RPGuild's Spam Hunger Games: Summer Slaughter edition

[Vilageidiotx]

Forgot Azarthes inner sadness.

[VarionusNW]

You also forgot VariousNW, a completely seperate entity from VarionusNW.

[Dinh AaronMk]

I also forgot the Jews, but they can breath a sigh of relief that I did.

[Joegreenbeen]

I also forgot the Jews, but they can breath a sigh of relief that I did.

@Dinh AaronMk

[Wade Wilson]

Hi. I present me and everyone's favourite Deadpool:

WEAPON XI!!!

[Vilageidiotx]

I also forgot the Jews, but they can breath a sigh of relief that I did.

@Dinh AaronMk

Justice for Azarthes inner sadness! We won't stop bitching until Azarthes inner sadness gets its fair due!

[Klairre]

I'll sign myself up!

I also nominate Aquaman and Melinda May.

[Dinh AaronMk]

Good to know I have plenty extras.

[Dinh AaronMk]

I have actually ran the sim, taken the screenshots, and edited them. It is thirty-parts long. I will begin posting them tonight.

[Dinh AaronMk]

And we're off to the races!



And now let's strike up those wild summer tunes, as brought to you by Mike and The Mid-Morning-Afternoon Misfits!



So let's get down to the murder:



Vilage begins the initial grab-bagging with some heavy munitions, taking with him a magnum before disappearing into the trees. Fights break out at the Cornucopia where Taaj kills old Count Dracula before he could do anything. The murder, witnessed by Quibbles inspires the pony to run away to save his energy for another day.

Meanwhile, Weapon XI determines the optimal course for his survival in the games, and shall commit to that as Mr. Regular - not giving a fuck - smokes a blunt with Snoop Dog/Lion and watches nature documentaries.



Meanwhile, /MLP/'s Divegrass team plans a summer album. I can only imagine it'll play off like this piece of trash.



The day continues with the murder of Azarthes at the hands of Hunter S. Thompson, who probably fueled by acid and either managed to convince Azarthes to not kill him, only for Gonzo to kill him himself.

Meanwhile, the Sarlac Pit waves at everyone.

At /MLP/'s run in the games ends like their first game in the 2016 Summer Cup: a disaster. But at least they take Atilla with him. Vilage falls into depression when he finds Back to School supplies, a reminder that summer is not permanent.

And so as William S. Burrough, Quibbles, Doivid, and Hitler raid the camp of the American Flag, Harambe blows me up.

Katy Perry finds a handgun in a truck, and Weapon XI's ultimate plan leads him to loot Andrew WK's picnic. Where was your magnum, Andrew?

The Boys of Summer strangle Mr. Regular, ending his career of car reviews as an entire Carolinian fort takes Malinda, Kanye, and Broby on a road-trip to a town in northern Michigan.



And Day 1 ends here.

[Vilageidiotx]

>Vilageidiotx retrieves a magnum from the cornocopia

And I don't mean the handgun, ladies. ;)

>The American-Flag plans a roadtrip that goes hilariously wrong.

#ManifestDestiny

[Dinh AaronMk]

>The American-Flag plans a roadtrip that goes hilariously wrong.

#ManifestDestiny

@Vilageidiotx

[Dinh AaronMk]

Today we roll out with... broken events. I think I know what went wrong but it's too late to fix them. As it was at the time too, I said "fuck it" and continued. So what we have in the end is a lot of crazy.

Speaking of, Kebab Man starts waving at everyone. But since it's the middle of the night no one cares. He may be crazy, but at least he's not overcome with the insanity of inspiration that has caught Andrew WK, who decided to set aside his stupid tough-guy image to draft sweeing economic reforms to probably push on congress when they're not on summer vacation (whenever that ends).

Meanwhile, inspired by her trip to Gaylord, Michigan: Malinda May decides to go on a quest to build a whole new nation. Why? Who knows. Maybe she was just inspired by the charms of small town Michigan.

Weapon XI continues his optimal strategy. Hasn't done much so far: but that may be the point. If he can be low-key no one will notice. He could be our first pacifist winner!

Speaking of Pacifism, Taaj's dog spends the night high on heroin and in the stoned daze kills the nefarious Various.

And as Vilage and hundreds - or thousands - of others break into song, Hitler sleeps in a Porsche Cayman trunk, and several people sleep in shifts no doubt uneasy by the chorus of song from the Union lines.



I wonder if the American Flag can hear them in its nightly madness.



Stephen Hawking goes in search of water as Wade Wilson goes to New Mexico to go off-roading in the desert. Excuse the odd space, I did not give a fuck and my space-bar is fucky.

Malinda May goes to Florida to lift at Muscle Beach, she probably meets ClocktowerEchoes there too and I can only imagine they competitively lifted weights while staring at each other. No doubt listening to German marching tunes that Hitler may have left there.



I can lift to this.

