[IC] The Many Adventures of the Life Guards (Shade and Diz)

[MonsieurShade]

Zuma beach - Malibu, California

For many people, the beaches of Malibu were a perfect getaway, clear seas, white sandy beaches, and a board walk simply chock full of stores and restaurants for those looking to shop, grab a bite, and get out of the sun for a bit. It was certainly not the sort of place one would expect "Jesus christ, where did they go? Shit, did you see what happened to Ivan?!", to be the start of a conversation, nor would one expect "FUCK Ivan, we gotta get out of here before we get caught next!" as a follow up. This was indeed a conversation however, and it was taking place between a pair of men right now as they tore through the boardwalk on a pair of quad bikes, forcing people to flee lest they be run down. These two men -originally three- had decided to hold up a particularly popular burger joint for some fast cash. What they found instead of a quick buck and possibly some boardwalk fries, was resistance in the form of one very disgruntled patron. "Javelin!" A coarse voice snarled seconds before a section of the boardwalk exploded, showering a few patrons with slivers of wood and bits of sand. The men came to a halt and began looking around frantically, trying to find the source of the explosion, they didn't have to search very long; "Up here dipsticks.". The men's heads snapped up to find the harsh gaze of one Dimitri Santos, better known locally as Pulse bearing down on them like a hawk. Dimitri held his hand in the air, index finger still extended, his other hand -this one cybernetic- rested firmly on his hip. "Twenty five minutes. That's how long I waited to get my seat. TWENTY. FIVE .MINUTES. And the moment I get a seat, you guys decided that it was a good day to rob the place! A couple of fuckin' rocket scientists the two of you are. Banks and tourists galore and you choose a burger joint.". One of the men tried to pull off suddenly, figuring he might get some distance before Pulse reacted. What happened instead was that he found himself going airborne as Pulse blew off one of the tires with a bit more power than necessary, "Oh no, you're going to sit there and listen to me call you an idiot some more! Any attempts at escape will turn this into you sitting there trying not to pass out from having your legs shattered!". Dimitri continued to hurl insults at the men, many of which were colorful combinations of words that caused nearby parents to cover their children's ears.

[Mistress Dizzy]

The man who had gotten blasted into midair by the burst tire would be caught by a wave of sand. It would keep him from hitting solid ground at top speed, but he'd probably have sand in every orifice for the next week.

"See what you've done?" A young woman's voice floated through the air, disembodied. "He just gets so grumpy when he's hungry!" A figure appeared, shimmering to visibility out of nowhere. She was dark skinned and heavily curved, her eyes bright orange behind a complex mask. Her hair was frost white and short, and she wore an orange robe decorated with an golden octopus. In the woman's hand was a shiny staff carved with all sorts of magic runes. A few of them were lit up with a strange light, one that stopped when the sand dropped the man with a thud. "I'll have to hear about his missed burger for hours."

She moved her hand in a slashing motion, and watched one of the unlucky thieves all but crumple, clutching his ears and screaming in pain.

"Agggh- make the noise stop, make it stop!"

Mirage moved forward, the staff held like a physical weapon along the length of her arm. She knew that the crook's partners could not hear what he did. That would cause enough confusion that it would be easier to separate and then disable all three of them completely.

"Now, gentlemen." She smiled, revealing teeth that were a bit too fine and sharp to be human. "Who's next?"

[MonsieurShade]

Pulse's jaw audibly clacked shut and his left brow cocked up a bit as the man he'd decided to send airborne was saved from only god knew how many medical visits due to a wave of sand breaking his fall. "Nice t'see you kept pace, Mirage- wait, what was that you said?! You know how much food I need to keep myself going? Add that to the wait and I'm damn right to be "grumpy"!". He leapt down from the rooftop he stood upon and landed on his hands and feet with a solid thump, the scowl on his face deepened even further. Pulse slowly rose and dusted off his hands, "My current and fully justifiable piss n' vinegar attitude aside, you should've let that guy splat on the pavement, but we'll talk about that later.". As the thief who Mirage had saved slowly tried to get to his feet only to fall back to the ground and scream in pain, the only one that was still fully intact shuddered a bit as he weighed his options.

