Avatar of The Irish Tree

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11 mos ago
Current @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3 likes
11 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6 likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3 likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.

Bio

No longer an asshole!

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@The Irish Tree

I realized I didn't put a bio in for GrillBears, Gammaton's creator, and I hadn't realized GrillBears interests overlap with NotEvenHere's until just now. Does Levia have her own factory? If not, then since you mentioned Levia's home was in the 'animal pens', and the Pits of Hivehill were intended to function as such, you would be more than welcome to have Levia live in the Pits. The Pits were also intended as an experiemtnal breeding ground, so maybe GrillBears and NotEvenHere were collaborators in the past?


I'd be down with GrillBears and NotEvenHere being collaborators. And, I'd probably still want to say that Levia has her own office for breakdown of hazardous materials, but she can definitely bunk in the Pits. Her and Gammaton can even have bunk beds!
Alice wasn't exactly shy when it came to seeing other people, so Brandy stripping wasn't weird until she thought about the fact that this was also where the dog was bathing...and, in the midst of her thinking about that, Francoise would suddenly grab her by her own collar and dunk her in, the werewolf alchemist flailing as she weakly paddled, emulating a perfect doggy way of swimming as she shook her head. "Nn...now my clothes are all wet..." Alice bemoaned, before getting assaulted by licks that, much to her chagrin, had the girl giggling.

Getting tickled was a strange experience for Alice, who promptly let out a high-pitched almost hyena-like laugh as tears welled in her eyes. It seemed Brandy had found her greatest weakness. The laughter would continue all the way until Brandy asked her questions, at which point the werewolf would deftly splash some water in Brandy's face to distract her, before counter-tickling both her sides. "I just joined last week, to be honest. I learned how to make all this stuff at the alchemist guild. The detergent though is SUPER simple, how you make it is you take three parts #@!@*(*(@#(%*&^, six parts (>|"""{)*&@#^!!, grind them finely in a powder and slowly add in some alkaline, and then you have super-stain-fighting detergent!"

Brandy, god bless her soul, likely didn't have the IQ necessary to process the amount of syllables in those words, but it sure sounded like stuff that could cause an explosion. Upon noticing that Brandy's jubly bits were kinda just...there, and exposed, Alice looked over to where her pack and Brandy's stuff were only to see Brandy's lightweight clothing start to lift off. Hurriedly paddling over, Alice would move her alchemical oven over to rest atop Brandy's stuff and turned it off, the decently heavy weight making sure that nothing blew away. Now sitting on the river bank and relaxing a bit in the sun, Alice would wash away the mud and grime on the town's sheets like it was nothing at all, a feat that would make even Brandy realize she was pretty experienced with chores and cleaning.

Once that was settled and the sheets were hung to dry, Alice would wait for Brandy to get out, dried, and dressed. Then...it was time to face Mrs. Elmwood.
At hearing that there was likely no work left at the guild save for chasing down vermin in the sewers, the archer's back slumped a bit as she remembered the hideous roaches, disgusting rats, and literal plague down there before she waved her hand dismissively to say: "I uh...think I'll have to say no to us taking on sewer work. They've got roaches down there the size of me. It sounds stupid, I know, but someone I was adventuring with nearly died down there!" The girl protested her hardest until she just deflated a bit, realizing that beggars couldn't be choosers, and just hoped that they could take the day off after their long adventure. Despite being raring to go to work, she wasn't raring to go wade through crap for less copper than they just received for their doubled efforts.

The girl would aimlessly look around, unsure of what to do for a good bit of time before something seemed to catch her eye. "Um...I'll catch up with you two at the guild a bit later. Need to take care of something," the nomad girl would say before suddenly running off to towards the gates of Palisade. She seemed transfixed on something, but was, in fact, looking for something in particular that she'd seen when they were tussling with the boars a few days ago. With her hunting prowess it would be a simple task to maintain her sense of direction in the woods around the town as she hunted not for animals, but for the Pipini herbs that they'd used to treat the unfortunate red-haired adventurer.

