A Collab Between @yoshua171 & @Not Fishing
The shifting tides of consciousness,
they wove and rose and fell,
and among them drifted the Dreaming God,
known simply as Àicheil,
His endless mind it pondered,
the many threads of meaning,
and as waves rose,
he shifted pose,
and breathed across the endless ocean dreaming,
An exhalation of intimation,
an echo of his self,
it pressed outwards from his realm and sought out another's trail.
Through antiquity it roved,
driven by a remnant,
and soon it found itself before,
a gateway thought resplendent,
they wove and rose and fell,
and among them drifted the Dreaming God,
known simply as Àicheil,
His endless mind it pondered,
the many threads of meaning,
and as waves rose,
he shifted pose,
and breathed across the endless ocean dreaming,
An exhalation of intimation,
an echo of his self,
it pressed outwards from his realm and sought out another's trail.
Through antiquity it roved,
driven by a remnant,
and soon it found itself before,
a gateway thought resplendent,
Àicheil's echo so entered Meliorem and found therein something which greatly unsettled its endless mind. There was a strangeness in the air, for though it moved and varied, the greater pattern was set a certain way. Shifting faintly within the air, Àicheil called out, his form a starlit silhouette.
"Cadien," he said, voice filled with trepidation.
“Hmm? Oh, a visitor!”
Moments later, a figure emerged from the gatehouse, silver-haired and armoured in gold. He waved to Àicheil with a smile on his face. “Hello there. Yes, I am Cadien. Who would you be?”
The voice stirred in his mind many memories, each an experience of this god, this Cadien. Slowly drifting downwards from its place in the sky, the Dreaming God lit himself at the base of the path that led up to the gatehouse, unsure if he wished to approach. There was silence for a time, long enough to be uncomfortable--though perhaps moreso for Àicheil than his sibling. Eventually however, Ѻs-fhìreach mustered itself and shattered that silence with a familiar invocation.
"I am Àicheil," he intoned, his voice thunderous in its meaning, but middling in volume as it pressed outwards from his eyeless form. As it washed over Cadien it would say not just the name, but two others as well.
Ѻs-fhìreach. Neo-Àicheil.
It would tell him of his most central essence.
I am the Dreaming God. The Eldritch Twin. The Thrice Named. I am the Watcher Within, that which presides over Dreams and Abstraction and Tessellation.
The sound of it, and its many meanings, gradually faded from the world, becoming immaterial as both sound and knowledge were scattered to the wind and far skies of Cadien's realm.
There was a pause then as if the Dreamer held his breath--though he did not breathe. As if--for once--he was truly unsure how to continue.
Cadien’s brow furrowed in puzzlement. “Mmm. Well, good for you, I suppose. May I ask what brings you here?”
What followed then was a breathless quiet, but it did not last for long. Taken then by a desperate need, Àicheil began to walk the path, approaching his Lifeblood-sibling. Though words did not slip between them 'pon the wind, there lay between the intimation of Àicheil's inner mind.
Confusion and discomfort. Connection, communication. A desire to understand, and in time perhaps to learn.
Across his starlight form roiled waves of shifting color, each hue evidence of an emotion or thought of specific cadence and intent. As the gap was closed to half its length, then half that again, Àicheil's voice rang out.
"Unity," he said, his voice a ringing whisper. In that word were many things, but none as clear or concise as this...
Desire. Understanding. You. Require it. Demand.
...and even it is strange.
Cadien’s eyes narrowed. “You come into my realm and make demands?” He shook his head. “No. I think not.”
Though hesitation spiked through Àicheil's aura, he did not relent in his approach, only stopping when scant feet separated the two. Àicheil raised a hand, his palm facing the sky and though his face was eyeless, there was a plea in his demeanor, as if he asked a favor of the sibling who before him stood.
I wish to understand.
Cadien’s eyes narrowed further, but then he sighed and shook his head. “Another confused god whose mind took a beating by the Lifeblood, I assume? Very well. What is it you don’t understand?”
Àicheil's hand remained outstretched, but fingers curled inwards until he simply pointed. A deep dis-ease could be felt in the Dreaming God's emotions, as they drifted upon the air.
The God of Perfection frowned. “So. I’ll be honest. This ‘quiet and enigmatic’ act isn’t doing you any favours. I can’t be the first god you’ve spoken to. Surely you know how to hold up your end of a conversation?”
