Avatar of UrbanEvolution
  • Last Seen: 7 yrs ago
  • Joined: 10 yrs ago
  • Posts: 732 (0.20 / day)
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    1. UrbanEvolution 10 yrs ago

Status

Recent Statuses

8 yrs ago
I went and found the rest of my soul being guarded by a giant floating rock and punched it. My soul, I mean. Not the rock. I yelled at that.
1 like
8 yrs ago
How many unarmed, flaccid clones of yourself do you think it would it take to kill Harambe?
1 like
8 yrs ago
THIS ROCK IS MY WIFE. AND THIS IS MY SPAWN.
2 likes
8 yrs ago
MOONINITES. DUPLICATE. REUNITE. AND UNNIHILATE.
8 yrs ago
It is time to investigate the CASE OF THE PIZZA CRYPTID.
1 like

Bio

I've been told that my username sounds like a new brand of women's perfume, whatever the hell that means.



My main fuccbois:
@Dragonbud
@Spoopy Scary
@Maxx
@Mr Allen J
@He Who Walks Behind
@SepticGentleman

Most Recent Posts

@UrbanEvolution

We haven't even got to my city's plot line.
You have no idea how far questionable breeding goes with royalty.


No pls
I know royalty has questionable breeding habits but I feel really bad for Cia. That's one crippling mutation right there.
Gerald's singing is equivalent to the death cries of a schizophrenic howler monkey.


It's still probably better than country.
Benedict Kaspin and Theresa ot an Bol'hjar



At the sound of water being rocketed in the air, followed by a scream, Ben's head snapped in the direction of the explosive turn of events. He followed the body up into the air and back down, and winced as she connected with the ground again. He stood up from his seat and lifted

"Well, she's probably dead." Ben said, crossing his arms and tilting his head trying to figure out how the fuck that woman had launched and where the fuck she came from. "I'll go and get her. See if she has anything work keeping." Ben announced, turning to Theresa for confirmation, only to see the woman had run past him and was busy climbing a tree trying to acquire a hat in a tree. More than likely one of the woman's possessions.

Ben shook his head and continued on his way. As the woman came into his line of sight she was actually waving her arms around lazily, as if trying to summon something or another. Ben was surprised the woman was alive, but he was flabbergasted that the woman was conscious. Unfortunately, the woman seemed to fall unconscious not long after he arrived.

...Totally dead.

Ben crouched down next to her and looked her over. She was small, and young. Long brown hair. He poked her a few times to be sure she wasn't going to be able to chase them down. Nope. Seemed definitely dead-o. One hundred and fifty percent dead. No doubt about it. He lifted her arm off the ground and patted her down. Unfortunately the woman was in her pajamas and had nothing of real value on her save for a few coins and what looked like a wand. Ben unclasped the leather sheath from her being and pulled the wand out of it, looking the item over.

His face contorted into disappointment, but he decided the wand was worth keeping regardless. He slipped it into a pouch in his cloak, and he was about to get up and leave when he Theresa, wearing the hat, knelt down next to him.

"She okay?"

"Dead."

"Ben, she's breathing."

"....way dead."

Theresa shot up to a standing position and swatted at the same spot she had hit earlier. Ben fell onto his ass and rolled onto his back, moaning like a total wimp, both of his hands holding his assaulted cranium.

"Pick her up, Ben. We're taking her back to camp."

Ben did as he was told without question, his other hand still rubbing his head as he lifted the young woman and draped her across his shoulder. As they walked, Theresa's face suddenly contorted into anger.

"You feel that, Ben?"

Ben was quiet for a moment, and he squinted, taking his hand off of his head and holding it palm up in front of him.

"Rain."

Theresa suddenly yelled, grabbing the rim of the witch hat she was wearing and throwing it on the ground in frustration. She quickly realized that the owner of the hat wouldn't appreciate such an act and quickly picked it back up and dusted it off, putting it back on her head.

"Well there goes the fire!"

