My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.
My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.
My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.
There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.
(Which is why if there's ever an Amalgam game made, I'm gonna shoot for Batman/Daredevil. Because goddammit, I will never let the idea of a Batman who has actual echolocation go.)
Amalgamations are a tricky one. Personally, I don't have as much of an issue if it's something like Green Lantern or Dr. Fate; when the powers are tied to an object, who's to say that a Marvel character wouldn't find it before a DC character or vice versa? But I always try to keep it in the realm of "which characters run in the same circles?" Carol Danvers is a perfect Lantern, IMO, because she's already so tied to space. Many of her allies and enemies transfer over. But something like Matt Murdock GL? It's trickier.
I can see the potential with Daredevil and GL based on the nature of his powers mixed with it's power. Part of what makes Kyle Rayner a great GL is because he has a grand visual mind, leading to amazing constructs. How does a blind man take that and make it a strength, especially when his senses largely rely on nothing that exists in the vacuum of space? It's a story that feels worth telling, despite the contrast.
But let's take another amalgamation: Batman and Iron Man. Both are rich orphans who use technology to fight crime. One is a deadly serious obsessive, the other is a good natured narcissist. And combined, it's... boring. You either get Batman in an iron suit or Iron Man with a bat motif and little else to really work with. Maybe a few fun rogues gallery mash-ups, but with Batman's trouncing Iron Man's, that just seems dumb after a certain point.
My point is, you've got to think of it thematically, too. You've got to value what stories can actually be told and be excited for them, otherwise it's just a gimmick.
<Snipped quote by Master Bruce> Gotcha. Can the backstory – in that Ollie and Dinah were on the Island together – remain unchanged, but the actual sheet only be a Green Arrow one, for the sake of my concept? It all kinda hinges on that premise.
That's fine with me. If the CW's Arrow can retroactively shoehorn a version of Black Canary into Ollie's island misadventures, you can get by with it without much incident.
WIP. Just have a sample left to write. I know that this technically breaches the one character rule, but given that these two's stories are so closely entwined, I hope that it isn't too big of one.
G R E E N A R R O W
A N D
B L A C K C A N A R Y
“Why, you speak treason!” “Fluently.” L A D Y M A R I A N & R O B I N H O O D
N A M E S
Oliver Jonas "Ollie" Queen Dinah Laurel Lance
A L I A S E S
Green Arrow Black Canary
P O W E R S A N D A B I L I T I E S
The Island has transformed Oliver. Put through a gauntlet of violence and death, he’s come out the other side with skills his younger self would never have dreamed of. Oliver’s an archer, and a damn good one at that. The desperation of a life spent surviving has instilled within him a philosophy of never missing, and that’s reflected in his markmanship – when he shoots an arrow, it meets its mark. His years away have seen him become a formidable combatant in peak physical condition; struggles on the Island were quick and brutal, and his style reflects that. Urban and environmental traversal were essential then, and they’re essential now – and his knowledge of Russian and Japanese don’t hurt, either. The thing he got really good at, though… really good at… was the art of killing.
But he tries not to think about that.
Dinah grew up as a semi-formed badass. Made to train in a variety of martial arts by her parents, she was already pretty good at boxing, taekwondo, krav maga and Brazilian jiu jitsu, among others – and the Island forced her to change that proficiency into mastery, far beyond Oliver’s capabilities... which should really, really scare you. Like Ollie, she’s in peak physical condition, and is even better on her feet than he is, moving through her environment with the grace of an acrobat. She’s as multilingual as he is, and has gotten quite good with a staff and sword. Probably the most noteworthy development, though, is her innate ability to emit a powerful sonic scream.
