The Tell-tale Spam (Tell a spooky story one sentence at a time).

[Kel Kannan]

Unfortunately for Richard, the time was now will never be, for he is trapped in his own delusions of time itself

[Dinh AaronMk]

But in doing so, so was everyone else.

[Vilageidiotx]

"Saladin sends his regards" a Saudi prince said to the spectral monarch before running him over with an oil-black Lamborghini.

[gorgenmast]

Cookie Crisp is false advertising because they weren't really cookies and therefore it really wasn't 'cookies for breakfast'.

[Dinh AaronMk]

The old Jew was stunned with this enlightened revelation.

[Vilageidiotx]

"Well, oy me right in the vey." the Jew said, scratching his bald pate.

[Kel Kannan]

Suddenly! a car full of neo-nazis hops the curb and runs down the old Jew.

[Dinh AaronMk]

But he dodges it Matrix style.

[Vilageidiotx]

And the Neo-Nazi's spun out of control and crashed into a nearby soviet union, where they were carted off by a couple of glorious communists.

[Frizan]

"My dick is made of bologna" said a strange man in a mime outfit.

[Kel Kannan]

"Would that be beef or a mixture of chicken, pork, and other left over shit?" asked a man dressed as a nun.

[ClocktowerEchos]

"Is it kosher?" Says the now cross dressing Jew.

[Vilageidiotx]

And the Jew remembered that pork can never be kosher, so he did ten sit-ups for the glory of Yahweh so as to tone for his sins.

[Arawak]

Than the strange man in the mime outfit, critically stunned at the jew's physical prowess melted into a strange liquid on the ground.

[Vilageidiotx]

"Well gefilte me right in the fish." The Jew said, shrugging exponentially.

[rush99999]

Suddenly, an army of pineapples attacked!

[Dinh AaronMk]

The Jew was confused to all hell, he shrank back into the corner and watched as the pineapples entered the fray.

[rush99999]

But just as the pineapples descend on The Jew, the communists from earlier kick down the door and fight the army of tropical fruit in a valiant display of deus ex machina.

[Dinh AaronMk]

And in typical Russian irony, they sing glorious Cossack choir songs as they fight.