Quite frankly, after seeing them both in action he wasn't sure which one was more frightening between Pulse and Mirage. It was clear to anyone with common sense that fleeing and fighting were both no longer viable options, and that surrender was the best course of action. Sadly, common sense was not common, as evidenced by the man raising his fists in a last desperate bid for a chance at escape, "C-Come on! I'm not afraid of you!" he shouted unconvincingly. Pulse snorted and rolled his eyes, "Oh look, the brain trust wants to get physical.". The hero started to step forward and crack his knuckles, but stopped and turned to his partner with a wicked smirk, "Sorry, did you wanna take a crack at him? Be a nice little refresher course for all those close quarter combat drills I put you through, don't you think?".

[Mistress Dizzy]

Mirage looked just as unconvinced as Pulse was when the crook said he wasn't afraid. Of course he was afraid, but he was also very stupid, apparently. Even animals knew when to quit and save themselves pain.

"Yes, I do think I'll handle this. So thoughtful of you to leave me some work to do." She knew that Pulse could take care of the city by himself if he so chose. His power was just that incredible. Her presence as his partner was really more like a shield- for the criminals unlucky to run into him. Knowing that Pulse would have no qualms about beating the life out of lawbreakers, Mirage was there to keep him from becoming a hero with bloodied hands.

Mirage drove her staff into the sand, leaving sticking out at an angle and slightly glowing with power. Anyone aside from Pulse who dared touch it would get a nice dose of electricity for their transgression.

"Come, then. If you have no fear, then prove it." Mirage swept her robe back, freeing her legs, and took a stance quite like a boxer's. Her feet stayed firm, though, and she waited.

[MonsieurShade]

The criminal gulped loudly as Mirage stepped up to take him in a fight. He clenched and unclenched his shaking hands, realizing that he'd very likely made a terrible mistake. Still there was no turning back now, and with his best war cry the criminal ran at Mirage whilst swinging wildly to try and improve his chances of scoring a blow. Pulse simply stood by and admired Mirage's stance with a bit of pride. She'd come a long way since Pulse had taken her in as his protege, and while she was still plenty down to earth she no longer carried the same awkward and overly cautious air that she did when first starting out. Perhaps close proximity to Mirage had made him slightly soft in his time, but Pulse momentarily considered telling the criminal how piss poor his attempts at fighting looked. This consideration was brief, and what Pulse did instead, was rest one arm on Mirage's staff and chuckle as he awaited the ass kicking to come.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Mirage had enough time to shoot Pulse a look, one that clearly said 'seriously?' before the fight started. She took the criminal's blows on the forearm, easily blocking his wild swings. Once he was done flailing at her, she shifted her weight and hit him. One fist high to the temple, the next on the jaw. The last was pointed up at his nose, and with a groan and a thump like a sack of wet sand, the crook was down.

Frowning, Mirage looked at her hand. "...fool got his blood on me." She stepped on the unconscious thief's chest, and wiped the blood on his shirt. There was plenty more anyway, his nose was bleeding all down his chin.

"Well. I think that wraps it up, don't you?" She yanked her staff free in one motion, and winced. "I think he may have actually bruised me." Showing him her forearm, she activated a spell with her staff, turning the sand around the criminals into solid earth, and imprisoning them where they lay.

[MonsieurShade]

As Mirage wrapped things up by soundly beating and detaining the thief and his companion Pulse stepped forward with an expression best described as child-like glee. The hero stood atop the now unconscious thief's earthen prison and crouched before grabbing a fist full of the man's hair to yank his head up a bit, "YOU GOT KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT, SON!" he said before releasing his grip and falling onto his rear to laugh for a few moments. Once the humor had passed, Pulse stood once more and wiped a tear from his eye "Ah...man, that shit was priceless. Nice work Mirage, good to see you really took those lessons to heart. However..." he lightly punching Mirage where her bruise was, "Still gotta remember not to call out your injuries." Pulse playfully jeered before shoving his hands into his pockets. With the thieves apprehended and authorities likely on their way for clean up, Pulse nodded his head towards the direction that the thieves had been running from, "So, how 'bout we go get some burgers? I'm seriously craving a one pounder with a fried egg on top, maybe a chocolate sha-" "You're just going to up and leave after blowing a hole in the boardwalk!?" a shrill voice cried out.

