Rica

*POSITIVE* LGBT++ hangout, anybody? *CIS/STRAIGHT WELCOME TOO* :D

-awkwardly looks at her mixed pile of games people think are great and games people think are horrid and loves them all-

I guess I'm just garbage 8D

*POSITIVE* LGBT++ hangout, anybody? *CIS/STRAIGHT WELCOME TOO* :D

@Dynamo Frokane I lack the right equipment to do that for ya bud. Apologies :P

Rica's FxF 18+ 1x1 Hunt Fandom and Original (Updated Consistently)

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Adversity and Pride

@Buddha Exactly. I don't hate you or anyone else. I might seem very.....pushy but that's because this is just something I'm very passionate about. It's not out of any genuine anger or hatred.

Just lots of passion stuffed into a 5'2" queer woman with lots to say. :P

Trust me if you get me started on Pokemon or something I'll be just as passionate because I do (as everyone does) have a life and identity outside of my sexual orientation.

It's just its own culture and community and one that I'm pretty proud to be a part of.

Adversity and Pride

@Buddha

I'm sure you realize as well as me that this is a specific example and that, with a simple google search, you can pull up stuff that's much less a gag and more or less straight up sexual, my friend.

You've never been in a Spencer's have you? I've been seeing stuff like this since I was 13 and old enough to go into the mall by myself without adult supervision.

It's a party. You go to the party. You deal with the party. You don't go to the hosts throwing the party for themselves and say 'Hey I don't like this.' even though the party isn't even for you.

So.. if they don't want to change from a female into a male or male into a female, are they transgender? Because you lost me now. The concept of gender seems to be lost on you. What you're describing is not gender. Gender is not a coloring book where you can draw what you want. It's something that we created socially in order to organize ourselves and create labels for people.

The labels happen to be male, female, and transgender.

Gender isn't a binary. It's not. It's not one or the other. Gender is horribly complex and people shouldn't just decide 'the brain works like THIS' when we don't know. We also have proof that gender is far more complex than boy or girl.

More than that Sex, Gender, and Gender Presentation are very different. I can dress as much as a man as I like. I'm still a woman. Changing my clothes or hair doesn't suddenly change that I'm a cisgendered woman. My roommate wearing a dress doesn't suddenly make him not a transgendered man. Those are still very true things.

There's also a theory that gender might just be a social construct (which is entirely possible because we don't very well understand the brain still.).

I'm also not very empahetic, mostly because I really don't care.

You're not unique in this. Most heterosexual people are either outright hateful, don't care (like you do), or try to be 'allies' and end up making it all about themselves and how 'wonderful' they are for being supportive. There are some that do the right thing and things are improving overall but it's a simple fact that 'I don't care' or 'You deserve it' is the general response to horrible treatment of LGBTQ+ people. See: The response to the Pulse incident was overall either anti-Muslim (Don't care and 'allies') or how sinful we were and that God was just enacting his wrath on us sinful fags.

How does one get 'greedy' when it comes to sex :/

I don't fucking know. It's just an assumption that bisexuals will cheat because they 'can't be satisfied by one gender' and it's fucking stupid. I hate it so much.

for issues that were not related to sexuality

You hit the nail on the head here. Yes Heterosexual people suffer too and yes they consider suicide too.

They've never had to deal with the feeling of wanting to die just for something you can't help or control. For something that shouldn't even be a problem.

I also wonder why Americans are so obsessed with heritage and culture.

Because our country is so mixed and complex with so many different heritages and cultures to pull from. So people want to cling to their personal traditions so they don't get lost.

The US is very unique. Our country isn't 'One' heritage like many others are. Ours is such a mix that everyone is free to express their culture openly. (Legally anyway. Culturally however is another story.)

Adversity and Pride

@Rica Why do you celebrate in the way that you do? A simple google search for 'gay pride' already shows images of dudes licking phallic shaped lollipops, dudes dancing around with nothing but some shorts on and just generally things I don't want to see in public.

NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE GAY. Because it's shit that I don't want to see.

