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21 days ago
Current yeah i work in area 51, it's pretty chill. usually you just get a tweaker roll by on a "spiritual journey" once a month. they tend to go away once you put a few AIM-9s downrange on their flying saucer
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2 mos ago
man is closest to god after an ice cold beer in the warm shower. his mind and body are freed. next closest is behind the wheel in a scool zone, also with an ice cold beer in hand. study this well.
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3 mos ago
yeah mom its me can you come pick me up me and the boys were wondering if pulling a potato peeler over tommy's behelit would wake up the little guy in there and it started screaming.. thanks love you
4 mos ago
they should let me into the presidential debates as like a stage hazard. i should be like the negligent drivers in onett, plowing into whichever seniors don't heed the warning that i'm coming
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5 mos ago
frantically flipping through my notebook as i realize i'm late for my monthly bit. bomb. bomb. caesium capsule meets stomach lining. bomb. murder confession. bomb. need new material before they bomb m
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Gerard Segremors

@VahkiDane@VitaVitaAR

Sir Sergio, of course, was right on the money.

To begin with, Gerard knew he wasn't going to be able to hide that fact from his fellows, most of whom already were privy to his story— and as such, he knew it to be a waste of energy to be disquieted over it. With a wan, almost wry smirk, he nodded, breathing in to speak—

"Aaaah, good Sir Knights!"

"Ah, how exciting!"

A pair of high, shrill voices killed the words before they could leave his throat, as a trio of girls that seemed younger than the Captain, younger than even his littlest sister, surged forth from the dispersed spread of partygoers as though a bolt from the blue. In a rush, they were upon he and his companion, eagerly crowding around and pelting them with questions that were every bit emblematic of their ages...

Yet in the crisp, posh tenor of their voices as they did so, he could hear their true nature. Were he surrounded like this on the field of battle, he would most likely die, even if he took two or all three with him by way of viciously earned experience and strength. Surrounded as he was now, by these non-threatening children of clearly noble stock...

He leaned back at the sudden rush for a mere moment, eyebrows high, as though recoiling away from the words.

It took nearly the same steel to level his all-too-meager preparation for this moment to the task at hand. It was ironic, a man of the sword who walked the line between life and death in as cavalier a manner as he feeling a pang of worry now, of all times. In some respects, he preferred the odds of a veteran soldier against death than a newly-bloomed Rose against their expectations of gallantry.

He glanced to Sir Sergio, hiding a plea for help beneath his moment of surprise, but found in the Knight of the Harvest Moon's stead a stranger. His body had all at once changed, as though a new role in courtly manner had filled it where reservation once stood guard. He was open, smiling bright, brimming with dramatism, playful cheek. A new side of his fellow, who had always seemed enigmatic... no, not quite right. There was something else there, something he couldn't place.

Gerard then caught the glance sent his way, and completed the breath that had been interrupted.

However briefly, he had been prepared for this.

I am a mercenary no longer. I'm a knight. A greenhorn in the Roses, but no longer am I trudging through dust and smoke without even a face to call my own— How lucky I am that we've only just ridden in from an adventure that's worth retelling.

Time to put it to use.

"Indeed," he breathed, slipping into an invitingly warm smile as he shoved aside rebellious, doubtful thoughts. He cast his free hand, gloved palm skyward, in the other knight's direction. "Forgive me, young misses. As I was just telling my brother in arms, this ball is my first— to whom might I have the pleasure of meeting?"

To hell with it. He initially had worried he'd trip over himself and overdo an introduction, but with Sergio here, he was sure he'd pale in comparison. The blonde pair's exuberance and whimsy was palpable, he doubted anything short of actively insulting them would make a necessarily bad impression— but their companion, the girl in black, seemed to want little to do with any of this.

Familiar, that. He had to agree.

Still, he wouldn't find himself troubled by a little youthful exasperation. Even if he did, he knew not to let it show upon his face. To make them feel a burden was unacceptable, so for all his trepidation at being here, at doing this, he would weather it for all their sakes. To answer their pleas was a knight's duty.