Pulse's brow raised again as he turned to see a woman in her late thirties marching towards him, "You can't just do that! You need to fix the damage you caused, right now!", Pulse's eyes narrowed, "Lady, do I look like a damned carpenter to you? I'm sure the city'll have it fixed soon.", "With OUR tax money!", "Ok, one: i'm sure YOUR tax money isn't specifically being used to fix that hole, and two: I pay taxes too.". The woman looked incredulously at Pulse for a moment, "YOU pay taxes? With what money? I don't see you working anywhere around town unless you consider blowing things up working.". Pulse sneered at her for a few moments, "Hit it right on the head actually. I destroy buildings scheduled for demolition. Good job actually, I get paid for a full shift even though i'm done in a half hour at the most.". Pulsed relished the woman's expression as she opened and closed her mouth in an attempt to make a rebuttal, "I also made a few investments in the stock market. Tricky business but I got a guy in jump city that keeps me posted on the important stuff. Now,if you'll excuse me, i'm going to get me a fuckin' burger.". Without a word further, Pulse turned on his heel and began walking away. Everything he'd said just now was indeed the truth; he'd acquired a fairly simple job with a wrecking crew and invested in the stock market to continue having a steady cash flow, however, he'd failed to mention just who kept him up to date and how he'd acquired enough money to buy a share. That would be a secret he'd keep to the grave.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Mirage said nothing to the woman at first. She only tightened her hand on her weapon when the woman began to yell. Once she realized that the woman was just angry and not at all dangerous, she let Pulse handle it in his own way. Once Pulse was storming off, she approached the woman and bowed politely.

"Ma'am, I do understand your concern, but I believe you would be a bit more disappointed if no one were to frequent the boardwalk at all, for fear of being robbed. Wood is replaceable. People's trust... is not." She inclined her head in a polite nod. "Besides, I have researched. The city has it's own insurance against 'battle damage'. Many cities with active heroes go this route for this purpose. It will not fall to your pockets. Do try to have a nice day." She turned as well, with much less annoyance than Pulse had. Halfway out of earshot, she turned and called over her shoulder.

"Perhaps sit on the beach and listen to the sea. It will calm you if you listen to it." With that, she ran off to get to Pulse.

"Burgers sound good, my friend." She had no idea how Pulse managed stocks. To be honest, that was still a concept that was foreign to her. It had taken her long enough to understand the concept of money. However, she had her own income, one that Pulse didn't know about. Their house was large enough that they could have their own private spaces. Sometimes Kassy was not in hers...

[MonsieurShade]

"To the burger shack then..." Pulse grunted softly in response to Mirage approving his idea. He'd already been in a bad enough mood for having his meal ended before it could even begin, however being yelled at when he'd taken what was -for him- the least destructive course of action to stop a criminal simply soured it further. He'd come a long way since starting in jump city; he was easily two times less brutal than he was as a teen, and had gained a lot more patience and experience in regards to complaints, still, it was a bit irksome now and then to have to deal with people who had no clue how much damage he could really cause. Dimitri let out a sigh and popped a few vertebrae in his neck to relieve some stress, "Oh, before I forget again, remind me to grab a small carton of eggs from the grocery store. Regis is getting a bit round in the midsection, I figure I should give him a bit more protein instead of fatty mice and crickets nonstop.".

[Mistress Dizzy]

"Just a moment." Stepping into the shadows of a building, Mirage let out a slow exhale, and activated a spell on her staff. The whole thing lit with vibrant life, and then it vanished out of sight. So did her costume, leaving her in a yellow sundress printed with little dolphins. Her hair was black instead of white- that was an illusion of it's own. Kassy loved her white hair, but Dimitri had pressed her to disguise herself better. She had a unique look; people would come after her and she wasn't as nearly lethal as he was.

She stepped out, rubbing her hand gently. "Better. I will remind you of the eggs, and I need some fresh fish, myself." She liked the grocery markets. Imagine someone taking the time to clean and gut the fish before selling it! Humans were very innovative. "Oh, and those little sweet-grapes with the juice inside." The grapes she was used to were dark, and sun-dried with spices.

