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Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by ruronihs
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Name: Ryozan Tanzo
Title: Tōketsuha, the “Frozen Blade.”
Age: 17
Gender: Male

Appearance:


Personality: Self-improvement is the very core of Ryozan’s philosophy, and so he is a diligent workaholic. When he cannot practice his swordsmanship or ninjutsu without damaging his body, he pushes his mind by studying various forms of strategy and tactics. Unfortunately, he spends little time practicing his social skills and he is often more harsh than he means to be when speaking with people. Likewise, when he is in battle, he can seem to be a bit more ferocious than a normal person ought to be. Despite his desire to acquire more and more strength, he never flaunts his power against the weak, which has led to his ambivalence about the empire…

Recent History: Ryozan has recently been made a Jounin in recognition of his superior skills and for an impromptu rescue operation. A team of Jounin was ambushed by a rebel attack and they were seriously injured. Ryozan happened to be near them and devised a plan to get them to safety on the fly while carrying one of them on his back. None of them died. One of these shinobi was a recruitment officer who took an interest in Ryozan's abilities. Not long afterward, he received an invitation for an interview with the officer and a chance to receive a rank in the Empress's army. While the tone of the letter was pleasant, Ryozan knew that failure to respond would result in a far less pleasant second invitation. He had stayed out of politics up until this point, but now it seems as though he will have to take sides.

Allegiance: Neutral, though the clock is ticking.

Chakra Nature: Ice, Air

Rank: Jounin

Jutsu: Fubuki no Jutsu – A frigid blast of ice and wind. Shards of ice can cut the target, and the wind can freeze most targets if they are exposed for more than a few seconds.

Mō Fubuki no Jutsu – A swirling gale of ice and wind that surrounds Ryozan. Essentially an AoE Fubuki no Jutsu, but the high chakra drain prevents prolonged use.

Kōri Kasui no Jutsu – A hard, piercing spike of ice shoots out of the ground. Can be varied in size and number, and can either shoot out or remain rooted to the ground.

Kōri Sesshoku no Jutsu – A close-range jutsu that freezes a target that Ryozan comes in direct contact with.

Kekkei Genkai: Seiryu no Kawa – Ryozan’s body becomes covered in rock-hard scales of ice. The scales are also razor-sharp and can be used offensively as well. The drawback is that this technique is close range only and since he covers his body he can no longer use his Kōri Sesshoku.

Skills: Expert with a katana, especially iaijutsu. Well versed in tactics and intelligence acquisition. A pro at Shogi and Mahjong.

Tools: His katana. A notebook and writing utensil.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Masaki Haruna
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Masaki Haruna OLD TESTAMENT

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Name: Uchiha Sayaka
Title: Red Eyed,Silver Flamed Blazing Hunter, Silver Hunter for short
Age: 21
Gender: Female
Appearance:

Personality:
An enigma for better or worst, a true Shinobi who endures and conceals her emotions. Sayaka is all about the rules and getting things done, she doesn't like having anyone in her way, she is seen cold and cynical, only loyal to her clan and village. She is more or less silent in the exterior but deep inside, is the agony and pain of solitude, she condemns herself and eventually she grew tired of killing.Sayaka's true personality, is level headed, less colder, calm and passively kind, she socializes more and talks more but still shows less attachment. At her very best, she has a habit of eating a lot and playing guitars for it makes her light up.

Allegiance: Neutral

Recent History:
Never before seen in the Uchiha to use an unusual fire style jutsu, Sayaka took it to a whole new level of manipulation. By controlling the properties of fire, she is able to conjunct it with Taijutsu and Kenjutsu. This feat allowed her to fight toe to toe against the finest opposing ninjas from different nations and recently she is able to advance her flames to a whole new level, literally, silver flames, a jutsu that is dangerous for its manipulation. One of the known Kunoichi to wield a Sharingan and fight on par with Uchihas that uses MS.

