This was new territory for Andrew Green, and he was nervous. He was breaking rules like never before! Leaving the building at 8AM when he wasn’t sick was a landmark moment for him. In the back of his head, he reminded himself this was probably what dad would have done. Dad, Aunt Hailey, both grandmothers,
and his grandfather would have approved of what he was doing. Sneaking away to smoke weed was pretty par for the course for a Green, especially the generation before him. So why did Andy feel so bad about it?
Even as he settled into the passenger’s of his brother’s car, Andy still had the smell of oranges in his nostrils and the feeling of her breath on his neck. Andy was, for the first time in his life, infatuated. He wanted to chase it forever, but his brother had warned him off of it initially. As much as he didn’t want Ethan to say something he didn’t want to hear, Andrew found himself with a need to ask.
“Is Amy really as bad as everyone says?” Andy asked earnestly as they pulled away from the parking lot, heading toward the Sunshine Diner where they could grab a bite to eat. Andy hadn’t been sure about skipping so many classes, but Ethan had confidently assured him there was nothing to worry about. Besides, this way he’d have some time to pick Ethan’s brain before he made any
more stupid fucking decisions.
As the air of silence filled the room, he looked out the window and watched the city roll past them. He thought about it, wondering how much of the encounter he wanted to tell his brother about. He adjusted his glasses, and wondered if his father had ever been in this position. His brother? Was he the only Green who had ever been motivated by a pretty girl?
“She said I looked good with the guitar.”“And she complimented my singing. No one’s ever done that.”“So I’m no one?” Ethan questioned, his tone was flat and unamused. With his backpack on his lap, having stopped at his locker to get some of his stash prior, he pulled out his grade school
lunch box. Placing the vintage lunch box on his lap, he tossed his bag to the backseat before putting all his focus on his treasure. He had customized it to have its own compartments rather than go out of his way to look for a good weed storage system. Plus, he loved TMNT. One compartment had his weed (which he had different types of flower in small lidded jars). The others were for his rolling papers, his tips and his grinder. It was all organized and placed in a way that made the most sense to him. His vape was actually in his pants pocket but he didn’t want his brother’s first time to be a vape.
This was an important moment for Andrew Green so he was going to do what any little brother should do. He was going to roll his brother a joint with hash. He preferred blunts because the mix of cannabis and its tobacco wrap gave an added buzz. It also had more flavors available in wraps. Most people thought it was gross so he could only assume his brother from the same mother would think the same. Nothing was wrong with a good joint and he was always down to clown if someone was offering. He loved a good joint. This was a celebration though! Andy deserved the best and honestly, his brother was the best of them all.
Sorry, Diana.
He was biased.
Hash would give off the same effect as a blunt anyways. He’d do a nice Maradona hash joint and before Andy knew it, he’d feel euphoria, relaxation, maybe some creative stimulation, a bit of a cerebral effect, and obviously, increased appetite. Good thing they were in the parking lot of Sunshine Diner. This was going to be lit. Splitting the layers, breaking his hash up into tiny pieces, Ethan continued,
“I’m kidding, I know what you mean. You want someone to notice you that isn’t me. Amy is just…” His voice trailed off as he grabbed the rolling paper and filter.
“Trouble. She made an enemy out of someone that had a lot of dirt on her. Like this person was wired in conversations and hacked her phone or something with her nudes….” He looked away from his workstation (his lap and lunchbox) to briefly meet his brother’s gaze.
“I don’t want you to get caught up in that mess, man.”“I don’t think you’d let any of that stop you.” Andy said, and shrugged.
“It shouldn’t stop me either, right? I mean, sink or swim, y’know?” Andy watched his brother work as he talked, wondering what he was getting himself into. It was hardly his first time being in the presence of the drug, but it was his first time being
this close to it while it was its rawest form. There was something mystifying about it. The smell of weed filled his nostrils, burning away whatever remained of the orange scent he’d tasted earlier.
“I can’t sink or swim if no one lets me jump in the deep end.” Andy was well aware it could end poorly. He didn’t know that much about the situation at hand, but even from what his brother had just said, it seemed like she was the victim. Not the other way around.
