2 Guests viewing this page
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Temporary
Raw
Avatar of Temporary

Temporary You See Nothing

Member Seen 22 days ago

Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Red Alice
Raw
GM
Avatar of Red Alice

Red Alice

Member Seen 2 yrs ago

@Moonlit Sonata Ajax is currently in the RP already, sorry.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Flood
Raw
Avatar of Flood

Flood Cyber-Phantasy Knight

Member Seen 3 yrs ago

Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Flood
Raw
Avatar of Flood

Flood Cyber-Phantasy Knight

Member Seen 3 yrs ago

@Red Alice

Well to be fair, it looks like the current Ajax is about to die.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Yukitamas
Raw
coGM
Avatar of Yukitamas

Yukitamas

Member Seen 1 yr ago

Rank: Brand

Much too high. Her abilities and political standing is far from being worthy of the title of Brand.

For comparison, Lord Archibald Kayneth El-melloi is from a most prestigious family of 9 generations. He is a notable lecturer in the Clocktower said to be have entered the position at the youngest age in the history of his department. On top of being set up with immense talent and political standing, he also happens to be talented in furthering his relations and managing said political standing. He is a man who both was given all the tools to succeed, and held the talent to utilize said tools to their full potential.

He is a man stated to be someone who could have revolutionized a field of magecraft if he had not died prematurely.

Even then it is only due to his connections and his political marriage that connects him to the family of the head of a Clocktower Department on top of his abilities as the head of the Archibald family that he has become a lord and Brand.

Of course Kayneth does deserve his ranking as a magus, and potentially he could reach a very high level of Brand but…

The point is that you definitely don’t qualify for Brand.

Objective for the Grail: Elizabeth has no wish for the Grail, being sent by the Mages Association to destroy it with the assistance of the Servant she has summoned.


Alice will send you a PM with your objective for the grail. However what can safely be said is that your goal isn't to destroy the grail at this point. Please simply say that you're going to Fuyuki as a agent of the clock tower following their directive.

Each time, she came back with less injuries, more people returned from each hunt as she improved her Spiritual Surgery.

Spiritual Surgery does not keep people from dying to vampires. You also cannot heal people from having their heads crushed, or just straight up killed in numerous manners even if Spiritual Surgery did work for healing flesh wounds. Which it does not. (Citation for such.
Spiritual doctors are said to heal the soul and not the body. I guess this priest here is the real thing, in contrast to his looks."
Interlude 10-4 F/SN Heavens Feel Route


For guidelines on what Spiritual Surgery can do look at Kotomine Kirei. While he is overall not good at magecraft, he holds the trait of spiritual surgery and is very talented at it. Examples of what he has done are remove worms from Matou Sakura, because worms are circuits. Albeit with the help of command seals. Graft a spiritual thing onto the spirit of an Emiya Shirou (Heavens Feel spoilers I guess. If you know about it, you'll get what I'm referencing) Also transferring command seals.

Eventually it was determined that she was the best in the Clocktower at it and so she was given the legendary title of Brand. 70 years passed since her birth and she became one of the youngest Magus to ever achieve the title of Brand.


She would be far from the youngest to achieve Brand, if she achieved it at the age of 70. The organization known as the Clock Tower that has existed for 2000 years has seen many freaks after all.
---

Number of Magic Circuits: A

Quality of Magic Circuits: A

---

Elemental Affinity: Average One

Inconsistent with your backstory. She’s someone from a branch that had to prove herself yet she’s got god tier circuits and a super rare trait that’s considered very valuable.

Also too high quality yeah. If you were part of the main family it could be argued for but I’m not allowing this.

Otherwise remember that affinities aren't just I cast fireball. The different elements have meanings that are added to magecraft, and also are the font of different magecraft. Average One is amazing because it can mix those different meanings. Consider for example Kayneth using his mercury with his affinities of wind and water because of their meanings of flow.

General Magecraft: A Brand level Magus on top of being an Average One, Elizabeth has mastered every element to it's fullest and mastered most general Magecraft over her life.