O R I G I N A N D B A C K S T O R Y
Oliver Jonas Queen was born to Robert and Moira Queen in Star City, California, in the year of 1990. His family was extremely wealthy, his father the founder and CEO of Queen Industries, a multi-billion dollar conglomerate with a strong foothold in the international technology market. Oliver wanted for naught, his every need provided for him, and then some. His view on life was that it was easy, and one only had to take a look at him to see it: he was lazy, arrogant, and ignorant of the struggles most other people faced. As a young teen, he took a brief interest in archery, and in typical Queen fashion, he was provided with the best instructor money could hire, taught privately at the Queen Family Mansion. This would last all of two years, Oliver’s focus shifting towards other, less disciplined hobbies. Together with his best friend, Tommy Merlyn, he barely scraped through boarding school, and after it was over, all they knew was booze and women.
Dinah Laurel Lance was born to Quentin Lawrence "Larry" Lance and Dinah Drake in Gotham City, New Jersey, in the year of 1990. Larry was a cop, and saw many of the horrors that life had to offer; armed with a rather cynical worldview, he made sure that his daughter grew up with the tools to take on any trouble she might face. Boxing, taekwondo, krav maga – he made her learn it all, so that she might not one day become another statistic in his reports. When the opportunity came for a transfer to safer pastures, Larry took it, and the family moved to Star City when Dinah was thirteen. She would discover her talent for singing in junior high, taking private lessons at school and performing in school shows when she wasn’t training or helping her mother at her florist shop. She met Oliver Queen when they were twenty-two. He was an idiot, and she was unlike any other girl he’d been with before: one with character. Somehow, they started dating.
Sick of his son’s frivolous ways, Robert decided to take Oliver with him on a business trip to Beijing for his twenty-third birthday. Travelling on Robert’s yacht, The Queen’s Gambit, he hoped to talk some sense into Oliver, if not to convince him to get his MBA and take a position in Queen Industries, then to try and get him to try out philanthropy for himself, or, well... anything. Oliver saw this as an opportunity for something else; with their relationship on shaky ground, he invited Dinah along in an attempt to stabilise it, envisioning a romantic few weeks on the water. It was around then that he realised he might finally be taking something seriously. Before any serious talks, Robert gave Oliver his birthday present – Howard Hill’s bow from The Adventures of Robin Hood – in an attempt to remind Oliver of the last time he truly had a passion for something. He would attempt to broach the subject of responsibility tomorrow. But before he could do so, the Gambit was swept in a freak storm, and as it sunk, Oliver watched his father die – left to drift in a lifeboat with Dinah. They arrived at shore days later, stranded in a place they would come to know only as "The Island." Back home, Dinah Lance, and Oliver and Robert Queen were presumed dead, buried in empty coffins.
Five years later, Oliver and Dinah returned home. Much had changed during the time they were gone, and for the next four months, they would try to adjust to civilised life once more, intending to leave the horrors of the Island behind. But life has a funny way of spitting in your face.
W H A T M A K E S T H I S C H A R A C T E R " U L T I M A T E " ?
The biggest differences, I think, are that a) Oliver and Dinah knew each other before they started dabbling in this superhero gig, b) they were on the Island together, and c) neither of them really wants to do anything with their abilities, and would really rather just try to adjust to normal life again. Obviously, this won’t work out for them, and before long we’ll see bad guys shot at with arrows, with their eardrums blown out. It’s just a matter of time.
A thing to note is that they aren’t the Oliver and Dinah from the comics yet. They’re both still dealing with their experiences on the Island, and neither will get over them for quite some time. But they are together, and in that same fashion, they’ll eventually move past their damage, and (hopefully) take their place among the greats.
S U P P O R T I N G C H A R A C T E R S
Thomas "Tommy" Merlyn – Oliver’s best friend since diapers, now climbing the ranks of his father’s company, Merlyn Global.
Thea Queen – Oliver’s little sister, twenty years old. Sole resident of the Queen Family Mansion after Moira Queen’s passing one year ago.
John Diggle – Thea’s bodyguard, formerly Moira’s before her death. Ex-S.H.I.E.L.D., and before that, ex-Green Beret.
Walter Steele – CEO of Queen Industries, handed control of the conglomerate by Moira Queen in the late stages of her cancer. An honest man, good to Thea. Like a substitute father.
