Location: Augmented Reality Center - P.R.C.U. Campus
Dance Monkey #4.053: If You Are What You Say You Are
Interaction(s): N/A
The suit still fit.
He wasn't sure why he was surprised - it wasn't like he'd let himself go in the years between now and the last time he'd wore it - but nonetheless he stood in front of the mirror in mild disbelief, the purple jacket and pants conforming nicely to his figure and pairing with the lavender shirt he wore beneath. The bow-tie, a semi-casual and slightly-floppy silk mauve number, was the aperitif to a suit that looked far more joyful than Gil felt; he was well-aware of the theme he had cooked up with the now-absent Calliope for the formal, and at the time of conception, returning one of his actual red carpet looks had felt like the perfect compliment to the motif of the evening. Now, though, he stood across from his reflection wearing a reminder of a life he'd discarded this very afternoon, preparing to revisit a version of him he was very consciously trying to leave behind, if only as a lighthearted facsimile.
The beers and the shooters burned in his belly and he swayed slightly on his feet. Food would be needed in short order, but for now he just tippled from a flask secreted in his inside pocket, swishing the warmth around his mouth in an effort to stop grinding his teeth. He was nervous, he realized, but couldn't quite pinpoint why; he'd done plenty of functions like this before, galas with far more pomp and circumstance to them than a simple school dance. Even casting aside public events from his pre-academy history, he'd surmounted far more troubling calamities in the last fortnight than tonight's ball. And yet there was a part of him that almost longed for the raining of hard-light blows upon his body over the social navigation that would be required of him this evening.
Well, expected of him, at least. Perhaps that was what vexed him in this moment; the weight of expectation. The gulf between what the student body anticipated, and what he was prepared to deliver.
He shook his head, scattering the thoughts to the wind as best he could. No time for it now; Lorcán and Rory had already headed out, urged on by his own faltering words assuring them he'd be right behind. They'd hesitated, and for that Gil was appreciative, both boys aware this was out of character for the Gil they knew, that he should be leading the charge, not floundering in the dorm, desperately trying to conjure the wherewithal to step outside and face the dance. But that was the Gil they knew, past tense. What of this Gil? This nervous, agitated Gil, who would just as soon wrap himself in a plush duvet nestled in the corner of his bedroom, with naught but the gifted bottle and his phone for company, as he would stride out into the night with swagger in his hips and a smile across his face?
Do it quick, like ripping off a band-aid. Just reach for the door, pull it open, and cross the threshold; once you're out, you're out, and there's no going back in. One foot in front of the other, and you won't even realize you've made the decision before you're there.
It took some more convincing, and another pull from the flask, but Gil did eventually make the leap.
The theme had come together spectacularly; in a way, Gil's crushing and sincere regret at the choice of concept was its own glowing recognition of its success. Everywhere he looked, the ARC was adorned in an extravaganza of Hollywood glitz and glam. The red carpet had been a particularly rocky entrance to an event Gil was already struggling with, far too eerily similar in its recreation to the paparazzi assault he'd faced many a time over his career, but even that was a backhanded compliment to how completely everything had come together. Would that Calliope were here to appreciate her hard work, because Gil certainly wasn't able to.
All about him was commotion; those lingering or taking a breather outside as he'd arrived had recognized him, of course they had, as equal parts student peer and campus celebrity. Some had pointed, some had the dignity to only dart their eyes back and forth, but the whispers had circulated nonetheless, about evening visitors, about nights in the infirmary. Jokes had been made that this must all seem very banal compared to Gil's career before PRCU, jokes that were met first with wan smiles and then withering stares. Banal was not the adjective in play: Gil preferred 'disconcertingly surreal'.
Bar. That was Gil's first thought, although food followed closely behind. Canapes littered the hall, again dressed up in keeping with the LA glitterati that pervaded (by resented design) the evening, and Gil mineswept trays and plates as he weaved through the thronging crowd toward the wall of booze on the other side of the arena. Fistfuls of cooked dough and seafood were mashed into his mouth, morsels admittedly delicious but barely chewed, less appetizers for the buffet and more belly-fodder for soaking up booze. Gil was in no way a lightweight; from a young age he'd been a prodigious drinker, especially for his otherwise-average stature, and that was under no threat this evening. He just needed to pad out his stats, so to speak. Tonight, he was going to get breathtakingly drunk.
He was attended to quickly, perhaps the first element of the night he was genuinely pleased about without any bittersweet complications, and he took a pause to consider what he actually wanted. A soda water, first of all, something to clear the pallet and maybe top-up from the flask if needs must - certainly no more beer, as the cans he'd polished off with Rory's help still sat gassy and bloating in his stomach. No, he needed something cleaner, smoother, something he could nurse while he got his bearings and ate some proper food before diving deeper into his self-imposed debauchery. The cocktail of the evening was, of course, the martini, and a menu on the bar listed several needless variations on them, but Gil would be damned if he was going to lean into the theme any more than he already had, inadvertently or otherwise. No, in times like these, he returned to his mother's favorite, brought in tumblers to the beach on sunny days, a mix undoubtedly quaint and bordering on tame, but nostalgic, a drink that tasted unequivocally of home, at least when a good cup of tea was out of reach, as it often was this side of the Atlantic.
