---

"Great job on your mission, team. As much as I'm sure you all would love to get back to work, we will take over from here. We will instruct you for you next assignment as the need arrives. Dismissed."

---

"Well, wasn't that a climatic end to our heroic journey? Chief's safe and we made it back just in time for Taco Tuesday while the threat still looms outside our window. I swear, if they were any more pig headed, they'd win first prize at the fair."

"Calm down Buck; besides, I believe you offered the first round of drinks."

"Ha, I don't suppose you'd accept a rain check would you? I doubt their are any good bars in this neighborhood, and I'd rather not-"

"Alright, alright. Look, I'm sure Locke would appreciate it if we were ready by the time he needed us to move. Gear up, then we can spend our time on Buck's dime."

"Heh, whatever you say. But I get to choose the place."

Osiris split to go to their separate quarters, leaving Buck to his own devices. He knew they would be called back to it before long. He quickly gathered his gear and readied his weapons before noticing a small floating cloud making its way towards him. He lowered his hand to his sidearm, but knew this shouldn't be any real threat. Quickly the cloud approached, stopping a few feet in front of Buck. Lakitu promptly popped out from the cloud, handing out his letter. "You wouldn't be related to Vergil, would you?" Buck took the letter and watched as the lakitu flew off as quickly as it left. He stared at the paper in his hands, opening it despite his gut telling him not to.

"Yes or no, huh? Seems to me like a job for Cheif, but I suppose he has his own job to do." Not really too keen on letting the dust settle on his boots, Buck gathered his gear and donned his helmet before circling his answer on the paper. He was a soldier, it was is job to fight. Though, he didn't bother gathering the others in case they were happened to be called away to assist Locke. The letter did its magic and Buck ready-as-always stepped forward, teleported to a different world.

The trip was pretty casual; technically different from anything he was used to, but a moment upon arrival to catch his breath and he was ready to move out. He took in the pretty castle scenery. It was all sturdy and clean; nothing like the war zone he expected to be dropped off into like he would have back in his own world. 'Own world.' That thought threw him for a loop. He quickly ran though the fact that there could be countless others to arrive with, before, and after him; all from different universes and looking nothing alike. Bad guys could prove to be a bit harder to pinpoint here, but he assumed he was probably safe for now.

Looking up, he noticed the orange creature coming to meet him. Buck honestly had no clue what the creature was saying, but figured it for an assistant for whoever sent the letter. Buck followed, keeping his hands on his weapon, and walked to the elevator only to have the little guy disappear on him. Buck copied him and found him once more in another place, though this time with little men running every witch away. One more squawk from Qbert and Buck just nodded. Obviously he was here to wait, though it didn't seem like he was the only one.

Buck ignored the food, other than noting its existence and focused on the group of people ahead. They seemed quite friendly, but didn't look like they normally belonged together. Those guys were probably his new fireteam. He just hoped they could hold their own. He didn't really recognize anyone there, until a certain plumber decided to throw a potato ball. Stashing away his weapons and reattaching his helmet, fearing what would happen next. It seems formal greetings might have to wait.

With every minute passed in close proximity with the little being who introduced her/himself as Quina, the more it stirred a feeling of endearment within Ezio. Quina was seemingly absent-minded, and contend to fill the silence on his part with ramblings. Ezio didn't feel like interrupting, even as s/he pointed to the chef's hat upon his/her head in answer to his question. Did s/he perhaps identified her/himself as a cook? Ezio cocked an eyebrow in question, realising a split second later that that action was futile in conveying his puzzlement. Before he could open his mouth to as, however, Quina was out of the seat and moving again, gathering armfuls of food from the untouched feast cooling upon the table top. Faintly, he hoped that s/he was not planning on devouring them all. He didn't wish to excuse himself and potentially hurt QUina's feelings when the little being had been nothing but friendly.

Fortunately for Ezio, Quina had other things in mind for the load of food. Removing his arms from the table and leaning back slightly from the mess, the Assassin watched in amusement as a rough image began to form in the middle of it all. It didn't take long before Quina was done and Ezio was left peering at the rough construct which was slowly sinking as moisture soaked into the bread foundation of the buildings - or at least, what looked to be buildings. Lifting a hand to draw the bowl closer, taking care not to jostle it too much, Ezio glanced up at Quina's beaming face. Ezio flashed him/her a grin, poking at the standing dumpling and causing it to flop face-first into the soup alongside its brethren.

"The swamp, huh? I wouldn't have guessed considering the paleness of your skin." Ezio waved a hand to indicate the entity of Quina from head to toe. "But I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, given that you don't seem to mind the sodden state of your clothes."

"You might have liked Roma during the winter. Sure, during the worse days, it freezes you to the bones but the rain, mio dio, when it pours, the fields beyond the city walls could be mistaken for a swamp." He paused, then let out a soft chuckle to dismiss his words. "I've always wondered what other kinds of worlds existed beside the one I am familiar with and what each might contain. It seems like I just might get the chance to sate that curiosity. If at all possible, when all this is over, I might like to see your homeland, Quina."

Ezio would probably have said more, or moved the bowl now containing a pitiful heap of mush made from various food out of reach when half his attention turned to the entrance once more. The first to enter was another Legend, followed by a man in armour that looked more complex and menacing then the Brutes' could ever be. Advanced technology? He vaguely remebered seeing a glimpse of something similar when he first held the Apple of Eden. Reflexively, his fingers clinched tighter around the bowl as Mario lobbed a potato towards Samus. Glancing at Quina from the corner of his eyes, Ezio edged the bowl away from him/her. From when little he knew about the little creature, s/he might imitate Mario and try dumping the mush on him. If Ezio truly was going to be drawn into a food fight - of all things, seriously? - he wasn't about to let his outfit be ruined by slop. Dry foods wouldn't ruin his robes, but soup and other stainable liquids was another matter altogether.

