Lemons

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

You don't get it.

What do ya have to lose when you've got everythin' to gain?

Alja laughed.

"Well, glad you think of me that highly. But I'm...I'm not all that, really."

Her eyes fell a little bit. When she spoke again, it was most unlike her: halting and hesitant. "Really, I'm terrible. I promise. Not worth trying to help. Can I...if I told you a story, Graves, would you listen?" She turned away, staring at the cistern, and continued without letting him cut in. "It's about...an Edinburgh girl, and how she became who she is. This—mess of failures and mistakes."

She took one more deep breath. "Once upon a time, in Edinburgh, there was a twelve year old girl." Her face, unseen to Graves, was twisted up tight, holding back as much emotion as she could. Her voice was tight and strained. "She lived with her mother Elaine, her father Connor, and her...her brother. Gavin. He was five years her elder." Her fists clenched tight at her sides, and she lifted them, lifting up her knees and wrapping her arms around them. "This girl loved her parents very much, of course, but it was her brother that she loved the most. He was a super nice guy. Always had time for her. Never too busy to help her with her English homework, or to cut up an apple for this little brat." The last words were spat with absolute venom, and Alja paused a moment to compose herself.

"Then, one day, when their parents were out shoppin', someone came into the house. Gavin peeked out through a door, and a look of horror came onto his face. He shoved her into the closet of the room they shared in their small apartment, locked it, and whispered to her: Whatever you do, Kelly, do NOT come out until I tell you to, okay? He paused. I love you."

A shaky breath, less controlled than before. "So she...so she didn't. She stayed in that closet. And through a crack in the door, I—she—" Her chest began to heave. "—watched as...his...he had a gun, and Gavin—and I didn't—I couldn't—his head—"

And then again, she laughed.

But not her normal laugh this time. Not a nice laugh; a boisterous one, or a gentle one. It was a harsh, grating death-rattle of a sound, filled with scorn and anger.

"I watched—I watched it. I watched him die. And I...I sat in a closet. And I did nothing."

She laughed harder.

She was still laughing when the first tear trickled down her cheeks, opening a little rivulet of clear skin across her filthy face. Then, at some point—she wasn't quite sure when—the laughing gave over to crying. She wept openly, not even trying to wipe the tears away. For the next few minutes, she simply sat there, knees pulled up to her torso, head in her hands. Her chest heaved as sobs wracked it. At some point, the waterfall petered out, leaving a pregnant silence into which she poured her pent-up emotion.

At length, her breath hitched, and her crying shuddered to a halt. She turned her head, smiled lamely at Graves, her eyes still laden. And when she spoke, her voice was quieter, and seemed much younger than before.

"I—I'm sorry..."

Powerless. Useless. Worthless.

And then she was stricken by another set of sobs. She collapsed sideways, clutching Graves' armored shoulder and pressing her forehead to it, and wailed like a lost child.

"I'M SORRY!"

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

A blush came to Alja's face as Graves spoke, and her eyes widened. Wha—Oh, it was when we were drunk, wasn't it...? Bah! No time for that right now! Not important!

She took a deep breath in, putting all thoughts of...of—she nearly put her head in her hands—Leaves out of her mind. This was not the time, nor was it the place. She stared out at the cistern, pondering what she would say. The sound of the new waterfall hammered at her ears with a heavy shhhhhhh, and she focused on the sound as a means for clearing her mind. There was something viscerally familiar about how Graves was talking. She stared at the water falling for some seconds, cataloguing her thoughts and organizing what she was about to say. Because she knew what Graves was thinking, and if she could do anything about it, then she was going to, damnit.

"Y'know, Graves...I know you." She responded to his bittersweet smile with a worried frown. "I know you a lot better than you think."

She crossed her legs, pulling herself up to a much more upright sitting position and looking at him seriously. "...and I know you a lot better than I wish I did." She held up a hand, forestalling a response and showing she wasn't done before she gave a heavy sigh. "So I know exactly what's goin' through your head right now. You remember back when we were fighting Arnaakus?"

She shook her head. "I ran in like a crazy person. Probably shoulda died. But someone," she laughed a little bit, "jumped in front of the claw. Saved my life. But threw himself into far, far too much danger to save a headcase like me. What kinda girl would I be if I didn't do my best to save you too?"