Captain Quentin Lawrence "Larry" Lance – A captain at the S.C.P.D., and Dinah’s father.
Dinah Drake – Dinah’s mother. Owns the Sherwood Florist, a flower shop at Orchid Bay.
Sara Lance – Dinah’s little sister, twenty-one years old. Became close friends with Thea following their siblings' presumed death.
Roy Harper – ???
S A M P L E P O S T
I can approve you for Green Arrow once you have the sample done, but Dinah's gonna have to remain firmly in the supporting character status. Which means that in the same way I can't technically stop anyone from submitting an Oracle CS, I can at least say that she's vital to my stories and advise against the person trying to pick her up. You'd have to do the same, essentially.
And as far as Bounce's Green Lantern app goes...
As for whether or not to apply for a GL alongside Bounce, that is now his decision, since he represents the Corps in-game. PM him if you want to sling a ring.
I think I liked it for a limited series, but there was a lot of things that just didn’t sit right for me. Bruce’s deductive ability seemed to be downplayed for plot convenience, though I did like how the writer framed the “two Harley’s” concept from start to finish. I think it'd make a decent animated film adaption if it got the proper treatment.
I agree that Bruce's characterization was a bit weird, but I took that as him being unhinged for this particular story. Murphy really wanted to go for the idea of painting Batman as the villain in a Joker POV story, and sometimes that worked, sometimes... not so much. That's always a tough line to straddle, because on one hand, you have The Dark Knight Returns. And on the other hand, you have The Dark Knight Strikes Again.
The two Harleys thing was definitely an element I thoroughly enjoyed, just because I've been so sickened by the way Harley's been portrayed ever since The New 52 between either being an outright unrepentant murderer like Joker himself, or a self-aware loudmouth that wants to be Deadpool. Dini and Timm's Harley felt like an entirely separate character, by contrast, and I liked that Murphy built in an awareness of that.
@Master Bruce@Byrd Man@Morden Man Would writing for Deathstroke as a sort of True Neutral anti-hero character work for this roleplay? I've been replaying Arkham Origins (unfortunately on the inferior PC-port) and I'd like to eventually do some sort of similar setup to the 'multiple assassins hunt Batman over the course of a night' angle of that game, which works very well with a younger, new comer Batman.
If the intent is to start killing good guys, you might want to dial it back a little. At least at first. That's dangerously close to a PC villain if the stated intent is to hunt down a known superhero, even if my guy is a vigilante that the public fears. Maybe play around with Slade wanting to dabble in heroism a bit? There's certainly precedence for that with characters like Deadshot and Black Adam, who went down the path of the light for a brief spell.
Ah, yes. Thank you for reminding me that with the IC thread up, the 24 contesting period for apps is over.
Ultimate One Universe: Year One Application
Character You're Applying For: Dr. Stephen Strange
Powers And Abilities: Doctor Strange has been trained in the Mystic Arts, allowing him to channel and manipulate extra-dimensional energies to affect change in the physical realm. His connection to this energy allows him powers limited only by his imagination and his ability to harness them. Some common manifestations of his magic include: teleportation, illusion, levitation, energy blasts, telekinesis and matter manipulation. In addition to this, his studies in the mystic arts enable him to leave his physical form as an astral projection. In this form he is unbound by physical laws and is undetectable unless he chooses to be. Strange possesses a number of magical items and artifacts that provide him with further abilities. Chief among these possessions is the Amulet of Agamotto, a relic whose mysteries Strange has yet to decipher.
Origin And Backstory (In A Maximum Of Four Paragraphs): Doctor Strange's backstory remains largely unaltered. In his heyday, he was a talented neurosurgeon who was an authority in the field. Strange was fuelled by a desire to be successful and to gain recognition for his achievements - to him, his role as a healer was an after thought if anything; often he would turn down terminally ill patients to preserve his perfect record, and seek out the most high profile cases that might pad his reputation out further. He was arrogant, self-absorbed and unlikable. While driving one night on the way to an awards event, Strange lost control of his vehicle, flipping it and leaving him comatose for a week. When he came to, the damage was clear. The use of his hands had been all but lost, suffering extensive nerve damage as a result of his surgery. In a moment his life had been upended. Unable to continue his work and failed by western medicine, he turned to the mysticism of the east, upon hearing about a healer from a place called Kamar-Taj, hidden deep within the Himalayas.