Chakra Nature: Fire
Rank: Jounin
Jutsu:
S Rank, Gin No En(Silver Flames).
-Most of Sayaka's jutsu are derived from her silver flames, the flame enables her advanced manipulation of properties of fire techniques which follows as burning rate, barriers, sharpness, and shaping. Overall this silver flame's weakness has always been the opposing element, water and can be countered by all means, water can counter it, however, it is just harder to put the flames out. Silver flames is extremely weaker than the black flamed, Amaterasu and its nowhere near its power. The following are silver variants:

Sazanami. Known as flame cutter, it sends off blazing sharp silver projectiles that is limited to 5 meters range. The property of this variant is sharpness along with hotness, it may not be as sharp as lightning and wind nature but its damage is strong enough to melt steel and concrete. This is one of her jutsu that is normal flame but cloaked and enhanced with silver flames.

Gin-Dansei Gamu(Silver Elastic Gum). The property of the silver flame changes into a flexible and sticky substance, it is less hotter and doesn't burn but more controlled. Water is still the weakness, this variant enables the user whipping hits like a Sting Ray's tail or dozen of bee stinging you.

Silver Jail. The property of silver flames changes into a tattoo property. Like a curse mark, it is like fire ants biting you, the more you struggle, the hotter it gets but if you keep still enough, the jutsu will end. A handful of people easily fall prey for this trick due to the tattoo being a swarm of silver ants. This variant is a sealing jutsu type due to its after effects of not staying still, the target will be petrified for they turn into a silver flame statue which lasts for five minutes. This variant is the most foul that Sayaka possess in her silver arsenal. Water will not save the target but a reverse sealing jutsu would, tiger, ox, monkey, clap, snake, crane, monkey, tiger is the code.

Forbidden Silver, God of Atonement(Sealing Jutsu)
Literally, a true ninja is not about Michael Bay explosions. This silver variant is a one shot deal and it can only be used with a metallic weapon, a chain is the best component for this technique to take effect. If the target gets hold of the chain, a curse mark will appear in his or her chest to where the heart is. The user will give three conditions which are known as chances, if the target lies for the first time, burning takes place, the second time, it gets hotter and if they lie for the third and last chance, they die by being incinerated from the inside. A true ninja interrogation technique indeed, this technique cannot be spammed since it takes half of the user's chakra and weakens her to the point of dehydration.

Sayaka cannot shroud herself with Silver Flames for Nintaijutsu because it will harm her.

Non Silver related
Are normal flames with the usual normal color.
Shinku, a fire wave propelled released from the user's hand with a range of 5 meters.
Hien, a Kenjutsu Katon, it releases a slash of flames of 8 meters.
Guren Odachi. An A Rank jutsu that slash n burns at its path, concentrated flames with a range of 15 meters. It is like how the Samurai releases their chakra slashes but this jutsu releases one big crescent flame slash. This jutsu is like Katon: Goukamekyaku due to its wide spread and it can be countered by 10 people using water wall.
Great Fireball, all Uchiha have this.

Forbidden Technique,Rising Sun.
An orb of flames that is focused one point, this is one of Sayaka's deadliest fire jutsu. A forbidden technique that is based on how much injuries/damage does the user take from its enemy. The more damage she gets from her opponent, the Sun's return will be equivalent to the total damage thus the rising sun grows bigger. Burning anything in its vicinity, 10 meter radius, the property of this silver variant is killing. This jutsu is a dangerous and risky technique for it is like "I'm taking you with me to hell." It is impractical to use this on battle due to how much chakra it takes to use it, it takes proper execution and decision on when to use it. It is a forbidden jutsu after all, therefore, the user won't think of spamming it or using it conveniently, a true ninja must have a suicidal technique.

Non silver flames are like fire blade, fire shield and normal fire manipulation, Katon, Nintaijutsu.

Taijutsu, the assassin techniques
Afterimage. Mistaken to be a clone technique, this is just sheer speed, the faster the user gets, they are able to project false clones and images of themselves.