Meanwhile, an entire baseball team offers itself on the alter of sacrifice to a guerilla who obliges with reluctance. A butt camouflages itself nearby.

But while he may not be practicing arm day at Muscle Beach, Hitler at the least flexes his brain muscles in internet RP and gets to work composing terribly long RP posts to dump on everyone and everything. It'll be his final solution! Or so he says when he works up the effort to actually DO anything.

Meanwhile, weed is recieved. Vilage looks at dank memes on KYM. Horse wife gets a bomb from ISIS and Weapon XI moves to the next stage of his master plan: making a fresh spear so he gets the repair quality edge of everyone else.



Only two people died.

[Wade Wilson]

Nice to see me getting along with people. :D And I've always wanted to go to New Mexico. Sweet.

[Vilageidiotx]

(Player2) is taking a beating.

[Dinh AaronMk]

RIP (Player2).



The night begins as Kebab Seller finds a cave full of craft beer. However he's not alone in its discovery an d has to fight off Summer Smith and the American flag. His meat-slicing ways prove to be a formidable match for the two, and they're forced to retreat to avoid further injury. Kebab seller wins a cave full of beer.

Fort Sumter sees fire in the distance, but it's questionable if that's the fire Aquaman set on Katty Perry with a molotov, or the fire of revolution that burns with Hunter S. Thompson and the mysterious Player 2. If revolution were to spring up this summer, what side is Fort Sumter on?

Likely still reeling from last night's heroin daze, Taaj's Dog seeks medical attention at the wings of the Cocoa Puffs mascot. Maybe a brighter, cleaner future is in store for her? Whichever the case: Vilage curls up in a box like a cat and finds a comfy, snug fit.

Wade Wilson cries himself to sleep, sad he does not have any love nor a comfy cardboard box. But at least he isn't Andrew WK who finds a cave full of cheap shitty beer.



Day begins with baseball, and the surprise deaths of an entire garrison of a fort at the hand of one man as Knight Shade takes Fort sumter off guard and kills everyone inside. If that didn't count for one death, Knight would for sure be this games biggest killer!

Hunter S. Thompson better be careful with killers like that on the loose. For being as untanned as he is, he can be seen clear to Gondor. Let's pray Knight Shade doesn't notice or care, or our newest, most blood-thirsty killer may go out to look for him. Or maybe single-person targets aren't his thing? After the grizzly murder of Fort Sumter's garrison, carpet bombing may be more Knight Shade's thing. Still, Hunter's complexion begs this to be posted:



Though, maybe there's still a chance for someone to out-murder Knight Shade in these games. Kanye West, not wanting to be outdone in anything kill two in one go. Slaying Doivid and the Cocoa Puffs bird in one go.

Quibbles contracts Zika. This may be a death sentence. Or maybe it doesn't mean anything.

Klairre and the American Flag though retreat from the day's violence to play their respective video games. So that's something, I guess. But they won't find any Dorritos or Mountain Dew there!

And Kebab seller kills Taaj as Brownie Bun is implied.



The glorious dead.

[Scout]

Well, if we have Hitler, then we have to have President Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin in on this too.

But it seems he's too late to the party - missed the entry times. Poor Putin. Now he's going to take it out on Ukraine. Good job, guys!

[Wade Wilson]

*cries*
i died so young
i didn't even get to meet halsey

[Dinh AaronMk]

The long march continues.

Confrontation is a part of the night with Hunter S. Thompson showing Andrew WK up by finding a cave full of craft beer. However Hitler proves the strongest in the following contest and beats all comers, forcing them from his party cave and into the deepest night. The father of Gonzo Journalism will sleep cold, alone, and sober tonight. Maybe he could seek out Andrew and share his Coors at the least?

VilageidiotX and the 343rd Airgroup get to buisiness and begin writing fiscal reforms. For what and to who: who knows. Maybe Cognress will take up their cause as well as following their pleas to declare war on Canada if they survive?



Weapon XI's plan seems to involve killing as few people as possible. Maybe this to save energy? Whatever it may be, it won't be doing him any favors in the kill-count category. Not with people like Knight Shade lurking the woods with aqua-based weaponry. Or Stephen Hawking for that matter, who kills VilageidiotX with a knife.



RIP in Pepperoni.

Taaj's dog is murdered by Hitler as well. I guess the dog just wasn't Aryan enough for him. All the same, the previous song applies in that emotionally cliche way in all the animal shelter commercials. I request Taaj make a mock commercial starring her dog in that vein now.

Kanye West kills American Symbolism with a trident, assuming the position of Most American Thing in the games for slaying the American Flag and absorbing his essence. All the while Kebab Seller dies of hypothermia with nothing amazing to his name as well as William S. Burroughs.

Brownie Bun meanwhile sun tans so long and dangerously she cooks herself through. Rest in peace, loving wife, scientist, and silly horse.



ded

[TupperWare Bowl]

now its getting interesting eh boys