Quina opened his/her mouth as if to say something, or possibly just to eat something, as that first fateful potato ball was thrown. With surprising speed, Quina had managed to grasp what was about to unfold, namely, that the line between food and not-food was about to get rather messily blurred, and in a way that'd hopefully be tidied up by somebody else. Quina wanted to thank the hooded man named Ezio for the kind words about her (or his?) pale skin, that Quina had no idea why his (or her) clothes were so wet and that a trip to Roma would be wonderful after a trip the swamp.

Sadly, it mostly came out as, "Thank you! Fishing... maybe? Roma good. Wet. Also, not move! Yes?"

From Ezio's and Quina's position at the table at the furthest end of the hall, it only made sense that to Quina that they should fight alongside one another. To that end, Quina took up arms, taking one of the ladles used previously to mix up the sad looking swamp soup and loading it up with one of the sodden bread rolls that had once been a hill playing host to a happy family of peas pretending to be frogs. As something of an afterthought, Quina rescued one of the drowning dumpling people, and then crammed that into his (or her) mouth.

Now with the matter of eating taken care of, Quina attacked. It wasn't particularly accurate at such a long range, but with the extra reach provided by the ladle, this soggy lump of bread could at least travel an impressive distance compared to a hand-thrown roll. Quina didn't even bother to check whether or not it was anywhere near on target as it spiralled towards the armoured figure of Edward Buck, because Quina was seemingly quite determined to make sure Ezio was between her (or him?) and the rest of the combatants. That's what friends were for, right? To be used as human shields in case of a food fight?

"Friends, yes? Ezio. Quina. Friends," said the Qu, sounding quite urgent indeed as he (or she?) tried to position herself (or himself?) behind Ezio, "Quina is... just trying to get past new friend. Teamwork!"

Quina's interpretation of "team work" in this instance seemed to involve a lot of somebody else getting hit by food and being left to safely fire, and occasionally eat, food based projectiles.

Gordon raised an eyebrow in surprise at the wolf speaking the shared language of silent protagonists, and was even more surprised to see its tail wagging. It went on to introduce itself as 'Amaterasu, God of the Sun', and apparently it was a she. Gordon wasn't that all surprised that she was a self-proclaimed god, because he had fought many god-like entities before, such as the overlord of Xen, Nihilanth, the multiversal Combine, and... him. Even Gordon couldn't fully comprehend what he, or it really was. The G-Man was an illusive entity that warped the laws of reality to fit his needs. He had offered Freeman a 'job' under his 'employers'. As far as he could tell, the G-Man was now his boss.

"..." Gordon nodded in appreciation, introducing himself and asking about the Mugen Virus at the same time. The two of them continued their silent conversation much to the confusion of everyone else when the door of the elevator opened again. Out walked a man in incredibly advanced armour that somewhat resembled that of an Overwatch Elite's, and...

Gordon's other eyebrow rose in surprise.

That was Mario. The legend of all legends. The Vortigaunts were much more vocal about him. They spoke very highly of 'The One Above All'.

Weakly raising an arm in a slow wave, he was met with the sight of the plumber grabbing a leg of turkey, then proceeding to choke on it. Freeman's expression changed into one of moderate concern. It would be pretty devastating to lose one of the most famous legends of all time. However, he was met with relief when Mario managed to get the food down after some struggles. Gordon shrugged and was about to return to his conversation with the wolf god when the plumber shouted Samus' name, before tossing a potato ball at her.

Time seemed to stop for Gordon as his thought processes kicked in. According to the angle the potato was thrown and its current velocity and relative size and shape, then the starchy projectile was aimed directly at the exposed head of the intergalactic bounty hunter. If his calculations were correct, then the time to impact was approximately 1.001212 seconds. Not enough time to draw his Gravity Gun to intercept the baked explosive, and he wasn't sure if Samus would be able to react in time, considering she was facing away from Mario and currently talking to the gothic man, the 'Hunter'. Whatever was going to happen, Gordon feared for his life.

As time sped back up, he looked away as the potato bomb resumed its course. He drew his Gravity Gun just in case things got real, and opted to simply hide behind a table some distance away and wait for the whole thing to blow over.

Ezio was honestly very pleased that Quina didn't decide to get him first. With a suppressed grin, he watched him/her lobbed a ladle full of mush towards the newcomer in cool armour. Two heartbeats later he was up from his seat and standing clear of the table. Good thing he chose the furthest one, aye? He didn't follow the utensil's path to its destination, instead busying himself with hefting the now three-quarter full bowl in his right hand. A food fight as mock combat - probably to discern each individual's abilities, strengths, and weaknesses. Right, this he can do. Beats sitting around anytime. Scanning the room quickly, he noted that Freeman had opted to take cover and the others had yet to react. Drawing his right arm back as though he was preparing to lob a cannonball, Ezio bunched his muscles and threw the bowl forward, aiming towards the male with the tricorn hat. With any luck, it would splatter on the man's torso as well as any in close proximity.

With a low chuckle, he dropped low into a crouch, glancing back at Quina as s/he tried to hide behind him. "Well, seeing as you did not try to douse me in food, friends we are." He craned his head upwards, surveying the ceiling, the pillars and rafters provided. It was woefully inadequate compared the castles and buildings of his homeland, but he could spot a path that will get him high enough, and sufficient space to dodge without much fuss. "However, I am sorry to say I will be seeking higher grounds. Of course, friends mean I will provide cover for you as best I can, but I suggest you stay low. Use your height - or lack thereof - to your advantage, bene?"

