Avatar of NeoAJ

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Recent Statuses

2 yrs ago
Current Happy new year. Yes I am still alive. Bleep you 2022.
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3 yrs ago
You need to chill, girl. ;P
2 likes
4 yrs ago
I still don't know why I'm awake.
4 likes
4 yrs ago
I have no idea why the hell I am still awake right now. I blame my brother.
3 likes
4 yrs ago
Today, I have added "people who don't wear masks" onto my shitlist. Oh wait, I did that months ago...
6 likes

Bio

I'm a 32 year old woman just looking to keep those writing muscles in whatever shape I can. I'm also Canadian, so fill the rest of this bio with every stereotype you can think of. I've also been single for over a year now, so clearly I'm a catch.

"She's horrible and stuff" - @BangoSkank

Most Recent Posts



A Shawna @NeoAJ and Jack @Bee collab


“Yeah, your boy’s got a date to the dance tonight!” Jack said rather ceremoniously, staring at himself in the mirror as he made sure his suit looked as dapper as humanly possible. “I mean, it’s not much of a surprise, but this ain’t your ordinary pump and dump chick.” There was a pep in Jack’s step as he finished tightening his bowtie, turning around to face who was revealed to be Laura Goff, his sister.

Laura was currently home after expressing desire of her boredom with Massachusetts. Of course, she had to go back at some point, but she figured spending the week with her family wouldn’t be so bad, and it’d be a welcome break from a strenuous curriculum that she was facing up north.

Jack was delighted that his sister was back in town for once, but he had more pressing priorities tonight. This was a completely new situation for Jack, one that he hadn’t really been in before. Jack was known to be quite the playboy, at least in his mind, but being someone’s beard was a completely foreign situation to him. This was going to be interesting, to say the least.

“Didn’t you just say that she wasn’t actually your date date?” Laura replied, looking up from her phone to look at her kid brother. “Yeah, which is why this isn’t a pump and dump chick. Besides, for whatever stupid reason, they’re not letting us bring girlfriends or boyfriends or whatever. Strictly platonic, or so they say.” It was made very clear from the very beginning that this was purely for superficial reasons, which Laura was made very well aware of almost immediately after it happened.

“Besides, she’s got a girlfriend or whatever.” Jack shrugged, turning around to further adjust his hair in the mirror, “I don’t know what the hell is going on with those two, but it’s none of my business. Whatever makes them happy. She gets to maintain her cover, I get to have a date to a dance. Win-win, am I right?” Jack chuckled, before determining his appearance to be sharp enough to cut diamonds on.

“Anyway, how do I look? Great, right?” Jack smirked, before walking past his sister to grab his phone and wallet and stuff them in his pockets. “I feel bad for you. You’re gonna be stuck here and bored as hell while I’m gonna have fun with Shawna. Sucks to suck!” Jack teased, as Laura rolled her eyes. “I’m pretty sure you were going to ask me if this Shawna chick didn’t say yes.”

Jack stared at Laura for a moment.

“Please.” Jack scoffed, before he opened the door out of his room, “Don’t get too bored without me!” Jack said, as he stepped out of his room. His father, Frank Goff, had been generous enough to allow Jack to borrow his Dodge Viper for the night. Frank knew how quickly a cool car would make its way to a girl’s heart, which is why he had no qualms with giving Jack so much power.

As usual, Frank and Sydney were nowhere to be found as Jack stepped out. They probably had “appointments” at work or something like that. Not like Jack had much of a problem with it, that just meant he was able to get into the car without getting the schtick about seducing girls from his father and how he managed to “bag his mother”. Jack could just go straight to the car, and drive on from there.

It wasn’t long until Jack was on the road, and surprisingly enough, Shawna didn’t live too far from Jack. It was about a ten minute drive, even without some spirited driving on Jack’s side. For whatever reason, though, meeting Shawna’s parents was something that did strike a little fear into whatever Jack had called his heart. He didn’t pay much mind in meeting the pump and dump parents, wasn’t like he was ever going to see them again, but with Shawna’s parents, there was a lot more at stake. Shawna was a bit cooler than the pump and dump, and he didn’t want to let her down.

Soon enough, Jack arrived at Shawna’s house. It was a rather nice house at that, one that caused Jack to make a slightly longer gaze at it as he stepped up. Taking a deep breath, he walked up to the door, ringing the doorbell to announce that he was there.

Meanwhile, for the first time in a long time, Shawna Josi was pacing in her room.

Before it was a common occurrence. She would use it as a break from her studying sessions. Getting the blood flowing was supposed to help jump start the brain. One could almost make out a worn path in the carpet where she tried to reorganize her thoughts, where the red lightened to a pale, almost-pink hue. It hadn’t seen action in months, due to Shawna’s newfound laissez-faire attitude to life and her desire to spend most of her time either in a chair with a bag of Lays Poppables while watching Netflix, or, in recent times, out with one of her girl friends. Or her girl friend.

That wasn’t a clear option now though, and it’s why she was pacing. The higher-ups at the school had seen to that for now, and maybe that was a good thing. Things had been a little tense at home. She didn’t have it to herself anymore. Her parents officially returned from their world cruise two weeks earlier, and it was a Herculean effort on Shawna’s part to get the entire house cleansed and smelling more of Febreeze than of weed.