Claws. The claw technique, making your claws sharp enough to kill a person barehandedly.

Silent Killer. Move silently without being heard, concealing your chakra to a certain extent, limit is one minute.

Skills:
The Way of an Assassin .
Likewise it makes her go for the kill and specializes in stealth and infiltration, makes one wonder why would she use fire element over lightning element. It is because, fire leaves no trace of evidence. She applies this fighting style as her default Taijutsu style. Not only does it helped her in Taijutsu, this combat made her more disciplined and restraint by not showing off her full capabilities and prevents enemies from getting intel about her.

Chain Specialist.
Literally, these are not chakra chains. Sayaka is able to use chains as a weapon of constricting and restraining. If used with chakra, she is able to perform better and use her chains as a shield. She uses her chains with fire jutsu, inspired by Kratos from God of War and Ghost Rider of Marvel.

Interrogation.
Do not lie to her, ever. She will torture you the worst and twisted ways, not only that, subtle interrogation is also applicable and less dangerous. Just don't piss her off for she will resort using God of Atonement on you. Sayaka developed her interrogation skills on her own.

Keen Intellect.
Before using ninjutsu or anything jutsu related, Sayaka would first use her conversational skills and keen observation to know what she is up against. She has outsmarted few Uchiha who uses Mangekyou Sharingan when she wasn't even using her sharingan, outsmarted them by using information against them like family as well as she is able to outsmart them by just talking. An intellectual approached can be done by formulating hypothesis and experimenting.

Tools:
Basic Ninja Tools.
Kusarigama.
Chains.
Wires.
Murasame.
Needles.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Chev
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Chev The Pecking Order

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Workiing on a character now. I'll post it when I get home.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Yog Sothoth
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Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Piercing Light
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ruronihs, before your temp is accepted, I'll need you to edit the bit about Empress Shoko. I'll be controlling that character, so her actions aren't up for interpretation. You can say a recruitment officer or something sent him the invitation instead.

Masaki Haruna, Your temp is accepted.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by ruronihs
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Ok, did the edit.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Piercing Light
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ok, but also this line. "The Empress has a finite amount of patience and is not inclined to let Ryozan become a threat to her power."

is presuming things about the character. Just fix that and your temp is accepted.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by chukklehed
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chukklehed Sorcerer Supreme with a medium rootbeer

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I wish to dance
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Piercing Light
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Tsukiko is accepted.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Chev
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Name: Karela Yatoma
Title:
Age: 17
Sexuality: Lesbian
Gender: Female
Appearance:

Personality: Karela is cold when it comes to her enemies. Ice Cold. She shows absolutely no remorse or mercy when fighting unless she sees an opportunity to either bring her opponent over to her side or she sees a way to use that opponent later on in the future for something she needs. She can be warm and friendly to her friends but that side of her is very rarely shown.

Recent History: Karela's clan was executed years ago when they staged a peaceful protest against the Empire who responded with overwhelming force. Karela was barely able to escape the slaughter of her clan and was forced to hide in the dark corners of Konoha after being badly injured during the slaughter of her clan. Karela's mind was shattered by the loss of her clan and her heart turned cold. She was and still is incapable of trusting anyone and she refuses to submit to the Empire. In particular, she is incapable of trusting men or forming relationships with them due to the men who led the attack on her clan's home.

Over the years, she has honed her body into a weapon. A deadly weapon. At times over the years she has managed to sneak out of the village to take out the occasional Imperial solder, always leaving the same message on their bodies in order to show that she will not forget and will not forgive, that she will not stop until her home is free and her clan avenged.

Revenge

Allegiance: Rebels/Konoha

Chakra Nature: Wind/Earth

Rank: Chunin

Jutsu:
Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu
Earth Barrier jutsu ((Creates a wall of earth between herself and an attacker.))
Rasengan ((No shadow clone required.))
Enveloping Earth Coffin (( Creates a wall of stone and earth around a target and envelopes them, cutting off oxygen. Can be used to crush an opponent.))
Exploding Earth coffin ((Same as above except exploding tags and kunai cover the coffin and explode after a few moments.))