With a final pat on Quina's shoulder, Ezio grabbed a handful of small dinner rolls - good projectiles if one didn't mind their victims receiving a bruise instead of a gooey mess - and stuffed it into his empty medicine pouch. Still in a crouch, he padded silently over to the nearest pillar, eyes re-identifying the quickest route to his destination. It would be difficult due to lack of close handholds, hence his need to double check things. The corners of his lips turned down in disgruntlement. If all the buildings in this dimension were as smooth and sparsely decorated as proved in this reception hall, whether it be the interior or exterior, it would put a damper on one of Ezio's finer skills. Ah well, he'll make do.

Surging up to his feet, Ezio took a step forward, setting his right foot on the bench before pushing his entire body upwards. His hands rose up above his head, finger catching the thin ledge of the pillar. As soon as he got a firm hold, he heaved upwards again, left hand reaching up for the next handhold. Halfway up the pillar and before he prepared to make a 180 degrees jump for the lowerest rafter, Ezio scanned the place again, just in case anyone had taken notice of his actions, and whether or not he needed to dodge. Hopefully no one would be aiming for him when he made the jump.

Ammy saw the reaction of her conversation partner and followed his eyes across the room to find someone that didn't surprise her in the least. If the Mugen situation was as dire as the letter made it out to be then it was only natural that the living legend himself, the veritable father of them all, would be in attendance. His appearance was rather shocking, though. She had expected someone much shorter. His boisterous actions, though, were definitely what she had come to expect from legendary heroes. Ones at rest, anyway.

The moment the potato left Mario's hand time slowed down for her in much the same way it had for Freeman except while his were the analytical calculations of the forebrain hers were the instinctual reactions of the hindbrain, which was now screaming Ball Ball Ball In The Air Flying Through The Air Get It Get It Get It GET IT!!! So while Freeman drew some strange weapon and shrank away behind a table Ammy charged forward. She clambered up onto the table and plowed across it, scattering the food in front of her toward the man in black (@SuddenSardines) and his unlucky conversation partner (@Lmpkio), before taking a flying leap over the man in blacks head. She shoved herself forward in the air, a flurry of autumn leaves erupting around her as she blew past Samus, and opened up her mouth to intercept the flying potato with a sharp snap of the jaw.

---

"Oh-ho no you don't."Buck activated his thrusters, anticipating a bigger first attack, but the war had indeed started. He jettisoned away out of the bread's path and noticed the pair on far side as well as Freeman's attempt for defense. At the end of his evasion, Buck reach out and grabbed a pitcher of lemonade with one hand and a slice of cake with the other. Lobbing the cake as far as he could at strange creature he originally thought as part of the service staff, Quina, while he splashed up the lemonade half-heartedly between him the Italian circus guy, Ezio, fearing his actions were a second attack from the obvious team. Buck dropped the pitcher and made a break for it, running toward the guy ballsy enough to pull out a weapon. He just hoped it wasn't anything dangerous, but the guy looked experienced enough not to do anything that crazy. Buck grabbed a few tables and overturned them before forging together a small triangular fort along side Freeman's hiding spot and jumping in.

“Nice piece of tech there. Gunnery Sergeant Buck, pleasure. I don't suppose you know any good recipes of war?" He wasn't really sure who was the bigger threat was, but preferred to stay clean while the kids had their fun. He glanced out of cover as he grabbed a dish of deviled eggs and a couple of pies, taking in the development of the fight as well as keeping an eye on the acrobat. Taking the opportunity, Buck set down the eggs and launched the two cream pies over the heads of Mario and the rest of the gang. He followed suit with his knife, throwing and hitting pies above the group’s head causing them to split and splatter down a rain of lemon meringue and broken pie crusts. His knife traveled through, sticking into the wall. He’d have to retrieve it once it was over.

---

The Hunter glanced over at the strangely armored woman who came forward. The whispers once again returned, speaking the words "Samus Aran", "Chozo", and "Metroids". Shaking them from his head again, the Hunter lightly smiled at her comment. "No. Those are Vilebloods, and no one likes them. Besides, most of the blood I get covered in is hardly human." The Hunter glanced back over at the odd wolf-woman. She was apparently "speaking" with the Free Man now. Though how they apparently communicated through silence was beyond him. Still, he was able to pick up traces of meaning through the whispers. Apparently the wolf-woman's name was "Amaterasu". Turning back to Samus, he added, "Interesting choice of weaponry, by the way. The few hunters I know who use arm canons are known for their love of explosions."

The Hunter's attention was suddenly seized by the onset of whispers from a man in red at a nearby table. Through the sudden haze, the Hunter could only catch one word: "Mario". Curious. He was about to ask something, when this Mario character suddenly hurled food at Samus. The Hunter motioned for her to move, when suddenly Amaterasu lunged up onto the table to intercept. Glancing to his left, the man in the white robe suddenly hurled a bowl of soup at him. As all of the food splashing began to converge on the Hunter, he channeled his natural energies throughout his body. While in no position to naturally dodge, he did have a trick up his sleeve. Tapping into his art of Quickening, the Hunter kicked himself back off of the table and out of the path of food, moving faster than normal sight could track. Of course, kicking off the table meant that anyone on the other side was getting covered in food.

Sliding down one of the rows for a few feet on his back, the Hunter flipped himself back onto his feet. He was very annoyed. He had just been forced to use a Quickening burst over a food fight. Normally, the Hunter wasn't one to engage in such petty debacles, but he was furious. Noticing the man in the white robe climbing up the rafters, the Hunter grabbed a nearby set of sausage links. He gave it some momentum by spinning it around, before hurling it at the man as he jumped across the rafters.

Having gotten that shot off, the Hunter moved to get some distance between him and the others. If things continued like this, the fight would mostly be held at range. Any extra distance would give him more time to dodge. He moved to a row where he would have ample room to avoid any further attacks, and waited for this all to blow over.

"No. Those are Vilebloods, and no one likes them. Besides, most of the blood I get covered in is hardly human." the Gothic man replies with a friendly smile.

