Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Syben
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Syben Digital Ghost

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Frozen your character is pretty intriguing. I'll read the rest later but I skimmed the powers and it seems pretty... reasonable. Two thumbs up in my personal opinion.



116... 118... whatever I was close enough.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by DragonBeastMode
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Aeonumbra said
Since GM is on vacation, I'm going to throw in my two cents for Princess Fuego Pantalones. First of all, somebody has been watching way to much paranormal activity, but that's just me being an elitist I guess.I actually just have a couple questions, maybe to clear it up just for my own personal benefit.#1: Is she a demon? It's not specifically stated what she shifts into, My money is on Demon.#2: Magic comes back to the world January 1st, 2016 (Ignoring the Bruja and her mystical sense to know that in 18 years Princess fuego would become devil incarnate) The Roleplay begins exactly one month afterwards, February 1st, 2016. -- So this means in the span of a month she... Burned down a highschool, Murdered a nurse, and escaped Texas while avoiding the entirety of the media and the police force, and somehow supports herself in New York #3: Her powers include.. (quote) "..she felt that she was stronger and faster.." , Anything Fire (I'm assuming already present physical flames, like a camp fire) Pyrokinesis, which is the ability to will fire into existence, Fire bending (The ability to bend the fire to your will, despite willing it into existence anyways through pyrokinesis.), etc (??). Use fire to heal her wounds (does she absorb it like some sort of elemental?) and cure herself of illness. (It's a pretty epic skill alone to control fire on the atomic level and destroy multiple cells of bacteria, virus, etc)Synopsis: It feels like you watched Paranormal V: The Marked Ones, and thought up a neat idea for a character, then proceeded to smash through and rush the biography leaving it meatless, and chalked full of amusing errors. ("..She wants to find them old".. is my favorite) Then thought of the best way for your character to outshine and surpass everybody else because she can control fire, will it into existence, heal wounds and illness, so basically when she bursts into fire she's invulnerable. Advice: Re-write it, Elaborate on Key-points, read some others for positive reinforcement.Admittedly I tend to rush as well, but not development wise. I type around 116 words per second, I make mistakes too and I don't catch them, but it's the detail and effort you put into it that makes it good.*****The above points are personal opinion and in no way, shape, or form represent the collective views of other members, or the GM himself*****P.S:: There are way too many pictures in your signature. If you haven't noticed, most people tend to use one.


I fixed most of the stuff, and my bio does not have to have a whole bunch of stuff in it, the rp is about what is happening now not what happen before everything, my bio is ok. and I think I can use how many pictures I want to use, that doesn't have nothing to do with the rp. and the GM hasn't complain about it.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Draconilian
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Draconilian Call me Kali

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Silver is acceptable with the changes, though you should think about how to get her to the conflict

Alexander is just fine.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
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Pardon me for being intrusive, but how is Silver accepted?

Her mother burns to ashes upon giving birth (I just checked, that part is still there), and that wouldn't be possible given the fact that Magic only returned in 2016. There is also no reason for that "Witch" to know anything, and we know that she didn't possess magic. Not to mention her ability to destroy a disease with heat alone would take an insane degree of control, something which I doubt even an Other wouldn't have after only a month. Not to mention that it would boil her own blood and kill her. Being resistant/immune to fire on the outside of her body is reasonable because there's something that would protect her, but inside her body she should boil herself alive if she tried to remove a disease with heat.

Going by Thermodynamics, even if she can control her ability to such a fine degree as to make it possible, the heat would still spread and affect her body when trying to cure herself from a disease.

As for you, DragonBeast. A Background is as important as what will happen in the RP. The reason for that is because the Background is what defines your character; it's what explains who your character is, what they do and why they do it. Lily Strider (my character) is a kind person with little hate or anger in her because she lived a rather peaceful life. She's a product of her early life, and that is how I will play her. Your background should be the foundation of your character, and if someone asks why your character did something, you should be able to point to your Background and tell them, based on that, why she acted as she did.

If I offended anyone, I apologise. I only try to help a bit, although that help may come in the form of a comment such as this.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Draconilian
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Draconilian Call me Kali

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I missed the burn to death part, maybe I should read less when I haven't slept. Excuse me while I re-evaluate everything
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Syben
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I agree with Kapuchu completely, what he/she stated was well said and saved me some breath. Someone who does not care about the creation and background of their character should not be in advanced.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by DragonBeastMode
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You know what I'm out of this shit forget it I tryed to be in a rp that I thought was going to be fun but forget I hope your rp last long Draco see u around.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Draconilian
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Draconilian Call me Kali

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Can someone give me a translation to english? I am very much half dead right now and trying to make this happen before I have to get busy again.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Sharnid
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@Draco I don't think they're interested anymore.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Syben
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@Draco :: Instead of putting in some effort, they did what bunny did and QQ'd their way out in a pity party of wallowing sadness.

