Compiling a convo that happened in the Discord's in character and off topic channel, for all of your enjoyment. Participants were myself,
@rocketrobie2,
@WXer, and
@Sir Lurksalot.
"Hey Ted, look at this comic I'm reading." Question says, shoving a comic in Ted's face.
"Look at that character, Rorschach. He's a lot like me. Almost a carbon copy. And this guy, Nite Owl, almost exactly like you. And they were partners. Do you know what this means?"Ted looks at the book
"... Some guy ripped us off?" Ted suggested, going over in his head how this was legal.
"No. This was written in 1985. Considered one of the best comics of all time. Neither of us were born then." Question pauses, placing a hand on his chin.
"Theory: when we were infants, we were given formula with chemicals that would make us subconsciously mirror these two characters. Our entire lives have been lies, Ted. If our lives go as the comic says, I will go off deep end and start killing criminals, you will retire and become pudgy failure, we'll team up one last time, and I'll be turned into a wet spot on ground by Godlike being."Ted had begun idly flipping through the book as Q spoke.
"Ok but Q, if that's the case, who are all these other people?""I've read that book. That Doctor Manhattan is one interesting character." said Polarity Man, phasing through the ceiling without his mech.
"Hurm," Q points at Doctor Manhattan,
"that's you, Polarity Man."Q points at Silk Spectre,
"Any female leaguer will do."Q points at Ozymandias,
"Clutch."And finally, the Comedian,
"Ravager.""Ravager will die. Clutch will fake an alien attack. You will have intercourse with whoever the analog for Silk Spectre is. And Polarity Man will turn me into a blood stain in Antarctica.""You do realize I can't do anything without the Patroller, except fall through solid floors? I doubt I have any potential for godhood.""Fine. You will turn me into blood stain in Antarctica via Patroller."Ted looked up at Q with a raised eyebrow,
"Intercourse you say?"
Q nods.
"Twice. Leading into a happy relationship. Of course, she will have intercourse with Polarity Man first...""Well there's your flaw!" Ted said.
"He'd phase through any lady right?""Hmm... Better increase the Patroller's security measures and run nightly OS backups. Wouldn't want a blaster malfunction, right?" he says, with his non-existent eyes burning a metaphorical hole at Q.
"Just solid floors and walls, if I recall correctly." Q replies to Ted, then turns to Polarity Man.
"Please. Don't want to interfere with fate. If I must be killed for sake of symmetry, so be it.""This isn't fate Q!" Ted exclaimed
"it's a book! Come on now, this is stretching it, even for you Q.""Also, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to leave it to chance whether or not I could give someone cancer. Book's got that wrong too.""Was all part of conspiracy. Manhattan couldn't give people cancer." Q says, then looks at Ted.
"Not stretching anything, Ted. Just stating facts.""Still, being composed of eighty percent negative rad isn't something to fuck with. Literally."Ted flipped through the pages quickly, looking for more inconsistencies until he had a break through.
"Ha! Mom didn't feed me formula! She heard some stuff about kids being raised from the tete growing up smarter" Ted exclaimed smugly
"no formula, no chemicals. That's still assuming there's any chemicals to begin with." Ted rubbed his temples as he normally did when talking with Q.
"They were planning ahead for that, Ted. The 'anesthetic' they gave her in the hospital while giving birth to you put the chemicals in her lactation."Ted moved his hand from his temples to his face.
"Vic. There were no chemicals in my mom's milk." he took his head out of his hand
"is that Nite Owl guy even a company owner?""Er, no.""Was Nite Owl blue? Did he get his name from the web?""No... And no.""What do you mean from the web?.. Did you use a name generator?""He did. He got Beetle Man. Changed it to Blue Beetle.""Huh. Wish I used one.""Polarity Man not doing it for you?" Question asks.
"I thought about using Mr. A at one point. But it just didn't fit. Plus, wouldn't be able to say 'that is the question' when criminals ask who I am.""It's not easy coming with a name from scratch!" Ted exclaimed at Polarity Man. Ted narrowed his gaze at Q,
"did Nite Owl meet Ror-roach in a Denny's parking lot going through trash?""Polarity Man never did. But, it's what I'm stuck with. Central command initiative and all that red tape.""... We don't speak of our first meeting, Ted.""...God, you people are loud." Rookie grumbles as he enters, very clearly fresh from bed.
"Just pointing out similarities between this," Q shows off Watchmen,
"comic's characters and ourselves.""Sorry to wake you up Rookie" Ted apologized as he turned his attention back to Q.
"And similarities are all they are!" Ted exclaimed.
"No, Ted. Not just similarities. A prophecy.""Ya mean that book where the only one with powers is essentially God, and we had to see his glowing blue dong throughout the movie?""Yes." Q replies in a deadpan voice.