Here he finds The Ancient One, the last of a secretive order of mystics, a being of immense age and wisdom. He agrees to train Strange in the mystic arts, something Strange is sceptical about at first. Over time, he learned to embrace the teachings. After five years of rigorous study and practice, Doctor Strange ranked as highly proficient in the ways of the mystic arts. The experience entirely reshaped his worldview - it left him stoic and humbled. He would have appeared a stranger to the man who had first journeyed to Kamar-Taj. The Ancient One soon began preparing Strange to inherit the title of Sorcerer Supreme when he eventually passed on. This did not materialise. An estranged student known only as Mordo arrived at Kamar-Taj, committed to killing his former master and to usurp him as Sorcerer Supreme. He was thwarted by the combined efforts of the two mystics. His second visit ended differently. This time he more than outmatched the ageing sorcerer and his apprentice.
<Snipped quote by Sample Post>
In a last act of desperation, Strange casts his soul bare to the multiverse and draws strength from Dormammu, the once towering ruler of the Dark Dimension. Embracing his dark magics, he redirects Mordo's supernatural assault and severs the Elder God's hold over him - Mordo is cast adrift, banished to the creature's own realm. The mentor had succumbed to a final attempt on his life. Strange followed the Ancient One's final instructions: return to New York - find the Sanctum Sanctorum and protect it with his life. He gets there and finds a box waiting for him, contains the mystical artifacts amassed by the sorcerer supreme during his own life. He transfixed over one item in particular, a golden amulet. At the time the roleplay begins, Strange has resided there for two weeks, and is trying to come to terms with his new role as a protector of Earth's dimension.
What Makes This Character 'Ultimate'?: For this Year One story I decided to start with Strange at a familiar point - the Ancient One is dead, and the title of Sorcerer Supreme lies unclaimed. He is not at the height of his power; at this point in his career he has only faced two otherworldly threats, only surviving in the first case thanks to the help of his mentor, and most recently by channelling the power of Dormammu, a force he does not truly understand. He is certainly not an authority on magic yet, or considered as such by his mystical peers, although he carries a certain level of prestige as an apprentice of the Ancient One. This gives me the opportunity to allow him to grow into his traditional role in real time, learning more about his powers as the RP goes on, with the help of Wong, his substitute instructor here, rather than his manservant.
I have decided to leech at least one idea from the the MCU interpretation of the character, with the Sanctum Sanctorum acting as one of many magical locations designed with the purpose of protecting against mystical threats to Earth. Ownership of the mystical brownstone found in Greenwich Village was passed to Strange after the Ancient One's demise. However, they are not all linked to Kamar-Taj and their masters may not take as kindly to Strange's influence as they did the Ancient One.
A clear divergent point here will be how he interacts with the spiritual characters that would otherwise inhabit the DC universe. Don't expect him to be channelling the power of Shazam right off the bat, but DC-based mystics and creatures will hopefully be able to pop up in my interpretation from time to time.
Supporting Characters: The Ancient One: Doctor Strange's former master and the last Sorcerer Supreme of Earth, the Ancient One lived for nearly half a millennium, keeping malevolent magical forces at bay for much of his life. Despite his age, when Strange came to know him he had the appearance of a man in his late fourties. Nearing the end of his life, he chose to make Stephen Strange his apprentice, shaping him into a man worthy of the honor in the process. He died at the hand of his former student, Mordo, all of his accumulated magical artifacts passing to Strange.