Sunshine did her part to help get it ready for the grand return. She helped scrub the counters, helped steam the carpets, helped take all the accumulated bottles to the depot. She didn’t have to do any of it, but the fact that she did was just in a drop in the bucket that was overflowing with the proof that Shawna needed to know she made the right choice in taking the leap she did.

And to protect that relationship, it’s why she coached her Valentine’s Day date the way she did.

In a way, things perfectly fell into place for Shawna. With Jack agreeing to be her date for the night, it gave her a natural cover to avoid telling the truth to her parents. Martin and Ramona didn’t need to know that the only reason she was going with the football star was because of some cockamamie rule against not taking paramours to the grand pink and white ball. Or that no man was going to be getting that honor. Ever. As far as she knew.

Besides, they were still coming off the high of their extravagant tour of the world. Shawna had to sit through two hours of them detailing their exploits. If she had to see one more photo of a pagoda in Yangon, she was going to explode. At least once the initial excitement subsided, they let her be. They let her retreat to her room, where they believed she was hard at work studying as opposed to texting her expanding social network.

Still, given what she now knew about herself, she wondered just how convincing she could actually be. It wasn’t like she had experience being the fawning girlfriend to begin with. In her parents’ eyes, Jack would be her first real date. All Shawna had to go off of were the crib notes taken from her months of binge watching sitcoms, and some gut feelings that she could only thank Sunshine for bringing out of her. It was going to be tough to channel all that into a performance that even Chrissie would have to applaud.

It was why she paced. It was why even in the brand-new dress that she had bought for such a date, even knowing that on the other side of that car ride, the girl she loved would be waiting, she paced. All this time building up to this moment. She hoped she didn’t crack under the pressure as she did before.

The doorbell rang.

As the door opened, Jack saw not his date but an imposing man standing in the entryway. The outfit didn’t exactly scream intimidation, with the blue and yellow Hawaiian shirt with the pansies all over it muting the effects somewhat. Still, as Martin Josi stood there staring at Jack, the salt-and-pepper hair freckling his temples and his beard, the steely gaze piercing through even the thickest of skins, the wrinkles on his face highlighting the experience gained over a lifetime of fighting through the engineering industry and a mind that knew exactly how to get away with murder, all focused on the boy who was expected to take his youngest daughter to her first Valentine’s Day dance.

Martin stood silent for a moment, appraising everything, then his chiseled jaw moved and he broke out a smile that was equal parts assuring and creepy. “So!” he started, voiced still tinged with a Germanic accent that his parents imprinted and Florida could never truly shake. “You must be Jack! The boy who is going to take my girl to the big dance! Wunderba! Come in! Come in! Get out of the cold!”

Nobody told Jack that Martin sounded like the most German man to ever grace the face of this planet. The accent was jarring and it took him by surprise. He almost stammered for once before Martin took him into the Josi household. He was right, it was kinda cold tonight. He figured he should duck into the household before he made any formalities.

“Thank you, Mr. Josi.” Jack said, getting into the house. He reached out his hand, offering it to Shawna’s father. He wanted to take care of that first before he started to look around for Shawna. After all, this man was teh reason why they were doing this in the first place. “I’m Jack Goff. Pleasure to meet you.”

Martin took Jack’s hand in a forceful shake, getting a few pumps in before letting go. “I am certain the pleasure is all mine!” he said as he led the football star through the lobby towards the kitchen/living room combo that was the hub for most of the activity in the house. “I must admit, Shawna has been sparse with the details about you, so I am eager to learn a thing or two about the young man who is leading my daughter out into the world!” The way he emphasized young man and daughter implied an understood relation between the two beings. One that might not have been accurate, but in Martin’s mind was going to be on the table no matter what he said on the matter.

A pair of armchairs had been set up in the living room, in front of the 70” smart TV that showed Shawna every crevasse in Steve Carell’s forehead over the fall. Martin motioned for Jack to sit in the one on the right, while the elder Josi took the one on the left, underneath the giant portrait of the Matterhorn. This also allowed Martin access to the end table where he kept necessary provisions. A tall glass of beer was sitting there, the foam indicating just how recently it had been poured. “Come, sit! I insist!” he said, gesturing to the chair as he gracefully plunked himself down into his own La-Z-Boy.

Jack nodded along as Martin had a bit of a spiel, and it ended up with him sitting in what must’ve been one of the most comfortable chairs that he ever had the pleasure to be sitting in. He sunk into the seat a bit, before looking over to Martin who was enjoying what seemed to be a freshly poured beer. The man knew how to have a good time. Jack could respect that. But, that was about the only thing Jack could really respect about Martin.

He glanced a bit behind his seat. “Where’s Shawna, Mr. Josi?” He asked curiously, before taking another glance around the home, ”You have a nice home, by the way.”

“Why, thank you,” Martin commented. “When one gets a lucky bounce of the balls from God, one has to make the best of things, ja?” He leaned forward in the chair, fingers tented as he looked towards Jack. “Shawna will be down in time. I am certain she is just nervous about this event. This is the first time she has been out to this sort of… er, big social dance thing. She has sheltered herself for so long. It’s good to see someone such as yourself be able to look past her… tendencies to find the beauty that I see in there. Plus, I can see another athlete! Clearly the Josi family knows a thing or two about peak physical conditioning!”

