@User

Clark listened to him talk about adventures and he definitely agreed with the fellow, it seemed that both of them had the same perspective about things.

He shook his head as he heard, "You will kiss the girl and get married", even had he become famous through war though he didn't envy being chained to a spot by a woman, even if she was remarkably beautiful.

Then he heard about the man who became god and was eaten for failing the trial by fire. A poor fate for the fellow indeed, Clark thought.

"Oh, yeah I still take jobs, especially since I just finished my last job and I haven't been able to find work since." He said in answer to ?

Crap, he shook his head in disgust with himself, "Uhh, sorry I haven't got your name yet. I was wondering if I could have that pleasure. Also my name is clark." He said as he offered his hand for a friendly handshake.

@Pripovednik "Keeper, your coin."

Geoff nodded his thanks to the surprisingly honest customer, before turning his glare on the young quartering who was already scurrying off across the room, trying to overcharge a customer for a glass off low-quality wine. Again.

He'd warned the girl before of trying such tricks while he was around, but for some reason the rapscallion kept at it. It was almost as if she enjoyed the gruff old warmage sparking her backside raw every time he caught her, and Geoff began to wonder what other ways he could use to discipline the wayward wench instead. A riding crop perhaps..?

@Gareth

"You're to take three coppers for that wine, my lass, and not a penny more," the barman called across the room, watching carefully as the girl tried to snatch a silver from their guest before he noticed his mistake.

"I'm sorry about that confusion, my love," Hilda said to Clark with a mischievous grin and tossed seven coppers down onto the table as change, leaning in close to his ear as she did, "Perhaps you'd like to meet me in the barn a little later, and we can discuss how apologetic I am in a more... intimate setting..." leaving the offer hanging in the air Hilda quickly turned away from the table, and sticking her tongue out at the old barman rudely went about her duties clearing away the empties mugs, glasses tankards and bucket.

Picking away at the assortment of meats on the plate in front of him, Elderi offered the Goddess a rather succulent looking slice.
"Would you care for any?"
The meat reminded him of the wild boars he would fight in the arena, the blood dry but not cooked too much.

The dancing rock-muncher bumped into Elderi, and so she spun him around and pushed him toward the corner.

@Genni

"Would you care for any?"

Leaning in closer Astrape seductively sucked the slice of meat into her mouth, Elderi's fingers along with it as she playfully teased them for a moment with her tongue before pulling away again. "Mmm, delicious..." She moaned with satisfaction, staring deep into the warrior's eyes as she slowly chewed the meat and swallowed, licking her lips clean of the juices.

Suddenly her eyes froze, her expression dropping as if something was wrong. A look of confusion flashed across her face and her cheeks turned purple as orange spots began to form across them. Reaching her hands up Astrape noticed her cleavage was rapidly expanding, the seams of her dress ripping and tearing as the flesh within swelled well beyond their ability to hold them back. Looking up at Elderi with horror Astrape opened her mouth, "Um..." She muttered before suddenly exploding in a blinding flash of light...

...

...A moment later there was a thunderclap and a woman who looked almost identical to Astrape, but without the glow of arcing electricity pulsing around her, suddenly appeared in the middle of the room. "Who the hell gave my sister Klarackian Whale Meat!?!" Bronte screamed, loud enough to make the whole building quiver to its foundations. With a wave of her hand Bronte quickly reconstituted Astrape, whose body flew back together from the scrapes which a moment before had been plastered over the walls, ceiling and other customers around the bar.

For a moment Astrape simply stood there, slightly dazed from her experience, before realising that while her body may have been restored her clothes most certainly hadn't been. Giving out an embarrassed squeal the lightning goddess dove over the counter, hiding her naked body from the onlookers as she cringed amongst the dirty glasses and empty bottles. "Could you please get me something to wear?" She called out to anyone who could help her out, her hand waving up over the edge of the bar top.

@User

Clark listened to him talk about adventures and he definitely agreed with the fellow, it seemed that both of them had the same perspective about things.

He shook his head as he heard, "You will kiss the girl and get married", even had he become famous through war though he didn't envy being chained to a spot by a woman, even if she was remarkably beautiful.

Then he heard about the man who became god and was eaten for failing the trial by fire. A poor fate for the fellow indeed, Clark thought.

"Oh, yeah I still take jobs, especially since I just finished my last job and I haven't been able to find work since." He said in answer to ?

Crap, he shook his head in disgust with himself, "Uhh, sorry I haven't got your name yet. I was wondering if I could have that pleasure. Also my name is clark." He said as he offered his hand for a friendly handshake.