Wong: Before his death, the Ancient One foresaw its coming. Knowing that his apprentice had much left to learn before he would be ready to take on the mantle of Sorcerer Supreme, he entrusted to Strange the Mentor Stone. Containing the combined knowledge of Sorcerers Supreme of the past, for Strange it manifests in the image of Magister Wong, a magical construct patterned after one of the earliest Sorcerers of their order. In Wong, Strange finds a teacher and a companion.
Baron Mordo: A disgruntled former apprentice of the Ancient One, his desire for power and willingness to engage in the most sordid of magical practices led to his banishment from Kamar-Taj. Twice, he had attempted to exact revenge on the ageing Sorcerer, once having bridged the gap between the Dark Dimension and Earth to summon Dormammu. Despite his already faltering power, the Ancient One was able to seal the master of the Dark Dimension back away in his own realm, with the aid of Strange. The second time however, Mordo invoked the power of Shuma-Gorath, a God of Chaos, overwhelming his former master and ultimately destroying him. Strange, borrowing strength from Dormammu, was only able to sever the Elder God's ties to Earth's realm. In doing so, he also trapped Mordo in the tentacled entity's home dimension. His current status is unknown.
Shuma-Gorath: An Elder God who desires conquest of all the multiverse. In terms of raw power, he far outclasses Earth's other mystical threats.
Dormammu: The ruler of the dreaded Dark Dimension, Dormammu is a powerful being intent on expanding his influence to all realms. He is the kind of malevolent entity The Sorcerer Supreme is charged with combating. Strange has only caught glimpses of his realm thus far, a inhospitable wasteland populated by beings known as the Mindless Ones. Now that the Sorcerer Supreme of Earth is dead it is only a matter of time before Dormammu's gaze turns to Earth once more.
Nightmare: The Master of the Dream dimension. Not yet encountered by Strange.
Mephisto: A multidimensional being of immense power, Mephisto oversees a hellish realm of his own. He lives to torment others and enjoys entering into diabolical pacts with mortals.
The Vishanti: The Vishanti are a trio of God-like beings that serve as the supernatural patrons of Earth's sorcerer supreme, and protectors of the realm. They are known as Oshtur (the Omnipotent), Hoggoth (the Omnipresent) and Agamatto (the Omniscient). A sorcerer can invoke their name or names to channel energies to fuel their own magic, or imbue artifacts with their abilities. As of yet Strange has not communicated with these beings directly.
Other Prospective Characters (Character not from Strange-lore):
Boston Brand / Deadman: I love this character. A Brave and the Bold-type of adventure where Strange helps Brand piece together the details of his murder and see out his purpose as a marauding spirit is something I would very much like to write. However, I would understand if any of the other players of magically-inclined characters would want to lay claim to him. I am fully open to a work around for that, be it collaborative or on a time-share basis.
Cain and Abel: Further on I can see having a use for these characters. However, that is dependent entirely on whether they factor into anyone else's plans and can be substituted if required.
Others: There are other DC characters who due to their popularity I would entirely expect to be seized as player characters and in no way wish to reserve (such as Shazam, Etrigan/Jason Blood, The Spectre, Trigon, Raven etc.) They comprise a large chunk of the DC mystic universe that would be interesting to utilise, if only on a mention to mention basis.
This is one of my favourite designs for Dr. Strange, perhaps in any relating media, so it's criminal to me that this lost out to the hobo-monk costume worn by Cumberbatch in the Marvel Studios movies.
I'll bump the updated app onto the current page...
Character You're Applying For: Marc Spector - Moon Knight
Powers And Abilities: Ambiguous. Exceptional fighter, both hand to hand and with virtually any weapon. Some affinity for the moon, whether it’s present state has a psychological or supernatural effect on him remains unclear.
Origin And Backstory (In A Maximum Of Four Paragraphs):Marc Spector ran away from home to join the armed forces at the earliest possible age. The oldest of two children in a devout Jewish household in Chicago, he sought a new hierarchical structure that praised and rewarded his own talents; talents for violence that would otherwise be frowned upon in general society and certainly at home.