Skills: Expert fighter and tactical planner.

Tools: Kunai pouch, exploding kunai knives and regular kunai knives, smoke bombs and a large Shurkien pouch filled with Shuriken
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Lyfe
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Lyfe

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Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Yog Sothoth
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.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by SoleAccord
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I'll be working on an Empire character and he'll be up within a day or two if all goes well.

Lyfe said -insert template here-


Refused. Asked specifically to go over this by Piercing Light while he prepares his templates.

My biggest issue and not necessarily his, was your history. Ninshuu became Ninjutsu over time with the original teachings of the Sage being pretty much lost, yet a wealthy man with no direct tie to a shinobi lifestyle has all these people carrying on the original teachings and you even claim the Sage's relatives, which there shouldn't really be any, are teaching a bunch of kids the original teachings. This wasn't the worst, but it goes to show that you're stressing your self-importance a lot more with this.

Moving on, you master kenjutsu by twelve, which is REALLY bold to say, but still not my biggest issue here. So this wealthy guy adopts your character, lets you learn from the best, and takes care of you with no dark motives implied whatsoever. Your character repays this by murdering everyone there including the man, going on to murder the rest of the people without just cause, but the icing on the cake had to be him going BACK to his orphanage to burn alive all of those kids and the people that took care of him before with, once again, no just cause provided. On top of this, he hunts down his entire family, once again no justification provided in doing it. So after he murders all these people, so far reason unfounded, he decides he wants to ...change the world and 'revolutionize' how shinobi communicate. Then Empire wipes them out. Alright.

So we go from harsh beginnings child, to child who is a prodigy and masters things quickly, to murderous young man that kills people who never wronged him and most of his family, to ex-assassin member. Now I can take it to this point, but then you moved on to something that made no sense to me whatsoever. Your character works in Konoha now as a 'mercenary' when they have an able military force already. On top of this, he's 14 at the time, and I don't think Konoha is so desperate as to use a 14 year old mercenary. This might've worked on villages that were much more down on their luck if he traveled, but I can't exactly see Konoha using him. This is where I begin to fall apart on believing this story. Besides how HARD you've tried to make this guy a tragic character when most of the tragedy was caused by himself, you decide that Konoha somehow believes a guy unaffiliated with Konoha will enter their elite unit and lead it within a year.

Huh?

Okay, if Konoha doesn't background check this kid, which I think they would've if he walked into the village with arms, then you might've had a chance to get away with it. But you're implying that they are SO lax and carefree about who they allow to represent them on missions that they will take this murderous young guy and put them on ANBU with no questions asked. You've made it clear in your template that his only allegiance is to himself and his loyalty is only to himself. Couple this loner attitude with no loyalty to Konoha nor relation to it, and throw in a little murderous background, and you'd find that no one sane would take this kid and put them on their elite units, only the desperate ones would. Kenji Uchiha would NOT allow this guy anywhere in ANBU, consider it lucky he'd even be allowed to remain in the village given he has murdered innocent people. I would know because he's my character. This won't work for you, Konoha is not depraved and desperate enough to let a murderous cutthroat represent them. He is unapologetic about everything he's done over the years and holds no remorse for the people he killed in his early years. You can be a renown swordsman all you'd like, but what he's done isn't tolerated there. Rework your history to be a little more sensible please because its all over the place.

Your KG-stealing butterfly I'm iffy on but Piercing said its passable, but you cannot take doujutsu, this means no temporary Sharingan, Byakugan, anything of the sort. Also keep in mind having the capacity to perform techniques doesn't immediately imply you know how they all work either. You probably should've detailed that much better.

Your canon techniques are acceptable given your theme, but your custom ones kill it from here. I'm all for creativity in templates and I feel the more creative you are in templates, the better received you will be in the eyes of your peers. But the central issue is that some people attempt to do too much at once and it comes off as tryhard and obnoxious. I'm cool with one or two jutsu not demanding handsigns given in Naruto they dropped the idea that high-level techniques demanded plenty of handsigns, but you do way too much and its to the point you can literally oneshot a character before they even know what happens.