“Yeah… Shawna’s a… one of a kind girl!” Jack tried his best to hide his nervousness and the fact that he just made that up on the spot, “Are you an athlete too, Mr. Josi? Shawna never mentioned anything of that sort. I, myself, play wide receiver for the school.”

Martin’s facade broke into laughter for a moment. “Hahaha, I am no athlete. However, my son Nick is playing hockey for Harvard and he’s expected to make his NHL debut this year. My older daughter Lia married a basketball player, so at least the youngest generation is in tune with sports! Hahaha!” However, he quickly returned to the now-familiar stern gaze. “Shawna on the other hand never seemed interested in that life, so it surprises me that a football player, such as yourself, would take such a shine to her so late in her high school tenure. You aren’t hiding any… untowards intentions with this Valentine’s Day date, are you Jack?”

“Unknown intentions?! With Shawna? No sir. Not at all.” Jack said, smiling sheepishly. Thank fucking god he didn’t know what was going on. “I have no intentions with your daughter, sir. No untoward intentions here.” Besides, even though Jack was pretty cool and handsome, he wasn’t no Sunshine.

“No intentions?” Martin allowed himself to be surprised by that statement if only to give himself room to push harder. “No intentions whatsoever? So you plan on abandoning her immediately to go on your merry way at the dance?”

“...no?” Jack was in sort of a hole at this point. “I’m just here to give your daughter a good time at the dance. Nothing more, nothing less.” Jesus, no wonder Shawna wanted Jack to come along. This man was already difficult to deal with, he couldn’t imagine what would happen if Shawna’s secret were to come out.

Martin smirked as he leaned back in his chair, grabbing the beer resting on the side and taking a long sip. A thin film of foam rested upon the mustache portion of his beard. “Well, I remember what good times there are to be had at events such as these. I’m not that old, you know. I also know there are multiple definitions of good times. If you are catching my drift of what good times I am expecting you and my daughter to have, I think then indeed, we will all have some good times. However, if you decide to extend this soiree to your definition of good times, or your friends’ definition of good times, and my daughter’s good times are negatively impacted by this, then I can assure you with the utmost of confidence, that the only good times you will be experiencing afterwards will be in my company. And I have a feeling my definition of good times in that instance will be vastly different from your definition of good times. So, do we have an understanding?”

What in tarnation? What exactly did Shawna tell Martin? It wasn’t like he would even think of Shawna in anywhere even remotely close to that regard. He felt like he was in the beginning of Inglorious Basterds, complete with the rather suspicious German man lecturing at him. But, he had to remember the endgame here. This was all for Shawna’s sake, and not his. He had to play this right. “Yes sir.” Jack nodded, “My good times will not ruin Shawna’s good times.”

“Then we have an arrangement! Excellent!” Martin clapped and stood up. “I would offer you a drink to celebrate, but I know better than to think an athlete such as yourself would be risking every part of your future just for a sip of an admittedly average-quality beer! Instead, I shall let you get on with your night!” The patriarch of the Josi family headed over towards the stairwell. “Shawna! Your gentleman caller has arrived!”

Fucking finally. Now that Jack had passed the test, it was safe for Shawna to come out. Her pacing could cease.

She emerged quickly from her room and came down the staircase, only to be immediately enveloped by her father. Martin gave her a big hug and held her close. “I know this is a big night for you, my dear. But know I will be here and if you find yourself in an unsavory situation, you give me a call and I will make sure you are swiftly whisked away.”

“I know, Dad,” Shawna confirmed. “I’ll be all right. Not like anything is going to happen with the teachers watching everyone like a hawk.”

“I’m certain. But, just in case.”

“You can let me go now.”

Martin finally released his daughter from his grip, allowing her to see Jack for the first time. He had cleaned up well. Had to have done well enough to pass her dad’s eye test. Even if it was very hard to feel threatened by that shirt. She looked over and gave a demure wave. “H-Hi Jack. I’m ready when you are.”

It felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders as Martin stood up and clapped, and he finally called for Shawna after what felt like an eternity underneath the grilling of one Mr. Martin Josi. He was pretty sure everything was just a test. A bit weird, but the more he talked to Martin the more he understood why Shawna was the way that she was regarding her secret.

Watching Shawna come down the stairs, there was a small smirk on his face as he saw her with what might’ve been one of the most gorgeous dresses he’d seen. He gave a small wave back, before walking over to the Josis. “Alright, shall we head out, Shawna? After you, ladies first after all.”

“So polite!” Shawna commented as her father looked on. Martin allowed a knowing nod as the two teenagers moved towards the front hall. “I’ll let you know when we head back, Dad!”

“See that you do! I will be a nervous wreck until I know you are safe!”

“OK!” Shawna led Jack towards the door. “Let’s go,” she said quickly under her breath.

Leading Shawna out of the house, Jack quickly darted over to his car, before pulling the passenger door open for her. “Feel free to pull the seat up a bit if it’s too far back. I don’t know who’s been in this car, Shawna.” Jack smirked, before closing the door after she got in.

“Well, that’s comforting,” Shawna commented as she held her dress so she could slide into the Viper. She could finally drop the shy, innocent act now that she was safely in the car.

It wasn’t long before Jack climbed into the driver’s seat, and set off.

