A lot of ways to say it, wasn't there? Somehow being told she loved him, while being told that she, essentially wanted to keep him safe was oddly comforting. Yet it wasn't what he wanted.
Did she honestly think he was just going to say, sure, I'll just let you go? No. She didn't, and part of him wondered if she chose this way of telling him in the hopes that he would see how much it hurt her, to tell him this.
He did see it. It pained him, and he couldn't make himself try to comfort him. He understood it would be worse if he did. "I do understand" he said softly, because he did. "You fear that you will ruin me, when all you have done so far is make me a better man. You fear that because I love you, I'll get hurt. Everyone risks that. But I know you think that that hurt could be death. I understand that. I can, and do protect myself. You think I don't know, that I don't understand. That I don't know that Ben is probably dead, due to Anthony but you think that it's your fault. when it isn't. You tell me you love me, and then that I can't follow you. When we both know that I will. Because, Damn it, I need you. You think I dont, that all I needed was a little confidence booster. Maybe that's so. I need you. You expect me to just agree, and walk away. But I'm not your parents, and im definetely not your grandmother, or whoever else has left you and made you feel like nothing. So you can leave. But I will follow."
The words just tumbled out, unchecked, and he was shocked at tears stinging his own eyes. He couldn't remember the last time he had cried. He must have been a kid. And it was probably for something foolish. There was pain in his chest, and irrational fear, panic. Because he feared she might ask, instead of tell. And he didn't know if he could resist that.
He took a step forward, just acting on instinct now, he gently removed her hands from her face. "Please"
****
Kalinda shook her head "I'm not cute. And you are an idiot. What's to stop me from going to Wayne, and telling him? You can't use Griffin and Zack against me, since you will just hurt them either way. You are efficient in the use of their abilities-your baby bird type flying yesterday proves that. In fact, I might just go to Wayne now"
She slid into the shadows chuckling.
****
Phoebe nodded and smiled "sure" she said, taking their trays and putting them ontop of a bin, before unlocking the wheelchairs breaks, and pushing the wheelchair outside.