Laying on a blanket, salty drops trailing down his face from spending the past hour or two building himself a tent and going on a hike to clear his head, AJ needed to cool down. When he went on a hike, he had starburst in hand (sugary medicine to 'cheer the fuck up'), a water bottle latched to his belt, and a deliberate focus on the golden sun descending. As a precaution, and simply because he wanted to, he chose to make a tent and not rent out a cabin.

Fuck the cabins.

What's the point of camping if you're just going to resort to lodging? Pathetic. The lot of them. For being the 'pretty face, pampered one', who got on everyone's nerves, he seemed to be more comfortable getting down and dirty, more comfortable in the changing settings of nature, more comfortable with adapting, than a handful of them. You can thank his dad and Chris for that. His dad had the cliche rags to riches story, and Chris was Chris. Too prideful to take AJ's inherited money as kindness. If AJ lost it all, he believed he'd be fine. His mother and sister, on the other hand, not so much. That's okay. He'd take care of them.

Deeply sighing to himself, AJ rolled to his side, thinking about calling his Valentine. There was always the urge to rant to him. Did he have a problem? The problem of using Chris as a diary? Probably. But it helped. For clarity purposes. The fact that the trip was turning out to be a pain for him, somehow the Misfits tagging along too, when he had problems with people, specifically Tink, was total balls. The fact that Mandy bailed on them, not even saying goodbye but disappearing and leaving a text for him, was total balls. And don't get him started with the car ride where Emilia kept CRYING, all his efforts of cheering her up were TOTAL BALLS. Regardless, he kept his mood swings at bay, while glaring at the crackling fire projecting long shadows on the surrounding area. As much as he wanted to get lost in the glowing embers, his attention was brought to Sami's mention of Vegas.

Of course they'd want to go to Vegas too.

"I already have reservations at the Bellagio." His tone was barely enthused, "Surprise." His surprise felt empty due to everyone HATING him and Sami taking ALL the credit of a Sin City trip. "The invitation is open to everyone, and if you--" He pushed himself up to stare at the Misfits, purposely avoiding eye contact with Val, "-- aren't comfortable staying at the same pent as us, I'll just call my cousin for another room."

Being friends with AJ meant there were perks, and most that were close to him, knew his aunt, Theresa Kerkorian-Kable, had recently obtained her birthright, MGM Resorts International, which only elevated the status of his professional poker uncle, "The Archangel of Poker", Neil Kable, and his three cousins, Sonya, Elias, and Trent. To be honest, he felt their celebrity status was higher than his family's, but it could be the way they held themselves. Fame was what you made of it and the only thing AJ ever flaunted was his vehicle collection and prowess. His parents, a Technology and Media Guru and a Broadway Star, versus, his uncle and aunt, the Best Poker Player of the Decade and a Hotel Darling. You be the judge.

Fame was fame, and AJ knew he was lucky to be born without the troubles of those with barely anything to their name. The only reason he brings up his money is to take care of the people he cares about. He didn't really see it as obnoxious and disrespectful. If he had the money, shouldn't he share it? That made sense to him, but to some people, they just saw a rich brat.

"Bonjour Monsieurs~! Mademoiselles~! A fine night around the fire, no?!"

Before anyone could accept or decline Sami and AJ's offers, a hippie looking dude invited himself to their fire. Silently, AJ watched the older man strum his guitar with no care in the world. No worry. AJ could tell by looking at him that there were no ill intentions, just a man who wanted company and who fed his wanderlust on a daily. "My apologies les amis if I interrupted, I am simply another traveler looking to explore the world and your fire seemed so inviting." It was refreshing. To be around someone who didn't share similar plights as this odd group of high school graduates.

"How has your day been?" The sweet refrain of the acoustic guitar was nearly in sync to the song playing on the radio. Maybe this was a change in pace AJ needed to be in, to stop brooding and take action. To stop being a baby. Live a life of no worries. Hakuna matata, right? The lion cub needed to take a note from those loved ones and better himself. Without them, he would be only an asshole.

Yes, this was their summer! And dammit, they were going to have FUN.

"Shitty, but I'm over it." Picking himself up, AJ opened up the cooler and gestured for the hobo to take something, "Help yourself to food and drink, dude. You look like you've been walking for days."

With that, he looked back at the large group, "Think about it. Getting another room is just a phone call away. Let's stop wasting our summer being bitches." He should apologize to Val... bury the hatchet, even if it means saying sorry. Internally, he was growling at himself. He hated saying sorry. He wasn't even in the wrong! Opening his mouth to call to her, wanting to ask for some more time to talk, he decided against it. It wasn't the right time. Okay, he was going to be a little bitch for a bit longer.

"I'm going to make a call. Tell ghost stories or play a game. Do something. Get drunk. Have fun!" After turning on his heel, AJ strolled away, down the hiking path once more, and pulled out his phone. Fortunately, he had a portable charger and he could make this call. "Call my Valentine."