Holding out his hand he flashed a perfect grin. "Sir Charles Richardson. I am one of the few people from the great crystel court who wast shot." he sat back "And I may need a companion or two to help me travle the world" sitting forwards "You interested? Pay isnt the best but its the sight of the world"

"What in the hells-" yelled Thasseldar after yet another, slimy and suspiciously colored thing slapped over his head, making a rather disgusting looking hood. Whatever else he would say was drowned out by the thundering voice of (Bronte). The hood-like part slid over his head as it flew back to (Astrape), while he looked on in confusion.

"Madhouse..." he muttered, turning back to the bar. He signaled to the bartender. "I'll have one more..." although it may not be the best idea - things became stranger and stranger as he kept drinking the stuff. He pulled out the last of his current supply of coins.

Suddenly the door explodes inward and immediately after you hear a voice say "hmm still have not fixed that random explosion problem well as they say back to the drawing board." and in comes in a rather broad fellow wearing a strange white coat who sits down and not looking ashamed at all asks "Got any fog-apple extract." (a fairly rare type of spirit that requires a rare type of apple only found in the Misty isles it is said even the scent of a bottle can get you drunk)

Elderi fell off his chair. Now, Elderi liked to think of this a rare occurrence. He usually held his balance as well as a tightrope walker.

It wasn't the fact that she's sucked his fingers, because while it looked very sensual he felt nothing. His arms being nervously masses and all. It was slightly due to the explosion, the thunderclap and the equally gorgeous figure that appeared out of thin air. Oh and the resurrection. That freaked him out.

But most of all it was the nakedness. Now, don't get me wrong, Elderi was a hit with the ladies. By the Three Highs he was! But he had never seen the naked body of a goddess before, not to mention the way particular parts surged with crackling energy.

Picking himself off the ground Elderis patted himself down, worried for some reason that perhaps his muscularity had disappeared, it hadn't - he was still buff.

Elderis arms flew out over the counter and picked up Astrape. In a cacoon of metal sheets, to protect her pride, he lifted her up and onto his lap.

"Shall I take you outside? Or put you in a room, so that I can go find some clothes. I suspect I can make some fine garments if I were just to find the right components from outside. It is up to you my lady."
@Genni

Clark grinned he shook hands with his new friend, "Sir Charles Richardson, I'll cut my price to a quarter of the original, because seeing more of the world with a friend is definitely a worthwhile pursuit."

Clark turned around and was surprised to find that Hilda was sorry for the cheap wine and that he was refunded seventy percent of what he had offered to pay.

Then he heard her offer of the barn and he smiled shyly, he might take her up on her offer, she had very, very pretty eyes.

Then something fell on him out of nowhere and he took the disgusting part of whatever the hell it was and threw it in the corner to get it out of his sight. He then heard someone yell but he didn't pay attention much to it, because he hated people yelling so much that not only did he ignore it he decided to leave.

Turning to Richardson, he asked, "Want to take a walk and see the neighbourhood around this shack with me?"

@Gareth"Sure. Ill grab my gun"

"Shall I take you outside? Or put you in a room, so that I can go find some clothes. I suspect I can make some fine garments if I were just to find the right components from outside. It is up to you my lady."

Fluttering her eyelashes up at her handsome metallic new friend Astrape sent a surge of current out through her skin, letting it ripple through the metal sheets enveloping her naked body. "I think getting a room would be a good idea, and we might not need the garments all too soon either."

"Oh no you don't!" Bellowed Bronte as she stomped across the room. Even though the two girls looked almost identical, mirror images of each other even, Bronte's fierce and boisterous nature seemed nothing like Astrape's more fluid and mercurial one. They certainly couldn't be confused for one another, that's for sure, even without Astrape's flickering light show eyes.

"Do you know how much trouble you've gotten us into?" Bronte howled, her voice a gale in suddenly cramped feeling room. "We were supposed to be working together to build the perfect storm to celebrate Dad's wedding day, and here you are shutting around with some tavern riff-raff..." Breaking off for a moment Brinte turned to Elderi with a less than flattering smile, "No offense meant, I'm sure you're a lovely man once people get to know you," she said at a far more reasonable volume, and an almost human tone, before swinging back around to her sister once more, "...naked as the day you were begotten, and eating food that you know you're allergic to!"

With a sheepish smile Astrape looked up at Elderi. Shifting in his lap a little in a way which helped her well-toned buttocks press against parts of him which had best be left undescribed. "I'm sorry about my sister. She tends to be a bit of a windbag. What she really needs is a good hard fu..."

Before she could finish what she was saying Bronte's hand quickly clamped over her twins mouth, tight enough to ensure not one more syllable could escape. For a moment Bronte stood there, her face ripening and mouth flapping open and closed as she tried to think of something to say to the complete stranger cuddling up to her sister's naked body.