So, with a smile that was far less saccharine but no less polite, he spoke again, eyes casting themselves over the group as a whole.

"And my friend, that was but one enemy, however he may have towered over us before the Captain and I struck him down. I'm told you slaughtered a dozen."

That all said—

Sergio, you're not getting out of this either.
Gerard Segremors


In lockstep, two dozen figures marched down the polished walkways of marble beneath the evening sun, the tawny hues of orange, pink, and gold each a parting gift from Lady Reon. At their head was, of course, the diminutive but nevertheless tightly controlled frame of Knight-Captain Fanilly Danbalion. She had hand-picked them each, representing knights veteran and newfound alike for the festivities that had been all but foisted onto them. With only a day's preparation they had done well to assort themselves in this dignified, orderly manner.

Halfway down the right flank, one such knight's eyes wandered high in a familiar path for a moment, casting their gilded gaze up to the high Spikes that loomed above Thaln's Crown. Their grey and white masonry looked as though cast from ruddy copper or brass, the sunlight caught against their western faces— But when they passed from view, his neck did not crane to trace them as it had in the past.

Instead his posture kept itself to the steady march, chin and shoulders keeping their rightly place. Their approach carried them through the interior keep's verdant, bountiful gardens, bursting with enough natural beauty that not even the throng scattered throughout, guests each as eager and honored as they, could choke. Much like the parade the day prior, his eyes slid over those that caught their arrival with cheers or hushed whispers.

They entered shortly, herald crowing the name and status of each pair that entered. Hearing his own, however briefly and bereft of titles... It was unreal. Quietly, he found himself thankful to be flanked by one of his fellows, someone he could match step with as the knights began to disperse and mingle after their entry. The awe of the moment one's dreams were realized, no matter how much they might prepare themselves for it, may have overwhelmed him otherwise.

Luckily enough, the blur of the hours preceding had left him prepared well enough. As he breathed slowly, regaining control as his long strides guided him towards a nearby arrangement of tables, glasses of burgundy wine festooning them as though rubies. His attire was, at the mercy of one of his seniors, acceptable enough for the occasion. A prompt dragging to the tailor had placed him in a modest black doublet with amber trimming above a white tunic, and tapered black trousers. His hands were gloved rather than gauntleted, an argument that he'd been whittled down from and lost. His boots, however polished they may have been, were the armored pair that he'd worn to battle— an argument he'd whittled his peer down from and won.

The Princess, after all, was expecting to see the arms and armor that had felled the scourge.

Keeping his reserved exterior, he plucked a glass from the table by its narrow stem, swirled it thoughtfully, and took a drink. Social lubricant was here in spades— the tension he felt was likely to break soon as it passed. Sweeping his gaze over the large expanse of the hall, he could see that several of his peers were already well ahead of him on the endeavor.

Dame Cecilia there, looking sharp in a suit akin to his, chatting up a pair of other attendees— one elven, with hair a pale green, and... a lady atop a large spider. Definitely an unheard-of choice of mount, but if the Royal Guards had let it through, he decided he'd not question it any more than politely keeping his distance. If Dame Cecilia wasn't perturbed, then surely he needn't be.

A blink, and a shift of the longsword in his other hand, held safely within its humble scabbard of treated leather. It being somewhere on the longer end of the "hand-and-a-half" scale, wearing it upon the hip would have taken a little much space at the angle he'd need. No skin off his back. It was a comforting weight in his grip like this. Centering. It, too, had seen its blade, guard, and pommel shined.

His eyes panned over to a trinity of his fellow men of the blade— Sirs Renar, Fleuri, and some as-yet-unnamed Crown Knight. The new person aside, for all he respected the pair of his fellow knights in the equation... That was far from a likely mix. Sir Renar, at the very least, made no illusions regarding his opinion of Sir Fleuri, pointedly reminding him of the tournament title he'd relegated to an old shame. How the hell did that one happen?

And yet, they seemed to already be in the midst of swapping stories, heedless of the usual friction.

