Vilageidiotx

Comedy On A Thread (Reborn)

Comedy On A Thread (Reborn)

I'm having one of those days

I thought this thread would be more popular.

@Awson

I thought my balls would be more popular too, now 26 years after I got'em and here I am with these unpopular balls.

Hunger Games: Halloween Addition

I saw somewhere earlier here, somebody had said something about creating a list of old winners and running them in some sort of Championship round? Or at least I am pretty sure I seen that, though I don't see it now. Ah well, I already wasted 15 minutes making a list for future reference.

Let's see here, for paste champions we got...

Clocktower Echoes won the Summer Games.

Betty White won the 4th of July Games.

Not So Rare Pepe Trump won the History Games.

Mr. Rogers won the Election Year Games.

The Phantom of the Opera won the Third Starvation Games.

Chapatrap won the Second Starvation Games.

HaleytheRandom won the First Starvation Games.

and I guess technically the first time either Aaron or I did HungerGames here were the Precipice Games won by Sahle.

If there are any other Hunger Games runs done on the RPGuild, they could always be added to the list of champions. Otherwise, the list is 1: Shoryu Magami, 2: Clocktower Echoes, 3: Betty White, 4: Not So Rare Pepe Trump, 5: Mr Rogers, 6: The Phantom of the Opera, 7: Chapatrap, 8: HaleytheRandom, and 9: Sahle.

Precipice of War - We Write Under The Sign Of The Goat

I haven't even looked at RPGuild in like a month.

Still dreaming of a world where we all participate in a perfect RP that never dies and no one ever abandons. But I'm like, the Head Asshat when it comes to abandoning RPs so I'm pretty much half the problem.

@Pepperm1nts

Imagine there's no distractions
It's easy if you try
No youtube below us
Above us only replies
Imagine all the people
Posting every day... Aha-ah...

Imagine there's no Facebook
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to click or veg for
And no reddit, too
Imagine all the people
Living life in the guild... You...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will Arrpee as one

Hunger Games: Halloween Addition

Shoryu won the lawsuit, I see.

@ArenaSnow

i done been wiped out

Hunger Games: Halloween Addition

<Snipped quote by ArenaSnow>

Hell yeah!

(But tbh, if there ever will be a second episode, I'd love to join.)

@Witch Cat

It's become something of a monthly habit. @Dinh AaronMk and I do them back and forth, though I think Aaron is getting a bit bored. It being the holidays it won't be too difficult to come up with themes at least. Anyway...



...Let's do this shit.



Something makes MayLien cry. Is it regret for how she brutally murdered Hollyburst, the sudden realization who she has become as she practices murder? Or is it the Whoppers she received, and that disheartening feeling when you bite into a malted ball and it dawns on you that you wasted your time and money on... this?!

Undertale makes the same tragic mistake ArenaSnow did earlier, discovering to his horror that we don't allow outbound calls in, you know, our enclosed arena.

Skeleton Kid... well, let us review skeleton kid, because I am beginning to love the little rascal. So far, he has...
-Bathed in Jason's blood (okay, not that lovable here).
-Ravenously stuffed his face with candy.
-Did the Time Warp.
-Sent shivers down tsukune's spine.
-Looked so silly that Gary Johnson died from laughing at him.
-Teamed up with X-Tan to throw toilet paper over the Hooplah Fish's house.
-Jumped out and scared the Hoolpah Fish.
-Made a deal with the devil.
-Traded candy with Shoryu, Hollyburst, the Cockle, and tsukune.
-Followed Undertale and me and helped us sacrifice Mike Myers to the old gods (This wouldn't be lovable if it weren't for the little-brother way he joined up with us.
-He did the Time Warp again.
-And now he leaves a burning bag of dog turds on Shoryu's trademark-pending front porch.
I dunno, I just get a rascally little kid vibe from him. Easily the comic relief of this game.

Shifty tries to cross a river and drowns. Some say it was the ghost of the cock-jammed cockle, back in its environment and out for revenge beyond the clam-bake.

Then I, uh, pass out. Which isn't a surprise. I have been pretty fucking busy this season.



The alliance between myself and Undertale has clearly fallen apart and we go our own ways. Undertale gets lost in the corn. Shoryu, having received dog chocolate from Skeleton Kid the night before, receives real chocolate. Question is will he trust it?

But then, goddammit Skeleton Kid, I was just starting to like you. Did you have to kill me? I pass out, wake up in a closet, and find myself besieged by a Time-Warp-doing Skeleton Kid, who murders me right there before I can get my bearings.

