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13 days ago
Current trying to find the "golden ratio" of weed and ozempic to cause my appetite to stack overflow and reactivate the long-dormant photosynthesis gene from that 50% of DNA we share with plants. will update
3 likes
1 mo ago
many people dont know this but a good cue for deadlifting is to bring your chest up and lock your lats for proper spinal stability. this also applies to interacting with gorillas i'm told. testing no—
2 likes
3 mos ago
yeah i work in area 51, it's pretty chill. usually you just get a tweaker roll by on a "spiritual journey" once a month. they tend to go away once you put a few AIM-9s downrange on their flying saucer
2 likes
4 mos ago
man is closest to god after an ice cold beer in the warm shower. his mind and body are freed. next closest is behind the wheel in a scool zone, also with an ice cold beer in hand. study this well.
3 likes
5 mos ago
yeah mom its me can you come pick me up me and the boys were wondering if pulling a potato peeler over tommy's behelit would wake up the little guy in there and it started screaming.. thanks love you

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"Of course, Sir Jarde. I've got you." Segremors inclined his head to the young man as he approached with the question. "Though I would guess we might simply proceed on foot from here in the first place. We haven't much further we can ride."

A fellow rookie amongst the Iron Roses, Jarde was likely the youngest amongst them that was not the Captain herself, and an oddity much like her. The weapons he carried were exotic in the utmost, and his persona seemed that of a carefree jokester— Privately, Gerard had to admit that he would have expected the boy to be amongst his former fellow swords-for-hire as opposed to a Knightly Order.

"First time?"

Even so, a comrade was a comrade. And he recognized what this comrade was processing. He'd seen the look on his face often in greenhorns. It would be important if he got an idea of where his head was at now, before they began their main assault.

@PaulHaynek
Ryuji Igarashi - Traffic Jam - District 19

@Krayzikk@1Charak2

As much as Ryuji wanted to not abandon someone to confronting an unknown enemy like this, he understood that there wasn't anything more he could offer to Sieglinde but his cooperation. When you were on the power scale of ripping signposts out of the ground, a normal level of strength would just be getting in the way. Doubly so since it seemed to only have eyes for her in the first place.

"On it," he said through grit teeth as the pain in his skull mounted, sliding her glasses into the collar of his shirt for the time being, "It's out front, right?"

Her place wasn't too far from here. If he really hustled, he could make it there in a minute or two. It wasn't as if anyone else lived by there—

The pressure redoubled. He felt like something was about to crack, he felt like his eyes were gonna explode! What was he still doing here!? He needed to get the damn bike so they could get out of here!

He turned to leave, free hand clutching at his temples, as Siegliende's voice changed beneath the screams into something different, something with a layer beneath, something awe-inspiring...

And with one final shriek that heralded a wave of torment anew,

"...It's gone."

The apparition passed, and with it, Ryuji's urge to vomit from the vice upon his skull. That had to be what cluster headaches felt like... Terrible. It just compounded and compounded until it damn near drove him insane. If he hadn't already experienced a portion of it, if he hadn't already been given a task to focus on, Ryuji wasn't quite sure he wouldn't have. Still, though, what an anticlimax.

Or...

"Think that's it?" he asked the blonde, who looked for all the world to be ready to take on giants. "Knowing our luck, knowing this town... It'll hit us again later, won't it?"
And may these sinners be granted eternal life, should death prove due penance.

He had counted Paladin Tyaethe's swift advance as enough acknowledgement of his idea, following closely behind himself. While she was assisting Sir Jarde, the younger knight had busied himself with mopping up what remnants tried to break off the from the front and flee— a pair of skirmishers who liked their chances of getting past him better than they did as prisoners of the Iron Rose.

Swiping down with a sharp, chopping motion, Gerard rid most of the blood from his blade as he returned to the group proper, eyeing the prisoners the knights had taken before glancing back over his shoulder to the felled pair further up.

They did not stand down when I gave them the opportunity.

It was unfortunate, but wishing their souls' absolution was all the mercy he could have afforded them. They had resolved to keep fighting, and he had orders and cause to let none escape. While sparing someone was a virtuous act, there were limits before it became a ruinous one. This... would have been crossing those. No way out. The Iron Rose stood for Justice and Mercy. When Mercy was not taken, the hammer of Justice fell.

No time was then for deliberation, and no time was now for doubt.

This was how things were. Spare those who are willing to be spared, swiftly deal with those who were not and render them no threat to yourself, your own, or your protectorate.

Now then, for checkups after battle. He remembered the order of operation that had been drilled into him for a warfighter's attending to needs— Horse, Harness, Man.

"Horse" was simple in this case— Quite literally just a horse, but in the terms of the mantra it referred to one's method of travel. Had they been in a caravan, for instance, or using a wagon, the knights would first want to ensure their mobility was not hampered. Gerard, luckily, found nothing along those lines— his Rouncey had been trained well, neither spooking nor running off and getting himself injured in the melee that had ensued.

"Glad you're safe, my friend."

Onto "Harness". His gear. The sword had made it through unscathed, and only needed more thorough cleaning— which he set to work on as he retrieved a rag from his saddle. As for the rest of him, he had come out of the fight unscathed, luckily enough. They were untrained warriors, true, but that the lone bolt from the trees had buried itself in his pauldron as opposed to his neck was fortunate indeed. A firm yank tore it free, leaving a slightly warped hole in the metal. He would need it repaired after this, but for now...

Raising, rotating, and swinging the arm in a wide circle, he was satisfied that it did not alter his range of motion all too much. He could swing his sword just fine.

"Man", then. Was he well?

A bit of pain on the aforementioned shoulder, likely no more than bruising. His thudding heart had calmed, his breath had fully returned to him. He could think, he could speak, he could fight. He expected to be no less capable in any of these before or after a culling of untrained bandits such as this. Nothing from the skirmish would affect him in the main battle.

He was ready, then. He met the passing gaze of yet another of his fellows, Sir Jerel, who seemed to be lost as to what they were expected to do next. For Gerard, it was simply answered.

"Onwards, I imagine."

@jdh97
Slasher Movie? You mean this won't eventually deteriorate into Generation Kill with Swords?
that's bonus points


End them rightly.
ending them rightly was the correct move in each engagement, Gerard knew his fellows could manage to take one prisoner
girls have cooties ill pass bro
@Virgil If he offers the momentum, it’s only polite to take it
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