Avatar of Fabricant451

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Recent Statuses

5 mos ago
Current Jenny Nicholson's four hour takedown of the failed Star Wars hotel is the most entertaining thing Disney Star Wars has provided in seven years
2 likes
5 mos ago
Train isn't a real band, it exists just to be played softly in clothing stores or the few malls that still exist in America. You can't convince me otherwise. RIP to the bassist though.
1 like
5 mos ago
Discord really did ruin everything, now people can't even air their grievances publicly like the good lord intended
7 likes
5 mos ago
Someone grab the lid before the worms escape the can.
4 likes
5 mos ago
The real status bar drama are the friends we made along the way.
5 likes

Bio

Look, I got lost on the way to getting some jajangmyeon and it'd be foolish to leave now.

Most Recent Posts

Yakuza: Like A Dragon has more effort put into its dumb go-kart minigame than some open world games put into their entire bloat design.
(Won't touch another Blizzard/Activision title myself. Regardless of quality.)


Fortunately their quality has been going off a cliff even BEFORE this lawsuit!
Finally been able to play it now that I have the means to do so on a good machine so I can safely say that Doom Eternal fucks.
Since the first one I guess is closed for inactivity, might as well bring it back because I have some hot takes that need to sizzle. So let's keep it civil and talk about video games as we so often do.

___

Alright so.

Maybe it's because I think the best one is 6 or maybe it's because I think the series should stop trying to run away from what it actually is but I thought Resident Evil Village was fucking trash. Okay that's a bit harsh, but it's a game that at every turn is full of baffling decisions and choices be it narratively or structurally or from an encounter and gameplay perspective. The game makes it seem like it's some kind of Metroidvania meets Souls-like in terms of progression, to the point where after the first part they literally mark your map with the remaining places you have to go to as if you'll be able to tackle them in any order you want. You know, like a video game. But in fact this is not the case as you're railroaded to take them out in a specific order because the game is actually super fucking linear to a fault.

The 'hub' area isn't even as open as it tricks you into thinking because they find new ways to block paths and make you go around or funnel around a specific path so even if you have the key that opens a door now you can't get to it until later anyway because oh no there's a truck in the way or whatever bullshit. And that sense of disappointment in the exploration is in every inch of the game. The first real 'area' tricks you into thinking it's some kind of exploration puzzle solving thing but it's not. There's only ever one way to go because doors are locked and it's hugely scripted and by the time you theoretically could explore everywhere, you already have anyway so there's no real point to go and find if you missed anything because chances are what you missed is shotgun ammo which is in high supply anyway because of the crafting and how the game shits ammo and materials to make ammo at you (because it's an action game lying about being survival horror).

The reason so much of the marketing seemed to focus on Tall Lady is because she's one of two characters that have anything resembling a personality, and no I don't mean personality with a wink and a nod. There are Five Antagonists and only two of them matter, largely because they're the only two that have genuine presence in the story and the areas they inhabit. As a game it feels like it wanted to recapture the lightning that Resident Evil 4 had when it came out and became a landmark title in the genre except the only part of RE4 it gets accurate is the fucking cheese.

The story is bad, even by RE standards, and thinking about it for more than a minute makes the whole thing fall apart. But there are parts where the game embraces the bullshit dumb parts of Resident Evil and it's in those moments where the game actually becomes enjoyable. Alas they are brief but I'll take brief moments of good where I can get them. The first person thing was a novel idea but I desperately hope they go back to third person for RE9; I also hope they stop trying to make it scary and just make it crazy but thye have to pretend I guess, but in a franchise where every enemy becomes a dumb goo monster and parasites give people superpowers and they give you big guns and plenty of ammo how can they keep acting like it's a survival horror game and not just an action game with horror elements. They even seem to realize this because the one part that most resembles what a survival horror game is they take away all your items and it's genuinely a highlight but also feels incredibly out of place with the rest of the game.

I really think Village is a bad game. But hey it's got hot evil people so that's all that matters.

So what've ya'll been playing in the hell that is our day to day existence?





I hope whoever designed the cairn stone activity in Assassin's Creed Valhalla never has a good night's sleep for the rest of their fucking life
Posting them here first before moving them to the characters tab just cuz





Five Dates is better than Late Shift in pretty much every way unless romcoms aren't your thing. The Complex was...fine too.
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