"And anyway, my life isn't anything special. Not like Leaves is going to reciprocate anyway—I mean, look at me, why would she?—and I'm sure you have people waiting for you too." Her frown changed to a kind, gentle smile, and she grabbed Graves' hand in both of hers, squeezing it tightly. "Graves—" A memory resurfaced from the murk of her drunken night, and stared him dead in the eyes, "—Andrew. You are worth so much more than you let yourself believe."

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Whoa.

For just a moment, Alja stared at Graves, this aggressive titan of a man who wielded blood just as fluidly as his absent sword. The hint of a smile crossed her face before she crushed it down; it wouldn't be good for Graves right now if she did what she wanted desperately to do. Because what she wanted to do was laugh. Laugh a lot. Because she had never, in her wildest dreams, thought that Graves could ever be so...so...so adorable. She wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. She wanted to hug him, get him some warm milk or tea or something, and tuck him in to bed where he was safe.

But no. Graves didn't need anybody laughing at him right now. There was nowhere to tuck him in, and she got the feeling that if she hugged him, he'd punch her. So no, no overdramatic displays of emotion. Still, though, she was glad that he was opening up to her. His emotions had always been a bit of a mystery to Alja, and his past just as much. She knew basically nothing about the man behind the mask, and now that, perhaps, he was beginning to peek out, the last thing she wanted to do was to punt him right back down there by laughing at him. Perhaps it wouldn't have been important before, but the more they knew about each other now, the safer they were.

So instead, she kept it to a bare smile, one that could be dismissed if she needed to, and sat back down next to him, her breaths still coming harsh and heavy, though they were beginning to slow.

"Then a lotta people are idiots. We gotta stick together. And you're a good man, Graves. I'll be damned if I let you go down while I've still got breath in me."

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Good. Graves was okay. Though she knew that he'd still been breathing, she'd still been concerned; he could've stopped at any moment. Sighing, Alja hauled herself to one knee, pointing up towards where they'd been previously. She couldn't see past the water; no Rael, and she had no idea whether or not the kids had actually made it to her ice platform. Either way, the platform was gone now, she could tell; she hoped their landing had been better than Graves' would've been.

"We're not too far off from where we were. Got washed off that ledge, ended up down here. 'S a big cistern. Guess most of the sewers end up comin' through here sometime. Haven't seen Rael or Kalie, though. Maybe they found a way to stay up there? They're both pretty good at gettin' out of the way of stuff like that. Hope they did, at least."

She turned back to Graves as he puked up the sewer water. He didn't look so great; her face quirked into a worried frown. "You hurt? Tried to shield you best I could, but can't be sure, y'know?" She wearily lifted herself to her feet, walking around him and trying to see if there were any obvious exposed wounds. None that she could see. His arm looked a little messed up, but it was already like that. So no real injuries...Her eyes widened for a second.

"Ah, shit, your sword." She huffed out a breath, then reached into her belt and pulled out a long knife, placing it next to him. "Sorry it ain't as good as what you're used to, but better than nothin,' right? I'll make you a new sword once we get outta here if we don't find your old one."

Septima Strikers (Super Powers/Social Turmoil) [High Casual] [Gunvolt]

Kana shrugged.

"I get what you're saying, but if we leave them awake, then we risk them figuring out what we're planning and finding a way to report it to whoever's calling the shots. Just wanna be safe. As for a plan..."

She went quiet for a few seconds, clearly thinking, before continuing. "Right, here's what I'm thinking. You look like you've got some kind of force powers, controlling things with your mind, pinning people to walls, stuff like that. My Septima just makes me much more physically competent; faster, stronger, better reflexes, information processing, that kind of thing."

She paced the room back and forth with the unguarded tink of her blades, mind running hot. She really didn't want to think about this stuff tonight, damnit. "If we can find some way to get to the outside of the ship, then you can stick me to the wall and I can run up it to the bridge, find the one responsible for this whole mess—I'd bet on him being up there—and deal with him. Cut the head off the snake, yknow? If I need to hurt people at all, I'd rather hurt as small an amount as possible."