We can't look at you or we're in a genjutsu. We can't look at your weapons or we're in a genjutsu. If we're hit once we suffer for a long time and it feels like absolute murder to the point a papercut feels like 'death'. In other words you make it almost impossible to ever enjoy a fight with you, and this is the flaw with genjutsu in general. Genjutsu isn't a 'fun' concept and thus we don't see it often in canon because its not exciting to deal with, and a chore for anyone to fight. Your entire theme makes it so you combine Genjutsu and swordplay. Okay. Cool. Yet its to the point that we need to keep away from you at all times to have any chance at fighting you, and even then by looking at you we're in a genjutsu again, so where is the fun factor here? YES, YES we could dispell the genjutsu, but before we know it we're in another one, and so we need to keep dispelling it or lose each time.

So you have ALL these tools to be relevant in every situation, and on top of this have a magical butterfly that can just take someone's dna and chakra, and you have access to their techniques and arguably their KG? I've seen templates like this before, Piercing Light has seen templates like this before, and let me tell you: its not fun to deal with people like this on a competitive level where even if we have the means to win, we still lose because you create jutsu and circumstances that don't allow you to be outclassed. The identity of your character is jumbled, and your moveset is a nightmare and hair-pulling doesn't begin to express the sheer irritation we would feel by competing with you at any point.

You hype him up from birth as some godlike figure who can do anything better than most people, yet at 14-15 he has to suddenly work hard for 9 months straight to do something good? So from genius to hard worker. You take him from a tragic background into a lifestyle that makes him comfortable and knowledgeable, and then you make him tragic again by destroying everyone he ever knew and didn't wrong him? So tragic, to second chance, to self-tragic again.

You do not seem to know what you want to do with this character other than hype up your self-importance, and BY NO MEANS IS THIS JUST YOU! Other templates submitted have hyped up their self-importance and in the world of Naruto this isn't anything unusual. But your moveset is anti-fun, your history and allegiance doesn't add up at the 'endgame' and he'd likely never find a place in Konoha's military unless there was some redemption he had planned but he's the cause of most of his own tragedy so I don't see how this struggle is going to come into the rp. He doesn't have remorse for anything he's done, so there's no growth to come from what he's done before this rp even starts. So he has no means to grow either. He's just some 'bad ass' you hyped up and there's absolutely nothing to be done with him other than grit your teeth and struggle through an endless genjutsu war. And you even had to make him a sensor too. So we can't even HIDE from this guy if we wanted to. Zero weakness in almost every situation imaginable, he will always be relevant. You intended for him to be recognized as someone powerful and incredible, congratulations, he's too powerful and his 'incredible' aspects don't allow any growth to come from interactions. What's left for him?

Fix some of the issues I've mentioned and try again. If my analysis is too harsh for you and you no longer wish to join the group, then you're free to do that too.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Innue
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Innue Sheep God

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This is still SUPER WIP.

Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Innue
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How long ago was the creation of the empire? This isn't listed and it would help for developing my history.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Piercing Light
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No one knows when they were created, however they've been active for 1 year and 6 months.
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Piercing Light said
No one knows when they were created, however they've been active for 1 year and 6 months.