[MonsieurShade]

Pulse waited for a bit to allow Mirage to don her secret identity before continuing onwards, amused expression worming its way onto his face rather than the near perpetual scowl, "You sure do love fish Kas'. I'm pretty sure i've never seen someone eat so much seafood in my life." Dimitri said as he and he kept a brisk pace. As they came upon the burger shack Dimitri could see that the third thief from earlier was still right where he left him. The man was face down and groaning in pain, his right hand was shredded pretty badly and his knees were bent in ways human knees simply were not meant to bend. The cause of his injuries was none other that Pulse, who had taken exception to having a gun pointed in his face when he went to intercept the thieves. Being that the unconscious man was the only one to have a gun, Dimitri had remedied the situation by blowing the weapon up before blasting him in the knees as well much to the horror of his comrades. "So, this place still open for business or will I be looking for chow elsewhere?" Dimitri barked to a waiter as he stepped over the injured man and swung open the door.

"Well...we were going to close while we waited for the police to come and file a report, but-" "I'll take that to mean you guys are still open. And would'ja look at that, a bunch of seats opened up." Dimitri said before stepping out of the way to allow Kassy to walk in first. True to Dimitri's word there were now several empty booths and tables; a result of people either fleeing or following after Pulse after he'd left to pursue the escaping thieves-to-be.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Kassy resisted the urge to roll her eyes at Pulse's rudeness. She didn't say anything about it, though. It could wait until they were in private- if she even thought it worth it by that time. It was an argument they'd had more than a few times, about his personality and treatment of people. He didn't think anything of it, but she always had.

She'd never explained to him just why his sharp attitude bothered her. She'd gotten more confident due to his training, but sometimes she felt like he'd laugh at her if she told him certain things. Or worse, he'd treat her just as he did everyone else...

"I think it would be easier to cook at home, don't you, Dimitri?"

[MonsieurShade]

"You serious Kas'? It took me nearly half an hour to get a seat!" Dimitri said as he turned to look at his partner, an action that he regretted almost instantly. Kassy had that look again, the one that silently spelled out her displeasure towards his antics. Dimitri may have had Kassy beat in all physical aspects, but he'd only managed to beat her in a verbal battle twice much to his displeasure. Not feeling up for another tongue lashing, Dimitri let out an exaggerated sigh and released the door, "Fine, i'm more in the mood for lamb chops anyway. Guess i'll pick up some from the store and throw 'em on the grill when we get back.". As if to let Kassy know he'd likely continue badgering her about this later, Dimitri gave another exaggerated sigh and started walking whilst the waiter inside mouth a silent "thank you" to Kassy.

Dimitri fully intended to give Kassy a hard time for making him forgo his burger, however as with anytime that occurred he'd end his fussing quickly and go back to acting as if it had never happened. Were it anyone else, Dimitri would hold onto his annoyance like a starving dog would a bone, but the fact that Kassy was one half of the two people that were capable of tolerating Pulse for more than five minutes went a long way. He'd even go so far as to call Kassy his closest friend albeit after some pestering, and even then the confession would be done begrudgingly.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Kassy gave a quick smile to the waiter inside, and she followed after Dimitri. "I like it better when you cook anyway. Sometimes the restaurant food is so plain." She could tell he was upset with her. Having lived a good part of her life learning to read people, she was excellent at interpreting body language and vocal tone.

"Besides that, I'm sure Regis is missing us. Let us go shopping and I will help you cook. Perhaps I'll make those cookies you like?" Once she'd been taught to manage the stove, Kassy had discovered an interest in baking. While she was good at breads, she much preferred cookies and small cakes. Her favorite was sea salt choco cookies. The touch of salt went well with rich chocolate, and Kassy had a bit of a sweet tooth.

"I have some things to do tonight. You can keep the city from destruction, right?" There was a softly joking tone to her voice. Gently she was trying to coax Dimitri back to happiness. As happy as he got, anyway.

[MonsieurShade]

"Uh huh..." Dimitri grunted as he took a sharp left to take him off of the boardwalk and towards the city streets where the corner market was located. His was still sore about the burger, but not nearly as much as he made it seem.