Shawna looked over at the man who just took an inquisition for her with an empathetic tone on her face. “Thank you for sitting through all that,” she said, a tone of remorse present. “I swear, he doesn’t even sound like that normally. Pretty sure he just puts on the Nazi accent to scare anyone he doesn’t trust. He’s gotten so good at it though…”

“All I’m gonna say, Shawna…” Jack said, looking over to her momentarily as he drove, “I totally understand.”

The girl let out a huge sigh. “I figured he had to be seen to be believed. That’s why I kinda need you right now. At least until I figure out how the hell I’m going to explain literally everything.”

“Listen, like I said, I totally understand.” Jack shrugged, “I thought it was a little weird at first, but after meeting your dad, it makes sense! No offense, of course. But dude is scary.”

“None taken,” Shawna confirmed. “Ever since that Pre-Calc test last June, he’s been watching me closer than ever. The summer was terrible. I told so many lies just to get out of the house. That cruise my parents went on was honestly the best thing that could have happened to me. But, now it’s back to the double life. At least now I have some help.

Jack shook his head, before seeing a particular something out of the corner of his eye, “I got your back, dude” Jack winked at Shawna, before looking ahead and squinting, “Wait, yo, is that the country club there? Or am I just tripping?”

Shawna looked ahead to try and make out what Jack was talking about before the familiar front of Crown Heights Country Club came into view. “Yup, that’s the place,” she affirmed. “I can hear Dad bragging about the time he shot an 85 on the golf course from here. Least we got here in one piece.”

“Perfect. Right on time, aren’t we?”

Pulling into the parking lot, Jack stuffed his car into a slot, parking it more toward his side so that Shawna had more room to get out. Not that she needed it of course. Putting the top up, Jack quickly got out again, opening the door for Shawna to allow her to get out of the rather low car. “Let’s go turn some heads, yeah?”

Shawna nodded, definitely feeling in safer hands with Jack then she would have at this point last month. “Let’s do the damn thing!” She punctuated this with a fist in the air as the two made their way towards the lame school dance they were going to work they way through.

Route 1 was never going to be a difficult path to traverse. As Lilith stated, it was a baby trail for babies. The various Normal types and occasional Dark type were barely a match for the wide array of Pokemon the trainers had available for combat. The biggest challenge was walking uphill the entire time. Viridian City served as a midway point between the coastal Pallet Town and the mountainous Pewter City. It was all going to be uphill from here. Both metaphorically and literally.

The gates to the verdant city were underwhelming to say the least, but the place still had a Pokemon Center and a Pokemart. Provisions could be bought. Allies could be healed. The journey may have just started, but every bit of rest would be welcome.



Excellent, Joseph! Please move Ant over to the characters tab! He is accepted!
As the man's Pokemon bounded up the lane, meat snack in it's hand, the contrast between Lilith's Pokemon and his was stark. While Sia was always calm and reserved, willing to wait and ride along with her trainer, the male's Oshawott seemed wild and defiant. Especially when it decided that the trainer needed some protein. Does he have no control over his Pokemon at all? It just seems to do whatever the blazes it wants! How disrespectful. Then he attempted to talk...

“Whaphs mmyour nameh byf th’ wayf? Realized I didn't catch yours back at the lab."

While initially repulsed by the attempt to speak BeefJerkese at her, a sigh of relief passed over Lilith. The fact that... who was it? The dude had a name... Ezra! That's what Gary said! Anyway, the fact that Ezra was asking for her identity meant Lilith may have been successful in covering up her true name. It was way too early for anyone to know the truth. She had a reputation to... well, build in Kanto, but still, it would have been really hard to establish any kind of a proper tone with a name like the one she had been given. Kari might have worked, but it was still way too cute. Nope, she was committed to her current moniker. For better or worse.

"It's understandable. I am not known in Kanto by choice. My name is better uttered in the darkest corners, where the shadows are already plentiful. My title is the Mistress of Lost Souls, but it gets tiresome hearing that every time, so I answer to Lilith. You can use that name as well."

"Litwick! Lit!" And I'm Sia! Hello!

Lilith nodded. "And this is my oldest partner in this endeavour. Her name is Sia. She feeds on life energy, so don't get too close."

Sia gave Lilith a shocked look. "Lit! Lit! Litwicklit..." Hey! Hey! I only want a little bit...

"Anyway, I suppose if we are travelling together, it's good to know those sort of things about one another. Like if I feel I need a hot beef injection in my mouth, I can ask your Pokemon for help with that." Yes, the obvious sexual innuendo didn't do much for her dark and brooding image, but c'mon. It was right there. Lilith is shadowy, but she's not going to miss easy shots. Her newly-captured Pidgey can attest to that. I'll have to wait until we get to Viridian City to properly assess Pidgey. Pidgey is probably still pretty burnt up from battle.



With assistance from Sunshine @HaleyTheRandom





Shawna was still internally shaking her head at what the hell just happened in the hallway. "I'm really going to a school dance with a damn football player. I think ninth-grade me would have fainted at that news. Fuck, I might do that." She made it to a quiet hallway and just let herself collapse against the wall. "Fuck... I gotta talk to someone..."

With her phone at the ready, she knew who her first choice was to talk to. It was just a matter of if she would available to chat at the moment or if she was busy solving the same problem she did...

