Sketcher said
Just to put it out there; I edited and added the story about Konoe(the swordmaster)'s death. Not because I'm expecting more feedback so quickly, just saying it :)I wouldn't want to be greedy, now would I? :(

Thank you for your cooperation. You're in.

Thanks! I'm looking forward to this! ^.^

What's wrong with greedy? *Absently pats bulging coin purse of stolen septims while thinking about piles of precious gems at home*

Also did you not see my PM Sole or did you just have no reply?

chukklehed said
Also did you not see my PM Sole or did you just have no reply?

I got back to you just now.

chukklehed said
What's wrong with greedy? *Absently pats bulging coin purse of stolen septims while thinking about piles of precious gems at home*Also did you not see my PM Sole or did you just have no reply?

Stop stealing septims. *turns into a werewolf*

ok Tuuj, a few things.

Grace of the Wind God: Path of the Ascetic - This seems to be a shield jutsu that's able to block nearly any kind of attack, with the justification that she's unable to move while using it. However from what I can tell it doesn't take that long to use it, and it can protect her from all angles. So, technically speaking, it can used on the fly to easily nullify an attack of any magnitude. I believe the length to prepare it should be longer, or the area that it protects should be lessened (like only protecting her front) or it should be something that she can only use once per battle.

Grace of the Wind God: Spiritual Armour - Considering this prevents the use of other jutsu, I believe it's ok, however I think it's blocking of projectiles should be more clear. Perhaps only being able to block small projectiles, And I'm also assuming she can still take damage from direct physical attacks and ninjutsu?

Wind God’s Sanctuary - I think you should only be able to use this once per battle.

Wind God’s Divine Whirlwind: Tempest - How long does this last? I'd think anymore than 10 seconds would be a bit too long for winds that are impossible to escape from.

Wind God’s Divine Whirlwind: Hurricane - Were you keeping in mind that only 2 jutsu will be allowed per post? just how long do these combo based jutsu last? also "none of Windspeaker Touho’s techniques require Symbols of Fuujin to be used." That's a no go.

Tears of the Wind God - Limit this to one orb per five minutes.

Judge Unworthy - lol was I the only one that thought Kisame's water prison jutsu was OP as hell? Can you remove this one? I'm just not comfortable with this one, sorry.

Heavenly Array of Frost - How fast does this sphere move? Because I think something that can instantly turn someone into a block of ice shouldn't be moving too fast.

Rite of Frostfall - Due to this being an S ranked jutsu, she won't be able to combo it with another jutsu. However, you can go ahead and give it the full power, as long as this jutsu takes a heavy toll on her, not allowing any other powerful jutsu afterwards.

Sudden Frostfall - 30 feet isn't that short really, and considering this jutsu covers a 360 degree range I'd say it completely freezing whatever it hits is a bit much.

AeronFarron said
Stop stealing septims. *turns into a werewolf*

NEVER! *Sneak 100*

*WEREWOLF SMASH!*

AeronFarron said
Not wanting to step on your toes, but just giving you a heads up: My character can understand hornets and has a summon contract with hornets.

Actually AeronFarron, your character's ability to understand hornets makes no difference. Understanding them means nothing, nor does your summoning contract with said hornets. As long as you're not summoning Red Chimeran Hornets, we should be on the same page. Summoning contracts do not give one control over the thing summoned at all, usually it is an understanding between the summoner and the thing summoned. Not to mention it doesn't give one control over something that someone else summoned, even if it is the same species. Ex. Aoda & Sasuke and Gamakichi & Jiraiya. Compare and contrast to Sasuke & Manda. And simulating their pheremones doesn't give you any level of control over them. FYI.

I think he means you do the same thing, not that he can control your character.

SoleAccord said
Please tell us how much chakra the queen demands to mass produce that fast, the pros outweigh the cons but I just want to know how much it takes to make this technique happen. As far as skills go, you have way too much. Not even Itachi or Kakashi could have all those perks and they were geniuses in their own right. Going to ask you to remove at least a couple of those, perhaps the 'master strategist' bit and maybe the 'physically more powerful than appears' bit. People like filling in a lot of holes in their characters arsenal, but I ask that you not make your character a master of just about everything at 17 years old. No matter how hard he was beaten, you can't excel in every category.

Itachi and Kakashi would easily have far more perks. Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, Genjutsu, Kenjutsu, Excellent accuracy, Stealth. That is just to name a few. Both were extremely skilled in almost all forms of combat, period. Being 'physically more power than one appears to be' is not the equivalent of being super humanly strong, it simply means you look weaker than you are which is a matter of general perception and labeling. Oh and he was only a master at strategy, but you want me to change that. O.o The amount of chakra the queen requires is proportionate to how many eggs she births. If you're looking for me to say it takes a tremendous amount of chakra, I won't. Wouldn't make much sense if I did. I've edited the 'master strategist' part to be 'exceptional strategist' if it makes you more comfortable.

Lawless said
Itachi and Kakashi would easily have far more perks. Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, Genjutsu, Kenjutsu. Both were extremely skilled in almost all forms of combat, period. Being 'physically more power than one appears to be' is not the equivalent of being super humanly strong, it simply means you look weaker than you are which is a matter of general perception and labeling. Oh and he was only a master at strategy, but you want me to change that. O.o The amount of chakra the queen requires is proportionate to how many eggs she births. If you're looking for me to say it takes a tremendous amount of chakra, I won't. Wouldn't make much sense if I did. I've edited the 'master strategist' part to be 'exceptional strategist' if it makes you more comfortable.