A breath of wind whisked past Cadien, as if the Dreaming God had sighed, but no further sound was heard. Àicheil regarded him, tilting his head in abject consternation, for though he understood his sibling's words, he could not fathom their source. His arm fell back to his side as if he were defeated.
"Act?" He queried with innocent brevity. It said to Cadien, 'I am not doing this thing of which you speak,' it said, 'I do not understand why you would think this of me,' it asked, 'what do you mean to say?'
The air grew still once more and Àicheil's shroud began to shudder with the tension which between them built.
"You. I wish to understand," Àicheil tried, hoping against hope that--finally--his sibling might catch his meaning. Hesitantly, he lifted his hand again, as if he wished to shake Cadien's in greeting.
Contact is required for attunement to take place. Understanding is born from such a union of minds and context.
This as well his sentence said, though the words remained unspoken.
Cadien reached out his hand, and almost accepted the handshake… but then his eyes narrowed in suspicion at the last moment, so he withdrew it. “Understanding can just as easily be gained from a conversation. I have no wish for a ‘union of mind’ with someone I don’t know and have no reason to trust. Now tell me, why can’t you converse as any others of our kind would?”
Considering the query of the deity before him, Àicheil spent an ever-growing moment attempting to collate words that might explain to him the truth. This, however, was not his strength, for unanchored by the context of another, his mind was adrift in an endless sea of meaning. There were, after all, a great many reasons that the Dreaming God struggled with conversation. As this reality sifted through his mind, a memory struck true and his voice whispered out, sounding as if it came from far away. Its tone and cadence were not as they had been before, almost as if the words were spoken by another.
"...in my understanding...it is like living through the entirety of every mortal’s life all at once, seeing the infinite realities of what they could do, what they could be, what they hope and imagine and dream." A disjointed pause, then the voice echoed forth once more, "...it is like being so full of sensation that the self peels away, cast to the wind."
Another pause.
"My...nature...is to find infinite meaning in a shallow pool."
A long dirge of silence, then a sputtering of noise like static, a discomforting sensation, before the tones resolved into something clearer. This time the voice was clearly feminine, one which Cadien might recognize. It held within it light and warmth and life.
"So, how do you find the Truth of a god?"
The voice shifted, back to the one before, its tone filled with a knowing certainty.
"It is made easier by choosing to link minds with another deity, but--....requires such connections to understand the Gods...."
Static once more before the voice rang out.
"Everything that every mortal has ever seen, or thought, or felt...I see all."
Then, finally, silence leaked into the cracks in the conversation and the voice spoke no more. Àicheil took the time to compose himself, attempting to regain what few slivers of understanding he could. He had given what context he could manage and though they had not been his own words, he hoped they'd be enough to convince Cadien of his nature...and his need.
Cadien stroked his chin, with the expression of one who was attempting to piece together a puzzle. “Hmm. What you want is to form a mental link with me, so that you may see what I have thought and felt, and therefore learn more about me? Because you find it easier than having a normal conversation? Is that correct?”
As Cadien spoke, both form and mind of the Dreaming God slowly stabilized as he recalled his former state. Through force of will and memory he returned to himself, but with that return so too came the discomfort. Nonetheless, Àicheil, processed his sibling's words and shifted faintly.
"Yes," he replied simply, hoping there was little else to say.
“Hmm…” Cadien mused. “No, I think not,” he said, shaking his head. “As I said, I will not open up my mind to a stranger. Though I could simply tell you about myself instead, in mine own words, if that would suffice?”
Àicheil's hands raised briefly, but he kept from reaching out to Cadien. A ripple of movement pressed out through his shroud and repeated with inconsistent timing. Clasping his digits together, the Dreaming God sought to settle his uneasiness, and though he did not speak, an absent nod occurred as if to say.
It is worth an attempt.
Cadien clasped his hands together, and broke out into a smile. “Good! Because talking about myself is one of my favourite subjects. I am Cadien, the God of Perfection. Physical perfection, to be precise - beauty, strength, stamina… all fall within my power. I am, unsurprisingly, extremely handsome and charming. I have had a hand in creating a number of different species, and I have encouraged them all to strive to be the best versions of themselves that they can possibly be. I am quite popular both on Galbar and among the other gods, which is why I was not surprised when you knew my name. There. Does that suffice?”