The druid girl had said they were used in simple healing potions, so the archer figured that she could grab a fairly good number and sell them to an alchemist for some extra coinage. Despite the urgency with which she seemed to depart the girl would return to the guild bright and chipper, leaves and twigs in her hair and a sack full of herbs tied at her hip. She hoped that her lizard and druid friends would appreciate her gathering all those herbs, since they could probably make enough coins that they didn't need to trudge through a sewer for money. Seriously, Palisade was so small, how did its sewer get so...monstrous!?
The nomad girl hummed a bit, before deciding that she could skimp a bit by buying arrows here for now rather than the fletcher proper. After all, the hide of monsters that they'd be in danger of encountering wasn't of the level that they needed to have really good arrowheads to penetrate. The girl's calloused hands would rest upon the counter as she looked, her keen eyes getting so close to the merchandise that it likely made the smith's son want to kick her out. But, she had to be certain that the arrow would fly straight...and these ones, despite the claim of not being special, proved to be adequately made. The goblin's rusted arrows would work in a pinch, but just to be certain the girl would buy eight arrows of similar enough slim lengths, not seeming to mind about what color the feathers were. Her quiver wasn't overly large, fitting a little over a dozen arrows snugly as she paid for her arrows and beamed at the blacksmith. "Thank you very much sir!" the archer said, giving a respectful bow to the smith before looking to the druid girl as she questioned if they should exchange coins.

"I think we should go see what kind of jobs we can take on first. After all, it'd be a pain to go exchange coins only to need copper anyways for stuff we need to prepare. Then, if we're already geared up, we can go ahead to the bank after," the archer said, stating what she thought was a pretty good plan, given that it wasn't like a bank was going to have all its money stolen in the span of twenty minutes while they went to scope out the quest board.

The archer laid a hand on the scabbard at her hip, wondering if she should have the smith sharpen her sword while they looked, but given the wear on it that could take some time...time that they ill could afford to spend, behind on job hunting as they were. "If you guys want , I could go look at jobs for us while you go to the bank and exchange."
Alice was surprised as her wrist was seized by her companion, and was somewhat surprised as well that Francoise seemed...guilty? Or at least, didn't like being called a Bad Dog. It was a surprising sort of day in general, and Alice had to admit...getting cheered up was a good change from the usual solo sulking. A warm smile spread across the werewolf girl's lips, saying: "No ear nibbling!" before she was dragged off towards the "river".

The "river" that Brandy was looking for would be found after Alice would pap her thighs with her tail and point in the right direction. With their butts now at the river, Alice would get to washing the sheets of the ladies that had beat her up, while also saying: "I can wash your clothes for you later if you want Brandy. This detergent is powerful stuff." Brandy would note that quite literally everything scrubbed by Alice was coming out looking better than it had been before Francoise's trampling, with the werewolf's hands deftly scrubbing sheet after sheet, and undergarment after - okay some of these old ladies were risque with their choices but yes, that did count as an undergarment. Alice would tenderly bathe Francoise, gentle with the dog in spite of his rampage. "I wonder if he acted like that because he never gets to go outside?"
The "small, cute, and fluffy" archer would bounce back and forth on the back of her feet, very happy that they seemed to be getting a good deal. It felt good that they'd found a place to offload metal loot, even if it meant that they may on occasion have to deal with the smith's son's mouth. Ah well...she figured that maybe he'd ease up a bit now that the head of the shop had given them his approval. Or maybe he'd just continue to be a dunce when it came to attracting customers. The archer felt that her sword could use a good whetstone treatment, but she wasn't aware if they offered that service at smithies. If anything, she expected she'd be able to find a good enough whetstone at the general store later to work the chips out of her blade.

While Big Red sorted out his purchase of a kite shield, the archer would ask: "Do you sell arrows here too? My tribe used to have the smith and fletcher work in seperate places, but I don't know if that's common everywhere." She was ignorant about a lot of things, and was hoping she'd get an answer from the friendly smith. She needed arrows to shoot monsters, after all.
With her head left to be unbonked and her body covered in sheets, clothes, and mud, Alice would slowly rise from the pile, tears welling in the corners of her eyes. She was apparently very frustrated, enough so that she was on the verge of crying. "...Why'd this go so wroooooooong!?" she asked, sinking to her knees and gathering the bundle of cloth, getting to work on her alchemical detergent recipe in her head. Plucking a hint of grass from a lawn, a few petals from a nearby blue flower, and carefully sifting through a bit of gravel by the roadside, Alice began pounding them into powder in her mortar until they were a fine mixture of a vaguely teal consistency, and then dunking them into her alchemical brewery pipe.

