Penny Member
STATUS: Luckily history suggests an infinite ability for people to be shit heads ;) 13 days ago
- Last Seen: 5 hrs ago
- Joined: 8 yrs ago
- Posts: 4680 (1.70 / day)
- VMs: 13
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- Penny 8 yrs ago
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Recent Statuses
13 days ago
Current
Luckily history suggests an infinite ability for people to be shit heads ;)
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1 yr ago
Achmed the Snake
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1 yr ago
It's kind of insane to me that people ever met without dating apps. It is just so inefficient.
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2 yrs ago
One, polyamory is notoriously difficult to administer
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2 yrs ago
I'm guessing it immediately failed because everyone's computer broke/work got busy/grand parents died
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Bio
Early 30's. I know just enough about everything to be dangerous.
Most Recent Posts
Jocasta snickered as she chewed her mouthful of jerky. Some of the herbs she had in her pouches were technically edible, but she had nothing she could really consider food. Some adventurer she was she thought as she turned her new found knife over in her hands, examining the strange rippling steel in the fitful firelight.
"I can honsetly say this is in my top two strangests dates. Top three if you count the time I dropped that coach and horse team through the great bridge on Eventide," she admitted. She felt extremely tired now that the adrenaline had somewhat worn off and the warmth of the meagre fire had banished at least a little of the chill. It would be night above ground now, though keeping track of the time was more a matter of guesswork than science. She watched the flame as it devoured another piece of root and an idea occured to her.
"I suppose if we head towards areas where there are more roots we must be getting closer to the surface right? THey must connect to a tree afterall," she supposed. The roots here might be from a single massive tree, but judging by the subtle differences in size and girth Jocasta thought it more likely there was a forest overhead. The events of the afternoon were confused but she thought they were probably under the low hills a mile or two from the caravan route.
"What about you? Do you make a habit of rescuing damsels in distress and then leading them through ancient cursed catacombs? Or am I just special?" she teased.
"I can honsetly say this is in my top two strangests dates. Top three if you count the time I dropped that coach and horse team through the great bridge on Eventide," she admitted. She felt extremely tired now that the adrenaline had somewhat worn off and the warmth of the meagre fire had banished at least a little of the chill. It would be night above ground now, though keeping track of the time was more a matter of guesswork than science. She watched the flame as it devoured another piece of root and an idea occured to her.
"I suppose if we head towards areas where there are more roots we must be getting closer to the surface right? THey must connect to a tree afterall," she supposed. The roots here might be from a single massive tree, but judging by the subtle differences in size and girth Jocasta thought it more likely there was a forest overhead. The events of the afternoon were confused but she thought they were probably under the low hills a mile or two from the caravan route.
"What about you? Do you make a habit of rescuing damsels in distress and then leading them through ancient cursed catacombs? Or am I just special?" she teased.
"Maybe take off the other sleeve and make it a vest?" Jocasta postulated as she tried to catch her breath as she absently admired Beren's muscular arm with one eye and watched the ancient barrow king with the other. The later continued to stare at them, greenish witchfires glowing malevolently in its eyesockets. Despite its evident hate, the creature did not seem willing to risk passing the blades. Evidently the ancient steel was heavy enough and sharp enough to give pause even to ancient champions of undeath. As always, Jocasta was unable to help herself. She stuck her tongue out at the wright. The witchfires flared white hot and the ancient corpse thrust its head forth and unhinged its mouldering jaw. Arctic air blasted forth in a torrent of physical cold that coated every surface of the chamber. An almost physical ball of ice struck the swinging blades and burst around them like a crashing wave. Jets of cold struck hard enough that Jocasta felt stones crack as the moisture in them flash froze in a heartbeat. The blades slowed almost to a stop for a fraction of a second as she stood with frost in her eyelashes.
"You were clearly the child who poked the beehive with a stick," Beren remarked dryly. The barrow king rehinged his jaw, then abruptly turned and strode off out of view beyond the passage.
"Well, anyone you run screaming away from," Jocasta replied. She turned and surveyed the new chamber, greedy eyes following inscriptions on the wall with the care of a librarian.
"What now? I don't imagine our friend there is simply off to make a complaint and I don't fancy trying to double back through the Demon Cheesegrater," she asked.
"Oh, I'm Jocasta by the way," she concluded brightly.
"You were clearly the child who poked the beehive with a stick," Beren remarked dryly. The barrow king rehinged his jaw, then abruptly turned and strode off out of view beyond the passage.
"Well, anyone you run screaming away from," Jocasta replied. She turned and surveyed the new chamber, greedy eyes following inscriptions on the wall with the care of a librarian.
"What now? I don't imagine our friend there is simply off to make a complaint and I don't fancy trying to double back through the Demon Cheesegrater," she asked.
"Oh, I'm Jocasta by the way," she concluded brightly.
"Well it probably cant lift the..." Jocasta began before a booming impact blasted dust from the seams of the coffin, lifting Beren and the stone lid like a hard footstep shifting a doorstop. Beren sprawled over the sarcophagus trying to hold it closed as three more blows rattled off the inside.
"Ok... well I can..." Jocasta said, pulling her hematallow from her pouch. A minor alteration of the spell would let her seal the lid to the coffin so that... CRUNCH. Dust exploded around a hole in the stone as the eldrich corpse within drove a fist through two inches of solid rock missing Beren by a few inches at most. The skeletal hand began to reach around, trying to find whatever or, in this case whomever, was impeding its well earned ritual murder rampage.
"Lets..." Jocasta began again. Beren nodded.
"Lets," he agreed. The both bolted. Beren hurdled off the top of the sarcophagus a moment before the lid exploded upwards like an over pressurised pot, flipping several times before it crashed to the ground and broke in half with a titanic crash. Jocasta was still staring as the corpse sat up in its mouldering funeral garb and began to climb free. Beren caught her and half shoved, half carried her down a side passage, through a series of decending archways.
"We don't need to be going down..." Jocasta tried to object as she managed to get her feet underher. The burst into another chamber much like the first. This one was in worse condition than the first. Gnarled roots of an unhealthy whitish color were in the process of prising appart the ancient stonework, their relentless assault having already tumbled masonry down to block one of the exits. They splashed through a pool of blackish water that was for sure filled with leeches and the gods knew what else.
"Flee now, cartography later," Beren suggested.
"Ok... well I can..." Jocasta said, pulling her hematallow from her pouch. A minor alteration of the spell would let her seal the lid to the coffin so that... CRUNCH. Dust exploded around a hole in the stone as the eldrich corpse within drove a fist through two inches of solid rock missing Beren by a few inches at most. The skeletal hand began to reach around, trying to find whatever or, in this case whomever, was impeding its well earned ritual murder rampage.
"Lets..." Jocasta began again. Beren nodded.
"Lets," he agreed. The both bolted. Beren hurdled off the top of the sarcophagus a moment before the lid exploded upwards like an over pressurised pot, flipping several times before it crashed to the ground and broke in half with a titanic crash. Jocasta was still staring as the corpse sat up in its mouldering funeral garb and began to climb free. Beren caught her and half shoved, half carried her down a side passage, through a series of decending archways.
"We don't need to be going down..." Jocasta tried to object as she managed to get her feet underher. The burst into another chamber much like the first. This one was in worse condition than the first. Gnarled roots of an unhealthy whitish color were in the process of prising appart the ancient stonework, their relentless assault having already tumbled masonry down to block one of the exits. They splashed through a pool of blackish water that was for sure filled with leeches and the gods knew what else.
"Flee now, cartography later," Beren suggested.
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