So he isn't a vampire after all. At least he mentions an interesting term for them... "Vilebloods". That sounds rather intriguing. And the fact that the blood covering the man is in fact NOT human, makes him slightly more relatable. Again, Samus' eyebrow perks up in curiosity as she makes an audible "hmm", as if she's contemplating something, as the man interacts with the wolf creature.

"I see.", she responds while observing him, turning only briefly to notice a new hero, some other sci-fi space soldier come into the castle, "So you kill monsters for a living, huh? So do I... but the creatures I face are perhaps far more dangerous, and must I mention more highly-technologically advanced than what you battle? You'll need more than simple swords n' shields to take em' down, you know?"

After a slight pause, the man turns from the wolf and back in the bounty hunter's sight.

"Interesting choice of weaponry, by the way. The few hunters I know who use arm canons are known for their love of explosions."

Samus glances down at her arm cannon, sleek in design with smooth edges. Not a single sharp edge can be seen, as it's mostly comprised of cylinders and half-spheres. She lifts her arm cannon towards her breast, giving the Hunter a better view of the weapon.

"Oh believe me, it's much more versatile than you think." Samus responds with a smirk, turning the weapon to the left and right as to get a closer look with her arm, "It doesn't only fire plasma pellets, beams and missiles. It can also uplink with computers, change said beam types, hell I can even use it to control my gunship. It's really~"

But before she can finish explaining the full capabilities of her arm cannon, she hears a familiar voice call her name and then some.

“Hey, Samus!” the familiar voice calls.

She pauses her conversation coldly as she looks slightly back with her eyes, sighing annoyingly. She knew instantly who it belonged to. It belonged to a certain plumber, a rather hefty one mind you, wearing your traditional red shirt and blue overalls, as well as a hat with the letter M and a mustache most men fear and the women swoon head-over-heels. Well... most of them anyways. And that wasn't the only thing she sensed in those few quick seconds. Her enhanced senses, thanks to being modified by the chozo, instantly alerting her to an incoming projectile. She knows not of what was fired or thrown at her, but she knows it's coming straight in for a headshot.

In one blindingly fast turn, wasting absolutely no time, she twists a full 180° turn as she raises her arm cannon up. From the mouth of the barrel, Samus prepares to fire a beam that will completely disintegrate the entire projectile right from the sky, engulfing it in a giant streak of blue plasma!

Oh but if only it were true...

Before she could fire anything from her arm cannon, suddenly the wolf creature who was communicating with the Hunter jumped into view and snatched the potato ball before it can get a chance to hit or be hit by Samus' cannon. The bounty hunter was taken a bit off guard, but fires a plasma pellet in slight confusion, almost hitting the wolf! She totally didn't mean to almost shoot Amaterasu. Her head turns towards the plumber, with fire in her eyes...

Samus Aran is not amused at this mockery...

---

---

Her stone-cold gaze glares at where Mario stands for a hot second before snatching something from one of the castle members' hands. It's a long submarine sandwich, filled with an assortment of meats, vegetables, and condiments. She loads it into her arm cannon and aims it right where Mario is. Even if he tries to escape, Samus is known for being a highly-skilled with her aim. Then, like a submarine locking onto a ship, Samus fires a homing missile that'll rocket towards the plumber. Once it gets close to him, the missile will explode and the sandwich's ornaments will splatter across his face, causing an even bigger mess compared to what Mario tried to do. That is, if nothing stands in its way.

Mario @Holy Soldier (and to a lesser extent, everyone else. He just isn't focusing on you guys yet).

In a small, tidy office that had been recently cleaned Luigi sat alone at his desk as he read through the bane of all business enterprises; Paperwork. Every expense and payment needed to be written down, every job that he had taken needed to be carefully recorded and filed... After all, just because he had saved the Kingdom alongside his brother several times didn't mean that they were immune to taxation. Sure, Princess Peach could likely grant both himself and Mario such a thing and they were both well known and popular enough that they might just get away with it, but there was always that chance that the rest of the population might get... annoyed by such a state of affairs. Better to avoid that ill will.

Just as he dotted the last 'i' on the bottom line of the order form for a special kind of pipe, a knock on the window drew Luigi's attention. Floating there was a Lakitu, looking at him with a breathlessness that suggested that he had rushed here in a hurry while holding up an envelop and waving it to get his attention. Opening a draw of his desk, Luigi grabbed a coin before getting up and walking over to the window to open it. As Lakitu gave him the letter, Luigi smiled as he offered him the coin in return. "Thank you. A tip for your troubles." He explained kindly before closing the window and walking back over to his desk to break the seal and read the letter.

The contents of the letter made him sigh. He couldn't just pull a Mario and run off at the first sign of adventure in the knowledge that he had someone to look after their business while he was gone. He was still going to go of course, but as he placed the letter down on his desk, Luigi resolved himself to making a few phone calls and sending a few letters to avoid pissing off his clients too much; Rearranging things with them was better then not showing up at all after all.

Once the last call had been made, only then did Luigi take a pen and circle Yes on the letter... before a portal formed underneath him and dropped him down to another adventure.

.............................................................

As his feet touched the ground, Luigi blinked a little as he looked around. He was in a castle. This wasn't the first time he had been in such a place, through the proper lighting and the lack of death traps made it one of the better ones by default. While he started off alone, his attention was quickly drawn to the orange... thing that was walking towards him. While it didn't speak in a language that he could understand, it was clear that it wanted him to follow it.

Arriving at an elevator, Luigi took a deep breath while they were going down... before the door opened and reveled a room that was laid out for one of the greatest feasts he had ever seen!... Which was currently in the middle of a food fight.

