I ended up tackling criminal groups by myself with reckless abandon, but at that time I let them live. The me then was far more foolishly hopeful that justice would prevail in that hell hole, but..." Nolan sighed heavily and looked down at the food. He laid the palm of his right hand on his stomach.
"I ended up staying in a village that somehow managed to protect itself. I was wounded and hadn't eaten in days, but they took me in. A family took me in and took care of me. The village had a doctor, Doctor Cornell. He was the villages' saint; he took care of everyone and he never asked for anything in return."His face had suddenly turned white as a sheet.
"Around the time I was there, something odd was happening; the children were disappearing. I had investigated and realized that they were being taken at night so I stayed out at night and found a child climbing out of a window. I confronted her, but her eyes were hollow, as if she was hypnotized. I followed her and we arrived at the doctor's home. I learned later that he was controlling them via mind control from a potion he mixed in with their vaccinations."Nolan took a deep breath and continued on.
"I broke into his house and I confronted him. I thought he was selling the children into slavery, but...but... he chopped them up and sold them on the black market as food. I tortured him until he told me everything; where it was going, who he was selling it too. When he had nothing else left, I beheaded him and hung his corpse by the roof with his head in between his arms."He looked down, trying his best to keep his gaze away from Damien's. He did not want him to see the pain in his eyes.
"After that, I became convinced that the only way to bring peace was through bloodshed, but honestly, that was just an excuse to let my grief and rage to control me. I've killed a lot of people Damien, a lot of people. They were criminals, but I had sunken below them and the worst part is that I ran away. I was a wanted criminal, but I managed to sneak on a ship to Fiore." Damian pursed his lips as Nolan spoke, rolling the brats over again. He would be lying if he told the God Slayer that he wouldn't have done the same with the doctor, but that was neither here nor there. What did matter was fleeing from his arrest, and given what Nolan had told Damian about Caelum, he might have been smart in doing so.
"Caelum's a fairly lawless place, right? Would you have been given a real and fair trial, do you think? If you'd let them arrest you, what would have happened?""You're even more ignorant of Caelum than I thought you were." Nolan placed his plate down and pushed it away.
"I pissed off Caelum's oligarchy and nobleman, the people who were benefiting from the illegal trades of the black market in the first place. Only a few things would have had happened; I either would have been executed or would have been sold off as a slave. Honestly, sometimes I think I rather would have been better off dead." "Do you know how hard it is to face our guild everyday? I only meant to join as a temporary means of survival, but I became attached to you all. When I first joined, I believed that killing was the only solution in a world without justice, but now I am ashamed of myself." He had buried his face in his hands and groaned loudly.
"I am ashamed of becoming a murderer and everyday, everyday I am terrified that I am going to lose the life that I had built for myself here." Damian set his own food down and stepped forwards, resting a hand on Nolan's shoulder.
"The first lesson of right and wrong is that any man who benefits from the activities of criminals while claiming to have no part in their dealings is both a liar and a criminal themselves. Caelum is ruled by corrupt government officials and nobles, not good people. That said, I may not have killed criminals, but killing another person in battle, a person who has an entire life in front of them before you slice 'em open and run 'em through, well, it was still in cold blood, hardly a second thought given at the time. Getting older and being away from the military, I realize that what I did was wrong, no matter the reason. But that doesn't stop me from moving forwards." The Blade of Phoenix Wing steps away and goes inside, where the sound of rummaging could be heard. After about ten minutes, he finally comes back out, holding an old looking shield with the emblem of another nation on it.
"This was a momento from one of my first battles. Do you know why I've kept it all these years?" Nolan removed his face from his hands looked at the shield that Damien presented to him.
"As a reminder of the person you killed and of your past?" Damian chuckled, setting it against a pole.
"You're half right. I keep it to remind me that I took the man's life, yes, but also to remind me that if I hadn't, how many more would have been harmed? Soldiers often say that they'll gladly give their life for their country, and that is because if they die, then the people they care about don't. Yes, taking the owner's life was horrible, but in the long run, I might have saved dozens or even hundreds of other lives.""And yet, you are able to say that without any fear in your heart. I wish I could do the same." Nolan laid his hand on his chest, over where his heart should be.
"Actions all have consequences and I can only fear that mine will catch up to me. I have to be strong, but will I ever be strong enough to face it?" Damian shrugs as he removes the second batch of bratwursts and turns off the barbecue, gathering up the uncooked ones.
"As unhelpful as this will sound, only you will know that when the time comes. What I do know is you won't face it alone."There was a moment of silence between the two mages. After all of this, Nolan was not sure what he should say. Try as he might, he cannot help, but to feel awkward; this is the first time he had poured his heart out as much as he had just now. He shifted around uncomfortably, wringing his hands together.
"I, uh...Thanks." Damian nodded, picking his plate back up and taking another bite of his brat.
