Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

[Harlequ]

Granted, you are now freezing.

I wish I had a cute dog.

[Quote5]

Your wish is granted. Your dog pees. On everything.

I wish I could concentrate on what I want to concentrate on.

[The Nexerus]

Granted. Your mind is permanently locked into focusing on the one thing you most want to focus on right now, as you are reading this post. You will never be able to think about anything else.

I wish I was a better person.

[Briza]

Granted! But, now you have an addiction to betting at the race tracks with the rest of the betters. On the uppity-uppity, your hats are dapper-dan worthy. Hooray!

I wish to have a better relationship with the Roman Alphabet.

[Luna_Maria]

Granted. You can only spell BRIZA for now and for eternity.
I wish I could slaughter a lot of puppies and eat them for lunch.

[The Nexerus]

I refuse to grant that. That's too mean.

I wish people made kinder wishes.

[Quote5]

Your wish is granted. Didn't say how much kinder, though.

I wish I could slaughter a lot of puppies. Not going to eat them though, that would break The Nexurus's wish tahtI granted.

[Harlequ]

Wish not granted, you can’t kill the puppies.

I wish people stopped it with the puppy murders.

[Quote5]

Your wish is granted. Now its kittens instead.

...Hold on, I don't like that either!
I wish I didn't grant that wish like that!

[Harlequ]

Granted, you wished for it to be silverfish (thank goodness for that).

I wish autumn was longer. Waay longer.

[Quote5]

Your wish is granted. We now how 1 day of winter, 1 day of spring, and 1 day of summer. The rest is autumn. There will be a lot of dead leaves.

I wish I didn't have writer's block.

[Harlequ]

Granted, now you have writer’s brick, a condition much worse thaan simply writer’s block.

I wish for a clock to tell me the time.

[Foster]

Granted, it screams what time it is at you, every minute... sleep hase become impossible.

I wish my alarm-clock would actually work properly for once this week... so far I've been waking up on-time out of habit only.

[Quote5]

Your wish is granted. However, you stop waking up out of habit, and sleep through your alarm.

I wish for this headache I got while typing this in to go away.

[Foster]

Granted... you may want to turn out the lights and read the "ban the person above you" thread right about now...

Kinda wishing there was a day where everybody was meta.

[Winter Star12]

Granted but only Fortnite players would be more meta.

Wish I could temporarily even for an hour not feel feelings.

[Foster]

Granted, you have no feelings on what should have been the happiest day of your life.

Kinda wishing there'd be a reversed-polarity hurricane that fixes things hurricanes do.

[Quote5]

Your "kinda" wish was granted. The reverse-hurricane "Kinda" reverses the damage. You should have been more confident in your wish.

I wish to be a good GM.

[Harlequ]

Granted, you get a shot of extra confidence, making you believe most things you do (including GMing) are good, even when they aren’t

I wish for the next poster to have eternal happiness.

[The Nexerus]

Wish granted. Unfortunately, I lost it somewhere. Oh well.

I wish for Spam to finally be put out of its misery.