“Isn’t trouble a Green thing, anyway?” He asked, letting the question hang in the air. He wasn’t sure what he was doing. He’d never stood up for himself this hard before, and he was starting to wonder if all he really needed was a girlfriend. It seemed to work for Ethan - in fact, it worked so well that Ethan had three, or four, or five. Andy had lost count.
“I’m not scared. I’m usually scared, so I want to see how this plays out. It can’t end that badly. I mean, doesn’t grandma always say she can buy our way out of any problems we get into?” She did. That was true. But bringing his grandma up as a positive? Andy really was pulling out all the stops he could to try and get his brother on his side. He knew Ethan well enough to know that in the end he’d side with him, but Andy didn’t want it to feel so
terse. What would have happened if Ethan had interrupted a few minutes later?
“I’ll be fine.”Tapping the filter gently against his lunch box to get everything settled, Ethan didn’t respond right away. Instead he focused on the joint. It was almost ready. Since they were going to smoke it now, there was no need to twist the top. He grabbed his gold zippo lighter and lit the joint slowly and evenly. At this point he could make a joint in his sleep if he really wanted to. It was second nature to him. Smoking in general was second nature to him. A nasty habit his girlfriends didn’t like but something he thought made him look just like the characters in the movies he enjoyed watching. Truth be told there really wasn’t anything complex or deep about Ethan Green. He did what he wanted and what he liked consisted of three things: movies, freedom, his specifically, and girls. In the grand scheme of things, to those that knew him, knew he was just a teen boy trying to have a good time, not necessarily a long time. His stash box was a testimony in itself of how young he still very much was at heart, not thinking about his future, only thinking about the life he lived right now. Ever present, ever in the moment. Here.
Taking the first drag, closing the zippo while he did so, he took his time, allowing his brother to observe him. He drew the smoke in, deeply, and held it there for a few seconds before letting it seep out of his mouth and into the air. Offering the joint to his older twin brother, he gave a lazy smile,
“Lesson number one. Don’t ask for permission. You want this girl? Go get her. It’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission. At least then you’d already done the thing and won’t be missing out.” Missing out especially at this school was the worst. There were plenty of things going on and he knew once they graduated he, his brother and his cousins would have to buckle down. If his brother didn’t want a life jacket on anymore, he wasn't going to stop him. Safety’s off. He was the last person to lecture him on good and bad decisions but if this is what he wanted. Like really wanted. He’d support him, no matter what. And if he sank, he’d make sure to save him. That’s what brothers were for. Though if he was in the deep end with him, they could drown together too, but neither was alone and that was what mattered. He had Andy’s back, regardless if his choice in women was questionable.
“Also shit man, don’t bring up grandma. You talk way too much about our family. Lesson number two. Stop thinking about everyone else. You wonder why everyone helicopters you? If you’re like mom this, dad that, grandma this… bro. Stop. They ain’t going to hold your hand when you're in bed with Amy. What about you? What can you do to be the man you want to be? Without the Green name attached, I mean. Make this YOUR year. Fuck everyone else. Including me.”Andy frowned. It wasn’t like he was asking people to helicopter him, they just did it. He didn’t ask his grandmother to have a direct hand in guiding his future, but she did it anyway. He didn’t ask his parents to treat him like a baby while their golden boy got to do whatever he wanted. They just did it. Andy didn’t know what he was supposed to say, and so he watched his brother hitting the joint he’d rolled in silence. He made some solid points, but Andy wasn’t fully sure Ethan understood his position. How could he? Ethan was everyone’s golden boy! Andy was… Andy. Getting out of his comfort zone to try new things was hard for him, hell skipping class was a big deal.
But that was okay, he supposed. It wasn’t even going to be the biggest deal that week, he had a date. At least, he thought he had a date. Had he even gotten Amy’s number? How was he supposed to contact her, especially if they were meant to give her a ride? Andy was thinking, and thinking long and far too much. He was lucky, though, that Ethan was a bit of a rambler. By the time Ethan was talking about making this his year, Andy's mind was made up.
Ethan had a point, he did need to start seizing opportunities. He stared at the joint that he awkwardly held between two fingers, and found himself wanting to say more negative things.