So then, the questions remained...had she misjudged Kira's powers? Would the smaller woman be capable of sticking Kana to the wall for long enough to get up there? Would she even agree to the plan in the first place? As plans went, it certainly wasn't airtight, there were about a billion things that could go wrong, and if any of them did, it spelled disaster for them and everyone on board. Kana sighed as she tied her long dark hair up into a tight bun, pinning it with a needle-sharp hairpin that could be used as a shiv if the situation called for it, then smiled lamely at Kira as her companion searched the pockets of the people that had been sent to flush them out of their rooms.

"At least, that's the best I can come up with on short notice. If you've got any better ideas, I sure would like to hear them."

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Alja opened her mouth to throw a snarky remark back at Graves for his criticism of the way she'd handled the fight—some of us are trying not to use too much magic so we don't burn ourselves out, vampire boy, or something like that—but...no time. There was no time. The sound began as a distant gurgle, but swiftly filled her ears, and she only recognized a moment before she saw it what it was.

Shit.

She estimated she only had a few seconds before the water hit her. Really, she was lucky she was taking care of the newbies; it put her much farther from the looming tide. It had already swept past Rael and Graves, carrying them towards her all too quickly. She had no time to grab them before the water would be on her as well. So instead, she grabbed the hands of two of the lowbies, running as fast as she could towards the precipice and hoping the rest would follow her. Stomping her foot one last time, she accreted a narrow platform of ice beneath the drop-off, where with any luck the fast-moving water wouldn't strike with full force, and nearly tossed Yasmin and the white haired girl at it. "GO!" With any luck, they'd get down there in time, and with any luck, it'd hold. That done, she turned back to the wall of water now only feet from her. No time for anything else.

Unless...

She couldn't see Rael through the swampy, shitty water, but there was Graves, careening towards her. He'd been knocked head over ass, and she sucked in a breath. He'd have a hard landing. But she...

She poised herself on the edge and sucked in a final deep breath, everything in her screaming to not do what she was about to do. Then, as Graves was hurled past her, she threw herself at him, locking him in her armored embrace as they fell towards the water beneath. She hoped for just a moment that he was conscious, or if not, that he regained consciousness soon. And then, as she plummeted towards the water, she breathed in. And she Stood Firm.

Her vision flickered into shades of gray and her eyes followed suit, burning with a terrible monochrome light. She turned her head—the limit of the movement that Stand Firm permitted—and counted the seconds down until she hit the water. With any luck, she'd absorb enough of the impact for Graves to walk it off. Looked like there was a ramp at the edge there that she could haul him out from. Least one thing was going right. If it had just been a cistern with no edge, she probably would've been sunk. Figuratively and literally.

3...
2...
1...

She closed her eyes.

Zero.

The sound of the impact was tremendous as she shattered the surface of the water. Her Stand Firm broke, and she gagged as the cascade of shit-water pummeled her into the lake, squirming into her mouth and filling it with the taste of sewage. She screwed her eyes shut tighter as she forced herself to move forwards with Graves still gripped tightly to her chest, blindly kicking even as she sank deeper. Her lungs began to feel the pressure, and there was nothing beneath her still as her armor dragged her down into the filthy pool. Then the arms that wrapped Graves—still limp, and Alja feared the worst—bumped into something.

There!

Slogging through the sewer water, she hauled herself up the broad ramp one agonizing step at a time until she placed Graves (unconscious for sure) on his back on the relatively safe stone next to the pool, fighting the urge to collapse as she checked him, tilting back his head and neck. A thin stream of rancid water leaked from his mouth.

Oh thank God. He's breathing.

She sat heavily next to him, thankful that she wouldn't need to give emergency breaths to Graves of all people. That sounded embarrassing for both of them.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

There was a squeal as Alja crashed her flail into the dire rat's chin in an epic uppercut, spraying out a shotgun blast of icicles into its neck and head for good measure. It staggered for a moment, then backed unsteadily away from her, squealing and hissing. She raised an eyebrow. A huge slash across the side by Graves (still bleeding). Slammed into a wall by Rael's thunder magic. Shoulder and chin popped hard by Glacier Chain, with some hefty weight in front of it. And yet somehow, it was still standing. In fact, it was still fighting, as it darted forwards, biting at her shin hard enough for her to actually feel the pressure through the metallic shell of her armor. Her eyes widened fractionally. This thing was denting her heavy armor with its teeth.

Yeah, I'm about done with this.