... This was court, then. Above all, making impressions and connections was paramount here— regardless of who you were on the field, or in the quarters. It was as Dame Serenity said, only a night before. Were he not aware of how deep her knowledge of these affairs went... he'd have considered the young woman prescient; her youth be damned. She was here somewhere too, mingling as either Iron Rose or Arcedeen Scion— and her expectations were still very fresh in his mind.

He took another sip, catching his reflection in the glass for a moment.

His hair was getting long.

As a drying warmth fell down the back of his throat from the dark, tawny red, Gerard allowed himself a smile as a shock of vibrant, blazing scarlet appeared in his peripheral. Of all the things knightly he'd forced himself to absorb, it seemed only fitting that now was when its wild tendency to curl, wave, and spike be tamed. Brushed straight and slicked back, it certainly looked cleaner than normal— for a moment, he hadn't been sure if he recognized himself.

He wondered if the Knight of the Harvest Moon ever felt the same moment, in letting his fall like a wave of fire.

"Sir Sergio."

The glass rose slightly in greeting.

@VahkiDane

Gerard Segremors

@ERode

"Hardly," his glib reply came readily in the wake of her just. "He and I have a good arrangement— he handles the long distances, I handle running into enemy lines. Works great for us both."

Beneath this veneer of flippantness, however, he didn't miss her giving him a similar once-over as he'd done moments ago, starting down at the soil-caked boots and quickly darting across the attire on his frame. Drab and shabby clothing. Understated, putting it mildly, and well-worn. Good for training, if nothing else, and casual enough for a farmboy— but knowing Dame Serenity...

"If you'll have me, I'm all for it. I need to learn the city more thoroughly anyway."

Was she, always polishing and preening and ensuring she put her best foot forward, no matter the circumstance, really fine with it? With the way she was noting down all the run-down fabric, Gerard had his doubts. Not when this was a point on propriety she could hammer home, a teachable moment for the etiquette both knew he lacked. If it came to expectations, he definitely expected her to expect better.

...Still, though.

It was a nice night after a good victory.

Cross the bridge when you come to it.
Gerard Segremors

@ERode

"Speed, Gerard... C'mon, speed!"

For all his worries of unfamiliarity with the city laid before him, Sagramore found that eager strides made short work of the directions given, even in spite of a walk's slower pace. The sun had only just passed its zenith when he'd set forth from the outer gates of Candaeln— and still had plenty of time to weigh upon him like an anvil as he ran. Tucked away from the usual bustle of city life as this hill was, a little grunted self-coaching wouldn't garner many odd looks.

"Agghh...motherfucker." a ragged gasp tore itself from his burning lungs as he crested the hill and fought to keep his urge to keel over locked away.

The concern of recognition from the parade had flickered through his mind after crossing the moat, but it was quickly allayed as he'd stepped into the throng. It was the pomp and circumstance and fantasy that had drawn the eyes— so much of them had affixed onto his unusually polished armor, or more likely the immense trophy he'd been waving around. When it came to his face, he clearly still had no trouble melting into the crowd, even now unmasked.

I guess that's the upside to having so far to go, his stream of consciousness mused, taking thought's place while his heart hammered. Won't be recognized until I'm ready for it.

...

The moment he'd been allotting for rest came and went— and, ever dutiful, he descended the slope to start anew, each step down closer to a jerking catch of the weight than the last.

The day drew on as he continued like this, sun sliding closer and closer to the earth as the knight threw his nose into the grindstone. Each sprint would shorten, each rest would lengthen, but it would not be until the low light matched the amber of his eyes that his will finally relented and listened to the protests of his body.

...

The walk back to Candaeln, given the pounding his calves had been put through, was by necessity a leisurely one. For the first few blocks his legs had felt to be made more of gelatine than bone and sinew, each step being a labor in its own right. Consistent a worker as discipline had forged him into, even he now found himself admitting that his fervor had pushed things... a little hard.

But, that consistency proved a virtue in equal measure— by the time Reon's blazing glory acceded to Mayon's gentler, calmer light in Aimlenn's cloudless air, he could walk normally in spite of the soreness. Recovery came quickly when the conditioning was maintained— a wisdom any proper soldier would have drilled into them first and foremost.