"Hey, so I think I managed to find someone for this dumb dance."

She leaned back and waited to see if Sunshine was going to respond or not. However, Shawna didn't have to wait long...

"Oh really?! Who? Anyone I know?"

I'm pretty sure you're not the muff bunny cheerleader, so I'm gonna guess not really...

"No. I will buy all your lunches for the rest of the year if you manage to guess"

"Uh... I don't know. 😂 Kavi? Or Ariel? Maybe... Chris?"
"Fuck babe. I really don't know. 😂 Give a girl a hint."


Knew it. Haha. All right, how do I give this away...

"Fine XP Think about the last person who you would possibly think I would date."

"OH MY GOD."
"Jack. Jack. Fucking. Goff."
"Oh my god Shawna, tell me you didn't."

"OK..... I won't tell you then..."


Shawna expected it wouldn't have been high on Sunshine's list of targets, but the fact that she got the name was impressive. Still, she didn't seem pleased. Shit, did Jack do something to Sunshine? I will kick him in the nuts if he hurt her somehow...

">.> If he flirts with you, touches you, even so much as looks at you to long --- I'll take a page out of Ariels book and break his nose."

The brunette stifled a laugh. Ariel will help you. I know she will.

"😂 Girl, I told him the exact same thing."
"I told him if I get one dick pic, it's getting cut off."

"Good. I'll be sure to let him know too."


Now that Shawna had someone she was willing to be her full self with, she didn't even bother to hold back an obvious innuendo that sprang to mind.

"Two pairs of scissors are better than one 😏 So who did you ask?"

"I got Chanel to go with me. Figured that was best since we hadn't been hanging out much with classes and stuff picking up."


Hmmmm... so she did get Chanel huh... I guess that's good... Chanel has so much more going on than me though. Would she... nah. I don't even think Chanel is a lesbian.

"Well that's good! I knew you had her top of the list. Although, same thing as with Jack."
"If she makes a move on you, not saying she will, but if she does, I break her like I break lacrosse sticks"

"LOL. You have nothing to worry about. Promise. 🖤 Pretty sure she has her eyes set on Chrissie anyway."


WAIT, WHAT!?! If Shawna had been drinking something, she would have coated the hallway with it. Instead, she just dropped her phone in such a way that she hoped she didn't crack it. Luckily it was still pristine. Um. OK. So maybe Chanel does swing that way. I never would have guessed. Wow. And for Chrissie! Oh my girl. My sweet ice cream girl, you got some kinda treat coming if this is true!

"0-0 Really? Wow. Really? Shit. I wonder if Chrissie knows... I should talk to her soon."

"We could totally play match maker. Tell me they wouldn't be one bomb ass couple?"


This text did two things for Shawna. One, it confirmed there was no interest in Chanel from Sunshine, which was a relief. Two, it brought up the intriguing possibility that she could finally fulfill the destiny of so many sitcom character and try and get two people that were meant for each other together. Fuck, that shouldn't be too hard. I've seen it on Friends and the Office and Brooklyn Nine-Nine how many freaking times? Plus, Chrissie needs this. Damn, does she ever need this.

"I mean, we would still be the best bomb ass couple... but that could totally work for Chrissie!"

"Lmao. I love you 😂."

"She has needed to get over Jason so hard."

"But yeah. We should totally work something out. Men ain't shit."
"I gotta run to class. I'll talk to you later. ❤️"


Isn't that the truth. Fuck, is this what it's like to actually be in on the tea? This is fun. I kinda like it.

"Love you too hun. See you later 😉 ❤️ "

Content with that, Shawna left the hallway and headed off to class herself. At least plans were now in place. All the plans. This school could still suck it, but maybe Valentine's Day won't after all.






“Be safe, don't do anything I wouldn't.”

“Okay, mom.”

“Dress for the weather, and if you run out of any money call me, okay? Fin or I can send you some.”

“Yes, mom.”

“Call me every evening without fail so I know you're safe.”

“Uh huh.”

“-Give Ems my love and tell her that I expect her to be safe too. Oh, and, if you decide to get freaky make sure to wear protection-”

“O.KAY. We are not doing this. Bye mom, love you! I'll send Emi your regards!”
The phone practically smashed against the kitchen counter as Josephine looked at Emilia sheepishly. “Shit, I'm sorry, you know mom and how she's like, haha... She sends her regards!” Josie laughed nervously as she returned to her open luggage. Under some old pairs of shorts and a printed Twenty One Pilots tee were three pringles cans and some energy drinks tucked away carefully as if carrying contraband on an aircraft. “I got your pizza fix by the way.”

Emilia abandoned her shiny golden suitcase on the kitchen table for the moment to come over and peer at her best friend’s wares. Her eyes lit up seeing the multi-flavored goodness of the pizza-flavored chips concealed within. “You are the absolute best, Josie! You know that, right?” She could have honestly hugged Josie then and there. Grandma Hedvig was adamant that Emilia only needed one tube of Pringles for the opening leg of this wild journey the crew was embarking on. She was worried she wasn’t going to make it to the promised land of Las Vegas. Luckily for her, she knew people had her back.