What would he do without his phone?

Not uneducated of the area that he was in, AJ didn’t walk too far from the campsite. Those that hiked in the backcountry, off the established trails, are advised not to travel alone. In addition, there were over 20 hiking trails with different difficulty levels, and it was night, which meant it was even more dangerous than it would be during the day.

He hoped his friends, and their friends, didn’t decide to go on a nightly adventure, and if they did, he hoped they weren’t dumb enough to stray from the path. Knowing this unpredictable batch... Who knows!

Truly, no one wanted another disaster, right? Like in the form of venomous rattlesnake bite or falling off a cliff…. right? He hoped not. However, things weren’t looking so hot for them. It was their first day and there was already an accident and a fight. Both where he was at the center of it. Was this a smart idea? A last hurrah road trip? No one seemed to be enjoying themselves. No one seemed to want to do this anyways.

Why was he getting depressed all of a sudden? Wasn’t he just inspired to say ‘fuck it all, let’s have a good time’? Sighing to himself, he headed towards the visitor center. Let’s hope they’ll stay put and take it easy. They had a hobo to entertain. The closest hiking trail to the visitor center was the Moenkopi loop, difficulty level easy. Deciding the best reception place was probably here, he took a seat at a picnic table. Still in sight was a now minuscule bonfire.

His lips curved into a sheepish smile. Gaining distance from everyone gave him some relief. He felt like he could catch a break. It was times like this where he could see the world stopping, as he took in the beauty of his surroundings. The night sky. The fresh air. The humidity. If it weren’t for all the negativity in his mind, one could say nature and travel brought the best out of him. He wouldn’t know. Right now, he cared too much about what everyone thought about him. Right now, he was the fool that wrecked a shitty RV. Right now, he was guilty for hurting Val.

After he slipped on his bluetooth and his service slowly connected with the nearest satellite to call Chris, AJ leaned back, so he can stare up at the view. Reception was barely at the mid mark, but it did get through. The ringback tone was all AJ could focus on, as his narrowed eyes studied the distant lights entangled in the sky of midnight velvet.

Armed with a bowl full of mint chocolate chip ice cream, hot fudge, and chocolate sprinkles, Chris elbowed open the door to his room and kicked it closed behind him. Dinner with his mom went well. It was just the two of them, Gwennie was busy. That was probably for the best, because her being around would have lead to more rolling around in the sheets and less preparing for tomorrow’s exam. Not hot blonde distractions tonight.

Chrysler had done as much as he could to study for his practical. He knew what he knew and his hands would do what they’re capable of, and that was that. If he failed… well, he could always just become a wandering vagrant or something. Hopefully he wouldn’t fail, but Chris always thought it best to never get his hopes up. Less disappointment that way. With his fate more or less decided, the teen plopped down into his futon bed — currently in couch mode and covered in a mess of blankets — and began to engage in Netflix & Chill all by his lonesome. You know, the actual literal PG version.

As soon as he had lifted the first spoonful of sweet confection to his lips, his phone buzzed in his back pocket. Lifting a cheek, he pulled it out and screened the call. AJ, oh boy, this would require pausing Peaky Blinders. His best friend was known to be quite long-winded on the phone. And in real life. Basically all the time. He got that from his momma, from what Chris gathered of the duo. Lord knows how his dad could handle all of that drama under one roof.

“Ahh, he lives.” Chris answered the phone mockingly. Having not heard back from AJ until now, it seemed an apt joke. “Still smiling?”

Grin. “How can I not smile while talking to you?” Playfully teasing, AJ could admit to himself that hearing Chris’ voice did help elevate his mood. It was gay, but whatever. “You ready to ace your exam?” For once, AJ wasn’t steering the conversation toward his turmoil. Friends gotta’ be considerate of others, sometimes.

Chris looked down at the bowl of sin in his lap. “Uhh… I’m stress eating ice cream and contemplating if I’d be a decent criminal. That count?”

“You’ll be fiiiiiine, Chris.” Sitting up, AJ brought his gaze back to the small fire in the distance, “As a criminal and a mechanic. I bet you could do both.” He snickered, his laugh echoing in the receiver.

Mm, ice cream sounded baller right now.

He chuckled at AJ’s response. He hadn’t considered both as an option, but maybe. “Thanks for the vote of confidence.” Even if all else failed, Chris could always count on having AJ in his corner. “So how’d things shake out earlier? Did you get my texts?”

Did I get your texts? Clearing his throat, taking a moment to run his right hand through his unruly hair, AJ cheesed in an anxious kind of way, “I did... but. I was a little preoccupied.” After another moment, he rubbed his hands together and thought of his next words. What to say, what to say. Deciding to let out another laugh, simply at the thought of remembering what transpired hours ago, AJ assured his lover boy, “Don’t you worry, Valentine. I still got my shiny teeth.”

