A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks between the two and it finally sets in how his life is a joke.
8
likes
7 yrs ago
I honestly don't care what people think of me as long as a mutual respect can be reached to the extent of having fun with RP. :3
9
likes
8 yrs ago
Happy newyears! God save the Queen.
4
likes
Bio
Nothing to see, here.
I mostly find interest in... - Fantasy/medieval - SciFi/Futuristic - (post)Apocalypse scenarios (rarely) - Most combinations of anything on this list
Not a fan of... - Free rp - Most Anime Fandoms/historical/arena/slice-of-life/school
Curious regarding... - Steampunk/nation
Dead RPs I was in Children of Plunder Iron Rose Adventurers Welcome to Wonderland The Marauders The Hole: 1940's magic/noir/anthro The Far Away Land Tales From The Hole The Endless Halls dark fantasy Some non-fantasy space thread? Witch Hunter - Aldergard Transcendent: Darkness Rising (A Sci-Fi Roleplay) The Bloody Embrace: An institution for young killers Swords And Sorcery: The 5th Province Forest of Secrets Demons & Dragons - Act 2 Defenders of Lesavvo's Tomb And those are the ones I bothered to keep track of.
I've got the timeskip written to be about 8 months, so you can say she woke up anytime during that span. As of the most recent post, I think it's been about 2 or 3 weeks since they went into the coma
Ah yeh. The tech question was in regards to steampunk or the like, though I suppose theres a note for that. >_< Are there classes of magic like elements/divine and the like? Also...races? Or are we all human jobbers?
SAL acknowledged Grayson's warning and told the others to dig in to their makeshift trenches. At the mention of his name, Harriet perked up. "Leave Amon to us, we'll take care of him" She waved Kaeci to follow her and began to walk away to another covered position, away from the fighting and just exposed enough to draw Amon's attention.
The troop transports descended about 20 yards away from the heat signatures embedded in the hills. Amon surveyed the situation and quickly decided on orders- 20% of his people would charge their position, 40% would stay back and use the transports as cover, and another 40% would go around to try for a pincer manuever. The doors flew open and his marauders stepped out, with a wave of his fist, they began to attack. As he stepped into the open, his eyes were drawn away from the fight as he spotted a pair of familiar faces, lackeys of the coward Vanderos, and made a beeline towards them.
Feeding off of Harriet's aura, the lightly shimmering distortion of humanoid proportions turned to acknowledge the transport and Amon. With the assault raging, it could have just as easily looked like the ripples of a heat wave refracting muzzle flashes in the distance. However, where there was the plant woman, a shadow often followed, and it was made clear as it spoke. "Ser Amon. Velcome~" Kaeci quietly greeted with a clicking sneer, his subshield serving the purpose of what life support he needed, mostly in the way of recycling air. Their chitinous frame was surprisingly resistant to negative pressure.
Amon drew closer to their position. At just over 7 feet tall, the stone man was certainly an imposing figure. He reached around to his shoulder and pulled loose a shard of his outer layer, he threw it like a spear and in one smooth motion, drew his laser pistol and blasted it, shattering the stone spear into pieces of highly sharp shrapnel that rained down towards Kaeci and Harriet.
Harriet was quick to respond, extending vines from her arm and weaving them into a shield to block the downpour of stone. "He's right on top of us get ready!"
The distortion of Kaeci fluctuated and bent like smoke in ways the human physique could only imagine in the throes of a pitched fever dream. A low cricketing chirp creaked from all angles as the bolt of stone seemed to sail through Kaeci save for how their form bent around it. The contortion was designed to spell an implication of the insect's body having been pulled apart to form a ring which the spike flew through. With shallow wisps of dust kicked up from shrapnel, the blink of shield resonance told of a ricocheting splinter which would have struck true if it weren't for the soldier obviously being prepared for combat. Such intended insult; The Iilusian knight was hardly worth their wings if they could not dodge an attack so blatantly telegraphed by an equally clumsy opponent.
Kicking up dust in a burst of scrambling appendages, Kaeci darted left through the miasma before cartwheeling enough to feint having darted right instead. Rather than remain in Harriet's cover, the insect had darted into the fray under cover of dust and stone to fade into the maelstrom of combat. Exctheis growled to life as it was slowly drawn, Kaeci kneeing back the shell to swiftly plant four capsules into its gullets and snapping its shell into place. Though it felt tasteless to use allies as bait...Kaeci thought nothing more of them other than the opportunity he would take if the stone beast fell for his lack of presence to the extent where it could consider attacking his allies. Chasing ghosts was no better option, as Kaeci could hide as long as it took for the front to fell the nameless creature. It was his game, and instinct held the cards...though he hadn't the slightest clue how to crack his prey's shell.