She shook the damned thing off of her leg, then stomped on the ground once more, putting a little bit more of her magic in it this time. A dull pain began to build in her temples. A moment later, a spike of ice nearly two feet across and needle-sharp pierced from the ground beneath the dire rat, impaling it and pinning it feet off the ground. It twitched once more before falling still.

She inhaled deeply, letting her Frost Armor, the ice spike, and the wall that divided them from the other group dissolve, returning their magic to her. Then, somewhat rejuvenated, she turned to Rael, a grim smile on her face as she nudged the rat with her foot. "Rat as strong as that, we gotta be gettin' close to the nest. Can't be much farther now." Her eyes roved further, playing over her group, as well as the inexperienced adventurers that had gotten themselves down here. "Is everyone okay? Anyone seriously injured? Are the four of you good to get yourselves back to the surface? Shouldn't be any rats between you and sunlight now."

She rolled and popped her shoulders and neck. She was...discomforted. That rat was a hell of a lot harder to kill than even the dire rat bosses had been before the hack. Players of their levels should be able to pretty much one-shot anything in the Thorinn sewers. Her mouth hardened to a grim line. I've got a bad feeling about this.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

The scream echoed in Alja's head.

As she dashed after Graves at full speed, heedless of Glacier Chain smacking into walls, she could only think of Luci—the woman that she might have loved, before everything went to absolute shit—screaming instead. Cold sweat ran down her face, and all she could hear was her heartbeat. And the scream. As they eventually emerged after what felt like several eons layered on top of each other, she should have been both worried about the other adventurers' well-beings and exhausted from the sprint in full armor, but she could only feel a blazing relief: thank God. Thank God they're okay.

Then, a moment later, her mind roared back to combat mode.

Step one: make sure the kids are safe.

With a grunt, Alja stomped on the floor in lieu of space to swing her flail to its full extent. As she did, a wall of jagged ice crystals sprang up in front of the group of less experienced adventurers, cornering them, but keeping them as safe as she possibly could. Then, with that taken care of—at least for the moment, depending on how quickly a big rat could beat through her ice (not very quickly, she thought)—she turned her attention to the rat. It was...big. Gripping her flail halfway down the chain, she spun it in tight circles, warily approaching while at the same time talking to the adventurers behind it, trying her best to keep them calm. Her face was clenched in a tight smile.

"Hey, sorry it took us so long. We ran as soon as we heard the scream. Have you out of here in no time, alright?" She recognized one of them: a low-level ranged DPS that she'd partnered with on a dungeon guide a week or two back. Her heart clenched. What was he doing down here? She kept talking. Kept trying to keep the three of them calm. As tense as she was, her voice was light, conversational. "How's your build been developin', Yasmin? Any good drops recently? If you want, I could make you a new sword or somethin' after we get outta here, hey?" Her hand clenched tightly on Glacier Chain's haft, and a shell of Frost Armor enveloped her. Good. They were safe, and she was as safe as she could get. Now:

Step two: hit something.

Giving her flail one more whirl for good luck, she slung it forwards like a whip, doing her best to work it through the tight space. There was a satisfying wet smack as it slammed into the rat's shoulder, and a grin formed on her face. It felt good to be protecting people again. "Happy for you that you found yourself a group. Just got one myself." She struck again, missing the rat by a hair and grimacing as she wished she could use offensive Tundra Glass safely again. "Wish I'd gotten one a long time ago. You're ahead of the curve!"

Iquenos: In Nomine Domini

Etoile

---

It was a good thing that Pagonia put his hand on Etoile's shoulder; otherwise, in that moment—the absurd adrenaline starting to leak out of her bloodstream—she probably would have fallen. She grit her teeth tightly, struggling to keep herself upright. Don't you fall, Etoile. Don't you dare FUCKING fall. Her breaths rattled in and out, rasping against her scratched-up throat. When she spoke, her voice was just as scratchy, and withering. "Don't patronize me, Pagonia. I haven't practiced properly in months. I know full well my form is garbage." Her breaths kept heaving in and out, eyes narrowed to slits, concentrating on not feeling the nails in her head. No magic for a few minutes, at least. So...her mind started to race. No magic, at least for a while. She couldn't cast any spells. Her leg wound was starting to bother her again, after that run; blood was starting to leak down her leg. At least until she could deal with that, no intense combat. No magic for squad support. No direct intense combat against the maleficarum. So what could she do?

