Post Some Things About Your Country Here!

[Hostile]

I just want to know some things about your country.

Singapore: What would happen to you if you

Litter? We'll fine you.
Piss in the lift? We'll fine you.
Drink after 10 P.M.? We'll fine you.
Exceed the speed limit? We'll fine you.
Feed the birds? We'll fine you.
Dump rubbish on the streets?
Fish illegally from the canals? We'll fine you.
Bring durians onto the MRT? We'll fine you.
Chew gum in public? We'll fine you.
Spit on the ground? We'll fine you.
Vandalise something? We'll fine you.
Browse porn on the internet? We'll fine you.
Have drugs on your person? We'll fucking kill you.

Other than that, it's a great place for holidaying. You should come here some time!

[Dion]

What would happen in the Netherlands

Singapore: What would happen to you if you

Litter? We'll fine you.
Piss in the lift? If you get caught we'll fine you. Judging from smelly elevators, nobody ever gets caught.
Drink after 10 P.M.? SHIET we might join you.
Exceed the speed limit? We'll fine you.
Feed the birds? Nothing.
Dump rubbish on the streets? Muh environment.
Fish illegally from the canals? We'll fine you.
Bring durians onto the MRT? The fuck is a durian
Chew gum in public? Might ask you for a piece of gum too.
Spit on the ground? Nothing.
Vandalise something? We'll fine you.
Browse porn on the internet? Send me the links, I wanna see too.
Have drugs on your person? This is the Netherlands, boiiii.

We also eat chocolate on bread in the form of chocolate sprinkes.

Hagelslag

And shiet, nobody here wears clogs, windmills are inoperable and you don't see a lot of them in the tourist-y places, most people here don't use drugs (but most have smoked weed once in their life) and yes the Red Light Districts are readily accessible by all.

[Cyndyr]

What would happen in the United States

America - What would happen to you if you:

Litter? They say they'll fine you, but it's never happened as far as I know.
Piss in the lift? What.
Drink after 10 P.M.? That's probably the best time to drink!
Exceed the speed limit? You'll get a ticket.
Feed the birds? Most people don't care unless it's rice or Pepto Bismal.
Dump rubbish on the streets? Isn't this the same act as littering?
Fish illegally from the canals? Probably happens all the time.
Bring durians onto the MRT? ???
Chew gum in public? Absolutely nothing will happen.
Spit on the ground? People will think you're gross.
Vandalise something? Probably a slap on the wrist and nothing more.
Browse porn on the internet? Nothing will happen to you.
Have drugs on your person? Jail sentence.

[ArenaSnow]

My 'Murica

Litter? Nothing happens and some poor sod is stuck with picking it up at some point. Or it all comes to my driveway and I fruitlessly wave a shotgun around for a couple minutes. Cops go "meh..."
Piss in the lift? Caught, probably get kicked into the lift on a bad day. Not? Heh...
Drink after 10 P.M.? Load up in a car and go along I5. At least, that's what usually happens. It's my explanation for shit traffic around here.
Exceed the speed limit? Nothing happens until you pass the 10+ mark, in which case cops go a zoo'min. Now, in my town, 2 above-WEEEOOOWEEEOOWEEEOOO... Go 28 in a 25 trap zone here, you're done in.
Feed the birds? Get pooped on. Or rather, get my car pooped on when I return to it.
Dump rubbish on the streets? See first bit.
Fish illegally from the canals? Passed up for the sods dumping garbage into them on a daily basis... unless it's in my town, where there's more or less a fine for everything when the cops come about. Rare as they are these days. Given the national condition I can't blame them.
Bring durians onto the MRT? Get stared at very oddly.
Chew gum in public? Be asked by a half dozen people for a piece while the rest of the crowd chews in sync.
Spit on the ground? Solidify your status as a runner. Anyone who runs around here spits, just the way it goes.
Vandalise something? Wait 5 years for someone to notice and then be sent a ticket by my local friendly cops.
Browse porn on the internet? Feed NSA agent's offtime entertainment.
Have drugs on your person? Flip a coin to be caught or not. If so, see a few points above or in rare cases see the other bits regarding cops.

In short, either nothing happens, nobody cares, they join in, or you're the unlucky bastard who is caught by local police for speeding that make more than doctors on a good day.

[Crayt]

Glorious Sweden (Ärorika Sverige)

Litter? We're supposed to fine you.
Piss in the lift? We're supposed to arrest you and fine you.
Drink after 10 P.M.? Go ahead.
Exceed the speed limit? We'll definitely find you... and fine you.
Feed the birds? No one feeds birds anymore, don't be silly.
Dump rubbish on the streets? We're still supposed to fine you.
Fish illegally from the canals? I don't know.
Bring durians onto the MRT? Those look delicious.
Chew gum in public? Chew quietly.
Spit on the ground? That's a lil' nasty.
Vandalise something? We'll arrest you. And fine you.
Browse porn on the internet? Top ten searched for porn in Sweden includes some very standard things.
Have drugs on your person? Oh, you're getting arrested.

Random fact: It's a tradition to eat fermented herring, called surströmming in Swedish, during Midsummer celebrations.

[tsukune]

I think it'd be more amusing to share some of the exclusive laws each country has. Because things like "durian on MRT" is only exclusive to Singapore, so people of other nations might not get the dark humor behind that law.

(Yes I've lived in Singapore for over a decade to know that this is a "fine" place where you get fined for every little thing. Also, the slang here is terrible dissonance of every language and dialect that existed here meshed together to get your point across in the hubbub of a coffee shop. XD)

[Keyguyperson]

North Carolina specific, because there are enough Americans that are gonna post here and I figure I might as well give you a glimpse into a specific state. Because I'm personally a North Carolinian nationalist and believe we should retake our original colonial lands, which extend from northern Florida to Virginia, and all the way across to the Pacific ocean. All hail emperor Pat McCrory.