“Yeah I wasn’t too worried, not when ya have the crazy russian with ya. So everyone’s alright then?” Chris said before taking a big minty bite of ice cream. Cold. The spoon was very cold. Brain freeze incoming.

“No… not necessarily…” His voice trailed off and his eyes went down to the ground as if Chris was right there, giving him that stern, grumpyface look. How could he lie to his friend? He just couldn’t! He’d plead the fifth. “Soooooooo… the shitty — like why were they even driving — RV, was owned by the Cuban guy from my school, y’know, Sami? And it might’ve ended with me, errrr, making Val… emotional. BUT IT ISN’T MY FAULT!” He suddenly defended his honor. “SHE BLAMES ME FOR HER PROBLEMS AND I MIGHT’VE YELLED TERRIBLE THINGS BACK AT HER THAT I KNEW WOULD HURT LIKE A BITCH!”

Ah, there it was. Classic AJ. Chris blinked a few times, partially because he was recovering from brain freeze, partially because he was digesting information. Cuban guy named Sami? Chris had recognized the voice from the phone and wondered if it could be the same guy he went to middle school with. Maybe he transferred to rich bitch school at some point, Chris had no idea, he’d kinda fallen out of touch with most of his old crew since he got kicked out. But that was neither here nor there.

“Val, huh? Weird that you guys would run into each other randomly like that, but I mean like… you’re both always kinda like that…” Like what exactly? Was there a word for it? Like what happens when a tornado meets a volcano, just like that one song said. But that song was about a couple, and AJ and Val weren’t a couple. Buttt, maybe they should be? Whatever, not his business, as long as AJ fulfilled his end of the bet. “Just like, wait for things to cool down and apologize. Get her some food or some shit.”

Swiftly and with complete disgust, AJ retorted, “Why do I have to apologize?!” Just thinking back at the fight, he was getting heated. Maybe they needed to talk sooner rather than later, only so he could burn the bridge down. Hellfire! “It’s MY fault she pushes me away because what? I loved Jamie? Break up happens. Boom. She’s back! Then Mandy comes on in and I’m just a GOOD ASS FRIEND. She ghosts me again. Like what the fuck??? Y’know what. I’m NOT going to be the better person. Not this time. Why should I?!” He was standing up now, ready to start round two.

“Jesus, calm your ass down, aiight?” Here he was getting all riled up when Chris was trying to have a relaxing night. At least this distraction was keeping him from stressing about tomorrow. “First off, you should apologize because only pussies don’t apologize when they know they fucked up, and YOU just TOLD me that you said some things in the heat of the moment that you probably shouldn’t have. Own your shit, be a man.” The advisor ate another scoop of ice cream in a breath between lines. “Secondly—” Chris began, with a mouthful. “Are you really that thick headed? This shit is so obvious, you know why she’s flyin’ off. She’s jealous, dude.” On god, why did this kid need so much help getting it in.

The rich, naive, so naive boy had a response in his head after Chris told him to be a man. It would’ve been a heavy sigh and a simple ‘you right’, but the next part shook him. “What?” The anger dissipated and his feet that were planted in the sand felt... light. He felt light. Jealous? Really? Of what? Of ME?

Breaking out of this sudden trance, AJ laughed it off obnoxiously, “Pfft. Jokes. Chris is full of jokes.” It was unbelievable. Uncanny! Unheard of! She got jealous over people hanging over Nate, not him.

“I ain’t jokin’, dude.” Chris replied with an exasperated laugh. He set down his bowl on the end table with a porcelain clank. Grabbing his smokes and a light, he made his way to the window and opened it wide so he could blow out the smell. Last thing he needed was his moms whirling in and losing her shit too.

“Think about it. You just said it yourself, right?” Chrysler took a long drag and then exhaled. “Y'all were tight as hell, but then you get a boyfriend. And you in love and spending all this time, probably engaging in all kinds of PDA because you a slut for sure, so she gets bent and backs off. But then you break up, and guess who comes back trying to get it in? Things go back to the way it was for a while. But now you run into Val, and you got this hot lil honey in your passenger seat heading out on a summer vacation together, and she goes bananas. You see it now, bro? She wants to be that honey.” This shit was elementary, as far as Chris was concerned. How on earth was AJ this oblivious? Must have dated a dude for too long, forgot the complex ways of women.

As much as AJ wanted to continue to be in denial, the painted picture Chris just shoved in his face was too daunting, too shocking for him to fight back. Was he that ignorant to her feelings? Those darted eyes that stabbed the back of Jamie’s skull, while he kissed his first love in the hall. Or when he rushed to give her a hug and she just shouldered him, ice cold. Calculating and mapping their memories, he could see a difference when he took her out, she at his side, and when he was surrounded by everyone, but her.