"I'm no good a fighter like the rest of you, but I'm sure you know what I can do by now, so if there's anything I can do to help defeat that, then you can bet on every god above that I'll gladly take the chance."

Etoile turned, and for a moment her head spun. Clara. The dome of wind she'd erected around the Thlecian had kept her safe, and she'd managed to haul herself off the ground. And here she was. Just as incapacitated as Etoile was, if not more, and yet still offering everything she was. Etoile's teeth gnashed. She needed to do something. She needed to do something! She needed to DO SOMETHING!

"Glad you're safe, Clara. Can you do me a favor?" She breathed deeply, taking her sabre and slashing through her trousers and the makeshift bandage she'd wrapped there, revealing the full extent of the wound on her inner thigh. It was ugly, it was painful, and the blood wouldn't stop coming. "Gotta stop this from bleeding. Don't care if it hurts, I need to know I'm not going to bleed out. So take some of that crystal and just...jam it in there, okay?"

She heaved in another deep breath and straightened up, blotting out the pain. She didn't know whether Clara was going to crystal up her leg. But it didn't really matter if she did or didn't. She walked with the barest limp up to Sparky and Zestasia, settling into a graceful combat stance. She opened her mouth, then thought for a moment. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't give orders. Sparky was impetuous. Just because she was in combat didn't mean she wouldn't dispute, and even a momentary lapse of concentration—for either and both—could spell disaster. She wasn't the best fighter right now, but...she had her mind. So she didn't give orders. She gave information, voice low, hoarse, and fast.

"Zes, if you need to recharge, sunlight is to your eight o' clock, about twenty feet away. Sparks, better to use your sword as a foci than a weapon right now." Her headache had abated some. Hmm. A couple minutes and she'd have a few spells left in her. "Malum maleficara externalize some of their magic, you can probably feel it in the air. Their ether is always open. Better to hit them with raw magic over using a physical weapon, they're more susceptible to it."

She took a deep breath, fighting past her sore throat. Her voice lowered even further to barely over a breath, pitched only to reach the two next to her as the maleficarum clawed her way out of the tree Pythia had launched her into. "I'm mostly useful right now in my capacity as a decoy. I'll do my best to draw her attention, see if I can give you two a clear shot." Another, final deep breath. And then, teeth clenched tightly and sword held in a long-practiced grip—the pain rippling through told her thigh told her that Clara had accreted her crimson crystal there—she ran at the maleficarum.

I really hope I can trust them.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

For a moment, Alja was quiet as they sloshed through the sewer, thinking over the argument from earlier. She'd gotten heated. She shouldn't have; that wasn't how you made a point.

"It's our responsibility! We need to!"

"Yeah, I know it's not a game anymore! That's WHY! If it's not a game, then the denizens that are dying because WE AREN'T DOING OUR JOB are dying because of us!"

"Fine! Maybe I WILL go with them, dumbass!"

But despite what she'd said, she hadn't gone with the other group. Because she was still afraid, and she wanted to go with people she knew. As much as she and Rael had their differences...as much as Benkei and Kalie had annoyed her in the past...she could at least trust them. Trust them to do their jobs. They knew what they were doing, they were good at what they did, and she could rely on them to have her back if she needed it. But the other group? She'd only ever met one of them, and it had been months ago. she had no idea what they could do. Had no idea if they'd have her back. And because of that—because she was selfish and afraid—she didn't have theirs. She let the silence continue for a few more seconds.

"Still, it's kinda BS, innit?" She shook her head, speaking quieter than she usually did. "Graves is right. We should be out there. You know it as well as I do, Rael." She sighed, pulling Glacier Chain off of her back and slinging the chain over her shoulder in case she needed it, and to have something to do with her hands. "We're cowards, is what we are. We're the best at what we do, so why are we hidin'?" She heaved a breath. An image of Enos impaled on the spike, eyes staring at nothing, suddenly flashed in front of her eyes. Luci screaming. Aaginim's crumpled tin-can corpse. Leaves—precious Leaves—in mortal danger. She'd been late. She'd let them down.

What a stupid question. She knew whey they were hiding. She knew why she was hiding. If she let something like that happen again, she knew damn well that wouldn't be able to forgive herself. But still...

"Next time a dungeon needs clearing, I'm goin' in. I'll do it alone if I need to, goddamnit."