I'm not going to debate with you the measure of a canon characters abilities at 17 with your OC, I'm asking you to erase some 'skills' you've created because you have a lot for the age group you're in. I misinterpreted the strength bit. You simply have too much going for your character, and we're asking you nicely to remove some things to help balance him out.

I'm asking you how much chakra it would take to spur the queen, with your limit already there on how many she can create at a time. And you seem pretty dead set on arguing this, so me and Pierce decided that removing Swordsmanship and Large Chakra Reserve are more than fair considering your wide range of skills. Can you at least compromise there ...because if not I guess we've got a problem.

Tetsujin, Iyana still needs a review. Not to annoy or anything ^_^;

SoleAccord said
I'm not going to debate with you the measure of a canon characters abilities at 17 with your OC, I'm asking you to erase some 'skills' you've created because you have a lot for the age group you're in. I misinterpreted the strength bit. You simply have too much going for your character, and we're asking you nicely to remove some things to help balance him out. I'm asking you how much chakra it would take to spur the queen, with your limit already there on how many she can create at a time. And you seem pretty dead set on arguing this, so me and Pierce decided that removing Swordsmanship and Large Chakra Reserve are more than fair considering your wide range of skills. Can you at least compromise there ...because if not I guess we've got a problem.

You were the one that brought up both Kakashi and Itachi. I wasn't trying to debate you, but you are most certainly wrong about each of them not having that many or more perks. Most certainly. Otherwise you just generally didn't watch the show, which would make your argument understandable. It seems to me that you are more so dead set on limiting my character unreasonably. Large chakra reserve is a bit much but to restrict my character from wielding a sword? What? That makes little to no sense. My character would strictly become a hornet using Shino which is not what my character is. Oh and my character doesn't have a wide range of skills. Earth Release, Carnivorous hornets, and wielding a sword. ._. And you're trying to restrict me from doing that. Makes no sense. You say I have a lot for my age group, yet you didn't suggest changing my age at all. *sighs* And this other guy thinks they are going to just up and control my hornets simply cause she can summon her own. ._. Friggin just posted my CS.

But we won't have any problems. Ugh, Just gotta edit. I'll see if I can think of a way to explain how much chakra is used more thoroughly in some sort of measurement system.

Lawless said Just gotta edit.

Indeed.

Yosh, sorry about that, we'll get to you.

Lawless said
Actually AeronFarron, your character's ability to understand hornets makes no difference. Understanding them means nothing, nor does your summoning contract with said hornets. As long as you're not summoning Red Chimeran Hornets, we should be on the same page. Summoning contracts do not give one control over the thing summoned at all, usually it is an understanding between the summoner and the thing summoned. Not to mention it doesn't give one control over something that someone else summoned, even if it is the same species. Ex. Aoda & Sasuke and Gamakichi & Jiraiya. Compare and contrast to Sasuke & Manda. And simulating their pheremones doesn't give you any level of control over them. FYI.

Pheromones are incredibly important to hornets as a species. Natural hornets don't speak and don't really communicate with motions or verbal cues. They communicate primarily via pheromones. So if my character can simulate and manipulate the very thing all hornets use as communication, that is a lot more control than you think. She can easily simulate a "friendly" pheromone, which given the aggressive nature of the hornets you've created, would be incredibly powerful. Their basic instinct would tell them to leave her alone.

Aggression in insects and animals (humans included) typically means that they don't have cognitive responses, they don't stop and analyze, they follow their basic nature. Couple a horde mindset (which they seem to have) with a base nature, add in extreme aggression, and the fact that they are not summons: they probably identify friend or foe as well as attack commands by pheromones.

Now, I'll forgive you not reading my temp before you formulated your response. Had you done so, you'd have seen that the largest species of hornets (that I've made and was accepted) for Hornet summons had chosen to become her signature summons and to basically raise her. Her kekkei genkai evolved, over time, to allow her to understand them in their natural form of communication, as they lack the type of mouth that allows them to speak as a human does. Since the hornets communicated just as natural hornets do, she can understand them via pheromones, flight patterns, as well as behaviors and the seasons. Her summon is not restricted to one species, but all hornets. Now, when I made this, I wasn't expecting anyone else to choose to control hornets(what a coincidence), so I made the summon a blanket summon (much like most summons) So yes, she can summon your hornets.

Insect biology aside, and for the sake of everyone involved's sanity, let's just say you can't simply render his hornets useless via pheromones. It's not an option. They seem unstable as hell anyway.

Not saying they'd be useless. I'm saying that he'd have to really have a strong control or strong relationship to overcome it. I'm not going to compromise my character when I'm giving him plenty of time to think of a work around. I made my character, it was accepted as she was. He wants to use these, he needs to figure it out. That is going to be a GLARING plot hole and make me seem like an idiot. No thank you.

AeronFarron said have a strong control or strong relationship to overcome it.

Well, there you have it, just overcome it with your bugs and its all good. Beatable.

Also, because everybody else is doing it, Tsukiko really has no sexual preference, having lived in a forest during the past year while she would have been forming such a preference, so I guess she's bi-curious?