Harriet drew back her shield of vines. She could feel the stone shards embedded deeply. She rolled with the quick shudder of pain and resolved to use them to her advantage, as Amon stepped into range, she re-aligned the vines into straight lines, the stones becoming like a row of thorns, and thusly, she began to slash and crack them against Amon.
The stones bashed against Amon and crumbled. It was more minor annoyance than damaging blow. Frankly, he was insulted she would try to use bits of his own physiology against him. Neverthless he towered over the petite Hemiplantae and smashed his fist into her with enough force to not only send her sprawling, but crack the brittle and aging layer of skin around his hand.
Though conventional instinct would compel any sensible person to cry out for seeing a comrade being struck, Kaeci remained composed, though skittered forward. Hopping onto a rock for the angle to pounce, the Iilusia lashed out and landed on the broad shoulders of his prey. A swift screech from a bone-like structure that made up fangs skipping against Amon's plating desperately seeking to find a weakness was broken by a wheezing bark. Amon clutched the bug and spiked him into the nearest rock with a crunch of chitin straining from the impact.
Ripples of sickly greenish orange bubbled along his frame, distressed by the impact. Kaeci trembled in response, neurological damage rapidly healing in time with the wash of placid dark tones which faded his broken body into the terrain. Though he needed just a moment, a moment was that need be had.
Harriet struggled to stand back up. She felt that, if not for her armor holding everything together, the punch would've blown her to bits on impact alone. They needed something, anything to give them even the slightest advantage, Amon was simply too strong for either of them to take out. The stone man hadn't noticed her getting back up yet, maybe this would lead to a chance. Time to play dirty.
With a few deft moves, Harriet released the hermetic seal of her suit and shrugged off her greaves and boots, allowing her limbs their maximum range of movement. She snuck up behind Amon and leaped onto his back. Quickly, she began to weave and wrap around him, her arms and legs growing and contorting wildly. Vines shot out from her limbs at all angles, totally ensnaring Amon and rooting him in place. He struggled and nearly managed to shake her off, but she tightened her grips around him by extending vines and thorns that dug in deep but weren't able to fully penetrate through the rocky exoskeleton. For her next trick, she had concocted a highly acidic mixture of poisons and corrosives in her stomach. She craned her neck out over Amon's broad shoulders and violently spewed the concoction all down his front.
"What are you... get off of me!" Amon shouted, struggling in vain to release himself.
Harriet was pushing herself to the limit, she wouldn't be able to keep this up for long, especially as she forced out one final vine to reach around to snatch the plasma pistol from it's holster in the small of her back. The acid she had puked all over him would triple in effectiveness if ignited, particularly the corrosive elements of it.
"Get ready!" Harriet managed to cry out as the vine whipped out in front of Amon and, with the pistol pressed right up against his stomach, pulled the trigger.
The effect was instantaneous, Amon yelled in pain as the flames burst forward and the acid got to work burning through the outer layer of his skin. Not wanting to catch fire herslef, Harriet hastily retracted the vines nearest the burning and released Amon entirely, her limbs starting to retract back to their normal length. Amon could move quicker than he looked. As soon as he had a chance he struck, grabbing one of the remaining vines and pulling Harriet into his grasp. Now it was her who was caught like a fly in the web.
As she struggled aginst his ever-tightening grip, he breathed into her ear. "You've been a real thorn in my side girl, this ends now."
He spun around to face Kaeci and held Harriet aloft, hands wrapped around her torso. He stared down at the Iilusian as he began to squeeze. Harriet yelped helplessly as she felt the life being completely crushed out of her.
"Kaeci..." she gasped as she lost consciousness.
Holding her by the neck now, Amon, a big believer in 'eye for an eye', pulled out his laser pistol, and set it to superheated. As soon as Kaeci made a move, Amon shoved the pistol into her back and fired, the blast erupted out of her abdomen violently as her eyes shot open and she cried out in agony, the laser having set her innards aflame which was slowly starting to consume her. The moment Kaeci made to approach, he tossed her aside to burn and prepared for the incoming attack.
Kaeci's body clicked together, exoskeleton pulled back to taut with tendons. He peeled himself from the rock, adrenaline equivalent flowing through his frame. A quick learner, it was no dishonor to be struck as long as a knight-huntsman could adapt...and the insect that peeled itself from the windshield was no common rigmarole. Such clumsy singular strikes would hardly break the beast...it was simply new, imperfect prey to be studied and exploited for its glaring weaknesses. Though, fortune had a funny way of flipping coins. Kaeci dragged himself back to capacity just in time to watch his fair lady being broken.