And just as well, too. Rounding a lamplit corner, the flash of a flaxen braid catching the glow was hard enough to miss on its own. His posture, instinctively by now, straightened. The frank, flat appraisal and prim bearing that accompanied were unmistakable, especially when they came from right at eye level.

"And as ever, you're fresh as a daisy, Serenity."

There was no heat on the reply, and a cordial nod followed it quickly. It hadn't taken much time at all within the Order to realize that the young noblewoman was quick to get a read on him— and while he didn't consider himself terribly difficult in such a regard, he had to admit he readily appreciated the honesty she brought with it. A mentor to an unfamiliar world such as knighthood was a blessing, one he dared not overlook.

"Guilty as charged." a humble smile played across his face as he gauged her attire. Casual and light, moreso than he'd usually taken her for— but still carrying her blade on her hip. Smart. You never knew. "Been out on the hills near the wall, running myself ragged. What about you, just on a stroll?"
Gerard Segremors


South from gates. Simple enough.

Destination set, Gerard's steady march saw him float through the grounds of Candaeln at a pace not exactly leisurely, but far from the prior explosions of speed he'd torn through the yard with.

If it overlooked the river, she was probably intent on sending him right by Calnahen's banks, outside of Aimlenn's sturdy walls. Admittedly, Gerard couldn't place the watchtower in question from his memory— in the few times he'd had the privilege to see the city from afar, such as this morning, he was always most drawn by his awe at the immense spires, letting the surrounding farmlands sort of fade into the foreground.

But, her directions had left it clear, even if his sense for the city landmarks was lacking— just get out of the gates and follow the river as it flanked the southern face of Aimlenn. Any idiot could manage that. The watchtower she spoke of would show itself soon, if it were tall enough to appreciably be counted as such. Up on the cliffs, surrounded by a crowding of other buildings... By all rights, it oughta be impossible to miss.

River cutting through the land would make for muddy soils as well as a certain grade. Maybe not the rolling hills of central Velt, but the slick would more than make up for a gentler incline. For all the long walk it'd be, hard to ask for anything more true to life.

By now, his advance had taken him onto the drawbridge across Candaeln's moat. He glanced down, taking in the brackish, murky, and very still water below. He'd seen his fair share of moats in battle too, if one wanted to speak on "true to life".

His eyes narrowed, the mind behind them thinking for a long, silent moment.

...

Shaking his head as if disappointed in himself, he kept walking. There was a whole city to get through, and half the day'd been spent parading.

At least the riverbed wouldn't get him poisoned.
It’s still not too late
Gerard Segremors


@Raineh Daze

For a brief instant, something flickered behind his eyes as he took in Tyaethe's suggestion. He respected her titles and accolades, and all the experience that had forged them. That much would always ring true. But for Reon's sake...

"Alright, alright, you don't gotta be a kid about it."

He knew when he was being mocked. He affixed her gaze with a blunt, level-browed exasperation of his own, albeit much less rooted in the sentiment of slowing down your words for a stupid kid. He was a stupid kid, fair enough, but he'd held conversation fine thus far. Screwing with the cadence was just obnoxious.

A snort escaped his nostrils as he took a step away in a half-turn out, towards the direction of the Candaeln gate, and rolled on. Whatever. He'd dealt with worse from worse people, though maybe that was what had made them so much easier to ignore. Who the hell cared about what people you didn't respect thought?

"Aimlenn's a big city. Most everywhere on the main approach here is flat enough— I didn't expect anywhere to be a terribly steep climb further in." he relayed his reasoning simply, neither crumbling beneath embarrassment nor stoking the flare that had come and gone. No point in either. Own the mistake, take in the correction, and move on. That was the only way forward.

"I'll go hunting, Ma'am." When his head turned back to face her, it held no tension as he inclined it in gratitude. "Thanks for the tip."