It’s easy for you! He wanted to scream.
No one had ever even asked him how he felt about the tiger incident. No one had ever asked Andy how he got into the pen. The truth was… when his dad turned away, Andy had jumped in. When his mom was crying though? It was hard for a nine year old to admit he’d done something so stupid, so Andy had just lied through pursed lips.
“I fell in, mama. I’m sorry I scared you…”He lifted the joint to his lips and pulled in, drawing the smoke into his lungs. He sucked and he sucked until he couldn’t take anymore. He held it in, like he’d seen his brother and his father do a thousand times before, and when he couldn’t anymore he coughed with a closed mouth, desperately trying to do a good job. The smoke spilled out of his nose, introducing Andy to an unpleasantly unique feeling he hadn’t known was possible before that moment. He opened his mouth and drained the smoke, hacking and coughing as he did so. For a first timer, Andy had done well.
Unfortunately, his coughing didn’t stop as he handed the joint back to his brother. Andy had done well slurping the marijuana into his system, but now was the hard part: handling it. As he coughed and coughed, he shook his head and looked at Ethan for desperate approval.
“is it… kaff supposed kaff kaff to be like this? kaff kaff” He looked at his brother, and wondered aloud.
“This is kaff kaff kafff where I die, isn’t it?”Ethan couldn’t help but smile at his brother as he watched him take a hit. A bigger one than he expected for a first timer to do but he respected it no less. Gladly, he took the joint back and assuringly said,
“Just ride it out. You’ll be fine.” Placing the joint between his lips, freeing his hands, he reached in his back seat and pulled a bottle of water, just in case his bro needed some. While placing it in the drink holder in the center console between them, he took a long drag himself, sucking it deep enough so he could join his brother in a coughing fit, so he didn’t feel like he was alone.
“See.” Ethan coughed.
“Totally kaff normal.” He offered the joint again.
“We ain’t eating until we smoke it all, so you best keep going.” As he took the joint back from his brother, Andy was slowly beginning to realize what it meant to be high. He felt like every hair on the ends of arms stood straight up. He blinked a few times, amazed at how quickly his mouth and lips were drying out as the effect of the weed really started to sink in.
Shit. Is it supposed to feel like this? He stared at his brother, waiting for a response. It was almost a whole minute before Andy realized he hadn’t actually used his words, and he had just been staring at Ethan with his mouth hanging slightly open.
Maybe, Andy thought to himself,
dad’s right. Maybe this shit is good for you. He lifted the joint up to his lips, either unaware or not caring about how goofy he looked, and took another fat hit.
This time, he mimicked his brother, tilting his head back before he let out the smoke, blowing it into the roof of the car. He licked his lips, and rubbed his eyes.
“That’s pretty good,” he offered the joint back to his brother along with his words before another coughing fit struck and Andy found himself wondering how his brother could smoke as much as he did. It was a miracle Ethan could speak clearly with all the cigars, weed, and cigarettes he smoked.
“I’m going to be so high. Do I look high? Oh man, I know I look high.’ Andy was rapidly approaching the state of highness where paranoia crept in, something that would either pass with time - or with smoking even more weed. After Ethan took the joint from between his lips, Andy picked up the bottle of water that Ethan had sat aside for him.
He ripped the cap off of the plastic bottle and dropped it in the floorboard, and tipped the bottle back to his mouth. He pushed it forward, smashing against his lips as he drained the bottle in seconds. He dropped the crushed water bottle to the floor alongside the cap, then looked at his brother.
“I need more water. Or food. Or both.” “Good thing we’re at a diner. Come on, let’s get some motherfuckin’ pancakes.” Ethan grinned, excited to be part of this experience with his brother. His phone beeped loudly with an iconic jingle that was like the bat signal for the Elite. He checked his phone, seeing the other texts from his girlfriends and deliberately ignoring theirs to focus on what mattered. His boys. Looks like they had an impossible task they needed help with later. Seemed easy enough. After texting
bet in response, he pocketed his phone again and puffed the joint one last time. Man, this shit was good.
“You ready big dawg?”