I don’t know why you’re talking about elemental magecraft under General Magecraft. It’s also impossible to master every elemental to its fullest. It wouldn’t be possible even if you were like a 2000 year old dead apostle ancestor. It’s not happening.

Spiritual Surgery: The art of healing, to remove a wound without ever touching the flesh. Indeed, it is the act of "cursing" someone to remove infection. A technique that both the Archibalds and the Archisortes are famous for, Eizabeth has taken to a new level. There can be nobody in the Clocktower who rivals her skill in healing wounds of the body, the only thing she cannot heal would be the "soul" itself.


Spiritual Surgery does not heal the body. The Archibalds are not famous for it. she is definitely not the best at healing wounds within the Clocktower either.
Spiritual Evocation: The ability to direct things of a spiritual nature,

As the name suggests it is actually about evoking spirits.

to even a dematerialized Servant's spiritual core,

You’re not messing with a servant’s spiritual core when they’re astralized. You’re not messing with spiritual cores with this to begin with.

Elizabeth has mastered this to a degree unknown to the Archibalds, taking many wraiths and stitching them into a sort of artificial intelligence bound to her will. She then pushed that intelligence into her Mystic Code, turning it into an autonomous attacking device.
This is very far from unknown to the Archibalds and isn’t really that exceptional by their standards. It's a useful ability of a spirit medium, but it's not groundbreaking.

Crest: 700 Years old


The Archibald family has the age of 9 generations.

The Archisorte family being a branch family is at a maximum around 6 generations old.

700 isn’t gonna happen

Reduce it to 200-400

Imaginary Space: A Mystic Code utilizing imaginary number space to store anything. The Mystic Code itself is her gloves, simply channeling Mana into either glove lets her deposit or withdraw anything she wishes, within a reasonable size of course. She has a variety of weapons stored in the Imaginary Space to supplement her skill with all sorts of weapons, along with a few pre-stored spells in case she needs to get out of a pinch quickly.


Her affinity is not Imaginary Numbers. As such she cannot operate this mystic code.

Pre-stored spells do not exist. Spells don’t work like that. The Edelfelts have their method of jewel magecraft for a reason as an example.

You can instead utilize high-speed arias (talk real fast) for faster spell casting. Or utilize magic circles to prep the formula of spells that are higher level and then just add an aria/cast like normal.

Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Yukitamas
Raw
coGM
Avatar of Yukitamas

Yukitamas

Member Seen 1 yr ago

@floodtalon

Family History: The Aesworth are a offshoot family of the Aesaurum, when a set of twins was born during the third generation of the Aesaurum family. The "younger" twin was cast out to begin a new branch family uder the Aesworth name, while the Aesaurum continued with the "older" twin. The Aesaurum family is five generations old by now, with a crest age of 400.


Branch families work by someone who is beginning a new family/making a new crest being given a donation of a small part of an established family’s crest. This helps them skip the labour and problems of starting from scratch. In exchange they tie themselves to the donor family and sorta serve them like vassals to an extent.

What normally happens in this sort of scenario you’re describing is something like Sola-ui or Sakura. Aka something to tie them to another family for political connections, and also they get to sorta continue a line of magi.

People within the Spiritual Evocation department noticed her talents and recruited her quickly, giving her plenty of materials to work with and better herself with. 30 years passed since her birth, with the Clock Tower recognizing her achievements and awarding her with the title of Pride after heading a joint project within the Spiritual Evocation department

It seems a bit of a stretch to go from dead apostle hunts to becoming a lecturer. Sure she might be good, but I don’t think she’s really going to get the chance to show that off to the extent needed for that with her set up and background. Furthermore she doesn’t have the political standing for this.

The Clocktower provided extremely rare materials to facilitate the experiment, handing the project off to her to test if she was as good at Spiritual Evocation and Spiritual Surgery as others claimed. The combination of a Nature Spirit and a young dead boy, an exceedingly rare event that can only be done by human hands. To give human values to something not human, very few of these "Guardian Spirits" exist. They must be bound immediately if they are to continue to exist in this world, so the newly made Guardian Spirit was quickly bound to the Leyline of another Aesworth's land in Germany. It would likely take another few hundred years for the spirit to properly "become human" so to speak

Why was there a project to make a guardian spirit. Like what’s its purpose? Why is this a group project. If it’s being made by the department then it has to have some sort of reason. Magi don’t just make things for no reason, they especially don’t get together for big projects for no real reason. I don’t really see the purpose or need for them to make a guardian spirit, especially if they’re handing it to someone unrelated to the project.