And standing in the middle of it all was Mario. After all this time and worry, Mario was not only alive and well (and looking great it had to be said) but he was currently enjoying himself in a food fight without ever bothering to tell anyone where he was, what he was doing or why he was going. His hands clenching into fists as all the worry that he had for his brother was replaced by anger, Luigi walked over to one of the tables closest to the entrance of the room in order to grab a turkey leg the size of his forearm... before winding up and lobbing it at the back of his brother's head!

The moment blue-armoured guy (Edward Buck) tossed a pitcher of pale beverage in Ezio's direction, the Assassin was already jumping for the rafters. However, such urgency was perhaps unnecessary, for the toss was a half-hearted one, probably meant as a distraction for an opportunity to set up defenses. Clicking his teeth in mild annoyance as the wide chairs blocked his vision of Buck and Freeman - for now - Ezio hand-shuffled along the relatively low beam. This one could support his weight, but it will restrict both his field of vision and range of movement. Swinging to the opposite side of the beam, he throw another side-along look over the room and down at Quina. His new friend has yet to move from behind their table, but that was all right. As long as s/he kept her head down and took pot shots, s/he would do just fine. Being shorter than everyone else would draw less attention too, if s/he was lucky.

His gaze went over to where his initial target (The Hunter) was, only to find him gone in a blink of an eye. No, not gone, merely...relocated, with not one speck of mush on his black attire. Ah well, hitting the guy would have been nice, but in exchange, Ezio at least knew what one of The Hunter's skills were. Moving at a speed untrackable with the human eye, even one as sharp as his own. If Ezio had such an ability, escaping the Templars would be much easier. Despite the mock battle, a part of his brain was unrepentantly gleeful at having the chance to see other powers and skills in action, even if they were currently used against his favour, it certainly made things interesting. Flipping to the opposite side of the beam in order to get to the next one up, he coiled his body in preparation and leaped. Something twacked against his right boot as he pulled himself up onto the wide beam.

"Merde!" Ezio cursed under his breath, crouching on the sturdy wood and peered down below to see what it was that hit him. A link of sausages laid on the pale tiles below. Eyes narrowed, he quickly determined which direction it came from based on the location it hit him in the foot. The culprit was the Hunter, who was distancing himself from the rest.

"This means war, figilo di puttana!" Ezio's crass words lost its menace as a grin broke his serious demeanor.

He grabbed a dinner roll from his pouch, moving as far down the beam as he could in order to get a clear look at Freeman and Buck huddling behind their fortifications. Once again, humans - or land-dwellers generally - and their refusal to look upwards. Squishing the halves into a hard, dense ball, he lobbed one each at the two men, aiming for the heads. Next, he broke another roll and did the same to each half. This time, however, he aimed only one at the Hunter's left shoulder. Ezio had only brought a grand total of six rolls with him. Wasting ammunition would be most unwise, and going down to collect some would be a waste of time. No, best conserve ammo, remain up here in the rafters and take pot-shots.

From his, or her, sort of hiding place behind the vacant chair Ezio had left behind, Quina took a moment to watch the fight unfold - people were breaking out all manner of weird weapons and strange abilities to fight. The newest entrant and the It was turning into quite the spectacle and, feeling perhaps a little more confident that he (or she?) wouldn't be much of a target, Quina edged around the chair, trying to gather up more food from the nearby table top. After all, it couldn't hurt to get a few more projectiles at the ready, and maybe an extra snack. With eyes firmly fixed now on a particularly tasty looking platter in the middle of the table, just out of arm's reach, Quina began to clamber up on to the tabl-

"I'm hit!?"

Half way through the process of clambering up on to the table, Quina noticed the slice of cake thrown by Edward Buck was stuck to the right hand side of her (or his?) overcoat. Quina let out a little giggle and was barely able to contain the smile spreading over his (or, well, her) face as the Qu dramatically span around on the spot, one arm covering her (or his) face, before collapsing to the floor. Okay, collapsing might be a bit of a stretch, it was more like sitting down on the stone floor of the hall.

"I merely! Sought... lasting peace! Between two kingdoms!"

Acting was not clearly not Quina's strong suit, but Quina gave it his/her best, quoting some line from some half-remembered play or other as the Qu clutched the cake to her/his side. Freshly whipped cream and strawberry jam leaked between the fingers of Quina's gloves and, with hands trembling, Quina brought the cake-covered hands up to in front of his (or her) eyes. With a just-about-suppressed giggle and an overly dramatic noise that was, presumably, supposed to sound like a death rattle, Quina finally flopped backwards.

"Am dead. Avenge me, Ezio Friend. Traitor is.." Quina paused for dramatic effect, as well as to lick some of the cake off his/her gloves, "...Silver Armour Man!" (@Aether Spawn) Quina let out another sort-of-death-rattle-but-maybe-it-was-just-the-sound-of-a-throat-being-cleared, just to make sure.

Now laying on the floor, half underneath the table, Quina finished eating up the slice of cake and stared blankly up at the underside of the table that now served as something of a shelter. At least for his, or her, upper half. As s/he ate, another thought began to press in on her/his mind - what if Ezio thought that Quina was really dead? Quina's acting was perfect, at least in Quina's own mind, no doubt an equal to any other actor Quina had ever encountered. Was the performance too believable? Quina had a responsibility to make sure that his, or her, magnificent acting skills did not cause any harm. There was a code or something, right?

"Friend Ezio! Not worry. Quina not really dead," came a quiet voice from underneath the table, "is just pretend. Acting!"

Gordon was taken by surprise at the sudden appearance of the armoured man. He spoke with a southern accent and introduced himself as Gunnery Sergeant Buck. He asked Gordon if he knew any good recipes of war, to which he shook his head. Gordon didn't know how to cook; he ruined everything he made. He even blew up a microwave casserole back at Black Mesa. Buck began setting up defences and made the area the pair was hiding behind into a makeshift fort. Then, he sprang into action, picking up several pies and deviled eggs and sending them hurtling towards Mario and everyone else. He followed this by tossing a knife at the pies, causing them to split open and rain some lemon filling.

Freeman took a moment to pop his head out of cover, and saw a rather large ball of bread hurtling right towards him. Reflexes kicking in, he caught the yeasty projectile right before it hit with his Gravity Gun, then returned it to its sender by using the primary fire of his repurposed heavy lifting tool.

Okay, now it was on. Gordon wanted to simply remain neutral, but refused to stand idly at an act of war. And that was one such act that was unforgivable.

Standing up, he levitated a tray of fruit tarts towards him, then punted it with his equipped weapon. The tray flew into the air, making it rain the deadly deliciousness onto everyone in the immediate area. He followed by activating his Long Jump Module to jump to the emptier far side of the room. Landing on his feet, he spun around and punted several cakes at Mario in rapid succession, before ducking back into cover.

In a time like this, Gordon needed allies. He considered Buck one, since he jumped into cover with him and took the time to introduce himself, before going on the offensive. Samus was a good choice as well. She was more or less the first person he interacted with, and Mario had attacked her, making him the prime target as he was the one who started this whole thing. The weird eaty thing had apparently been hit by a slice of Buck's cake and he/she/attack helicopter was on the floor, pretending to be bleeding out. That probably meant he/she/Chinese was out of the fight. Gordon felt his palm meet his face. Why was he thinking like he was on the battlefields of the Uprising when this was just a food fight?

Mario had been grinning wickedly while he watched his starchy projectile fly toward his future wife Smash rival @Lmpkio. His expression dramatically changed when a white canine [@Gentlemanvaultyboy] leapt in front of Samus to intercept the potato. His dark brows shot upwards and his jaw dropped in a silent What the fuck?

“Where did that dog come from?” Mario growled. He would have called Samus a cheater but he wasn’t sure if the dog was hers or not.

The plumber tensed when the bounty hunter cast a vicious glare in his direction. He held his hands up pathetically in surrender, his grin turning sheepish.

“Come on, lighten up, eh?” he tried to reason, and watching the woman resort to loading her arm cannon with a submarine sandwich, he knew there wasn’t going to be any light-hearted laughter.

Several things happened in that second, cream started raining from overheard. Mario raised his arm to shield his face from the rain before turning in an attempt to run from Samus’s homing shot. Instead, he turned right into a giant drumstick—karma was a bitch! The leg struck him in the face, causing his eyes to lock closed and face to scrunch in pain.

“Agh, shit!” Mario exclaimed. His arms caught the hot leg before it could hit the floor, and he managed to open one eye. The other eye had some salt and marinade on it. He immediately turned toward Samus’s homing sandwich missile with the bone gripped in both hands like a bat.

“Batter up!” he shouted, swinging the piece of meat in the same manner he would his power hammer at the missile. The sandwich exploded much like Samus had hoped, layering the plumber in a suit of bread, deli, cheese, tomato, lettuce, et al. Lowering the drumstick, Mario’s eyes narrowed into an unenthusiastic expression as he wiped sandwich from his face with a sandwich-covered hand. She was going to pay for that but before he could exact his revenge, he glanced over at Luigi.

Mario noticed his brother was angry and blushed. A nervous smile cracked on his face as he hid the drumstick behind his back.

“Mama mia, it’s Luigi! It’s been so long,” Mario pathetically greeted. “They invited you here?”

He sounded surprised, which wasn’t a good start for their sudden reunion. There wasn’t any time to spare as fruit tarts started raining from the sky. It was then that Mario realized that his one thrown potato had started a chain of chaos. Every hero in the room was equipping every nutritional weapon they could find to take with them into battle. Slapping a fruit aside with his turkey bat, Mario watched the flying scientist @Hostile leap with an impressive amount of air that could have rivaled the Power Jump. He landed and armed himself with cakes using his weird gun thing, and out of all the people in the room, he wanted to attack him. Really?

Mario whacked the first cake away with his turkey bat, and blocked the following cakes with his poultry weapon. Cake splattered everywhere adding to the sandwich meat that already covered his body. Out of frustration, Mario spoke once more to Luigi:

“All right; you’re mad at me. I get it, but I gotta battle to win right now!”

Mario stepped over to one of the banquet tables he had been standing next to and rested his hand beneath it. Baring his teeth, his muscular arm bulged beneath the blue sleeve of his shirt as he lifted the table. With a grunt of strength, Mario yelled, “Eat this!” and sent the table airborne with all of its goodies flying toward Freeman. The table’s shadow crossed the room like an aircraft, as food splattered the floor in its wake.

Amaterasu spun as gracefully as she could through the air, snapping up the flying potato and crushing it to a fine mush between her jaws. She hardly even had time to enjoy it before something small and hot streak over her head, singeing slightly the very tips of her ears and eliciting a yelp that caused most of the potato to fly from her mouth and land on the floor in front of her. She landed heavy in that mush, a small patch of grass and flowers spring up around her feet to soften her landing before quietly fading away, before spinning around to see what that had been. She found Samus Aran, large canon on her arm outstretched but already moving onto other things. As if she hadn't just committed attempted deicide. Ammy let out a low growl.

Time stopped. The world went grey as a divine canvas was layered over the top of it and Ammy felt herself pull back, out of the wolfish vessel she presented to the world. She felt her consciousness hovering a few feet behind her body, able to look about independently and observe the situation around her in a calm and collected fashion. She didn't do this, though. She was angry. She felt herself lift up her brush and stab it down repeatedly on the bounty hunters face until it was looked to her like nothing but a black hole stabbed through the canvas to reveled the dark universe beyond. With any luck when time resumed Aran's face would be covered in ink.

