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Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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Will do then ^^

A CS will be up later today then, most likely in an hour or two
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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I should be online by then :) I look forward to it ^^
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Antediluvixen
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Ugh

So much philosophy in that post

Someone give me a data sheet quick.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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Took me a bit longer than I expected but here! Its done :D

Edit: Should've added that even if the Staff and such know her actual name, she will introduce herself as Mana to anyone else ^^^
__________________________________

Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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Mr Nim said
Took me a bit longer than I expected but here! Its done :D__________________________________


Alright... it looks good, but there are a few things that concern me. First is her Shifter appearance. I feel like a lightning-covered humanoid figure is a bit off considering what the Thunderbird is portrayed to actually look like. My suggestion would be this: A humanoid body, a pair of wing-like arms, or perhaps just a pair of wings on her back? Hawk-like eyes and with a few other bird-like characteristics--and sparks of lightning occasionally dancing across her body. There are legends of the Thunderbird taking human shape, so I think something like this would be possible. You'd also be allowed to fly if you really want to. She is a bird-like Shifter after all. Perhaps claw-like hands as well? Just an idea, but I request a change in appearance as it doesn't quite fit with the legends and myths. I imagine something like this if her wings are still on her arms. Or perhaps something like this if her wings are on her back.

Another thing that I took note of—and something I never thought I'd actually say—is that she's actually underpowered. Compared to the rest of us and what I see as the standard for Worlds Collide, Melina is actually too weak. Considering how she's focused on commanding some of Nature's forces, I'd say she'd belong to the Fae class (please add that after "Shifter Form - Thunderbird"). She'd have incredible amount of power; being able to call down lightning and zap people with thunderbolts from afar.

She'd a high-power, medium-mobility type of Shifter. So while her abilities will eventually drain her, she's capable of much more than what you write. Also, since she's the "sorcerer" she's able to control the lightning. She can sort of "point" at a place, and lightning will strike there, or she can fire it from her own body. The choice is hers. So no "exhausted" after sending out a thunderbolt or two, and definitely not exit her Shifter form. You could easily give her some more power, and if it gets too much I'll just give you a poke :)

Now... there is one thing that really bugs me, and that is actually a part of her powers: While a person may become a bit faster, stronger, or tougher after becoming a Shifter, they do not become cleverer. She'll be just as intelligent after as she was as before. Becoming a Shifter affects your body and allows you to come in contact with your dormant magic, but not your mind.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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*Beep*ing doubleposts!
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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I wrote the Intellegence part because in the several places I have checked about the Thunderbird, it was always described as an intellegent being, but if thats a problem I have no problem changing it.

As for her being underpowered, you could say that because it is lightning I didn't really want to risk things, as any other abilities I could think of would start to connect to the Thunderbirds ability to manipulate the weather. And I didn't intend on making it seem like a single lightning or two will make her exauhsted, I meant that if she puts a lot of focus into it and makes it into a single lightning bolt that would chain between many different people (Who those people would still be uncontrollable except for the first one, after all, lightning), but I suppose I can go and change her powers descriptions.

Her shifter appearance... I didn't quite want to have her start growing wings which is why I put focus on the lightning. And if someone were to look at her while she hovering down then they would see her as a Lightning bird of sorts, but I guess I understand what you mean. Will work on the changes immediatly.

Edit: I have made changes, both to her powers and to her shifter appearance. Hope its 100% acceptable now :D
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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but it also becomes a bit more blurry, by which I mean that her body becomes a bit less physical in order to allow her to try and use the full potential of her powers.

This. Please delete this and make her body 100% physical. She's a Fae, not a Spirit so her body should be 100% physical.

Her body also becomes a bit less physical, and while it is not impossible to hit her with physical attacks, doing so might make the opponent who attacked her suddenly feel static or become a bit paralyzed for a bit, due to the lightning going around her body.
Same wit this body. While she could (potentially) surround herself in a small dome of static electricity, she is still 100% there and if someone hits her she will be hit.

This ability also leaves her feeling rather exausted and she will need to recover for a while. There is a large chance that after using this she will go out of her Shifter form
And another bit I'd like deleted :) While her most powerful attacks will drain her a bit, it won't exhaust her nor force her to exit her Shifter form (in fact, you can only exit the Shifter form by doing it yourself--willingly.

Last thing: I'd like a reason for why she doesn't like flying. I believe that most people would jump at the chance to fly under their own power, so why doesn't she like it?
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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Alright. Removed the first bit, changed the second one to only have a possibility of feeling a bit of static if someone hits her physically, and removed the last bit.

As for the reason, I've added it in the same part where it states she doesn't like it, as well as a small addition to her personality.

Besides, not everyone has to like the same thing. Just because most people would jump at the chance of flying with their own power doesn't mean everyone would do so. Some would prefet having solid ground beneath their feet. :P
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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Mr Nim said
Alright. Removed the first bit, changed the second one to only have a possibility of feeling a bit of static if someone hits her physically, and removed the last bit.As for the reason, I've added it in the same part where it states she doesn't like it, as well as a small addition to her personality.Besides, not everyone has to like the same thing. Just because most people would jump at the chance of flying with their own power doesn't mean everyone would do so. Some would prefet having solid ground beneath their feet. :P


That's true, but there should still be a reason for not liking to fly.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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Well, I've added a reason. Its related to her fear of unstable places :P

In an odd way.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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Mr Nim said
Well, I've added a reason. Its related to her fear of unstable places :PIn an odd way.


I suppose it makes sense. She's added to the Player List :)
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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Yippe :D

Now how to join the Siesta... I mean, I read that everyone just left the Cafeteria, so I should probably write something in that area. Hmm...

Edit: Might need a suggestion, because I've come to dislike bumping into other characters and walking by or such makes me keep thinking that Mana wouldn't just approach people who nearly went at it...

Unless.... I might come up with something in a few hours. Hopefully. If not then during tomorrow.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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A possibility would be to just have her do something. You could open up the possibility of other characters bumping into her?
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Lazo
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Mono and I are working on a small collab to bring in Celica. You could respond to that. Or join the collab.

Edit: There's a post. Celica and Alice are waiting in one of the 'train stations'. Mana could show up if she wants to, though for the most part there's only conversation going on for now, and one that might not be too interesting for her at that. Though I suppose magic in modern weapons could be a 'technology' she might find intriguing.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Mr Nim
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I decided to have Mana go "Spy mode" and fail.

Lets see if anyone will notice this.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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There's a bit of school work going on, so it'll be a little while before I get a post up here. Hopefully around the weekend at the latest.
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Don't worry. Compared to the waiting times in some other RPs I've taken a part in, a weekend post is almost too soon. Anyway, we're trying to get a post up with Mono and Nim. Should be ready to post either later today or tomorrow, I'd think, and then you can move the scene to wherever it needs to be.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Antediluvixen
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Hey guys I posted a thing.
Get hype.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
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I'll probably add something tomorrah, if I can think of anything to do that is.

Now that we have a group again I feel much more settled in.
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