Breath held in his vents, slowly lifting a hand in a gesture he'd been taught to mean an attempt to bargain. It was a foolish gesture by his standards, and was a quick way to bleed the tells of a prey's intentions out of them. Genuine, meek, pleading; Kaeci silently watched in grim terror as Amon mercilessly replied by loosing bolts of charged plasma into his companion. The blaze glittered and reflected in the Iilusian's translucent frame which rapidly washed with the mirrored shades of flame before Harriet was cast aside. The monster whose name that Kaeci could barely remember in that instant began was a human vowel assumed a stance that expected something out of his second victim; the Iilusian frozen only for as long as it took to slowly clench their hands to a fist and retract the gesture...Kaeci then understood what it was to look like a fool.
A sensible person would have run to her aid...or simply run...
Kaeci's eyes snapped open, sharpening to razors aimed to cut Amon down with a hollow stare. Ire? Rage? Such volatile vitriol that made up terms for emotions that Iilusians were foreign to did no justice to describe the animal that returned the pirate's focus.
...there was nothing 'sensible' left in the insect's soulless eyes.
Kaeci deftly charged as if being puppeteered in their scrambling gait, unable to propel themselves any faster. Their right arm parting, the three-fingered section drawing Exctheis from his sling while the bottom two digits retrieved a capsule from the bandolier. Black specks of eyes wide, Kaeci darted in, catching themselves on a heel and leaning back just out of reach as Amon swung a serrated club-like arm. In the motion, the tri-fingered section of his other arm took hold of the living armamant's shell to level it at Amon's face.
A resounding bark, than another, and another as bumps of concentrated bursts of focused light bit into the rock-man's eyes. They swung back, following up with the murderous blaster in their literally blind rage to give the Iilusian the same grease but meeting only wind while Kaeci fell to his shoulders. Swiftly pulling back Exctheis' shell, he slotted the two capsules down its gullets before propping himself up on the now free arm sections and jabbing the living weapon into Amon's weakened plating.
Thump after thump, the now remaining five rounds bit into the murderer's flesh to complete the job Harriet had started to the point of leaving the section nearly molten slag. However, this simply would not do to simply hear the inhuman roars of anguish while Amon's liquid flesh seared his innards, beneath. Kaeci stood, tossing the now fed weapon to the side just in time to catch a flailing arm to the chest. Chitinous plates groaned from the strike, though he held on until the backswing left him in a crouching position back where he started only a little worse for wear.
At about this point, the glint of shielding sang itself to life on neural command, Kaeci swiftly drawing 'Sandcastle' and letting out a balefully monstrous howl before punching the weapon into the glowing plating. Shielding barked and rippled from the heat and pressure in time to the muffled coughs of the armament being unleashed inside Amon. Quickly, melting metal forced the bubbling coughs of steam to give way to startlingly shrill bell-like chimes increasing in timbre.
Amon's abdomen burst like a bubble, spilling molten guts and shrapnel from an exploded gun onto the ground, having been shredded from the inside. Kaeci remained standing, a weak crackling rising from the arm which separated at the elbow to follow the pirate to the ground as their eviscerated body lifelessly crumbled to the ground.
There came a moment of stillness with the Iilusian standing motionless over the convulsing gore of the prestigious corpse. His frame undulated before he bent back to let out a tortured cry of anguish akin to asserting a fistful of rusty nails onto a chalkboard, accented with a misty cloud emanating from their mouth. The air was pervaded with a sour acrid stench of aerosolized venom, Kaeci's flesh washing a myriad of deep crimsons washed with sickly greens and tortured light blues.
Snapping back to what seemed like ingrained intent, the wretched screech stopped as quickly as it started, and he turned on a heel to dart off towards where Harriet had landed. His remaining split arm roamed her face and shoulders, feeling around as he shuddered. After a momentary pause, he delicately drew his small hooked knife.
You see...not many could imagine what an animal dreams of. Monsters? Monsters are simply animals feared or respected by cowards, fools or monsters alike. Breaking the ground to melt sand, harnessing coiled batteries to make weapons to kill each other over territory, monsters are the ones the 'sane' and 'intelligent' call themselves to protect their precious dignity.
Holding Harriet's face with three digits, the remaining secondary appendage snipped a small collection of the greenest foliage off her head as Kaeci's face contorted and he sank his face into her neck. She was asleep and would feel nothing, even so to ease the tortured rest of her unconsciousness. There would be no way to tell what actually killed the woman, though the slowly browning complexion of her wilting body rapidly increased at this moment...eased out by a final gentle sigh.
Kaeci pulled away and ripped a capsule from his bandolier open to dump a slug out before delicately tucking the clippings away and resealing the container. Staring with an indiscernible emotion at the still green fronds and fibers within the small clear pod, the Iilusian let out a long, soft hiss. Their frame dully faded into jaggedly rippling translucency, having apparently forgotten about their lost section of an arm.