The last thing, MayLien being phone, might not be that interesting in the face of it, but there is a deep and mysterious connection to be made. I'll outline what I mean...

Day 2: Hank is phone.
Night 3: Final Fantasy imagines what MayLien would look like in a Hank costume.
Day 4: Hank and Final Fantasy attend the same satanic ritual, where they both (along with Broby and ArenaSnow) kill themselves.
Day 6: MayLien is phone.

... so here is what I contend: I think that Final Fantasy, wishing so badly for MayLien to become like Hank, arranged the Satanic ritual with not only Hank but two other victims so it could implore the headless dark lord to intercede on the earthly plain again and make MayLien into Hank. The experiment succeeded; Hank was phone, now MayLien is phone.



There goes the two of us, Shifty and Me. He is drowned by the returned ghost of Cockle, and I am trapped by the thus-far lovable skeleton kid. That leaves alive Undertale, Skeleton Kid, Shoryu, and MayLien (who is phone).



The Undertale-Vilage alliance isn't completely dead, and the game who joined me to murder Michael Myers and coordinate attack against the others comes back from its cornfield adventure. I am guessing I must have fought back and wounded Skeleton Kid, or else too much time warp simply tuckered him out dancing-plague style, because Undertale finds Skeleton Kid already dying.

Then poor MayLien's short reign as phone ends when Shoryu kills her for a pack of fucking whoppers, the most pointless murder in the entire game and all it's iterations.

That means it is time to find out who wins. Before you open this hider, think in your mind who you want to take the prize: Shoryu, or Undertale. Meditate on it, maybe reread so you can fall in love and/or hate with the characters before their final fight. Then...

...open!

The Winner

Congratulations Shoryu! I know you didn't even want to be here, but somehow you took that tepid distaste and turned it into a win!

Endgame Stats

Now, one thing I have to note about these stats is that, when I set up suicides, I count them as 1 kill. This complicates group suicides because the game only allows you to designate "Killer" and "Killed", and though you can designate somebody as both, you cannot specify who killed who. This means that everybody who participated in a group suicide will be credited with the death of everybody in the group, meaning the game's kill count will add up to a number much greater than the number of participants. Imma have to remember not to credit group suicides next time, or to stop including them all together.

The Unpopular Opinions Thread.

Oh also, politics really has no place in casual conversation. Especially the tired, tedious issue of american politics when you live in fucking Canada and can't vote in the US anyway. Didn't your mama ever tell you that it's impolite to talk about politics in mixed company?

@Obscene Symphony

Be glad you aren't in America. People stealing signs, somebody I worked with had their anti-trump bumper sticker smashed with a hammer, the local congressmen is running around planting his signs in everybody's yards without their permissions. I think half of everybody is dreading Thanksgiving.

What Book(s) Are You Reading?

Storm of Steel by Ernst Junger. I just got done reading a little local ghost book (Missouri Ghosts, 2nd Edition) since it is October. Next will be the last volume of The Civil War: A Narrative by Shelby Foote.

The Call of Cthullu and Other Stories, H.P. Lovecraft
I'd never read Lovecraft so I decided to pick this up as a good spooky read for the Halloween season. This one is probably the most disappointing book I'm reading now.

Yup. Infamously unimpressive writer, gets used as an example of what not to do in style guides all the time. What he had was an impressive imagination, not so much an impressive pen.

Christianity in RP?

Catholicism is the traditional vehicle for this sort of thing since it has a broader mythology than Protestantism. That's where you'll get all your good saints and hierarchy of angels stuff. You can do Protestantism too, it's just way simpler and most of it nixes the hierarchy of heaven. There is always the other branches, but that'd take deeper research for a modern westerner, whereas using Catholicism or Protestantism gives you a bit of a boost since western culture is so built upon those religions that you'll find a lot of it familiar.

It might not be a bad idea to get a hold of a bible. Even read the mutha if you have time, though I can tell you from experience that reading the bible front to back as a non-believer can get a bit dull. If you are not getting that serious though, just having one handy wouldn't be a bad idea.

Also check out all the little books that fell between the cracks. Things that Jews, Gnostics, or the Ethiopians have adopted, because that's where a lot of the back-story you see in stuff like Supernatural comes from.

If you want to check out some lighter reading that can help you with the subject matter, check out Dante's Inferno and Paradise Lost. These are not as old and stilted as the religious texts themselves, and they play an important role in shaping how we perceive the larger Christian mythology. Dante's Inferno creates a specific map of the after-life that people have been reusing since it came out, and Paradise Lost basically game us the modern perspective on Lucifer that has been replayed in fiction ever since.