Dimitri's ears perked at the mention of Kassy potentially baking her signature cookies, though he refused to turn around lest his expression potentially betray how much he really liked the idea. From the very moment Dimitri introduced her to the world of ovens, he knew he'd unleashed something both terrible and wonderful. Despite being a living reactor Dimitri felt as though every time he took a bite of the salty sweet confections that he would have to work out at least twice as hard as he usually did the next day. The hero mulled this over for a few seconds, if he accepted that meant that he'd have to drop the grudge, not to mention he'd have to have some self control about how many he ate, and-"A dozen cookies when we get home and another when you get back from whatever you're doing tonight and we're square.". Shit. His stomach, having been deprived of lunch had seized control of his mouth before he could finish thinking.

Still, it wasn't a bad deal by Dimitri's standards. The prospect of more cookies when Kassy came back from whatever it was that she occasionally did at night would at least keep Dimitri from intentionally crippling someone for fear of Kassy finding out and denying him his baked goods. Dimitri found himself wondering not for the first time what Kassy did when she left out, and had even asked once only for the subject to be changed and ultimately dropped. In the end he decided it was best not to pry.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Kassy let out a bright giggle, pleased that she'd won the spat. "Two dozen. Agreed." She gave Pulse a quick hug, and then went down the street toward the market, humming.

After shopping, buying eggs, fish, and all sorts of baking ingredients, they headed home. Kassy got to work right away, and soon was stirring up a batch of heavenly smelling batter. She'd never be able to thank Dimitri enough for teaching her to cook. They traded off making dinner every week, but the desserts were left to her. Her greatest challenge so far had been a proper cheesecake (hers seemed to come out dry) and keeping him from sneaking fingerfuls of batter from the bowl.

"Dima? Perhaps I should get a pet of my own. What would you think of that?" While she got along well with Regis, sometimes she wished she had her own little companion. What that would be, she honestly had no idea.

[MonsieurShade]

Dimitri smirked in satisfaction as Kassy agreed to the amount of cookies to be baked, however the smirk was lost and quickly replaced with a much less than dignified squeak as Dimitri found himself being hugged. As he'd followed after her, Dimitri had made a mental note to work her twice as hard during the next training session for that. A quick -and thankfully uneventful- shopping trip later, and they were right back home. After chucking a few whole eggs into Regis' feeding dish and washing his hands, Dimitri had wasted virtually no time getting out onto the back deck and getting the grill ready.

The sudden shift in plans had meant that Dimitri hadn't gotten the chance to soak the wood chips in apple cider in the fridge overnight like he usually would have, however dicing up some apples and adding them to the wood worked just as well if he truly had to compromise. After adding in some onions to the wood as well for flavor, Dimitri started the fire and turned his attention to the lamb. Whilst rubbing them in a combination of salt, pepper, and garlic powder Dimitri overheard Kassy's question and scowled as his face flushed in response to the nickname. He would have complained long ago where it not for the fact that he knew he'd be a hypocrite for often referring to Kassy as 'Kas', and instead once more swallowed his pride and mulled over Kassy's inquiry, "I suppose we could get you something of your own. We'd have to be careful to make sure it's something Regis couldn't eat, or at least make it too hard to get to.".

As if on queue, Regis -whom had followed Pulse outside for some sun- crawled from his impromptu sunning spot on one of the deck's pieces of lawn furniture and began to climb up Dimitri's leg. He patiently waited until Regis had clambered up to his back before carrying the platter of chops over to the grill and tossing them on. The meat sizzled and popped a bit, eliciting a grin from Dimitri as he grabbed a bowl of glaze he'd set on one of the grill's racks and began to swipe over the meat as it cooked. There were few things that made Pulse legitimately happy, however the bourbon glaze that his grandmother had taught him to make was definitely one of those things. As far as he was concerned, it was a thing of beauty; made from a combination of dark and light brown sugar, a dash of worcestershire and soy sauce, and some honey bourbon that he'd convinced one of his older coworkers to purchase for him. Dimitri left half of the sauce in the bowl for when the lamb chops where done, and closed the grill. As Regis finally clambered atop Dimitri's shoulders, Dimitri debated whether or not to go back inside to wait, however ultimately opted not to, figuring that he'd more than likely be pushed right back out by Kassy to ensure the safety of the cookie dough she was preparing.