So she makes a Guardian Spirit (with the help of other magi)

They offer her a nature spirit as something just to test if she is capable of doing something she claims she can do.

I’m afraid this just doesn’t really present a convincing line of reasoning.

Spiritual Evocation: The ability to evoke and control spirits, from the lowliest wraiths to even Guardian Spirits.

Please remove this bit.

Overall I am rejecting this sheet in its third iteration.

Once more I suggest that at this point that you go with another concept.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Kyuuzen
Raw
Avatar of Kyuuzen

Kyuuzen

Member Seen 5 yrs ago



Sorry if I arrived to late to join or fill out this role
Also sorry if I messed something up

imprettymuchjustsorry
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Reflection
Raw
Avatar of Reflection

Reflection Slightly Stressed but Flawless

Member Seen 15 days ago

While you're not late, you're apping a character that is already in the RP.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Red Alice
Raw
GM
Avatar of Red Alice

Red Alice

Member Seen 2 yrs ago

@Kyuuzen

That character is banned as there is already a Yamato
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Kyuuzen
Raw
Avatar of Kyuuzen

Kyuuzen

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

Damn, must have missed him! I'll think about it more after class tonight
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Reflection
Raw
Avatar of Reflection

Reflection Slightly Stressed but Flawless

Member Seen 15 days ago

@Kyuuzen not your fault. Character was under identity lockdown until like 2 days ago.
1x Like Like
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Kyuuzen
Raw
Avatar of Kyuuzen

Kyuuzen

Member Seen 5 yrs ago



Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Red Alice
Raw
GM
Avatar of Red Alice

Red Alice

Member Seen 2 yrs ago

@Kyuuzen

Born: July 12, 1916

All Servants must be historic or mythological figures who lived before 1900 AD. Servants still "alive" as of 1888 can be summoned. Figures before Gilgamesh are banned. Additionally, Gods and such aren't applicable. Humans, mixed bloods, machines, and animals qualify as Servants. Try to avoid composite skills.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Kyuuzen
Raw
Avatar of Kyuuzen

Kyuuzen

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

@Red Alice

Oh! So then does that mean Archer Shirou or Assassin Kiritsugu are both banned as well? Or is it like a case by case basis kinda deal?

Sorry, I'm really scatterbrained today, I really should have already known not to use Lyudmila
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Reflection
Raw
Avatar of Reflection

Reflection Slightly Stressed but Flawless

Member Seen 15 days ago

@Kyuuzen It's more an aspect of trying to match a 1888's asthetic. It'd be impossible to get a relic for characters who weren't even born yet.
1x Like Like
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Phonic
Raw
Avatar of Phonic

Phonic The Pontiff Progenitor

Member Seen 3 yrs ago

@Kyuuzen It's more an aspect of trying to match a 1888's asthetic. It'd be impossible to get a relic for characters who weren't even born yet.


NAhh it is more like "It is impossible to obtain fame as a heroic spirit after the age of heroes is over" kinda deal. Like a sniper's sniper is more likely to get heroic spirit status than the sniper himself.
1x Like Like
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Kyuuzen
Raw
Avatar of Kyuuzen

Kyuuzen

Member Seen 5 yrs ago


Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Reflection
Raw
Avatar of Reflection

Reflection Slightly Stressed but Flawless

Member Seen 15 days ago

His skills are a bit skimpy. You should join the Discord group, and Alice and I can probably help you fluff it up more.
1x Like Like
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Paradox Witch
Raw
Avatar of Paradox Witch

Paradox Witch Sneers at Twilight

Member Seen 3 yrs ago

Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by addamas
Raw
Avatar of addamas

addamas Trust me, I'm a liar

Member Seen 1 yr ago

without further ado!

heeere's Raikou!



↑ Top
2 Guests viewing this page
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet