GAME: Crush A Wish

[AlteredTundra]

...Damn, talk about grim.

You granted your pickles. However, while they were cucumbers, they were put in a ghost chili brine, so now you are enjoying the hottest pickle ever.

I wish for the skills to shred on an electric guitar.

[Wade Wilson]

Granted. The genie makes a mistake and gives you a shredded electric guitar.

I wish to have all the money in the world.

[Fetzen]

Granted. However, as you are now in posession of all the money in the world, there's no money left for the economy. Some weeks later you realize that you can't eat money, but there's noone left who can make agriculture. You starve to death and your body is never to be found as it is buried under a rusting, rotting heap of... money.

I wish for being able to arbitrarily delay or antedate my need to sleep.

[Shorticus]

Granted, but the times at which your newfound ability works is totally arbitrary. You find yourself staying awake sleeplessly on nights when you wish you might sleep, only to get the sleep you need during the exam the next morning.

I wish for one ring to rule them all.

[nichinichisou]

Granted, but now everyone in the world is chasing after you. Once you die, they go after the new person with the ring and the world goes into complete chaos.

I wish for Bubbles.

[Fetzen]

Granted, you get bubbles. They spawn directly underneath you the next time you go swimming anywhere deep enough for you to drown if you loose buoyancy.

I wish for a clone of mine that behaves as I do but is totally obedient to me so I can stop him behaving like me whenever I want it.

[SleepingSilence]

Wish granted, I get a clone, it is the size of an atom. And you crush it by accident...(don't worry, you don't know how little the word human/living means anymore. Clone probably didn't have a soul anyway.)

I wish games and game consoles never crashed, or had errors of any kind...

[Wade Wilson]

Granted. Because they are so flawless, both videogame consoles and videogames themselves cost a fortune, with the RRP for something as old as the original Assassin's Creed selling for $1,000 at your local secondhand game store.

I wish for everything to remain perfectly normal.

[Shorticus]

Granted. Unfortunately, that means everyone is normalized. The world becomes bland and flavorless. All the streets are the same. The trees are all the same. The yards? The same. Everyone thinks the same and even looks the same. It makes everyone a weird conglomeration of phenotypes, like a sort of Asihispacaucafrislav. Also, everyone listens to the same awful ass pop music, but it's the norm, so whatevs.

I wish for the genie to explode and die.

[Melkor]

Granted. However, due to your close proximity to the genie, one of your arms and both of your legs are torn off from the blast. The rest of your body is covered in horrendous burn marks and you find yourself grabbing at the ground as you slide down a small hill into lava below as Obi Wan yells at you about how you were meant to join the Genie, not destroy them.

I wish for a really good, long lasting, RP.

[Shorticus]

Granted! You have a really good, long lasting roleplay... with yourself. Just you, yourself, and nobody else. But it's real good, I swear.

I wish for JAZZ HANDS.

[Kitty Pryde]

Granted but they will eventually fall off from so much fierceness.

I wish for the night to come first and then the day.

[SleepingSilence]

@Wade Wilson (Frankly that's stupidly accurate. *Smh at people selling old games for ridiculously prices on ebay.* >.>)

Wish granted, but to add further confusion the night has become 30 seconds, making it day almost 24/7. Which completely screws up the earth and its inhabitants incredibly.

I wish I could cure myself and give my migraines to other people that annoy me with no negative effect to my health.

[Shiny Keldeo]

Granted. Your migraines are now completely cured. However, as per your request, anyone who annoys you now get said migraines. You parents, your siblings, your friends, and also your enemies. You can't say they don't annoy you from time to time, can you? Now they are all too out of it to do anything with/to you, including chores, games, and anything else you liked to do with them.

I wish to be able to control the essence of life itself, including the ability to create new life from nothing, and use this power for the good of the world, helping to grow crops from desolate wastelands to feed millions, cure previously incurable diseases, and save billions of lives.

[Fetzen]

Granted. You totally fail to comprehend how your creations interact with and influence the complex ecological system on Earth and within weeks the only thing you do is to attempt repairing the damage you created, thereby just causing even more damage.

I wish to be the first who completes a true and correct theory of everything.

[Shorticus]

Granted. Nobody reads it.

I wish to be MASTER OF SCIENCE!

[AlteredTundra]

Granted. However, due to all of that knowledge being shoved into your brain, it explodes from it being overloaded, and you die.

I wish for the power of flight.

[Shorticus]

Granted. You are a mosquito.

I wish for the power of plot convenience!

[Shiny Keldeo]

Granted, you have plotted the path to the nearest convenience store.

I wish to be witnessed, for I am awaited in Valhalla!

[Duthguy]

Granted, from now on you're being watched for every single moment of your life.

I wish to be able to talk to fish