GAME: Crush A Wish

[Wade Wilson]

Granted. Little did you know, the controls are in Japanese, and the moment you attempt to do a slow fall you actually go at lightspeed and burst through the fabric of time and space. Now you, your family and your cow are dead.

I wish for time to stop indefinitely.

[Arkaquiavel]

Granted, the current timeline splits in two: one where you've been suddenly erased from existence and everything else continues normally, and another where you still exist, and everything else has been, in fact, stopped in time for you, not allowing any form of interaction.

I wish for an amusing space-time bending paradox where no one is removed from existence, injured or harmed.

[Vesuvius00]

granted. two timelines converge on each other, the one you were in and one where you had never existed in the first place. Now everyone else has a double and you are regarded as a strange but alright oddity in this new timeline.

I wish for sleep.

[Spambot]

Granted.


I wish for grapes.

[Witch Cat]

Granted, they're poisoned.

I wish for apples

[Arkaquiavel]

Granted, you receive the apples which were meant to be for Snow White: anyone who eats one single bit of them falls alseep for eternity.
The curse breaking condition still applies though, but you know what that implies.

I wish for a completely harmless, yet undestructable teddy fox.

[ArenaSnow]

Granted. It's shipped in a poison-lined package, and you die three hours after opening it. The teddy fox lives on.

I wish for a divine stroke of creative inspiration.

[Arkaquiavel]

Granted.

It was divine enough so you didn't die, and a lot of creative inspiration did come to you afterwards.

I wish for a huge pile of the tastiest cabbages.

[Gutshot]

You gain a bountiful amount of cabbages, but


I wish for a second wish, that of which cannot be crushed and thus incite a subsequent wish by someone else.

[Protoman]

Granted. You're dealing with a rules lawyer genie who makes each major component of a combination wish its own wish. Therefore, in his view, your first wish is for a second wish, which is granted. Your second wish is that the second wish cannot be crushed, which is granted only because it is self-contained. The third wish is that the second wish not incite a subsequent wish by someone else. That one has to be crushed because the thread must continue. You're just gonna have to be happy with two out of three.

I wish I had a ticket to attend an Arsenal FC match. I live State-side, so there's a rather large barrier to seeing them live.

[Vesuvius00]

Granted. You have the ticket and are all ready to go, but as soon as you leave your house you are knocked out by your stalker and later wake up in their basement with no idea how much time has passed. You've most likely missed the match and unfortunately tickets obtained through magic are non-refundable.

I wish for the opposite of the genie's next wish!

[Arkaquiavel]

Granted. Your health deteriorates drastically.

I wish for perfect health!

[ArenaSnow]

Granted. You die from your brain's contents being removed by an alien laser beam. and appear in a tavern for dead people. In eternal perfect health.

I wish for a pocket time dimension to squeeze more activities into a given day. 24 hours before, 144 hours after pocket dimensions a day.

[Vesuvius00]

granted. by going to these pocket dimensions you are able to drastically increase the time you have to do things in a day, but the more pocket dimensions you use, the more horrible things begin to happen to you and those you care about, which causes you to use more pocket dimensions to try and give those who are suffering more time to heal and recover, and eventually you open so many dimensions within dimensions that you can't find your way back and are permanently stuck in your current day, only able to add more dimensions in order to try and get more time before midnight to try and fix this, because if you're still in a pocket dimension once midnight hits, you are erased from all timelines.

I wish for a random superpower which has no ability to harm me or anyone else.

[Elgappa]

Granted! You random superpower is the ability to turn anything you touch, on will into gold! At first you become the richest Fire keeper in the world, and donate millions to charity! But then the whole economy of the world crumbles, as the gold you throw into it, leads to a super-inflation never seen again! You end up on the ruins of the modern world, and see a new world order, in which shrimps are the new backbone of a currency!

I wish for a kebab!

[Gutshot]

You're skewered between a pepper and a piece of pork.

I wish for good forum games.

[Arkaquiavel]

Granted, a lot of good forum games appear tomorrow, only to close themselves in the day after.

I wish for telepathic abilities I can use only when I want to.

[Vesuvius00]

Granted, but each time you use your abilities, there's no filter or limit to what you hear, and so the thoughts of all the people on Earth overwhelm and drown out whatever you'd been trying to hear.

I wish for a "reset" button that only I could use, and all it would do is restart the current day from midnight leaving only me with my memories of the last times I've gone through the day.

[IntPenDespSword]

Granted. The button's on the moon. By the time you afford space travel, if even so, the button is malfunctioning due to the cold and lack of an atmosphere.

I wish for a decently delicious sandwich, of such a standard that it could be sold in an average North American supermarket wherever they sell sandwiches, to be delivered directly to me as of time of posting.

[Asura]

Granted. You end up finding a razor blade two bites in, however, and severely cut your tongue. Damned Safeway.

I wish for the right to rule over all that is waifu.