When Mandy needed a place to stay, Tink didn’t agree it should be with a guy. Mandy was housed at his place, and Aleks, and other guys’ cribs for that matter. All who Val considered her close companions… was he this stupid? “...it’s just platonic.” He whispered, more to himself than Chris.

How should he feel with this newfound information? Part of him couldn’t believe she liked him more than just a friend. Part of him was… confused. Extremely confused. If she loved him, really loved him, why would she lie? Why didn’t she just say it? Like really say it.

“I dunno man, just think about it is all I’m saying. Girls get weird about stuff like that, can’t just say what they feel.” Not his girl though. Chris was blessed with a girl that did nothing BUT speak her mind, all the damned time too. He wouldn’t want it any other way though. “Apologize, clear shit up. Carry on with your trip, you’re supposed to be having fun, bruh.” Chris took another drag. “Where’d y'all end up tonight anyway?”

Get it together, dumbass. Mentally scolding himself, choosing to focus on the present and not looking at Val in a different light, his stomach unpleasantly pleasantly unpleasantly curling on the inside, AJ calmly answered, “Red Rock. All of us. Every. Single. Fucking. One. Of. Us. Minus Mandy. Mandy bounced. Sami hates me. Emilia keeps crying because when she sees me and Matt she probably thinks of scum. Most of ‘em don’t like me because of what I did to Val. Yessi hugs me close to her tits. Aleks is exhausted. The usual. And oh, we have a new hobo friend that speaks french.”

Red Rock? That probably meant they were camping instead of hotelling it. For a moment, Chris felt a pang of missing out. He loved camping… not so much the drama that seemed to be surrounding this particular trip though. Chris nodded as he listened along and then stopped at the last part. “Wait, hold the fuck. You have a what?” He flicked a bit of ash out the window and let the night breeze take it. “Y’all a bunch of white people out there camping and are just chill with a hobo joining you? Haven’t you seen any horror movie ever, this is why you guys are usually the stars of ‘em. You don’t see asians doing that.” You don’t really see asians camping at all, but that was beside his point. Point was, they were probably chillin with a crazy french ax murderer and AJ was way to ‘eh, whatever’ about that.

“It’s all good, Chris. When I get back to the site, they’ll all be singing kumbaya and be drunk as hell. He has a guitar, my man. He’s strumming to that song Gwen just played on the radio. It’s super chill.” The vibes told AJ they weren’t in danger. The french hobo was amicable! And didn’t remind him of his mother, or anyone on her side of the family… now that was SCARY. Always give his mama what she wanted, or the house would catch on fire. Literally. Yep, yep. Regardless, he was more concerned about other matters. “Don't worry about a thing, ‘cause every little thing gonna’ be all right.”

Chris just shook his head in response which, of course, AJ had no way of seeing. If things were to go horror movie, they’d probably be okay with Sami and Aleks around. Maybe not Aleks, actually… he and Yessi would be the pair that got killed because they were fucking in the woods. AJ was the pretty boy, he might last about halfway through the film. Anyway, hopefully his friend’s assumptions were correct. “Whatever you say, Bob Marley. Did the hippie bring you some weed or something?” Chris laughed at the uncharacteristic musical reference.

Shrugging to himself, AJ slowly, very slowly, strolled back down the path toward everyone else (there was still a bit of distance), “Iunno. We just met him. I called you LITERALLY right after.”

Stopping himself in his tracks, realizing how unusually nervous he was, returning to his original concern, he hesitantly asked his friend, “...is this trip even worth it?” He wanted to say fuck it and carry everyone’s burdens… but for some reason, this first day, just getting to their first destination, it was all crashing. Was he that afraid to lose everyone and grow up? He was a walking disaster and as his past has shown, especially with Jamie, he damages the things he cares about the most — on purpose. Maybe this last hoorah is his way of saying goodbye, move on, and hurt them before they hurt him. Maybe he was thinking too much and needed a drink.

Yeah, he needed a drink.

Worth it? What did he mean by that? The kid was the walking embodiment of more money than brains — not that he was stupid, he just had that much money. AJ could afford this trip ten times over, of course it was worth it. He was surrounded by his friends, sure a couple of tagalongs joined in, but whatever. One of them is a friend too! Knowing his best friend, Chris figured there was some deeper meaning with that question. Maybe he was just bummed that he wasn’t there to. Was it egotistical to think that? Eh, whatever… “Of course it’s worth it man, you had a rocky start, but you’re gonna have a blast. Save all that worrying for the real world, you’re on vacation now. Go have a drink with your definitely-not-a-murderer hippie friend.”

Yeah, he was right. AJ needed to get in vacation mode. It would be easier with Chris at his side, but whatever. He wasn’t going to put guilt in his Valentine’s mind, the day before his big test. Friends don’t do that shit. “I’ll snap you his face.” The pretty boy jested (not really, he was going to), before deciding it was time to let his friend go until tomorrow a minute after his exam ends, “Good luck, Chris. Don’t let Gwen’s tits distract you.”