"Be aware that I'm always here for a good talk, no matter what. So that said, let's talk about this Goddess, since I know she's been listening by now. You trust her?""I don't have a choice to trust her. My training was never completed nor under any other circumstances could it have ever been completed. Without a god's guidance, a God Slayer can only get so far before they hit a wall." Nolan pushed the long locks of hair laying on his neck to show Damien the lotus seal that showed the pact between the mortal and deity.
"For better or for worse, I've bound myself to her as both her student and champion. I can't help, but to wonder if there are other God Slayers who have made contact with a god." Damian shrugs, taking another bite.
"There probably are, but I'm willing to bet the encounter didn't end well for one or both parties. However, you danced around my question. Sure, you agreed to let her teach you and to champion her cause, as you've just revealed, but you didn't say whether or not you trust her, inferring you had no choice, which isn't true. There's always a choice, Nolan, it's just which one you pick that matters. Now, do you trust her?" The answer would determine if Damian needed to keep an eye on the God Slayer or trust him to seek help when he needed it, but he kept that bit to himself. He trusted his guildmate, it was this goddess that the Blade of Phoenix Wing didn't trust.
He saw that he was starting to test Damien's patience and decided to just not dance around the question.
"I don't know if I do or not, but it's a risk that I am willing to take." Nolan grabbed the plate he pushed away and took another bite from his bratwurst. There are many things that he wants to say, to tell Damien, but his doubts lingered with him.
"It's strange. I feel like I have to live in two worlds at once: one of the regular mortal and one who is aware of gods." He looked down at his sandwich. Unknowingly, his hands were shaking as he seemed to be thinking of how to explain. "
I know so much, I've seen so much and yet to the rest of the world I'd look like a maniac. I mean really, I find myself talking to her, but I look crazy to others." He motioned his hand to
The Goddess, but of course, only Nolan could see her.
"You know he can't see me right?" She asked him only to receive a blank stare from the mage. Damian shrugged.
"If it's any consolation, I CAN sense her, sort of. Something that powerful doesn't walk around with you and not get noticed by those who can sense power. In fact, it likely explains a lot about some of the people I've met over the years. No one who knows them well had ever seen them use magic, and yet this incredible power seemed to seep from their pores. So, I suppose I can say this," he levels his gaze with where he could feel the magic from strongly,
"cross me at your own risk. I don't need to be a god slayer to make you spend time thinking about mistreating someone. Waiting until he was desperate was a despicable move, not to mention cowardly. Know that I don't trust you for it, nor will I ever. Not to mention I know a Fire God Slayer personally who's always looking for a chance to flex his muscles." Well, that last part wasn't true, and Gods help them if she found out about his fear of cats, but she didn't need know that.
"He's long winded isn't he? Definitely the kind of guy that loves to posture." She commented on Damien's long threat nonchalantly. It's not like it was the first time that a man made a threat towards her, or person in general.
"Yeah, he tends to do that." Nolan responded to her without using their telepathic bond. It's not like he needs to hide her since Damien knows.
The Goddess smirked and leaned forward so that she was face to face with him. It's been awhile since a mortal was the one to make threat to her, kind of like a barking chihuahua.
"I wonder if he realizes that he can't fight a dead person." She said with a teasing manner.
The God Slayer couldn't help, but to roll his eyes at the two of them. They were just acting ridiculous.
"Okay that's enough out of you both...Though does it matter since you can't hear her?""I don't need to be able to hear her, she just needs to be able to hear me." All the same, Damian stopped and took a couple more bites out of his brat, watching the sun glitter off the snow. After a few minutes, and another bratwurst, he speaks once more.
"Any questions for me?""No, there's no need." Nolan felt his hand twinge in pain from the nerve damage he received from the partial transformation. He glanced down at his hand and just shoved it in his pocket and hoped that Damien wouldn't notice.
"I'm sorry for taking so much of your time. I should get going." Nodding, Damian continues eating.
"No bother to me at all, Nolan. Nice change of pace actually.""Still, I'll take my leave. Thank you for your hospitality." Nolan headed towards the door and pushed it open, but stopped midway through the door and spoke with a hint of melancholy.
"There are a lot of things that I haven't told you. There are many things that I want to say, but I'm not ready yet. For now I just want to hold on to the time that I have here with everyone." With that being said, he waved Damien off and saw himself out of Damien's home. For the first time in a long, long time his body felt weightless.
Damian remained on his back porch for a long time after Nolan left, mulling over what he'd learned of his guild mate and making notes of important names. As an S-Class wizard, he had a duty to make sure everyone was safe along with representing Phoenix Wing. This Madame...if he ever got the time, the Blade of Phoenix Wing might just pay the woman a visit and put an end to her operation permanently. He smiled grimly at the thought and then gathered up the cooked brats and headed inside with them and the buns and condiments. It was time to head back to the guild hall.