If I go around licking lollipops shaped like a vagina that'd be a little fucking odd don't you think? I've told you before specifically the reasons why I think celebrations in public in the way that they occur are fucking stupid (mostly because they're not enforcing acceptance or encouraging unity, but rather enforce non-unity and segregation and separation.)

@Buddha

As vilageidiot said those are pretty common gag gifts and honestly if it's in the dead middle of what's essentially a party I really doubt people would care.

I'm not sure what your point is because your words are jumbled but from what I understand you're saying that because I am European I shouldn't get to speak on what I think of gay prides?

No I'm not. I actually don't think you understand exactly what it's like to live in this world as a queer person because you, by your own words, aren't. That simple.

The way to acceptance is in my opinion NOT having a gay pride, it's fitting in and showing you are just as human as the next person.

That'd be easier if we weren't killed for exposing ourselves and assumed straight unless we tell every human being we meet otherwise.

At the same time transgenderism is a mental disease (that makes it sound bad, but really, it is.) Your brain feels like a woman/man when your sex is the opposite. There is a cure namely a sex change. I think that transgender people deserve all the help they can get in this process, however I want to remind you that the amount of people that commit suicide after a sex change is very high (because often the sex change isn't what they 'wanted' so to speak) so this is kinda a weird issue.

No you're right it is technically a mental illness. And honestly I think the only way to resolve the unfortunate issue of the sex change sometimes making things worse is if we were more accepting of the concept of gender presentation not needing to match gender identity. Because fuck if it's not more complicated than people like to think. The sooner we stop running with the assumption you must adhere to this, this and that traits to be a man/woman, the sooner people will be free to express themselves however they wish without having to change things they might not want to change.

Regardless I hope you can understand what I mean with this. Not saying that transgenders are 'ingrates' or anything. They are just mentally not well and need help to fix that.

They do it's a very unfortunate situation.

Oh lord, you have a life full of suffering. Self-pity is a wonderful thing isn't it. Everyone has issues. Again, get over it. I don't see a 'depression pride' anywhere. It's fucking baffling how people think having a parade can fix anything at all. It doesn't fix anything.

It's not about fixing anything. Like I said it's a celebration.

But I've seen you speak on hetero's before and your tone is generally filled with disdain (non intended, I'm sure, as you seem like a relatively nice person otherwise.) so I'd like to ask you to reconsider your stance ever so slightly to compensate for the fact that everyone has issues, not just you.

My disdain has less to do with heterosexual people but rather obtuse people who refuse to be empathetic to the point of view of someone who lives a life from a very different perspective than they do because they aren't heterosexual.

Unfortunately most people who can't look past the fact tend to be heterosexual.

The fact of the matter seems to be that men commit suicide more often, with gay men and straight men making up 3 quarters of the suicide demographic which seems to infer that the main driving factor for suicide is in fact GENDER and not SEXUALITY as you'd like me to believe no?

Those numbers are also missing one key note If you look at the bottom at suicide attempts, while men are more likely to succeed. Women are more likely to attempt. But men tend to go for methods that are quick and efficient, like guns and hangings. So they're much less likely to be saved and taken to a hospital. The chart above the section on suicide attempts shows that firearms make up of almost half of suicides.

So you're not wrong, men are more likely to kill themselves. That alone is correct. But gay youth from ages 10 to 24 Are overall more likely to make an attempt on their lives or think of committing suicide which is also directly linked to events of bullying and abuse.

Your first suggestion seems to infer that you're the most likely group to be killed which is actually not true. It's certainly an aggravating factor though. I like to think people that are in gangs are still more likely to be killed but what do I know.

Gang related murder and crime is it's own can of worms because it's not hate crime related.

The truth of the matter is the worst 'category' to be in right now is Transwomen. They are far more likely to experience hate crimes and death and sexual violence than any other group. Especially if you add race into the mix. Since black transwomen are even more at risk.

And unfortunately hate crimes get worse immediately after laws are placed to protect or give these groups rights to match everyone else. Such as the sudden rise in murders against transwomen (particularly people of color) after a law was enacted to included gender identity in hate crimes

This is unfortunately common seeing as it also happened when same sex marriage was legalized in the US

People don't want the government treating us like people. That's just a fact. They get mad when they afford us the same rights and hate crime status because that means we're being accepted.