That was one lesson if anything Emilia learned from everything that had happened in the previous month. There were plenty of people that had her back. They all had their different ways of showing it, but she had enough friends that cared about her and wanted to see her happy. The fact that people still wanted to hang out with her and invited her on massive cross-country road trips. Josie was the first person Emilia had over since the… incident. It was a nice return to normalcy. She really knew how to keep Emi’s mind off things.

“Seriously, you’re a lifesaver. I tried to load up on vital supplies at Target yesterday, but Gramma was watching me like a hawk. I only got one thing of orange soda!”

“That is because you don’t need any more than that! You do not need to be racking up dental bills on the road!” The clap back came from well down the hall, where Gramma Hedvig was likely still sitting on the couch watching TV.

“Gramma! How the fudge did you even hear me?”

“I am not that old yet, my little Lia! A teacher’s ears hear all!”

Emilia smiled nervously at Josie before whispering, “It’s OK. When we get to McDonald’s to pick up the drinks for everyone, I’m just gonna get another couple extra beverages for us. We should be set that way.”

“As long as we pick up some fries as well. There’s no such thing as too early.” Josie whispered back as she hid her contraband once again. If there was anything she liked more than hair dye during a 4am meltdown, it was food. Sami and Rey came to mind, as the best chefs in BHHS, and that thought alone caused her stomach to grumble on time.

“I swear, with Sami coming along I feel we’ll gain a few pounds before the trip is up.” Not that she was complaining because that man can make some godly fucking food, but a girl’s gotta look nice for her man-that-is-not-actually-her-man. “Yeah, no, these leather pants are a bad fuc- fudging idea.” Josie quickly corrected herself, following Emi’s colourful replacement of the expletive. “Can I leave them in your room for now? They’re just taking extra space when I can bring like, more pringles or something.” Josie pulled out some tight fitting leggings with a grimace, showing them off for Emi to see. She tried to experiment with her clothes for the trip, but now that she had a chance to examine everything one more time… She found herself regretting that ASOS binge more than ever.

Emilia gave Josie a look when she revealed the shiny pants that she indicated. They definitely did not look like they were going to be the least bit comfortable for a long trip through the country. Then again, she bought herself a brand new black leather jacket for the trip, so who was she to judge? Actually, I should go get that jacket if we’re going to be getting ready to leave soon…

She smiled at her friend. “Sure thing, Josie! C’mon, we can go put it in the closet in my room!”

The two girls headed upstairs towards Emilia’s sunny retreat, even if the room had seen a lot more clouds lately. It was clear there had been some redecorating done in between prom and today. The vanity mirror that held a bunch of couples photos was now laid bare with just a few shots of Emilia with Josie, Reyna, Ava and a couple others lining the frame. Faded blue circles of sticky tack dotted the yellow walls above her bed, whatever they held up long since dispatched to the garbage. A pile of discarded clothes lie in front of the closet, mostly rejects from Emilia’s golden suitcase that were destined to be washed when Grandma Hedvig had the time. It was the closet that she gestured to. ”Should still be plenty of room in there from packing last night! Go ahead and select a hanger… although… if you want to let me borrow them, they might go well my new jacket…”

“Well, our sizes are the same… Go ahead and try.” Josie handed the cursed pants over to Emilia. She knew two burritos would be all it takes before the leggings would burst on herself, and the damned thing had fake pockets. Cursed, really.

It was easy to notice the missing pictures of B all over. She’d been to Emi’s before the incident, and her room had been as if cupid had vomited all over. Now, Josie sort of missed that, at least Emi was happier then. Josie examined one of the photos on the vanity, smiling back at the picture of two middle school girls covered in flour from a failed attempt at participating at their local bake sale.

“Your grandma still doesn’t let me live that down.” Josie said, pointing at the picture. “How was I to know that whisking all that flour at once would be a bad idea?”

Emilia accepted the leggings and quickly dropped the cut-off shorts she was wearing to try them on. “Yeah, but think of the life experience we got from that! We now know that white is definitely not a good color for either of us to dye our hair! And we definitely know not to eat anything that Mikayla Shaw makes unless the pipes need a good cleaning!”

As she pulled the pants up on her legs, they were a little snug but they were coming on nicely. There wasn’t a lot of black in Emilia’s wardrobe, as she usually preferred to stick to the bright colors of the palette, but these were working for her. She fished her leather jacket off the knob of her chair and slung it over her yellow tank top. The dark colors just made her tank and the bright blue pendant stand out even more by contrast. “What do you think? Do I look totally badass now? Could I demand protection money like this?”

Nobody could rock the bright colours better than Emi, so seeing her in a near all-black ensemble was a rare but glorious sight. “Maybe you can demand protection money from babies first.” Josie giggled, examining Emilia from head to toe. No matter the outfit, Emi still looked too sweet and wholesome to really give off the dangerous bad girl vibes, but she could certainly try. “You look great, hun. Oh! What if we do something cute with your hair too? We can rock up with matching space buns!” Josie’s bright pink hair was half tied away from her face in two messy space buns, leaving wavy wisps to frame her oval face.

”We totally could! And then I can really intimidate all those babies into giving me their candy!” Emilia laughed for a second before quickly backtracking. “I’m just kidding, of course. I would never do such a thing. Babies are so sweet and innocent and pure. Let me see, I think I have a headband buried in the closet from that time I was a hippie for Halloween. We can use that to hold my hair back while you do your thing.”