@Draco English Version: They quit because they couldn't handle it

Also, he was a drifter from the casual side of roleplaying. Found himself in the wrong neighborhood I guess.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by FrozenEcstasy
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FrozenEcstasy The Wayfaring Killjoy

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Alex is ok. That's all I care about.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Syben
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I for one, like your character Frozen.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by ReaptheMusic
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ReaptheMusic Of a Certain Grim Reaper Aesthetic

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Name: Aviana "Avi" L'trite

Age: Indeterminate (Appears 19)

Sex: Female

Alternative Form:


Human Apperance:

Alternative Appearance:

Biography: Born in the sandy regions of Egypt, Aviana's strange appearance was said to be a blessing from the Gods. Born pale with red hair was truly an anomaly, and her large family praised the gods in thanks for said blessing received unto Aviana. She grew into a mysterious beauty over time, no one around her possessing the same fire-red hair as she. Being that she was considered of a noble bloodline and her family reflected as such, it was not long until she was placed into an arranged marriage abroad, to an Israeli noble.
Upon the month she was to meet him, however, her and her guards were ambushed by bandits. Many of her most trusted, befriended allies were slaughtered before her and they initially planned to hold Aviana for ransom against the L'trite family. Upon being forced down, however, Aviana began to panic... and nearly burst into flames. Frightened by this strange feat, the bandit whom had been holding her (and was severely burned by her heating body) shot her in the head. Convinced their job was done, they took what precious valuables Aviana and her group had on them and left. Aviana's rage however, would not be quelled. Her body turned to ash before twisting in the night air and reforming anew in a burst of hell fire.
She could see them leaving in the distance, in the midst of the cold desert night, and without even a second thought, her wrath spilled over the top... and turned her into a great phoenix. She cannot remember the rest, but Aviana tore after the bandits that night and made sure none of them escaped alive. The next thing she knew, she was home. It was late afternoon, and she lay naked on her luxurious bed with an all too clear memory of what had happened just after she had become a phoenix. She frantically came to her family and told them what she knew. Though most people of other cultures would have taken her to be crazy, they had always known Aviana was a blessed child and agreed to search for help or a response as to what exactly was going on.
Once they received word that there were others, and a flight was booked from Egypt to South America, Aviana avidly began practicing her magic and focusing all of her energy into becoming stronger. She felt she and the others would give birth to a new era. So help her, God.

Personality: Opinionated, Accustomed to luxury and holds disdain for the mundane, Ill-tempered, Polite, "Proper," A little vain, and overall very kind to others.

Views on the conflict: Wishes to take advantage of this brand new world, wishing to take upon herself the role of leader and press down against all those who oppose the shifters.

Magical Capability:
-Fire-
Gently breathing fire, holding it on her fingertips, holding it in orbs, etc. Very good when in need of light or cooking. Can also heat her body up to extreme temperatures
-Self-Resurrection-
Cut her down, she'll get right back up. It's a given, being a phoenix shape shifter. Submersion in water post-mortem however would truly kill her.
-Body Magic-
Enhanced agility, balance, sense, reflexes, and lung capacity. Typical of birds. It's also important to note that her bones are hollow to allow her the lightness to be able to fly when between phoenix and human form, and thus it's easier to break her bones.
-Healing Factors-
Her tears can heal wounds
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Sharnid
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Yeah, I'm ready to get this going! Excitement!

Oh and hey Reap! Glad you put one up!
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by ReaptheMusic
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ReaptheMusic Of a Certain Grim Reaper Aesthetic

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o3o hey spartan23, is that Emi from Katawa Shoujo on your icon?

Edit: It's been called to my attention that I've misinterpreted the span of the timeline. I'm still interested in the feedback and upon request I will adjust the character to fit the story; unless as she's acceptable as is
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by FrozenEcstasy
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FrozenEcstasy The Wayfaring Killjoy

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Reap your character does not fit the premise ._.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by ReaptheMusic
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Goodness, I'll get to work on fixing that then ^^ Good thing I have a back up plan~
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by FrozenEcstasy
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FrozenEcstasy The Wayfaring Killjoy

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Yes xD
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Sharnid
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I like it Reap!
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Syben
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Syben Digital Ghost

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I like the negatives you put in place to balance out her physical powers, I also like the fact that you used the phoenix lore regarding their tears. The only question I have is what is the limitation on her self-resurrection?
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