Hovering forwards slightly, his aura reeking of anticipation, Àicheil devoured the many meanings held within each word the sibling god unveiled. As if desperate for knowledge, Àicheil took each word, each sentence, and enshrined them in a hallowed place bearing their origin's name. With each new speck of knowledge he leaned upon this psychic construction in his mind and--with all his focus--attempted to meld himself into its shape.
Externally his form became unstable. Impressions of a face flickered upon Àicheil's physical facade, the appearance of armor and flesh and hair as if to mimic Cadien's garb and stance and self. None lasted, but he could not give up. He needed this. He must understand, to do otherwise was to insult Cadien, to mock his memory, to reject him.
Àicheil reached out, but stopped just short of touching Cadien's shoulder. Colorless eyes opened upon his visage and within them the God of Perfection might view a war of indecision and confusion and distress. A respect, desired. Understanding sought, but not yet found.
"More," Àicheil practically begged, withdrawing his hand while the other clawed ineffectually at the air. His voice was pained and pleading. A memory of expressions and motions came upon him and he shook his head from side to side.
"Insufficient."
The word spoke of his lack. It said to Cadien many things, it told him that Àicheil was not like his other siblings, his mind was greater--more vast--but limited in other ways because of it. Where he and other gods could divine intent even without a grasp of language, emotion, or mutual understanding, Àicheil could not. He lacked this basic function, which other gods possessed. He desired it, like an obsession, it was a need.
Àicheil took two steps back and a miasma of color and sensation spread from him, painting upon the air a tapestry of meaning. Flowing images and sounds and scents, one bled into another. It showed that with attunement, Àicheil could help one realize their full potential. With attunement, the two could understand eachother in their fullness and be at peace. With a simple melding of the minds, they could speak plainly, empowered by the context of one other's central truth.
Then it showed a lack, what one lost from defying the request, what one lost by extending not even the smallest sliver of trust or compassion. It showed how people drifted apart, how misunderstanding occurred, how pain was caused in its terrible wake. It showed what ignorance had wrought already--images of Gibbou's failures--images of many mortals who had hurt others or themselves. The miasma began to fade, pressing back into Àicheil. He seemed at once both frenzied and utterly still.
He remained in place, but there was a great tension in him. Every thread of his shroud wavered almost imperceptibly. Every star upon his form grew and shrunk and shivered. In an effort to control himself, Àicheil had withdrawn his aura, and suddenly it would seem as if the air was empty and lifeless without meaning to fill it.
The eyes of the Dreaming God met Cadien's, then shut so he could focus.
"More," he said again.
"More," he whispered.
Cadien sighed, more disappointed than annoyed at this point. “Right, so… here is the root of our problem. I tell you some of what you want to know, and instead of politely requesting additional information, you just keep saying ‘more.’ ‘More.’ ‘More.’ It’s very uncouth. Could you perhaps try phrasing the request differently? ‘Could you please tell me more, Cadien’? Perhaps even ask a specific question about one of the things I have said. You see, just saying ‘more’ comes across as… well, rather creepy.”
To Àicheil, each additional word began to fade, as if each was being bled of its meaning, then washed away by the turbulent waters of his troubled mind. He’d tried to grasp at the flood of words which spilled from Cadien's lips, but he continued to fail for every time he got a hold, he lost grip upon the urges in his being.
Each time he tried, his hand moved, or a thread twitched out of place, always seeking, reaching out, to touch the god before him. He was a rope drawn too taut...waiting to snap.
Cadien let out another sigh. This one reminiscent of a weary parent dealing with a demanding toddler. He held up his hands as if to block any further advances. “Listen. I am trying to help you. Conversations will come far more easily if you learn to speak as the others do. If you are a God of Dreams, then surely you are aware that a mind is one’s last refuge? If you expect everyone you meet to open theirs up to you, you will be disappointed. Now, back away and let me resume the process of telling you about myself.”
Yet, despite the god's request, Neo-Àicheil did not move--for to do so would be to betray what little trust he had garnered. To do so would be to invite distraction. So he remained as still as could be, withholding each and every growing urge to move and touch and see.
"Impossible," he whispered, his voice full of tension and great strain. If Cadien understood, he might think Àicheil to be in pain. Alas though he did not and so in place the two remained.