@Samdragonx Well, 'male pronouns' doesn't mean 'male'. -or it could. I was careful not to use gender-specific pronouns in the CS for that reason. Matagame stuff. I just can't bring myself to write non-specifying connotative pronouns for every single IC post. So, for simplicity, male pronouns until further notice. Yay androgyny?
The hiders inside hiders is just to cut down on space so people aren't just hit with a text wall and are free to read what they wish whenever they so please. :P Idk, I just like hiders.
EDIT: *Tosses quarter into the 'using the same word in a sentence twice' jar*
Nothing to see, here.
[B][u]I mostly find interest in...[/u][/b]
- Fantasy/medieval
- SciFi/Futuristic
- (post)Apocalypse scenarios (rarely)
- Most combinations of anything on this list
[b][u]Not a fan of...[/u][/b]
- Free rp
- Most Anime Fandoms/historical/arena/slice-of-life/school
[b][u]Curious regarding...[/u][/b]
- Steampunk/nation
[u][B]Dead RPs I was in[/b][/u]
[color=gray][s]Children of Plunder[/s]
[s]Iron Rose Adventurers[/s]
[s]Welcome to Wonderland[/s]
[s]The Marauders[/s]
[s]The Hole: 1940's magic/noir/anthro[/s]
[s]The Far Away Land[/s]
[s]Tales From The Hole[/s]
[s]The Endless Halls dark fantasy[/s]
[s]Some non-fantasy space thread?[/s]
[s]Witch Hunter - Aldergard[/s]
[s]Transcendent: Darkness Rising (A Sci-Fi Roleplay)[/s]
[s]The Bloody Embrace: An institution for young killers[/s]
[s]Swords And Sorcery: The 5th Province[/s]
[s]Forest of Secrets[/s]
[s]Demons & Dragons - Act 2[/s]
[s]Defenders of Lesavvo's Tomb[/s]
And those are the ones I bothered to keep track of.[/color]
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IdMp-H9vhA&list=RD6IdMp-H9vhA[/youtube]
[center][hider=Why can't my arms hold all these bunnehs!?][img]http://pre00.deviantart.net/8722/th/pre/i/2015/303/e/9/58_by_deadmanjackalope-d9expi4.png[/img]
I like rabbits...shut up! ;>_>[/hider][/center]
<div style="white-space:pre-wrap;">Nothing to see, here.<br><br><span class="bb-b"><span class="bb-u">I mostly find interest in...</span></span><br>- Fantasy/medieval<br>- SciFi/Futuristic<br>- (post)Apocalypse scenarios (rarely)<br>- Most combinations of anything on this list<br><br><span class="bb-b"><span class="bb-u">Not a fan of...</span></span><br>- Free rp<br>- Most Anime Fandoms/historical/arena/slice-of-life/school<br><br><span class="bb-b"><span class="bb-u">Curious regarding...</span></span><br>- Steampunk/nation<br><br><span class="bb-u"><span class="bb-b">Dead RPs I was in</span></span><br><font color="gray"><span class="bb-s">Children of Plunder</span><br><span class="bb-s">Iron Rose Adventurers</span><br><span class="bb-s">Welcome to Wonderland</span><br><span class="bb-s">The Marauders</span><br><span class="bb-s">The Hole: 1940's magic/noir/anthro</span><br><span class="bb-s">The Far Away Land</span><br><span class="bb-s">Tales From The Hole</span><br><span class="bb-s">The Endless Halls dark fantasy</span><br><span class="bb-s">Some non-fantasy space thread?</span><br><span class="bb-s">Witch Hunter - Aldergard</span><br><span class="bb-s">Transcendent: Darkness Rising (A Sci-Fi Roleplay)</span><br><span class="bb-s">The Bloody Embrace: An institution for young killers</span><br><span class="bb-s">Swords And Sorcery: The 5th Province</span><br><span class="bb-s">Forest of Secrets</span><br><span class="bb-s">Demons & Dragons - Act 2</span><br><span class="bb-s">Defenders of Lesavvo's Tomb</span><br>And those are the ones I bothered to keep track of.</font><br><br><iframe src="//youtube.com/embed/6IdMp-H9vhA?theme=dark" frameborder="0" width="496" height="279" allowfullscreen></iframe><br><br><div class="bb-center"><div class="hider-panel"><div class="hider-heading"><button type="button" class="btn btn-default btn-xs hider-button" data-name="Why can't my arms hold all these bunnehs!?">Why can't my arms hold all these bunnehs!? [+]</button></div><div class="hider-body" style="display: none"><img src="http://pre00.deviantart.net/8722/th/pre/i/2015/303/e/9/58_by_deadmanjackalope-d9expi4.png" /><br>I like rabbits...shut up! ;>_></div></div></div></div>