"Well, doesn't that disprove your 'prophecy' right there?" The Rookie continues, glancing around to make sure Batman wasn't around before pouring himself a cup of Java
"We don't have just one guy with superpowers, we have a whole shitton of 'em.""Prophecy had to keep a few details vague, lest we be accused of ripping it off. Besides, was written when Superman was only well-known hero with powers. Probably thought no one else had powers. Wait..." Q pauses, then looks around to make sure Superman isn't there.
"Polarity Man isn't Manhattan, it's Superman. I'll be turned into a pile of ash by Superman.""...But Wonder Woman was kicking around in the Great War, decades before Supes first showed up." Rookie interjects again before taking a big gulp of coffee
"So he can hardly be called the template.""Yeah! Sure! What he said!" Ted said, hoping to get traction.
"Damn. Knew there was something I forgot." Q says, then throws the comic behind him.
"Guess I was wrong.""...I am going to treasure this moment forever."Ted pumped his fist excitedly as his thoughts of fate being fake washed away. This was short lived as his guarantee of banging one of the female Leaguers was dashed just as quickly.
"Oh well. But say what you will about 'prophecy' thing, there are eerie similarities between myself and Rorschach, as well as Ted and Nite Owl.""I'll give you that much Vic.""'Cept Rorschach has a cooler mask.""What the fuck did you just say?!" Question shouts, before taking a deep breath. Gritting his teeth, he replies
"Yes, yes he does."Rookie just smiles into his coffee mug, but says nothing.
"Little bit distracting though" Ted says looking at him on a few of the pages.
"Plus there's no consistencey to the blot!""I think that's kinda the point; It shifts around.""How does it do that?" Ted asked curiously, going over all the possible ways it would be able to change like it did given the time period.
"Mask made from technology from Manhattan." Q replies offhandedly.
"...Heat-sensitive liquid between two layers of fabric?" The Rookie puts forward, a bit unsure
"I dunno, I'm a mechanic, that sciencey shit's more your thing.""The city or the naked guy?" Ted asked Q.
"The naked blue guy.""Alright. I'll buy it.""Think you could make me a mask like that? Would ask Tot, but you're more likely to have technology to make it.""Probably, I mean I'm not good but Rookie probably had the right idea about heat sensitive pigments in the mask. Could probably make it purple too to match your getup.""Hell yeah." Q says, before using the bonding gas to remove his mask and peeling it off.
"So long, Pseudoderm; won't need you anymore." He pauses, then looks at the others before scrambling to grab the mask and put it back on.
"Huh. Ginger. Who'd've thunk it?"Ted chucked a little as Vic scrambled with his mask.
"I'll get to work on that later Vic.""NOT A GINGER!" Vic shouts, applying the mask and the gas once more. The Question releases a shuddering sigh.
"That didn't happen.""Woah, woah, it's alright, Q." Rookie states, casually waving his free hand in a calming gesture
"I grow rusty red stubble when I don't shave, so I'm not far behind ya.""Yes, but you didn't grow up in Catholic home for problem children where red-headed kids were beaten up by other children and abused by staff." Question says calmly, then sits back down on the couch.
"Another similarity: Rorschach also came from a prostitute mother and went to a home for problem children after a fight."Q pauses.
"And another: we both have red hair, brown eyes, and freckles.""You're not Rorschach!""Too many similarities, Ted. Conclusion is obvious: I am a clone of a comic character, created in a lab and implanted with false memories.""...So we're just gonna skim over the 'Nuns beating on redhead kids' thing? Because I got my car fixed up. We can go pay 'em a visit right now.""I'm not even a hundred percent sure that it even happened Rookie.""It happened to myself and another boy. Can go ask him. Still keep in contact with him." Q replies.
"Also, not sure I want to hurt them. All old and weary now.""Doesn't mean they're not hurting other kids. Worth going to take a look either way."Ted pointed to Q triumphantly
"how could you have fake memories if you have a friend from the orphanage!?""Not saying we break skulls, but heading down that way with some handcuffs might be a good idea.""No, you misunderstand. Already exposed them. Home closed down. They're in retirement homes or jail, too old to fight back, which is why I don't want to go." Q says, then turns to Ted.
"Oh. You're right. I'm a normal person.""Well, I- yeah sure. You're a normal person Vic.""Well, not exactly... Normal, I suppose. A person without implanted memories."Ted nodded as he handed the comic book back to Q.
"Huh? Oh, no, I tossed it for a reason. You can have it."Ted took the book back and looked at it then back to Vic
"thanks Vic, I'll give it a read when I've got some free time""No problem, Ted.""Sooo, uhh... anyone wanna go for a ride anyway?" Duncan began after a minute of silence
"Just converted the Bronco to diesel and threw a turbo in it. Wanna see if it can still climb.""Let's go, and leave this talk of Watchmen and redhead hating Catholics behind us." Q says, standing up from the couch.
"I'm game." Ted said as he continued to wonder if there was any grain of truth to what Q had suggested.
(Annnnnd, SCENE)(BRAVO)(We're winning a fucking Emmy for this.)
Kept in some of the OOC talk towards the end, but for the most part removed it all. Here you go, ya bastards.