As the blonde started digging through the back of her pile of clothes looking for the elusive headband, she attacked the mounds with gusto until she suddenly stopped. It was a split-second before she fell to her knees, bawling as tears started to fall, spared from hitting the floor by the collected fabrics.

Josie, although alarmed, was prepared for Code Blue. Quickly as Emilia's mood swings hit, Josie bounded over to her friend to wrap one arm around her, holding her close as her other hand was busy unlocking her phone to open Spotify. “I got you, I got you,” She uttered lightly, until her finger selected the perfect song. The familiar voice of Ariana Grande filled the room, just barely louder than Emi's sobs.

Don't matter how, what, where, who tries it
We're out here vibin', we vibin', we vibin'


Josie lightly sang along, rubbing circles into Emi's shoulder and letting Ariana Grande handle the rest. “That asshole doesn’t deserve your tears, ‘pick it up’ girl.”

Emilia’s sobs started to ebb as she turned to her bestie, hands still clutching the faded gray Los Angeles Chargers t-shirt that wasn’t burned with the rest of Brandon’s belongings. There was no way it belonged to anyone in the house. The family stuck to their Minnesota roots as Vikings fans. It was definitely the Mendoza boy’s gear. Emilia started to cry in tune with Ariana’s beat as she let Josie envelop her in comfort.

In the doorway, the eldest member of the household appeared, still in her tracksuit, grey hair bound up in a way that combined Josie’s dual buns into one giant one. “Oh thank god. I could hear her crying over Hoda Kotb. You have her taken care of, Josie dear?”

“I got her, don’t worry. She’s already calming down, see?” Josephine held her tighter just as Ariana Grande began belting the pre-chorus. She put down her phone in front of Emi as she began to grab at the t-shirt in her hand. "Trash doesn't belong in your house, let me get rid of it for you," she muttered as she began prying Emi's fingers off the shirt.

Emilia eventually relented and released her grip from the garment.

“Here,” Hedvig said, taking the t-shirt from Josie. “I will dispose of this and then we might as well get you girls over to the school as long as I am up and moving.” She headed back towards the door before turning around. “Thank you for taking care of her, dear. You may need to do that a bit on this trip…”

The granddaughter shook her head. “I… *sniff* I’ll be fine, Gramma…”

“As long as I have battery on my phone and a voice to sing along, I’ll make sure Emi can always calm down.” Josephine promised Hedvig with a smile.

Hedvig nodded as she went downstairs to get some lighter fluid and matches from the garage. There was always time for a quick barbecue, no matter what the cops said.

Emilia turned back to Josie and buried her head in her friend’s shoulder. She kept moving in time to the song as she began to calm down. “Thank you, Josie. You always got me covered…”

Thank the gods for Ariana Grande. Josie sighed with relief as Emilia stopped shaking in her arms, still crying but definitely something that she could recover from. "We'll always have each other's back. I'll always save you, whether its from spit or tears," she added.

Eventually, the song came to an end and only when Josephine felt convinced that Emilia was doing fine did she let the blonde go. "Come, I'll fix up that concealer of yours then I'm gonna make you look hot. Then, we're gonna step into the car park with you looking as fierce as Ariana did during her Billboard performance in 2016, deal?"

The formerly-sobbing girl gave a final sniff and nodded, keeping herself from dabbing at the mascara that was running down her face. “That sounds good. I’d like that.”





As the sun glistened off the bright white paint of the 1996 Volvo 850 that ambled its way through the hills of Los Angeles, the driver muttered to herself in soft Swedish that could not be understood by the other two occupants of the vehicle. Although one could hazard a guess that the cursing was directed at the two teenagers on their phones, ambling through the crosswalk at a snail’s pace while they deciphered the latest IG stories on their phones. After the two finally lurched out of the car’s way, Hedvig punched the gas as efficiently as she could manage, which meant the Volvo was soon back up to its cruising speed of 35 mph.

“Hmmph,” she grunted as the street was finally clear of the phone slugs. “I swear, kids these days can’t even be bothered to look up at the scenery if it isn’t coated in some filter of rabbit ears or rainbow hoodies or something,” she commented, unaware that her passengers were also looking into their phones at the moment. At least as best they could while monitoring the four trays of drinks that the girls had split between themselves. “And how many kids are coming on this trip you had to buy that many drinks for them? No one else have a dollar to spare? I keep telling you not to let them take advantage of you, little Lia.”

“Gramma, it’s fine!” Emilia assured her. “It’s dollar drinks for a reason! And there are a lot of people, like 12 or 13 of us I think AJ said. Besides, Josie needed her fry fix. It’s very important to set a proper tone for the day.”

"Wait, 13? I thought some of these were doubles..." Josephine looked down at one of the trays in her possession with despair. So much for her two plastic cups of orange fanta. Hopefully someone would appreciate it as much as it deserves... She wondered who all would be coming along - no doubt they were all close friends of AJ or Val. That... probably meant Nate was also coming along.

“Wha?!? They aren’t doubles! There’s one for everyone!” Emilia nervously laughed trying to cover up her plan. It was clear how effective that was as Hedvig gave her granddaughter a side-eyed stare of disbelief.