With that, the young man pivoted on his heel fully, and strode further into the sunlit yard, new objective in tow. Not like she had any reason to lie about it. Over his shoulder, he threw her a hearty enough wave...

"I'll swing by the chapel when I'm back!"

... And a reassurance that he'd listened to everything, in spite of the gripes.
Gerard Segremors


@Raineh Daze

"You're right, he should've." the erstwhile mercenary agreed readily, almost tonelessly, amber gaze following hers into the middle distance. "And the next one like him will again. Whether it's a trio of us, or just me."

He had to ingrain the goal. He had to visualize the state in which he matched him blow for blow, strike for strike, strength for strength. If it could be achieved, it was there— Sir Agrahn. Sir Cyrus. Could he measure up to them, legendary titans of the field? He didn't know. He certainly didn't feel like a once-in-a-lifetime warrior... But the type of greed to chase those mythical figures had gotten him this far. And if he reached even a fraction of their ability, the Bandit King he'd fought would be trivial. Of that, Gerard was certain.

As for her query, he nodded along his understanding— to be turned into a supernatural, superhuman entity at the age it seemed she had, it did stand to reason that she'd not have much cause to worry about honing the body, when it was already so empowered. Lucky him. It was a rare day anyone got to elucidate the honored Paladin.

"It's a drill from my past life." he began, "We used to sprint uphill to improve our dashing ability. It gets the legs used to exploding forward for harder and longer— the way I fight is all pace and pressure, so being able to crush distance quickly, suddenly, and keep swinging hard, time after time, is as important as it gets. It is endurance work, in a way— but it's also just building up the strength that gives you raw speed. Doing that, over and over, so I could keep swarming a defense like his until it breaks. It took us a bit to crack him open."

A wry grin played over his face, mirroring that of his comrade. "If only we had a hill. Pushing up from below hits you twice as hard."

He knew she had a point, regarding recovery. Nobody could work themselves endlessly, grinding truly down to the bone, and expect to gain much. If you had nothing left to build upon, then your house was sure to crumble— If you endlessly sowed your fields the same way, never feeding the soil, your crop would dwindle with each passing month.

He'd felt it firsthand on march, years ago. Roving between battlefields made for rough living, and with strictly constrained meals, at times it was a miracle the Regiment hadn't strung themselves out completely. He'd lost friends that way. Hunger was a powerful motivator, but exhaustion made mistakes appear where they never should've.

But...

"Thanks for the concern, ma'am. And the advice— I'll be sure to peruse it after this. Right now, I feel able enough to at least manage this much."

He had to strike it hard and fast. Attacking one's own weakness was rarely so easy as the day you were both able and not only willing, but driven. Rest could come in a few more laps.
Gerard Segremors


@Raineh Daze

That's what Elven sounds like? Huh... Lilette? Lilette, Lilette, that's not a name I've—

"... Anyway!"

Whatever, don't worry about it. Got it.

He eyed the not-actually-at-all-young woman cautiously as she rose up, straightening her back and pinning him with eyes that seemed just a touch too bright in the shade, her refuge from Lady Reon's disdainful eye. Though her deathly pallor and lynx pupils were proof enough that she was far from an ordinary girl... he still found need to remind himself that this was the same person who had donned that towering harness of plate, and swung around what was only now the second largest blade he'd seen in five years on the field.

It was hard to link them. Such different visages arcane helms and girlish frills could present.

"Oh, that."

He folded his arms, and loosed something halfway between a sigh and a ragged grunt. Now, it was his turn to look into the middle distance for a moment, searching for his phrasing. He didn't take terribly long to arrive on it— now that it didn't quite feel like he was about to be chewed out, there wasn't so much need.

"Trying to settle my mind, I think." he ventured, looking back to her beneath a furrowed brow. "Whenever I look back on Jeremiah... We did kick his ass, the Captain, Fionn, and I. But if it was just me, I'm not so confident. Think I get torn in half more often than not."

All told, it was a markedly casual assessment of such grim odds. He'd already faced them.

"So I want to start working right away, before we have to face someone or something like that again. I might be on my own for it, y'know?"
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