"I'll kill the fire and grab my stuff. You get your pelt and whatnot in your bag." Ben said, using his tail to crush the flaming logs and smother them. He was fireproof due to his natural abilities, so this action, fortunately, had no affect on him. With his free hand he scooped up his bags and shouldered them.

"I think I saw an enclave not far from here once we left the cave. Just... Follow me." Theresa stated. Ben nodded, and then flicked his head to his friend. An unspoken motion to lead the way.



@SepticGentleman,@Empour
Ah, then I guess I must try harder to work towards the 1000th IC post so I can get the 'Luckiest Fucker' award.


That a challenge, mofo

I am the luckiest fucker to ever fuck.

Come at me.
Theresa ot an Bol'hjar, Benedict Kaspin




When Ben was a young one, he was raised on three morals that you were supposed to uphold around those who you were supposed to care about.

Respect, honor, and generosity.

When Ben got into that boat, whether he was willing to admit it to himself or not, he planned on dying out at sea. He was planning on an unorthodox for of suicide. He didn't expect to survive that storm. He definitely didn't expect to was ashore and meet Theresa. He didn't expect to not only survive, but to live.

So when Theresa told him about the curse, he wasn't worried. When he got the mark, he wasn't worried. If anything he was kinda proud of himself for making such short work of the so called guardians of the island. Ben would admit to himself he could get cocky, and right now he felt like he could escape this continent if he so desired. Because if the vigils couldn't, what would? But he also knew that was arrogant to think, even if it was in the back of his mind. But he didn't want to leave this island. He had met the first friend he had in years here. He had nothing but slave masters before he went off to sea, and those that had raised him had also sold him into said slave master's possession. Theresa was probably the only thing he had worth fighting for right now.

And as tough as he was on the outside and as cold as he could be on the inside, he didn't like seeing her this way. It just didn't sit right with him. He wasn't a big talker, and yet here he was just wishing Theresa would... say something. She was upset and he could tell she was upset and it was making HIM upset that SHE was upset. He wasn't use to this, and he didn't like this. Not one bit. Benedict stopped there in the middle of the woods were they were hiking and cleared his throat in an attempt to get Theresa's attention. Theresa, being attentive despite her inner thoughts, very quickly noticed.

"Ben?" She questioned, her brows furrowing together in confusion. "What's the holdup?"

Ben shook his head and set his bags down. "I think we should set up camp for a while." Ben stated. He looked to the left, and then to the right before his face lit up and he walked away. Theresa watched him, very much confused as the behemoth reptile dragged what looked to be a two or three hundred pound fallen log over to where he had set his inventory. Theresa was perplexed by Ben's sudden and rather mechanical change in mood. From what she had see of him this was... very out of character for him.

"Ben, what's the meaning of this?" She said, stepping closer to where Ben had placed his items and setting down her own, being especially careful to position her broken crossbow away from the other, smaller log Ben was moving next to the large one.

Ben suddenly froze and he slumped some. He set the log down and turned to face her, a frown set into his normally stoney, scaly features.

"I dont like... I dont like seeing you this way." Ben admitted, finding it hard to really talk about how he was feeling about the whole situation. "I dont really know what to do but... going out there and doing more.. might make things worse. Resting some could... help." Ben stated, crossing his arms and tilting his head to the side, seemingly crossed about his whole thought process. He took a few steps closer to her and reached into his pack, taking out a coconut and what looked to be similar to a rolled up bear-skin and tossed them to her. Theresa, being much smaller than Ben, caught the coconut and was promptly draped by the massive skin as it unraveled in the air.

"Sorry." Ben said, trying to hold in a laugh as Theresa indignantly yelled, throwing the skin off of her as if it were some beast attacking her. "Swiped it before we left the cave. Thought you might want something like a sleeping bag." He explained, finally cracking up as Theresa glared hard at him, her face red from a combination of embarrassment and anger. She stalked over and knocked Ben in the bead with her hand as the reptilian man hunched over laughing.

The draconic humanoid shot up fairly quickly, his right hand flying up to shield his head and rub the place where it had been assaulted. He winched as he rubbed the injured spot. This is what he gets for being nice.