"Shi..." Josie cut off before she could finish her swear, aware that she was in the car with Emilia and her grandmother. And her concerns were confirmed as she found a small-ish group together in the parking lot of their old high school, the face of Nathan Matthews clear right beside Leon Barnes. "I... Is it too late to leave?" The prom drama was still too fresh in her mind, and the pink hair was a clear indication of it.

Emilia was well aware of what happened between Josie and Nate at prom. It was the trade off in their sessions of the past month as they both had romantic grievances to air out. Emilia even helped decide the new color of hair that Josie was going to switch to. Pink was so cute on her. But she did have a solid friendship with Nate from their time in the photography club, and she was ready to act as an intermediary between the two. It was the least she could since Josie had been helping her so much lately.

“It probably is at this point,” Emilia confirmed. “But it will be OK, Sophie. I’ll support you. He won’t be able to hurt you. Besides, Sami will be here. He won’t let anything happen to either of us.”

“That Sami,” Hedvig chimed in. “You tell him to be careful and stop leading with his face, ya? I am not going to be able to patch him up for a while, so he better not be trying to get into a fight in every state he visits!”

That did earn a giggle from Emilia. “I will tell him, Gramma. Thank you for driving us.”

“Of course, Emilia,” Hedvig said as she brought her only granddaughter in for one of those hugs that were designed to warm even the coldest heart during those long Minnesota nights. “Remember, if you need me, I am a call away, and we will fly you back home if you need it. You are loved, my dear.”

“I’ll try to remember, Gramma.”

With Emilia settled, Hedvig turned her attention to the other passenger. She reached back and pulled Josie in as well. “And you, my dear, the same goes for you. You will be all right on this trip. You two have each other at the very least. Keep supporting each other and the country will fall to its knees in front of you. You are such a strong girl. You remember that too.”

Josie resisted the urge to Emi-cry at her words. She returned the hug enthusiastically while making sure to protect the cartons of drinks in her lap. She considered Hedvig like one of her own grandmothers at this point, as her only grandmother from her mother's side had already long passed. She appreciated the sentiment, smiling back warmly at Hedvig before nudging Emi with her elbow. "Thanks Grams, I'll be sure to look out for Emi for the two of us. She's in safe hands on this trip." Josie assured the elderly woman once again.

Josie then turned to look at Emi, then out the window towards the parking lot outside. "We should get going, it's almost time to get in the van." If she stayed in the car any longer, she'd beg Grams to take her home to avoid her inevitably awkward encounter with Nate.

“Good. Time for you to get going. I am already missing my stories to see you two off. You should depart,” Hedvig affirmed.

Emilia nodded, trying to juggle her own trays of McCafe beverages and dollar drinks as she opened the Volvo’s door to get out. She set the liquids on top before fishing her suitcase and her backpack out of the trunk, acquiring Josie’s gear at the same time. When her grandmother was confident everything necessary had been removed from the vehicle, she gave a quick wave and took off back to the Seger homestead.

Emilia looked at Josie to make sure she was all right with everything before they went to join the others. “Hey, it’s like Gramma said. We’ll be fine. We’ll just hide out in the van or the RV or…" The blonde trailed off as she finally caught sight of everyone who was present in the parking lot. There was no AJ, but Sami was there, as was Aleks and Reyna and Ava and ...her.

Katie fudging Callaghan. Bags in tow.

Emilia turned back to Josie. “Oh my god, Josie, why is she here? Why is Katie here?!? I...no. I can’t. I can call Gramma, she can come back and get us. I can’t… She… she…”

Just like how Josie had her own demons to face, Emi seemed to have hers too. Immediately as promised, Josie went into protective mode, rushing to make sure that Emi wouldn’t start crying again. “Emi, no, you said so yourself. It’s too late.” Josie looked between her and Katie, internally panicking as well. How were they supposed to enjoy a peaceful trip when their troubles would be following them the whole way? Josie loved Katie, she did, but she wasn’t looking forward to the next few days.

“Look, we’re bad bitches, okay? You look amazing with your hair and makeup done, with your badass leather look and you will carry on and wow everyone at that parking lot. Katie or no Katie, we’re gonna enjoy this damn trip. Now, are you coming with me or am I going to have to make a fool of myself in front of Sami without you?” Josephine looked at Emilia pointedly.

The blonde was desperately trying to keep the tears from flowing for a second time before noon, and it looked like Josie’s words were going to be enough this time. No Ariana needed. She bit her lip and nodded back to her BFF. “No… no. You’re right. I’m right. We… we’re right. We… we can do this. Also, if anything, Sami’s probably already done something, so we should be in the clear, right? Right.” If Emilia had a hand to twirl her hair, it would be in knots right now. However, with the luggage and the drinks occupying her limbs, there was nothing to do but take in a deep breath, ignore the heck out of Katie for now and deliver the payload she and Josie had brought. “OK. Let’s get over there.”

The two slowly made their way towards the area of the parking lot where Sami was congregating with some of the other members of the trip that weren’t named Katie or Nate. “Aloha, everybody!” Emilia nervously stammered out, completely muting the effect of her leather-heavy outfit. “Hope everyone is thirsty! But not too thirsty…” She looked around but didn’t spot the person who actually got her and Josie involved in this crazy cross-country road trip. “Where’s AJ at? His beverage is gonna get all warm… and drank…”



Current Location: Route 2



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