The world regained its coloring as Ammy moved back into her vessel and time resumed again, and it was now that Ammy paid the dear price for her previous inattentiveness. She was splattered first by lemon meringue (@Aether Spawn), before being lightly based in the crumbs and fillings of an assortment of fruit tarts (@Hostile). She looked up to see Gordon fly overhead before a whole table was sent flying across the room after him, scattering dishes which shattered to the floor around her and left her covered in all manner of sauces, soups, and small vegetables.

She took the time to stick out her tongue and lick some of the tomato soup/lemon/raspberry filling/peas/chicken fat combination that now covered her from around her chops and the tip of her nose, marveling at how surprisingly tasty it was, while she took stock of the room. The man in black (@SuddenSardines) was engaged in a duel with a man in white (@Loki Odinson) that had managed to climb his way into the rafters, so there was no real reason to worry about him right now. There was a new guy, clad in green (@Bright_Ops), that she really thought she felt like she should know from a glance, setting himself against Mario. Then she spotted the pale things (@Hylozoist) bottom half laying out from under a table and Ammy couldn't help but think it had the right idea.

Acting under the logic that she wasn't about to be get much dirtier than this no matter what was thrown at her she yawned loudly, paced in a circle a few times to spread a semi-debris free area to lie in, and curled up in the middle of the floor to take a quick nap. Soon she was snoring away in utter defeat.

When Freeman popped out of his cover and perfectly into the trajectory of his thrown projectile, Ezio waited in anticipation for the smack. Unfortunately, that was not to be when the man pulled his weapon - Ezio assumed it was a weapon given the way he wielded it. Just as he would do when faced with a bow and arrow, he tipped backward, breaking his fall by clinging onto the beam he previously crouched upon. The entire maneuver took less than a second and in that time, the bread splattered in a paste on the stone ceiling above.

"Woah, that's a close one." He muttered as he once again hauled himself up, just in time to hear Quina 'die' dramatically, sounds of over-the-top acting heard rather clearly over the noise of the food fight in the background. The place below was getting messy pretty quickly, and he was glad to be away from it all. Maybe not safely away, but as close as one could be.

"Requiescat in pace, mio amico." Ezio called out to Quina, voice not breaking the slightest as he threw himself forward, scrambling up the yet-again-higher beam to his right. "Worry not, for I shall avenge you or die trying!"

Mario, Luigi and Samus were engaged in their own battle and it would be disrespectful to interfere. The large wolf (Amaterasu) was currently curled up in the middle of the floor, apparently having given up on the battle to care. It was an easy target, but Ezio had never been one to take the easy way out, or target someone who wasn't targeting back. The only ones this didn't apply to were Templars, and since none of those atrocious people were here, he was going to stick to his rules. So that left the Hunter, who was still distancing himself from people and the armoured guy (Edward Buck) as potential targets. Freeman, he would leave as a secondary for now, since his weapon was apparently capable of sending projectiles back.

His new vantage point put him at the back of the room in contrast to the right-hand side he had started out in. Here, he could see Quina's entire body laying on the floor as well as the back of the one who 'killed' her/him (Edward Buck). Using this opportunity, he sent three bread balls in the direction of Buck, both aimed at the center of his back, spaced one second apart with the second ball aimed slightly to the right in case he dodged the first. Three dinner rolls down and three left, Ezio pulled another one apart to hurl them at Freeman after a moment's thought. This time, he aimed one at the man's lower abdomen and the other at his legs.

Gordon's eyes widened as Mario tossed a table at him, along with everything on it. The piece of furniture and weaponised food crossed the entire hall in an instant, casting a looming shadow as it sailed through the air, carpet bombing the area with the edibles. With a silent scream, Freeman rolled out of the way, narrowly dodging the table as it smashed into the wall behind him and shattered. Unfortunately, he wasn't spared from the hail of baked products, and his armoured legs were splattered with chocolate, cream, and jam. That was going to take some time to clean.

Rising out of cover and shaking his fist at Mario as if to say 'you maniac!', he picked up a massive five-layer cake with his Gravity Gun's manipulation field. Gritting his teeth, he launched it at the Italian plumber. The cake separated midair, the five layers flying in all different directions, its cream icing doing the same.

Jumping back to his original position behind several upturned tables, Gordon tapped Buck’s shoulder to get his attention. He pointed at Samus and the Hunter, shaking his head in order to say that they were friendly. He then pointed at Mario and nodded, marking him as a primary hostile target. He couldn't find his original attacker, though. Scanning them room, he ducked back into cover.

He spun around just in time to see several more bread rolls heading right for him. Acting on instinct, he punted one away and swatted the other with the muzzle of his Gravity Gun. His reflexes had been trained from constantly deflecting Combine grenades. Scanning the room, he spotted the white-robed assassin. Furrowing his brows, he retrieved a pizza and fired it at him, the disk-shaped delicacy gracefully flying towards him like a frisbee.

He rolled out of cover once more and picked up a trio of cream puffs, biting off a portion of the pastry, them lobbing them at the assassin like grenades. The large hole in the puff ensured that the creamy filling would explode out when they hit.

Watching as Mario turned into the drumstick that he had thrown, Luigi couldn't help but wince a little. Sure, he was angry at his older brother for disappearing without a trace or warning and he wanted to ensure that Mario was aware of the fact that he had gone to far with his antics, but he didn't actually want to do any real damage to him.

“Mama mia, it’s Luigi! It’s been so long. They invited you here?”

The concern that he had for his stricken twin brother vanished in an instant at the fact that Mario had been surprised to see him here; As if the very idea that he would have been invited to a gathering of the greatest heroes of all time was unthinkable. "You disappear without telling me where you are going... or even that you're going in the first place... and THIS is the first thing you havta say to me?!"

“All right; you’re mad at me. I get it, but I gotta battle to win right now!”

