Sleeth

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Grok

In his newly torn and stained suit he'd borrowed, Grok is shown what the number seven looks like as he's sat down at his respective table. He sits up straight in his chair, almost dignified on this cheap plastic throne. "Grok is not the number seven, Grok is Grok! Great conqueror, strongest of the Sharg, Pusher of Carts, Bagger of Groceries!" He declares proudly and very loudly. The little sheet that had questions on it as Greg had told him about was swept to the side.

"Grok only has one question! How many cattle are you prepared to surrender for the chance to be Grok's mate? Grok will also accept chickens for the laying of eggs!" He adds generously, truly a man of mercy. His hands rest on the table, outstretched as he looks her over, unaffected by so called womanly charms!
________

Jane and...?

"Who are you calling a puppet?" The high pitched voice comes. The sound is clearly from Jane, but her lips are hardly moving, and her hardened eyes continue trying to stare a hole through Jonathan.

After the small outburst, Jane herself speaks in her blunt manner. "My sister Janet. I'd appreciate it if you didn't call her a puppet, she's transitioning toa real girl right now." She... demands?

The puppet nods vigorously, 'standing' up to look much more fierce with those cold, glass eyes. "How could you assume my species the first time we meet? I know I'm a little woodier than other girls, but I won't be held back! Also, that was your question."

The puppet looks down at the paper for a few seconds, as if reading the questions. She then slowly turns her head and looks at her controller. "Ahem, I can't read without you."

"My apologies." Jane says, finally breaking the death stare to look down at the paper, which the puppet reads from.

"What is your ideal first date?" Janet says aloud, before looking back up.

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

It's speed dating, there are no normal people.@Dark Cloud

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

@Dark Cloud Meet Us xD

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Jane...?

As Jonathan leans over the table, Jane's hands unfold and slowly she reaches down. There is a click, and her eyes remain locked onto his, never wavering until finally she sets the item on the table.

"Settle down there hot stuff!"

In an impressive feat of ventriloquism, the lookalike puppet speaks up in a high tone, while Jane stares on in her disinterested and serious look. "We know you ain't" Her other hand comes up to controlling the arm of the puppet, which refers to itself. "Man enough for all this, but the night is young. What do you do for a living Jonniboi?"@Dark Cloud

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

I've carefully constructed a woman of epic proportions, fear not... I hope it will be glorious.

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Jane

The businesslike woman looked up as Jonathan sat down, her piercing gaze glancing over his magically procured face, then to his name tag. "Hello, Jonathon." She says, almost suspicious of him. Her voice is low, and each sound meticulously and clearly spoken. "I'll get right to the point Jonathon, I'm only here because my sister says I need to get out, and we need a man around. Do you think you can handle us, Jonathan?"

Her eyes narrow and she leans forward on the table. Her hands fold in front of her and her fingers interlock, her steely gaze unwavering. She's come to seal the deal, and perhaps it was the lack of sweat that challenged her with his lack of fear!

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

@Dark Cloud Jonathon is #9 That suited lady is for you. ;)

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Grok

It had been a few hours, so naturally as the group arrived, Grok had already stained the suit he borrowed with coke. Leading their merry party with enthusiasm was a beer-gutted 40 something known as Greg. His oily red curls were combed back, and his fiery neckbeard was proudly displayed above his floral dress shirt. "Now Grok, do you remember what I told you?" He asks, placing his arm kind of over the larger man's shoulder as they had their names and numbers stuck on them.

Grok nods enthusiastically as the part comes into the room, which is dimly lit and holds an array of tables. Each one has a simple placard with a number on it pertaining to who their initial partner would be, and the men would shift to the right each time. "Yes! Ketchup is a jelly, and the world is not ready to talk about it."

"Wha- No Grok, not that."

"Modern women will never compare to young Betty White!"

With that, Greg let's out a not so quiet whisper. "I told you that in confidence dude!"

"Ah yes!Be confident! Grok remembers!"

"De... Jus- Yes. Look, just nod and don't say anything while I'm working my mojo alright?"
______________

As they headed off to their respective tables, off at table 9, a woman was waiting patiently at her table. She appears to be in her late twenty, with Auburn hair and a women's suit top visible. Next to her is a suitcase, but it seems larger than normal. Her long nails are lightly tapping on it, and she is using her other hand to meticulously make sure the table piece is perfectly centered.

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Will do, my business should be under control now so I'll be more available.

Edit: I can also take on NPC roles of either gender if you'd like. However many you want to dump.

House Of Villains: A Slice Of Life About Comically Self-Aware Villains

Grok

Grok has spent his day of waiting in front of the television, his borrowed suit already stained with coke as he eats a large bowl of scrambled eggs. "I do not understand, why does the Jerry not kill the Tom? Perhaps he is immortal! Truly a fearsome foe." He comments in his expert opinion, lifting the wooden spoon up to his waiting mouth as the others prepare.

When Jill comes out, Grok looks at her suspiciously, his eyes scanning her up and down. "Why does the Jill not take on this appearanceduring interviews? Perhaps not upsetting all spawn who see you would help. Grok too was told not to scare the young. He helpfully blurts out, before yanking another bottle cap from a coke. It appeared over the past years that a near indestructible body could fight the evils of high fructose corn syrup, and the fizzy drink represented much of his diet.

So, with a coke in one hand and a mixing bowl of eggs in the other, he looks back and forth between his bony roommates. "And the Jill cannot be a Sorcerer, she does not wear a hat. All Sorcerers wear hats."

@Dark Cloud@Zanavy