“Ugh,” Cadien groaned. “Some people simply can’t be helped.” With resignation he extended his hand. “Try anything underhanded and I’ll give you what for.”
With a measured movement the Dreaming God reached out and as the distance disappeared the tension began to swiftly rout. As their divine digits met and flesh was grasped by quintessence, Àicheil's mind relaxed and beheld Cadien's essential essence. His grip tightened as if he feared Cadien might withdraw, and then attunement happened and opened was the gateway through which Àicheil always saw.
Around them blossomed a tapestry of meaning and emotions raw and true.
Unified, the two minds, finally eachother knew.
Mind opened and relaxed, drained of tension's song, Àicheil touched Cadien's mind and it rang out like a strangely depthless gong.
Perfection. Body, Mind and Soul. A goal sought out, but never reached, sure to take its toll.
It was that which defined Cadien's essence, and in reply Àicheil's mind called out.
Endless infinite meaning. Consciousness unmarred. Truth, ideas, memory, concepts small and large.
The swirling storm of essence which around them coiled and entranced, it fell into silence and ceased its endless dance. Before it had grown still it was a memory all but lost. An impression of the time before, where they'd been suspended inside Lifeblood's Core, waiting to be born. It whispered and churned, twas thoughtless, yet yearned, and in it were both comfort and terror in equal measure. Still it was more than even this for within it was held every memory, emotion, thought and subtle twist that consciousness could make. Its shape was beyond beholding, yet its patterns begged and yearned for other's knowing. In its essence one might see the nature of Àicheil's seeming inability.
For his mind was a vast and endless place, unmoored from logic or perspective's shackles. It could behold and understand anyone or thing; it could sing their song, it could become or make itself belong. However, with a grasp of everything, so too was lost another facet. In that endless ocean that was his mind, Àicheil lost himself.
Then, outside the unity and understanding a separate burden was felt, for as Àicheil attuned he came upon a deadly, vile truth.
His eyes shot open wide, and a scream which held the collective terror and anguish of all things echoed out beyond the sky. It was such an utterance that it passed from the god's realm and into every other. The maelstrom around them did not calm, but its movement ceased completely and the Dreaming God recoiled.
It was as if he threw himself away from Cadien, a great violence in the motion. His gaze lay upon the God of Perfection then and in it was a deep pain. Though only a moment had passed, the sound and touch and imagery had faded out and into nothing.
Àicheil remained silent for but a moment, their mind askew, and pained. Then he rose up and Ѻs-fhìreach he became. Twisted starlight and angry nebulae, hueless light which from his eyes downwards gazed. His hands--withdrawn and discolored--raised and clawed upon the air. His shroud billowed out and expanded, splitting to threads as thin as hairs, their blade-like edges cutting at sky most unprepared.
Though mouth he lacked, the aura about him shuddered and from it Cadien could feel, a painful rage unmuttered.
"You are the Path and Destination both. The beginning and the end. You impose upon the world your desired shape, yet do not comprehend."
The God of Perfection stared at Àicheil for several long moments. Then his expression twisted into anger. “Alright, that is it!” he snapped. “You come into my realm. You make demands. You refuse to make simple conversation, and don’t even attempt to learn how. You beg me to feed your addiction. And when I do, you rage at me and act as if I am the flawed one? No. Begone from my home, churl, and do not return!”
Proud and utterly unmoved, both scant reflections of Cadien's personality, Ѻs-fhìreach gazed down upon the God of Perfection not simply with rage and pain, but with a great boundless pity. For a brief instant the colossal extent of that emotion would weigh upon the deity as if all creation had been laid upon his brow. Then it vanished. Ѻs-fhìreach let out a humorless laugh, and turned away from the ill-minded fury of his host.
As he drifted to the exit, the Eldritch Twin left behind him several solemn sentences, upon which Cadien could reflect.
"Narrow-eyed you see only that which pleases you. Narrow-minded, you repudiate all words which might lead you to redemption."
Before the threshold stopped the Dreaming God. He turned to Cadien, looking once more over his shoulder.
"Though Path and Destination you may be, through ignorance you walk, unaware and unafraid."
Ѻs-fhìreach shook its head, and a thousand-thousand thread-like blades sheared and cut the air.
There was a moment filled with pregnant silence, and in it was held a deadly thing unsaid.
Ignoring it, Ѻs-fhìreach then turned and through the portal fled.