"Help me gather some rocks and wood for a campfire, you big baby. Not everyone's a living fire." Theresa said, crossing her arms across he breast and leaning back on one leg. Ben blew a small puff of smoke in her face in retaliation.




"So your crossbow broke, huh?" Ben questioned, reaching down and picking up the very much ruined weapon. Theresa sighed in frustration and poked the logs she had set up for the fire, and turned the duck she had set up on a spin-roast.

"Yeah, that thing must've, crushed it under it's weight when it grabbed me. Glad it was the crossbow and not a rib." She stated, pulling the duck on the stick off of the fire to inspect it, before deciding that it needed to roast longer and placing it back on the makeshift stand. She and Ben had spent far too long trying to actually catch the stupid bird than she was willing to admit. Ben for all of his size, wasn't fast enough to snatch a bird from the air and Theresa couldn't catch a meal worth keeping with her sword and without her crossbow. So the two of them ended up taking rocks they found at a stream and throwing them at birds as they flew over hoping to hit one hard enough to knock it out of the air (instead of diving for fish like any smart person). Surprisingly, of the two of them Theresa was the one to deliver the killing blow- er, rock, and Ben was the one carrying the stones back to their campsite. It would've more than likely ended up that way regardless, but at least the winner of the unspoken challenge had rightfully won their meal and lack of labor.

"Next good town we hit, let me at it for a day or so." Ben said, looking the contraption over one more time. It seemed simple enough similar in theory to the tension weapons his tribe had once employed before he started experimenting with steam technology. "I'll get it back to you, better than new." he stated confidently, grabbing another coconut from his bag and stuffing it into his mouth.

"That a promise?" Theresa challenged, finally pulling the bird off of the fire and taking a bite of it. Something about having caught it, gutted it, and de-feathering it herself made it taste all that much better. "What's the reason behind all the coconuts?"

"Fire is based on some... metal I think my village healer called it. Coconuts and whatnot have a lot of that metal in them."

"Coconuts have metal in them?"

"I dont really believe it either, but it works." Ben stated, crunching down on another coconut.

A comfortable silence befell the two of them once more, but it was broken when Theresa suddenly decided to question him some. "So what's your homeland like, Ben?" Theresa asked, resting her elbow on her knee and turning from the fire to her partner in crime.

Ben stopped chewing, and seemed to think for a minute before answering.

"Very warm during the summers, cold during the winters." he stated. "Lived on a grassland, herded large four legged beasts. My ancestors used to run them down, and used to follow the herds from place to place before my species began agriculture." Ben stated. He spread his arms very wide. "Very few bodies of water, but the ones we did have were as large a seas. Used to catch fish as big as you." he said, his lips curling back into a smile, flashing his teeth.

"Humans would come now and again, used guns and bullets. I was the blacksmith of the village. Learned to invent. Started making weapons to fight back. We started winning some. Made for an unsteady agreement. Humans couldn't do the labor we could. One of us could match twenty of them, but they outnumbered us a hundred to one. Requested some of us for slavery at their homeland." Ben's face suddenly fell.

"The chieftain told me that my name was drawn. Hated to see me go. But I understood. Was my duty." Ben explained, making a few motions with his hands. "Shoveled shit and did hard labor for them for about a decade. Eventually made enough money to buy my own freedom... Stole a ship trying to get home and... you know the story from there." Ben finished, looking over to his friend with a smirk.

"What about you? Seemed like you got caught on your own name when I met you. What's your story?"


@SepticGentleman, @Empour
I hope Ben likes the taste of giant bat things.


If it has the balls to go tangle with something four times it's weight that breathes fire, then the least Ben can do is not be wasteful.

tome


Rip
Danger Cia time! XD


Me too
@Doc Doctor

Magna Pater sounds like my type of woman.
THIS IS A MEETING BETWEEN A GIANT AND TWO SLIGHTLY SMALLER GIANTS.

-@SepticGentleman
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