One Elderflower Collins later, Gil was armed with a plate, sampling the buffet, scanning the crowd for his teammates.
He wasn't sure why he was surprised - it wasn't like he'd let himself go in the years between now and the last time he'd wore it - but nonetheless he stood in front of the mirror in mild disbelief, the purple jacket and pants conforming nicely to his figure and pairing with the lavender shirt he wore beneath. The bow-tie, a semi-casual and slightly-floppy silk mauve number, was the aperitif to a suit that looked far more joyful than Gil felt; he was well-aware of the theme he had cooked up with the now-absent Calliope for the formal, and at the time of conception, returning one of his actual red carpet looks had felt like the perfect compliment to the motif of the evening. Now, though, he stood across from his reflection wearing a reminder of a life he'd discarded this very afternoon, preparing to revisit a version of him he was very consciously trying to leave behind, if only as a lighthearted facsimile.
The beers and the shooters burned in his belly and he swayed slightly on his feet. Food would be needed in short order, but for now he just tippled from a flask secreted in his inside pocket, swishing the warmth around his mouth in an effort to stop grinding his teeth. He was nervous, he realized, but couldn't quite pinpoint why; he'd done plenty of functions like this before, galas with far more pomp and circumstance to them than a simple school dance. Even casting aside public events from his pre-academy history, he'd surmounted far more troubling calamities in the last fortnight than tonight's ball. And yet there was a part of him that almost longed for the raining of hard-light blows upon his body over the social navigation that would be required of him this evening.
Well, expected of him, at least. Perhaps that was what vexed him in this moment; the weight of expectation. The gulf between what the student body anticipated, and what he was prepared to deliver.
He shook his head, scattering the thoughts to the wind as best he could. No time for it now; Lorcán and Rory had already headed out, urged on by his own faltering words assuring them he'd be right behind. They'd hesitated, and for that Gil was appreciative, both boys aware this was out of character for the Gil they knew, that he should be leading the charge, not floundering in the dorm, desperately trying to conjure the wherewithal to step outside and face the dance. But that was the Gil they knew, past tense. What of this Gil? This nervous, agitated Gil, who would just as soon wrap himself in a plush duvet nestled in the corner of his bedroom, with naught but the gifted bottle and his phone for company, as he would stride out into the night with swagger in his hips and a smile across his face?
Do it quick, like ripping off a band-aid. Just reach for the door, pull it open, and cross the threshold; once you're out, you're out, and there's no going back in. One foot in front of the other, and you won't even realize you've made the decision before you're there.
It took some more convincing, and another pull from the flask, but Gil did eventually make the leap.
The theme had come together spectacularly; in a way, Gil's crushing and sincere regret at the choice of concept was its own glowing recognition of its success. Everywhere he looked, the ARC was adorned in an extravaganza of Hollywood glitz and glam. The red carpet had been a particularly rocky entrance to an event Gil was already struggling with, far too eerily similar in its recreation to the paparazzi assault he'd faced many a time over his career, but even that was a backhanded compliment to how completely everything had come together. Would that Calliope were here to appreciate her hard work, because Gil certainly wasn't able to.
All about him was commotion; those lingering or taking a breather outside as he'd arrived had recognized him, of course they had, as equal parts student peer and campus celebrity. Some had pointed, some had the dignity to only dart their eyes back and forth, but the whispers had circulated nonetheless, about evening visitors, about nights in the infirmary. Jokes had been made that this must all seem very banal compared to Gil's career before PRCU, jokes that were met first with wan smiles and then withering stares. Banal was not the adjective in play: Gil preferred 'disconcertingly surreal'.
Bar. That was Gil's first thought, although food followed closely behind. Canapes littered the hall, again dressed up in keeping with the LA glitterati that pervaded (by resented design) the evening, and Gil mineswept trays and plates as he weaved through the thronging crowd toward the wall of booze on the other side of the arena. Fistfuls of cooked dough and seafood were mashed into his mouth, morsels admittedly delicious but barely chewed, less appetizers for the buffet and more belly-fodder for soaking up booze. Gil was in no way a lightweight; from a young age he'd been a prodigious drinker, especially for his otherwise-average stature, and that was under no threat this evening. He just needed to pad out his stats, so to speak. Tonight, he was going to get breathtakingly drunk.
He was attended to quickly, perhaps the first element of the night he was genuinely pleased about without any bittersweet complications, and he took a pause to consider what he actually wanted. A soda water, first of all, something to clear the pallet and maybe top-up from the flask if needs must - certainly no more beer, as the cans he'd polished off with Rory's help still sat gassy and bloating in his stomach. No, he needed something cleaner, smoother, something he could nurse while he got his bearings and ate some proper food before diving deeper into his self-imposed debauchery. The cocktail of the evening was, of course, the martini, and a menu on the bar listed several needless variations on them, but Gil would be damned if he was going to lean into the theme any more than he already had, inadvertently or otherwise. No, in times like these, he returned to his mother's favorite, brought in tumblers to the beach on sunny days, a mix undoubtedly quaint and bordering on tame, but nostalgic, a drink that tasted unequivocally of home, at least when a good cup of tea was out of reach, as it often was this side of the Atlantic.
One Elderflower Collins later, Gil was armed with a plate, sampling the buffet, scanning the crowd for his teammates.