“No luck, just skill.” Chrysler responded with slightly feigned confidence. “And I’ll do what I damn well please with them tits. Have fun, I’ll see you soon.”

“I MISS YOU ALREADY.”

“Are you enjoying yourself, Goldie?”

Emilia was so far gone in her own little world, appreciating Kim’s warmth even if there was very little of it actually coming from the brunette, that the sudden words whispered in her ear jolted her upright, releasing Kim from Emi’s grasp. She turned around to get a look at who did such a thing, only to spot one of the people she was calling for not moments ago. “AJ!” she exclaimed, far happier to see him this time than their last encounter… and the previous few hours. “Heyyyyy you!” She tucked her hair back behind her ear… then repeated it a couple more times because the feeling of her own hair on her fingers was awesome. “Heyyyy, I… I gotta apologize for the ride here. I’m so sorry I was all sad and stuff. It will never happen again!” Sober Emilia would never be able to promise that, but this Emi was trying to spread happy, and it started with making up for the sad.

“It’s okay. I really don’t mind.” AJ observed the blonde carefully. Okay, that was a lie. The whiskey was hitting him hard and his primitive brain was leading the charge. He had endorphins telling him to stop having a pity party. Enjoy himself. Make sure the girl was okay. Simple thoughts, really, but at least he wasn’t thinking about Val, or Jamie.

His brown gaze softly rested on the ray of sunshine that was Emilia Seger. Her eyes were a deep, ocean blue, and her hair had a thousand shades of gold and looked so incredibly soft. Did AJ ever get this close to her before? He couldn’t recall because while she hung over Brandon, he was with Jamie, or Val. His attention went up toward the blunt being passed around and then to Sami: “I’ll pass, dude. I’m gonna’ take another walk.”

With a charming prince smile, he looked back to Emi, ignoring everyone else, including Aleks who seemed to be having a nice conversation with Ellie. Offering his hand while standing upright, he gestured for her to come with him, “Can we talk? I’d like to apologize too.” He seemed to be set on pulling her aside, with or without her permission. For as long as his patience would allow him, he would wait. He hoped she’d come on her own accord. If he can provide some comfort to her about her ex, he would sure as hell try. But first, she had to grab his hand.

Emilia tilted her head slightly, letting her hair fall back to the side. She definitely knew she had to do more than just apologize to AJ. There was a lot to talk about. The earlier incident near Bell Mountain. The prom. The past two years of football practices. All these thoughts were starting to circle in her mind. However, the drugs in her system were incredibly effective at preventing yet another breakdown. Hell, now, talking about all those things felt like a good idea. Emi looked over at Val, her usual outlet for her problems. She seemed busy with Jules over something. She couldn’t hear what they were talking about. Kim didn’t sound very pleased with the hugging she received. Umbra was… somewhere. Maybe she did need someone who saw the other side. Maybe AJ would let her talk. Even if he was probably more invested in the locker-room side of the story.

The blonde looked back up at the fire dancing off the sunglasses that dangled off AJ’s chest, the shadows in his hair flickering with the flames, the extended hand offering an olive branch. She offered a smile, goofier than she intended, but again, something else was in control of Emi now. “Sure,” she confirmed as she took AJ’s hand and hoisted herself up from the fire. “I mean, I dunno what you want to apologize for, but sure!” She dusted the dirt off the back of her dress and looked back at the Gearhead. “Let’s go!” Probably too enthusiastic, but it was still genuine.

“We’ll be back, eventually.” Holding onto her hand delicately, as if she were made of porcelain, too fragile to handle wrongly, AJ first went to his tent, where a backpack was resting outside of it, and retrieved his flashlight. Briefly letting go of her, he threw his backpack over his shoulder, just in case they strayed away from the familiar path, and gave her the light to hold. “We’re not going too far, but I think it would be nice to look around while we talk. There’s this big arch a half a mile away I’d like to take you to.”

Emi flipped the flashlight on, delighting in the light zooming across the Nevada landscape according to her whims. She giggled as she put a particular sage bush in the midst of a strobe light disco. As AJ straightened up, she nodded at him. “Sounds pretty!” She retook AJ’s hand. The physical contact just felt intoxicating at the moment. “Lead the way!”

AJ would be lying if he wasn’t taken aback, even in his inebriated state. Having gone to more than enough parties, as one of the hot jocks — though he did it out of boredom and not because he cared about the sport — he had more than enough experience in alcohol. Unlike most of his comrades, aside from Aleks who preferred starburst over a can of beer, he hated the taste. He did it socially, not because he liked it. That being said, seeing Emi like this was… weird. He knew she was a bubbly ass girl, but never to this extent. Maybe her mental state was temporarily allowing herself to ‘be happy’ until the waterworks came again. Honestly, AJ was preparing for the worst. With Emi, you never knew when she’d start hyperventilating, “Someone’s in a good mood, did you get a love confession or something?” Maybe that was a question in poor taste. It probably was. He started striding on, making sure that he kept a firm, yet gentle, grip on his friend’s dainty hand.