Picking up the second turkey leg, he considered lobbing it at Mario like the first one but quickly decided against it as he put it back down... and instead pushed the turkey itself off the table and onto the floor. With the turkey now at foot height, he calmly gave it a few practice kicks to himself as if he was practicing kicking a ball in order to get a feel for it. Once he was satisfied Luigi darted forwards with the turkey being used as a makeshift soccer ball.

While he didn't do anything to fancy (It was a turkey after all and might not survive any proper ball tricks) the green plumber actually managed to keep it under control as he made his way around the 'battlefield' while keeping an eye out for incoming attacks to dodge out of the way. Once he made a complete semi circle of the field (Ending up near the clearly armored Samus), Luigi brought his turkey 'ball' to a stop before winding up a kick in order to send it flying towards his brother's chest!

Glancing at Samus, Luigi couldn't help but smile a little. Yes, she was a very attractive woman (You would have to be dead not to notice it once you saw her without the armor) but unlike his brother he had never dared try and ask her out; She was out of his class and he knew that asking wouldn't go well. "Nice to see you again Samus. Catch up after we bury Mario under a pile of food?"

Despite, Mario's pleads for mercy and for the bounty hunter to lighten up, Samus was in no way interested in such negotiations. Thankfully for her, her sandwich torpedo worked just as she hoped. Despite the Italian's (meatball mariana) attempt to deflect the sandwich away from him, he didn't notice the fact that the missile was the one guiding it towards him. When he hit it, the missile exploded, covering Mario with the guts of the sandwich. The bounty hunter exhales in a "hmph" as smoke comes out of the cannon's barrel.

It was time to get some ammo. Looking around, the first thing Samus notices are several oranges lying around on one of the tables. Yet as she runs over to them, she completely forgets about the wolf (Amaterasu) and suddenly gets her face slammed by a black brush. She grunts in surprise as she kneels down onto one knee behind a downed table. She touches her face, wiping away some of the ink that was on her face. Samus didn't know who it came from, but had the suspicion that the wolf might've done it, considering she almost shot the poor thing. It wasn't of any intention however, she just wanted to get rid of the potato ball, but the wolf simply got in the way.

Samus tries to search the area for the wolf, possibly to get back at her, but she was nowhere to be seen. To her right, she sees a table fly towards Freeman, with the latter taking cover and firing back with cream puff 'grenades'. But she can't stop and just dally around like a little girl. The bounty hunter makes a dash to the next table and begins to stuff some oranges down her barrel. Just then, she sees another person land beside her @Bright_Ops. He looks much like Mario, only green and perhaps slightly taller than him. She also knew who this man is. It was Mario's younger brother, Luigi. She also knew him during the sparring matches in the annual Smash Bros tournaments, the same way she was introduced to Mario. And unlike the red plumber, this green plumber was actually a lot nicer than him. It's then when green stache' speaks to her:

"Nice to see you again Samus. Catch up after we bury Mario under a pile of food?"

As Samus, loads the last orange inside her cannon, she looks down at Luigi with a smirk and nods.

"You bet, Luigi." she answers confidently, as she puts on her helmet that's she's been grasping onto since she arrived, on.

She's now fully armed and ready for combat!

The bounty hunter quickly aims her cannon at the older brother yet again as she fires volleys of well-placed oranges towards him. She'll make sure that he won't try screwing around with her again.

The Lakitu was having a rather frustrating experience with this one, clouds are not known for their ability to exist underwater and his little transport was not faring well with the increasingly dense water, the need to constantly break the rules of the game physics in-order to maintain its existence or the large amount of hostile projectile firing wildlife. To top this off he was having to wait while the recipient and what appeared to be her mother had an argument over whether humans where people or not. He had tried to interrupt only to be pelted by a hail of energy blasts from the mother and had to make several looping journeys around the rock formation they were in to avoid being shot to pieces by aggressive energy firing frogs. After the fifth or sixth loop the mother appeared to have finally gotten bored or frustrated and left the addressed hero in a prison cell carved into the caves and left to preform some task. With this opportunity the Lakitu approached.

Naija was awoken from the unconsciousness that her mother always left her in whenever she left her alone, or got frustrated with her and was surprised to see a… small cloud with a humanoid turtle on top? Such a thing could not be, clouds where sky things not water things.

”Ah, I must still be dreaming, I thought for a moment someone had come to free me”

The Lakitu professed that it was real and went into its bag and retrieved… a soggy piece of paper with smudged illegible ink on it. He sighs and then regales the young women with the information the letter would have contained.

”the whole system destroyed?! I would love to help but as you can see I am is a bit of a predicament”

Naija hoped that she could use this opportunity to escape, fulfill her minimum required help that would be considered polite and then return to her family. She most certainly was not excited about the death and danger such an adventure would involve, not in the slightest. Right?

While she was thinking this self deluded chain of thoughts the Lakitu, frustrated with the whole series of events and worried of the mother's return grasped her hand and and quickly forced her to poke the smudged yes circle.

”what what are you doing? Let go of”

Her last words cut off as the teleportation whisked her away. The Lukito breathed a sigh of relief and fled from the cave to go get replacement letters for the other heroes. A short time later a great destruction and rage was set upon the cave and ocean as the mother tore it apart looking for her daughter.

Qbert had returned back down to the lobby to await any late arrivals when the teleport activated once more

”me!”

A large column of water appeared on the teleporter pad, it hung there for a moment while the Mithalan finished shouting then collapsed, flooding the foyer, washing the poor Qbert away as Najia was unceremoniously dumped on the floor.

Both she and the soggy Qbert picked themselves up, Qbert shaking themselves dry while She examined the splendor of the lobby. After a few moments of amazed science on the behalf of both parties she started bombarding the poor Qbert with questions, only to be met with an unintelligible response followed by an insistent signal to follow before heading of towards the elevator.

”of course, no one will ever just tell me things”

She performs a series of leaps to follow, jumping from a 4 legged crouched position like a frog and leaving a wet trail behind them both.