[Mistress Dizzy]

Kassy inhaled the scent of grilling meat. It was something she never knew she enjoyed until she moved in with Dmitri, who was almost completely carnivorous. While Kassy did love her seafood, it was nice to be introduced to new things. She'd even looked up recipes for grilled vegetables. Whatever Dima put on the meat went quite well with the vegetables as well. Between his cooking and her baking, they both had to work hard to keep the pounds where they needed to be.

Once the cookies were safely baking, she went outside and handed the mostly empty dough bowl to Dmitri. There were still small bits of sweet dough clinging to it. She made a bit extra because she knew he liked it. It was silly, perhaps, or too sentimental, like he was always bothering her about. But-- Kassy liked to see Dmitri smile. It was a rare treat.

After giving Dmitri the bowl and giving Regis a fond rubbing on his back, she went to her room. It was at the other end of the house, and it had wood furniture and plenty of small decorations. Seashells, bits of coral, and brightly colored cloth from her homeland were all about. Instead of a bed, there was a wide pool set into the floor, about the size of a Jacuzzi. It was filled with fresh seawater, and Kassy slept there.

While the cookies baked, Kassy washed and packed a small bag with what she'd need for the night. She put on a few bits of jewelry, as well as a bit of makeup she'd learned to do from a book. When the lovely scent of freshly melted chocolate started to waft through the house, she returned and got the cookies out, placing them on a cooling rack. "Dima, they're almost ready!"

[MonsieurShade]

Dimitri nodded to Kassy and graciously accepted the bowl she offered with with a barely repressed smile. The smell of baking cookies as well as the cooking pork chops made him feel as though he'd go wild with hunger, though from which dish he knew not. Dimitri waited for Kassy to leave his line of sight before he swiped the interior of the bowl with his finger, gathering up as much dough as he could in one go before popping it into his mouth. The salty sweet flavor mingled in Dimitri's a way that could only be described as euphoric, almost to the point where Dimitri wondered if he could sneak in and snatch a cookie from the oven while Kassy wasn't looking. It was a good idea in theory seeing as his robotic hand could easily withstand the heat, however the practice would likely be met with pain when he went to take a bite of the hot confection. Dimitri set the cookie dough bowl down on the patio table that was frequently used for dining both by Kassy and himself, and once in a blue moon Gizmo or one of the other H5 members on the exceedingly rare occasion that they were in the city on "business". After swiping his finger across his pants, Dimitri opened the grill back up and turned the lamp chops with his metallic hand, checking to ensure each one had been cooked just right. Those that were still more bloody than Dimitri would have liked where simply swept over with a bit of raw energy from his palm.

After a few more minutes of waiting the lamb was finally ready to be removed from the grill. They were all still a bit rare, but Dimitri didn't mind, and Kassy seemed to practically adore her meats to be a bit more pink in the middle. After placing each lamb chop on the platter he'd brought out with him, Dimitri gave each one a once over with the glaze for a second time, pausing only long enough to blow air at Regis' eye to keep the prying lizard away from the food. "Chops are done Kas! We still got some salad left in the fridge from last night, right?"

[Mistress Dizzy]

"Yes, there is!" She got it from the fridge, where it was contained tightly in a bowl so the vegetables wouldn't wither. It had lots of lettuce and spinach, some sliced tomatoes and carrots, and these green things that Dima called cucumbers. She didn't think they were, at least they didn't taste like that where she came from. Still, it tasted very nice, so she couldn't complain. She brought the salad and four of the still-hot cookies out to the patio table, setting them both down.

Easing herself into a chair, she looked out at the sea and inhaled. The scent of the sea gave her peace. This, with Dimitri, was home, but something in her always felt uneasy. There wasn't a name for it that she knew. Briefly, she wondered if Dimitri would notice her makeup and jewelry, and make a question of it. But she dismissed the thought quickly. He'd never notice. He never did.

Putting plates on the table and filling them halfway with salad, she put a bottle of dressing and the four cookies down. With a faint sigh, pleased sigh, she watched Dima finish up the lamb.