No one said he was the best with words.

Emi put the flashlight up to her face as she thought for a second, forgetting that it was meant to be lighting the way to the arch. “Hmmmm, I dunno!” she admitted. “I mean, I know I was really down earlier, but it’s just like, it doesn’t matter anymore! Maybe I just needed some sugar or something, because since I ate those M&M’s earlier, I just feel better!”

“You want some more? I got starbursts, thanks to Aleks.” For another second, AJ released her, hoping she wasn’t going to fall or anything while he retrieved the candy from his bag, “It’s good to see you smiling. You haven’t, in awhile.” Pulling it out, he brought it to her and waved it in front of her as they walked. “Here.”

The blonde greedily grasped at the offered candy and managed to grab a couple of pink ones. Strawberry. Her favorite flavor that wasn’t watermelon. She unwrapped one and popped it in her mouth. “Mmmmmm, yummmmy…” she said as the fruit flavors mingled on her tongue. They tasted even better than the M&M’s!

Satisfied with the candy, Emi’s attention went to AJ’s other remark. “I know I haven’t been myself lately, and it feels nice to be able to have something to smile about again. I don’t know what it is. It just…” It almost seemed like the MDMA was beginning to wane, but nope. Just another pocket of flavor in the candy. “It’s been hard. And again, I’m so sorry it didn’t happen sooner, because I know it made for a really bad car ride, and you didn’t deserve that, AJ. You didn’t do anything to have to deal with me like that.”

The archway was gradually approaching. The desert at such a late hour was like an eerie sea, with silhouettes of cactus, that resembled ghost ships on the wavy sands. The night made things seem different than they were, and yet the black tranquility of the sky made him feel at peace, even if he was a little tipsy. “Emilia, stop.” With his right hand, he gently grabbed her and pulled her toward him, so that she was staring at him face-to-face, eye-to-eye. “Stop apologizing for hurting. Stop feeling guilty because your ex didn’t see how fucking amazing you are. I should be the one saying sorry! I should’ve SEEN. I should’ve been able to help! But I wasn’t there. I let it happen. I let him hurt you. And that makes me awful.”

It was a forceful action. Then again, those seemed to be necessary nowadays to snap Emi out of whatever funk she was in. It seemed weird she would be in a position to pull someone else out of the depths, but AJ seemed genuinely hurt by everything. It made sense. The difference between junior year AJ and senior year AJ was noticeable, and it didn’t take a Swift fan to see why. Even from as far away as she was at the time.

Emilia put her hand up to AJ’s as it rested on her shoulder. “AJ,” she softly spoke. “You couldn’t have known. There was no possible way to know. I didn’t even know until I was left there at prom.” She rubbed his hand as if to put him at ease, but really it just felt great, on both her hand and her shoulder. “If anything I should still be saying sorry to you! I mean, I’ve been sitting at home, wasting my time thinking about that stupid fucker and feeling sorry for myself, when I could have been reaching out and getting some help with this…” She stopped moving her hand and continued to lock eyes with the Gearhead leading her among the phantoms of the canyon, seemingly giving their respective demons life in the night. “I just… I’ve never felt this kind of pain. This kind of hurt. It’s so overwhelming. I know Brandon is a fucking asshole, but you know that feeling when you just kinda give yourself to someone, and you make them a part of you, and then they just rip it away. You’re never OK after that. I’ve just been making it worse. I should have talked to someone sooner. Val or Kim or Umbra or… you, I guess.” A slight breeze picked up, blowing some strands of hair across Emilia’s face as she continued to gaze at the boy who had caused so many tears today, yet was now drawing some necessary confessions out of the blonde.

“You’re a champ for crying about it. You might not say ‘help, I'm hurting’ but it’s there. I see you.” Only letting his gaze lay on her face for a second longer, he looked away and allowed himself to fully drop the mask, showing his vulnerabilities. The black night held them close and although substance was the main reason they were sharing, their hearts were entwined for this moment in time. “And… you’re facing it. You’re not pretending. You’re in so much pain, and you release it. Like, fuck, Em.”

Unlike her, he kept so much bottled up. Yes, his friends knew he was still drunk in love with his ex, but he never shared the exact details of everything to them. There was no proper disclosure. They didn’t see what happened behind closed doors. He didn’t share how bad he hurt his ex. He didn’t share that he was the fucking asshole in their story. He just played it like Jamie was his property and he hated that someone else claimed him, when really, the guilt ate at him — for the pain he caused. “Y’know standing next to you, it makes me realize how much of a fucking coward I am.” His eyes became glazed with a glassy layer of tears. He looked up to the sky to put them right back where they came from. Crying was for pussies.