While that cooked, Alice would tearfully look up at Brandy and say: "I'm sorry that this all went so bad, Brandy...I wanted to help you, but I wound up needing your help way more. I'd have twice as many bumps behind my ears if your mouth wasn't so sharp...or...would it be blunt in this case...a-anyways, I'll take full responsibility for this..." The werewolf would hang her head, no doubt already imagining how mad Nim was going to be at her for failing what, on paper, was the simplest job in weeks. Eyeing the destructive dog that was responsible for all their misfortune, Alice pouted. "Why can't you just be a good dog? Or at least an average dog. Not such a...a..." Alice was about to commit the dog equivalent of the highest grade of insult. One unused unless in direst straits.

And these were some dire straits.

"BAD DOG!?"
Well. Steppe Archer wanted to kill him. A vein was visibly bulging on Steppe Archer's forehead, and through grit teeth she was about to return fire on this pig-smelling metal-polishing badger-eyed beanpole-masquerading-as-a-man-in-pants double burlap'd looking shinier-poop-than-thou looking ass of a storekeep, the thing that just about anyone ever coming in here could have wanted to happen happened. A big 'ol punch straight to his gut.

"I like him!" the archer said, clearly meaning the blacksmith which, despite having DECKED HIS SON, had infinitely more manners than the boy did. And more muscles.

With their lizard companion working on warming the room up with casual conversation and a discussion of goods, the archer would slowly take the sheathed sword off of her back and gently lay it on the countertop. "We also found this, Mr. Blacksmith." The sword wasn't a masterpiece or anything, but it was clear that the steel was of good quality, and the usage was light enough that the smith could resell it real easy.

"Hrm...fine blade. Why get rid of it? Can see the rust on your hilt from here, the blacksmith asked, to which the archer raised her arms and said: "My arms are a little too short. And it'd be a pain to have a sword that big with me when I use a bow a lot."

Looking the blade over in addition to the scrap offered, the blacksmith seemed to be running numbers in his head. "Going'ta hafta sharpen the rust off of these, but all together they might have some use. I'll give ya-"

"You aren't SERIOUSLY buying their scraps, are you pops!?" The shopkeep asked, having regained enough breath to go from wheezing to panting, supported by one arm on the counter.

"I'm a blacksmith, ya bleeding fool! We make do, and do it with whatever comes our way. 'Sides, steel like this is just fine for novices. Doesn't take more than a good WHACK to get a rat from the sewers," The smith explained to his son, emphasizing by slamming his fist so hard for the "whack" on the counter that his son's arm slipped, causing him to plant his cheek onto the counter.

"This much for the rusted bits, and this sword...this much," the smith said, detailing the currency they'd gain that the person writing this is too stupid to denominate because medieval currency conversion rates were a bitch and a half. But from what anyone could tell the price was fair...maybe even moreso.

"You lot look like you could use a place to spend that coin. Armor, weapons, repairs, come to me for any of that. That is, if me lout of a boy hasn't soured this store. Again."

"He almost did. Buuut, that was a pretty good punch. And I like your beard. You both okay with the offer?" The archer turned to her companions to see how they felt. It was certainly a good offer as far as anyone could tell, but none of them really had experience with mercantilism. For all anyone knew they were getting lowballed and about to walk out having less money than they could have. This was why scrolls of identify were nice.
"Smith sounds like a good idea. A general store merchant would probably just turn us away," the nomadic girl would say, crossing her arms. It seemed she'd gotten turned down from selling junk to a general store merchant before, judging by the level of "humph" to her expression. That didn't really matter though, given that they had to sell the goods and a smith was better anyways, since they could use scrap as opposed to a general merchant having to weigh if anybody is going to buy the random crap an adventurer thrusts onto them. After all, who was in the market for slime droppings?

Palisade town wasn't exactly large, so finding the only smithy banging away at his anvil. That and the smoke. While they approached the smith, the girl couldn't help but wonder if she could maybe get her weapon fixed up some. It had seen better days for sure, but she hadn't exactly abused the curved sword. It could probably be fixed up...probably. She just hoped the fair hand of copper she had from their previous two jobs could cover it.

"Excuse me, we have some tools and weapons we found on our last adventure. Would you be willing to buy them? They're not in the best of shape most of them, but I bet they could make for useful metal," the archer explained, hoping she could be heard over the metal clangs.
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