Thanks, that is what I needed (just the formal 'we've taken most of the stuff over and declared it' time).
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Name: Natsumi Uchiha (This character does not count towards the character limit)
Title: The Elegant Phoenix of Konoha, The 9-tails of Konoha.
Age: 16
Gender: Female

Appearance: Natsumi stands at a height of five feet nine inches tall. Her hair color resembles the color of fresh grass, being a dark green. Her hair's length goes down to just below her shoulders, and is brushed back. Her hair is slightly curly, resulting in the edges of her hair curving upwards, giving her hair an appearance akin to feathers. Natsumi's face appears a tad older than her age would have you believe; she has mature narrow eyes, with slender cheeks and jawline. Her eyes are naturally black, changing of course when she activates her Kekkei Genkai. Her mouth and nose are subtle, not drawing much attention as they are rather averagely sized and small respectively. She has a curvaceous figure, which is slightly toned due to her training as a ninja. More often than not she wears light makeup, using subtly colored lipstick and blush to give her face a more elegant appearance. Natsumi's voice is soft spoken and silky smooth, matching her usual mood. For clothing, she tries to live up to the Yamato Nadeshiko principle, meaning she dresses in extravagant kimonos and colorful robes.

Personality: Right off the bat Natsumi comes off as a kind individual. She's not one to lose her temper easily, and more often than not she can be seen with a smile on her face. Her mannerisms tell of her refined up bringing, she sits properly, walks properly, and speaks properly. As she considers herself an elegant young woman, she takes it upon herself to set a good example. Even though she is a ninja, and she knows what that entails, Natsumi is quite sociable. Long ago she made it a goal to become friends with nearly everyone in the village, because of this, she is well known in Konoha as 'the Sun of our Fire.' Depending on how you see her, Natsumi is either a very optimistic, or very naive girl. She refuses to believe that the world needs to be as painful as it is, and as such she has a disdain for killing. Even in the midst of it, she believes that peace can occur between those at war.

Recent History: At a very young age, Natsumi had the 9-tailed fox demon sealed within her. This made her a weapon in the eyes of the village, and as such she was left alone either through respect or fear in her early years. As she grew older, Natsumi realized what was happening, and made it a goal to become the type of person that could be looked at not with fear, but pleasure. Years later, the Empire attacked. Natsumi was taken away by the Empress, however, she came back unlike other Jinchuriki that had been taken. She claimed to have 'talked' it out with Shoko Izakami, and that she would be allowed to live as long as she did not cause trouble for the Empire.

Allegiance: Rebels within Konoha

Chakra Nature: Fire, Wind

Rank: Chuunin

Jutsu:

Kekkei Genkai: Sharingan

Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique
Fire Release: Phoenix Sage Fire Technique
Wind Release Stream
Wind Release: Wind Cutter Technique
Blade of Wind

Fire Release: Righteous Immolation: A jutsu that was used in the past to set one's self ablaze in a ritualistic manner. The jutsu was a ruse however, as it actually does no harm to the user. Natsumi uses this jutsu in combination with her fire and wind nature for a variety of her attacks, and is the basis for her Phoenix Style. When in use, this jutsu covers the users body entirely in raging flames.

Phoenix Style: A style of fighting that Natsumi invented. After using Righteous Immolation, wind is used to strengthen the flames, making them take over a much larger area of space around her, around three times her width and height. This style affects her physical attacks as well as various jutsu. Attacks from her body or weapons will burn her foe, and wind attacks will have a searing effect added, causing wind to burn through people and objects like a hot knife through butter. This style also allows Natsumi to fly, reaching speeds of up to 30 MPH normally. Simply getting close to Natsumi is dangerous while she uses this technique, as the flames emitting from her act as an offensive defense.

Skills: Natsumi is skilled in Tessenjutsu; the martial art of the japanese war fan, and Kenjutsu; sword techniques.

Tools: Akahane (Red Feathers) A pair of crimson feathered war fans. Underneath the delicate appearing covering of red feathers, the fans are composed of a hard metallic material with one edge sharpened with a blade like curve. These two fans can be combined to form a feathered katana.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Chev
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Just out of curiosity, is Karela approved?
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by SoleAccord
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Chev said
Just out of curiosity, is Karela approved?


Karela is accepted.

Just because people are confused I'll say this: Unless you happen to be a missing-nin and already in the Bingo Book, your ranks are the typical Genin,Chuunin,Jounin, etc or whatever rank you held in your village. Only put letters like S,A,B and C in there if that's the level you're in in the Bingo Book.
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