Taking a deep breath in, as they finally got under the arch, AJ shook his head and turned his miserable face to her once more. A face where memories weighed heavy. “Break ups happen for a reason. They suck. Fuck, they suck. I wasn’t there for Jamie when he needed me and then after he was gone, I couldn’t let go. And the same goes for Val! Our friendship is fucking over because I’ve never been good at making people feel good about themselves. I’ve never been good at seeing what they want. Emilia, I made him so insecure, and I do the same with Val. What-the-fuck is wrong with me?!” At this instance, AJ was just about to reach his breaking point as he aggressively started pulling his shaggy hair.

It was an unusual position for Emilia to be in, watching someone else struggle with their emotions and just break themselves down into a puddle. At least lately, it was unusual. Sure there were meltdowns at clubs because leaders didn’t think they would get off the ground, but this was a whole new level. This was something Emi recognized in herself. Hell, she had been there three times today. But for AJ, this seemed to be even more self-destructive than her own.

Emi grabbed a hold of AJ’s hands and pulled them away from his head, holding them down as much as she could, despite her relative lack of strength and her desire to keep rubbing them.

“I release it because honestly AJ, I don’t know what else to do. Like I said, I don’t know this. I’m so not used to this. I have no idea what to do with this. There’s a part of me that wants to hunt Brandon down and kick him in the nuts until he coughs up his balls. But then, there’s that other part that just wants to know why. Why was I so easy to cast off like that? And there is no way to get any closure on that. He just bailed. Scurried off to San Jose to leave me here in this absolute mess. Leaving me here to deal. And I don’t know how. So I cry. I cry because I’m stuck like that.

“I don’t think there is anything wrong with you, AJ. I think we all deal with our tragedies in different ways. They may not be the right ways, but they are what we got. Have you been a bit self-centered about the whole thing? Probably. I mean, we never really talked so I can only go off what you literally just told me. But if that’s how you deal, then that’s how you deal. And if that’s making you crazy, then dude, you need to realize that yourself and make that change. Kind of like you’re doing right now.

“And for what it’s worth, Val is pretty hard to shake. You’re going to have to do worse things than that to get her to completely cut off the friendship. I mean, do you know how many times I have sung Ariana in her face? And yet we’re still friends.” It was a lot for Emilia to unload in that instance but her goal was to help AJ in that moment. The fact that she was finally getting some things off her chest was just a happy side effect.

She was… making a lot of sense. It was weird that he was finding comfort in someone he didn’t know as well as Chris or Aleks. But, it was refreshing. Maybe hearing these words from someone outside his usual circle was exactly what he needed. The alcohol was like a truth serum and made him spill out his heart. He didn’t know when it would stop — when he would shut up. He needed to shut up.

Suddenly, he had an urge and rather than think about it, he just did it. He pulled Emilia into an embrace and buried his face in her luscious, blonde waves and as if he really needed to do so, he let himself silently cry. How unmanly of him. “I don’t know if I want to be ‘just friends’ with her.” AJ whispered in uncertainty.

Emilia's eyes widened upon hearing that news. “Oh… Ohhhhhhhh! Oh," she stammered as she patted AJ on the back. It seemed like the right thing to do. What wasn't the right thing to do is what she said. “I...I didn't know you were interested… in that way. I mean, with Jamie and all…

“Yeah, well. Shit’s complicated. I didn’t think I was interested either. Until today.” He closed his eyes, not realizing how honest he was being nor holding any regrets for sharing it with this ball of sunshine. Her hair smelled nice. It was part of the reason he was calming down. “It’s okay. She would never want me.” He admitted, knowing he was getting in over his head. “I’d hate myself, anyways, if she felt like my rebound.”

Emilia nodded as she continued to comfort her friend. “I mean, not to say you couldn’t, but it’s probably a hail mary throw at this time, and yeah, you never want to put anyone else in the position of being the rebound. Although, I could probably go for some of that right now. I mean, I don’t have a lot to compare to, but I don’t think Brandon was very good. He kept saying it wasn’t about the size, but he really didn’t know how to use it…” She was spilling way too much now. Definitely the “pop rocks” coaxing that level of discourse out of her. But it was Brandon, so who cares how many people knew. AJ probably knew. They had been in locker rooms together for years.

For another time, he was taken aback. He pulled away from Emilia and gawked at her. She couldn’t be serious? Did he hear wrong? Was she offering herself to him? That… seemed… wrong. Especially after this pitiful conversation they had just shared. Well, Emi was hot. He’d give her that. And too good for him. Double the points. But did he want to fuck her and show her a good time? “Em… I’m kind of drunk. Would you be okay if we just laid together? I’m not saying I’m not interested, I just… don’t want to take advantage of you. I’d rather be sober if I make the decision for us to test the waters. Is that okay?” Fuck, he was such a goddamn pussy. Who the hell declines such a good offer? He does obviously! “We can go in my tent and share stories? I can tell you a lot of stupid shit about Brandon.”