I'm not sure on the bisexual thing. If it's true I'd like to know why the factor that they are bisexual specifically makes it more likely. Could be true.

Here's a article addressing the findings about bisexual women and rape/domestic violence

This is something both heterosexual and queer people have an issue with outright. We (generally) are absolutely horrible to bisexual partners. It's most likely due to some very unfortunate and false beliefs about bisexual people causing resentment. A lot of gross beliefs that they're just greedy, they need to 'pick a side', don't even get me started on the 'gold star lesbian' crap (basically you're a gold star lesbian if you've never been with a man).

Arguably, I never said you have nothing to be proud of. But if you are choosing your sexuality (AKA YOUR SEXUAL ACTIVITY) as a thing to be proud of then I would like to ask you why your life is so bad that you have nothing else to be proud of. Ever won a medal? Be proud of that.

I can in fact be proud of both my achievements personally and the fact that I've made it this far as a queer person. Pride isn't really a one or the other. A lot of us have considered suicide, myself included. Is there really anything wrong with celebrating life?

which is true, you should see the tumblr posts that some of these gay-pride/LGBTQ+++ drama queens make stating all hetero's should die, right?

I do see them. And while I'm just as guilty of being mildly frustrated with straight people (Again this is mostly due to ignorance of the fact we are different and that's ok. We don't have to be just like you to be ok.) The idea that they need to die doesn't sit right with me.

Think for a moment about another minority. What other minority gets local parades? I can think of 1. Black people have 'black history month' which arguably is just as stupid as a gay pride. That's all I can think of.

@Vilageidiotx covered this one for me.

Adversity and Pride

@BuddhaThat's not what it is. You can keep ignoring the point of sometimes being openly gay in and of itself is a accomplishment because you don't live in a area where it's even mildly acceptable all you like but it still happens.

I got lucky. Very lucky. I know this. I know I'm privileged to have a family that doesn't care and loves me and was essentially just waiting for me to work it out on my own.

But that's just it. I'm lucky and I still deal with a lot of issues from others and society due to being queer.

That's not even touching on my best friend who's mother denies he's transgendered. Or his partner who's mom is fine with anyone else being queer but them.

So can you kindly stop ignoring the idea that we're celebrating a life we're leading that has been full of suffering but we're still here.

Because not all of us makes it that far. Especially seeing as the amount of abuse and bullying we can suffer (not always but can) makes us far more likely to commit suicide in our youth.

Not to mention we're more likely to be killed. Or how bisexual people are more likely to suffer from domestic abuse.

I could keep going. Hell I can even provide the numbers if you'd like.

We have everything to be proud of. We as a community suffered so much and we fought and we came out stronger.

That's worth celebrating.

Let's B!tch. I feel it's a healthy release for our roleplay annoyances 2.0

@boomlover Curse multiple tabs >:|

Let's B!tch. I feel it's a healthy release for our roleplay annoyances 2.0

Oops wrong thread

Adversity and Pride

It's not though. You're honestly misunderstanding the core reason behind the desire.

You're misunderstanding what gay pride is.

Gay Pride is literally brought about from the fact that we accomplished something purely by surviving. We SUCCEEDED in a world that tolerates us at best and wants us dead at worse. We came out stronger. Better. Uncompromising.

We have something to celebrate because we faced adversity not only all our lives but our entire history.

We as a community fought for our place in the world. We EARNED our pride. With blood. (Literally)

The reason heterosexual people don't have something to be proud of for being heterosexual (they probably have other reasons to be proud but not for their sexual orientation) is because they never had to fight for the right to exist. To live. To love.

You're thinking of pride as a general feel good feeling. I'm proud to be queer. But I'm also proud of my ability to write. My intelligence. My compassion.

Only one of those relates to gay pride. And that's the fact that I've lived, loved, and survived as a queer woman.

THAT is what gay pride is. That is why heterosexual pride is cringy. Because heterosexual people have never suffered for being heterosexual.

Be proud of who you are. Of your accomplishments.

Gay Pride is the pride of the accomplishment of living in a world that for a very long time wanted us dead.