He qualified for the United States Marine Corps and quickly rose to Corporal as he was trusted implicitly by his fellow soldiers. After two tours he was given a token promotion to Sergeant as he was transferred from the DoD to work on special missions and duties under the CIA banner.
[CLASSIFIED]
--At which point in time this group was disbanded. All involved were given Other Than Honourable Discharges and summarily removed from National Service to their countries of origin. Spector remained in contact with Jean Paul DuChamp (FFL, Caporal Chef) and the specialist contact from his last mission Raoul Bushman however. Due to a lack of military opportunities as a result of the OTHD, the three moved into the private sector.
The three have been seen active in the Egyptian-Kahndaq region, around the Sinai Peninsula.
What Makes This Character 'Ultimate'?: Tying together damn near everything (except for one run that is incompatible) ...eventually.
This is going to put the microscope over Moon Knight’s past, deal with who or what he is presently, and delve into what kind of future that means he can have.
Supporting Characters: Jean Paul DuChamp, French Foreign Legion, Caporal Chef - JP DuChamp started his military career as a sniper, before later becoming one of the world’s foremost military pilots, able to pull off tough maneuvers in helicopters, light aircraft and virtually anything airborne. “Frenchie”, as Marc inarticulately would come to know him, became close friends with Spector when the pair worked on a clandestine team working dark missions. Possibly because Marc Spector seemed to have held the most of his humanity out of any in the group.
Raoul Bushman - Raoul Bushman was a ranking “Specialist” in Marc’s final mission with the CIA. He also leads his own band of mercenaries presently around Northern Africa/Sinai Peninsula.
More to come as I walk through the origin.
Character Picture:
Sample Post:
The desert sands rose and swirled as the bird lowered. What once looked like a single spinning object slowed until 4 rotor blades were visible, and the men jumped out.
Marc Spector. Ex-marine. Fighter. Violence given form,
“Miles from anywhere.” He grumbled, “What have you dragged me into now, Bushman?”
The mysterious man flashed a dark grin full of steel in response.
“That depends, Spector. If your friend dropped us off in the right place. Froggy, did you--”
Jean Paul DuChamp. Pilot. Sniper. Boundless patience.
“I asked you to stop calling me that… and yes. I set us down exactly where you said. The Alraune dig is just over 2 kilometres away, ov-air that dune.” The French pilot chomped down on a cigarette holder.
The heavyset man in command stormed forward leaving Spector and DuChamp to their own idle chatter.
“Really? A cigarette holder? Don’t you get tired of giving him stuff to rip on you about?”
“Marc, what you may consider, ehh… ‘rip-worth-ie’ my people would describe as a certain… je ne sais quoi.” The Frenchman held the cigarette holder betwen his teeth with a grin whilst straightening his pilot jacket, and presenting himself with a flourish gesture.
“Je ne sais quoi… Is that French for stereotypical?”
The pair approached the heavyset man who was standing at the top of the sand dune his gaze caught on the target in question.
Raoul Bushman. Mercenary. Sadist. Thoroughly Nasty Piece of Work.
“There it is, Spector. The vans will rendezvous here from the main pass back there in 3-4 hours. Meanwhile, we stake out the road between the dig and the city. Look for tendencies…”
Spector pulled a pair of binoculars. He could see a small archeological crew sifting through a cordoned off area of desert. A large number of locals doing gruntwork, and two notable westerners - an old man and a young blonde woman.
“You asked what we were doing here, Spector...” The mercenary leader growled. “We’re revenue raising...”
I didn't like it at first, but it really grew on me as an alternate reality story. I'd never want it to be canonized, but I appreciate the idea of a story that directly tackles Batman as a legitimate problem in Gotham while still keeping him as a vigilante instead of making him an outright supervillain or something. And I liked what was done with Napier, all things considered.
Very well, where do I begin?
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.
My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.
My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.
There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.
<div style="white-space:pre-wrap;">Very well, where do I begin? <br><br>My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. <br><br>My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. <br><br>My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. <br><br>There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.</div>