For the first time since she took the MDMA, Emilia had a moment of clarity. Did she really just offer herself up to another man like that? Right out of the blue? Especially another football player? Didn’t she swear off anything football related? All of a sudden she was very confused. However, AJ didn’t budge. He didn’t take advantage. It was clear he wasn’t a Brandon. If Emi had three Mike’s in her, Brandon would have been on her faster than he could ice a bro with the fourth one. It was sweet that AJ thought like that. Another point in his favor. Besides, having sex in the canyon sounded like a rough time.

The blonde held the flashlight up to her face so AJ could see her smile, even if the light did make it look slightly creepy. “That sounds like a great idea. Brandon did so much stupid stuff in private, it makes the Kardashians look like Harvard grads.” She gave AJ a soft hug before quickly retreating. “Oh! I can get the rest of the pop rocks from the cabin too! They are so weird! I don’t think they are a good flavor of pop rocks, I don’t know why Matt would give me brown ones, but I mean, I guess they worked all right, right?”

“Pop rocks…” A sudden and abrupt lightbulb went over AJ’s head. WHAT THE FUCK, MATT?! Oh-my-GOD. Emilia was on DRUGS. Now he HAD to watch her. Tomorrow, AJ would make sure to punch the shit out of that motherfucker. “I have a better idea. Or well, better candy for you to eat.” He paused for a second, before adding, “Where are those pop rocks, exactly?” He hoped he didn’t have to explain himself. He really didn’t want the sweet little bumblebee to have drugs on her, sharing it with everyone. That was a recipe for disaster!

“They are in the cabin, I think they are still on the bunk bed,” Emilia admitted, laughing after she did so. “I thought I could eat them all at once, but I only got like half the bag in my mouth. Guess I’m not as good with my candy as I used to be.” She was leaning right back into the endorphins now. “But hey, your candy is much better tasting. I like strawberry way more than I like... whatever the heck brown is.”

“You know… it’s getting pretty late and we have a big morning ahead of us. I don’t want to waste nice snuggle time, so let’s head back. You can make yourself comfy in my tent and then I’m gonna take a quick whiz. How does that sound, Bumblebee?” Yeah, he liked this nickname over Goldie. It suited her more.

Emi giggled as she retook AJ’s hand. “That sounds awesome!” She looked up at the stars over the arch. They almost seemed like they were dancing in the night sky. She felt like dancing right now. “Thanks for taking me out here, Shades. I needed to see something like this… and to talk about this too. You’re a good listener.” She leaned against AJ, much like she did to Kim earlier. Only this time, she was a bit steadier.

“Maybe…” He slid his hand around her waist, pulling her close. “We don’t need to rush. Do you want to dance?” As if AJ read her mind or something, he didn’t, he just felt it was right to offer, he waited with a caring smile, all the while looking down at her pale face. His mama didn’t raise a fool (okay sometimes he was foolish). Pulling out his phone, he added another question, “Any requests, milady?” Naturally, he assumed she wanted to.

A goofy smile spread across Emilia’s face. “Play me some Break Free, DJ!” Of course she was gonna ask for Ariana. She always asked for Ariana.

Word. With a quick swipe with his phone, he went to his dance playlist, which did have some Ariana Grande. Yeah, he could get jiggy with that. The song washed over the desolate area and under the archway, he let the good vibes flow in him, first, pocketing his phone, and secondly, dancing like there was no tomorrow.

Yeah, after such a shitty day, Emi was the perfect medicine and this song. This song felt so right. It let him forget about all his problems. The music moved him like a puppet and although it was dark as shit, minus the flashlight, he loved how this was just their moment. No one knew what they were doing. No one could take this away from them. No one mattered, but them.

And, ya know, AJ could flex his dancing skills. If there was one thing he wasn’t a fuck up at, it was knowing how to have fun on the DANCE FLOOR. This was only a sneak peak for what Las Vegas had coming for them. His feet moved to the beat and his hand took it upon himself to twirl his partner of the night, as he watched her blonde hair bounce. God, he loved her hair.

“Thank you, Emilia. I needed this.” He mouthed.

As the blue-eyed girl spun around, light flickering wherever her right arm cared to go, she could feel a lot of negative emotions leaving. This was fun. This was carefree. This was more like herself. It was like having someone else in that space she was living in lifted them both up out of that pit. Into this moment. Into this beautiful, unspoiled moment. No matter how the two of them got there. It felt so good.

The flashlight barely caught AJ’s mouth moving and Emilia continued to smile as wide as she had in a long time. “We both did,” she mouthed back before launching into another rendition of the chorus, her voice ringing out over the desert, breaking through the night. It didn’t matter what time it was, or where they were, this was beautiful.

It truly was. And she was cute.

This night they’d allow themselves to be a rainbow in the darkness.

They deserved it.