Litter? Fine
Piss in the lift? Get sent to court for indecent exposure.
Drink after 10 P.M.? The cops might ask if you could spot them some money for their own drinks.
Exceed the speed limit? Fine.
Feed the birds? If you live in a rural area you might literally have something to throw food in for the sole purpose of feeding wild birds.
Dump rubbish on the streets? Fine.
Fish illegally from the canals? We don't have canals. And our rivers are tiny. Seriously. In other parts of the world they'd probably be though of as creeks. You can barely move a canoe down the one I live near.
Bring durians onto the MRT? Neither of those exist here. Obviously. The MRT doesn't extend across the ocean and coast-to-coast into NC.
Chew gum in public? You're gonna stick it on something and I'm going to be slightly annoyed.
Spit on the ground? You make it clear to everyone else that you aren't a Yankee.
Vandalise something? You'll either get nothing, or be locked up for thirty years in a maximum security prison. It depends.
Browse porn on the internet? Emperor Pat McCrory the all-knowing will be disappointed.
Have drugs on your person? Depends. Are you rich? Rehab. Poor? Hope you didn't want to live the bit of your life from 25 to 50.
Sing off-key? FUCKING SWAT TEAM THROUGH YOUR GODDAMNED DOOR, YOU DISGUSTING CRIMINAL! YOUR HORRID NOISES DISPLEASE THE EMPEROR!
Dislike BBQ? Eternally shunned from all social circles.
Like UNC or Duke? Eternally shunned from 50% of social circles.

Random fact: We're infinitely better than South Carolina. The first plane was flown here and we let free blacks vote in the 1700's. What's South Carolina's claim to fame? Myrtle fucking Beach.

[Khat]

In the Glorious Country of England!

Litter? We'll fine you.
Piss in the lift? We'll arrest you.
Drink after 10 P.M.? Go ahead, but don't be a nob head.
Exceed the speed limit? We'll fine you.
Feed the birds? Go ahead so long as its not rice.
Dump rubbish on the streets? We'll arrest you.
Fish illegally from the canals? We'll fine you.
Chew gum in public? Will ask you for gum
Spit on the ground? Its not illegal. Gross, but not illegal.
Vandalise something? We'll arrest you
Browse porn on the internet? Go ahead so long as its not related to animals or children.
Have drugs on your person? Depends how much you have on you. Enough just for you, a fine. Enough for dealing? Arrest.

It also rains all the time here. People generally don't give a shit about the environment, as there is a lot of illegal tipping on country roads. Also, don't kill swans. It's very very illegal. They are protected by the Queen. :|

[Nanashi Ninanai]

@Buddha

Wait shit, so that habit of ours of eating chocolate on bread like that comes from your people. That's pretty surprising.

Litter? Who cares lol
Piss in the lift? Nobody really attempts it but mostly you'll get yells unless it's on something like a mall and you'd probably get fined.
Drink after 10 P.M.? Drinking is very restricted here anyway, you'd definitely going to get into trouble.
Exceed the speed limit? Can't go past the speed limit in a traffic jam
Feed the birds? No one cares.
Dump rubbish on the streets? If anyone cares our cities would be a lot cleaner since ages ago.
Fish illegally from the canals? Only fishes remaining on these "canals" would be something feeding on trash and toxin anyway so no one cares.
Bring durians onto the MRT? Still waiting for that MRT, mister governor.
Chew gum in public? Happens all the time
Spit on the ground? Everyone does it.
Vandalise something? We'll cover your mess with something else that you'll cover again with your mess later anyway.
Browse porn on the internet? Everyone does it but no one will admit to it.
Have drugs on your person? Pray you're not a foreigner.

Indonesians really are way too lax.

[Dion]

@Nanashi Ninanai We ran Indonesia, after all.

[Vor]

Ah, my homeland Bulgaria, the list of great things about it as about as long as the list of horrible things, which is to say a lot.

Litter? Nobody cares, unless its private property then you may get beat up.
Piss in the lift? Nobody cares as long as you don't get caught, if you do then you may get beat up.
Drink after 10 P.M.? Everyone else will already be on their 2nd or 3rd drink.
Exceed the speed limit? Nobody cares, as long as you don't forget to tip the police.
Feed the birds? People actually feed the birds regularly here, it's cool.
Dump rubbish on the streets? People will tell you that you're an asshole, then they'll toss their cigarette butt 100 meters down the street.
Fish illegally from the canals? Dear God, if you fish from the city canals, a fine is the last thing you'll need to worry about.
Bring durians onto the MRT? People will envy you for having money to buy such an exotic fruit.
Chew gum in public? Nobody cares.
Spit on the ground? Nobody cares, save for a disappointed old lady that will remark how youth in socialist times used to have better manners.
Vandalise something? Nobody cares as long as you don't get caught, if you do then you may get beat up.
Browse porn on the internet? You'll browse it lightning-fast, cause we've got some of the best internet in Europe.
Have drugs on your person? A shady guy will ask you to spot them some, but don't accept cause it's probably an undercover cop.

But nah, Bulgaria is a cool place to visit if you're a tourist from a richer country. Prices are really cheap compared to other more popular destinations and there's plenty of clubs/museums/mountains/stuff to visit. Just don't act tough around older, portly guys - they've all been in the army and will fuck you up. We also love Germans and if something is "Made in Germany" that's the equivalent of dwarven-forged Mithril for us.

[Hostile]

Oh, shit. Why is everyone posting about what would happen if they did any of the things listed in their country? I meant tell me some random facts about your own country, not what would happen if you did any of the above.

[Crimmy]

Australians invented the Hills Hoist.