@Genni

"My apologies for having you come here in such a manner. I have taken fondly to your sister, and swear i had knowledge of her condition with such meats."

With a low screech and loud clank astrape now wore a steel breastplate and chainmail skirt. With his hands free he took Astrapes sisters hand in his and bowed.

"Is there anyway I could possibly repay your inconvience?" As Elderi spoke these words a very distinctive and raw image appeared in his head 'a good hard fu..'. This image was not fast to leave his mind as it then became an idea - before Elderi knew what was happened it snuck its way delicately into his voice.

"Perhaps we can all three of us find a room and discuss this? I can have food and drink sent up?"

@ArenaSnow "I'll have one more..."

Stepping over towards Thasseldar Geoff noticed his morphic cloak slipping a little, his true self showing through in flickering intervals as the toxic beverage slowly worked it way into what passed for the realmswalker's body. Picking up the customer's mug with a smile the barman noted the way the man was carefully counting out his coins, obviously running low on funds. "I'm afraid this'll have to be your last one," Geoff said with a heavy sigh, more concerned with the state of the customer's purse than with his health. "Unless you can show me you're good for another round, of course."

With a quick swipe of his hand Geoff quickly pocketed the money, not bothering to check for exact change as he turned his gaze over to the two divine sisters currently fighting over the metallic warrior sitting at the bar. Gently his hand reached out and took hold of his stave, things were beginning to look a little heated with the threesome and Geoff had his reputation with the brewery to consider. He needed to make sure he kept a clean, family-friendly pub otherwise his dream of a carvery would go up in smoke.

@Pripovednik@Genni

"If you three would like to rent a room, I charge 10 gold for a night, or 1 gold for an hour, depending on what you'll be needing it for..." Geoff smirked and gave Elderi a knowing wink, hoping the metal man understood his meaning. "Perhaps you'd like to purchase some prophylactics while you're at it? I carry a wide and varied stock,¹ and I'm sure you'll find something to both yours and the ladies' liking."

Suddenly the door explodes inward and immediately after you hear a voice say "hmm still have not fixed that random explosion problem well as they say back to the drawing board." and in comes in a rather broad fellow wearing a strange white coat who sits down and not looking ashamed at all asks "Got any fog-apple extract." (a fairly rare type of spirit that requires a rare type of apple only found in the Misty isles it is said even the scent of a bottle can get you drunk)

Quickly waving his stave towards the pile of woodchips which used to be his front door, Geoff quickly reassembled the entranceway back to its former... well, let's say 'glory', for lack of a better word. Stepping up in front of the stranger Geoff lay his staver down pointedly on the counter in front of him. "First of all, that'll be three silver for the door. I've already had to use up more magical charges from this thing doing repairs tonight than usual, and recharging doesn't come for free," He said, his tone dark and brooding, and also lying. The stave had been charged in the middle of an eldritch battle twixt daemonic forces beyond the ken of know-less-men on the eve of a rising blood moon eclipse during a cosmic alignment which would not occur again for another ten thousand years, and was good for at least another couple of years of constant use.

"Secondly, what vintage would you prefer for the fog-apple extract? I have the three-year, five-year, nineteen-year and minus-two-year² in stock." As he spoke Geoff reached over to the back of the bar, pulling out a small tumbler which he quickly filled half-full³ with frozen ice cubes from the mouth of a baby ice drake he kept next to the sink.

The man takes off his hat and you see a human white male who despite the absolute cleanliness of his clothing face hands and any exposed skin is absolutely dirty but through the dirt you see a fairly handsome face with sevral scars. The man reaches into a pouch on his waist and pulls out three sliver balls "i would like a bottle of minus two by the way" the man takes on a salesmen like posture and pulls out several vial and coats like the one he is wearing in various colors "would you like to buy a Dirt proof coat" he splashes the first vial on his own coat "It works with blood" th blood slides right off the coat onto the floor the same happens to each vial even acid which makes a small hole in the floor "only 10 druma1 and yes it is fire proof i just lost my vial of liquid fire2 during re-entry" surprisingly enough the roof of the bar starts on fire3.

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1. The misty Druma is the main currency of the misty isles it looks like a ball of various metals depending on the value basicly it goes like this copper equals 1 Druma bronze equals 5 sliver equals 50 gold equals 100 and platinum equals 1000.

2. A rare chemical from once again the "abandoned" misty isles as its name suggests it catch anything it touchs on fire.

3. The Avery Vanderson inventing company denies any responsibility in this event.

"i would like a bottle of minus two by the way, would you like to buy a Dirt proof coat It works with blood only 10 druma1 and yes it is fire proof i just lost my vial of liquid fire2 during re-entry"

surprisingly enough the roof of the bar starts on fire3.

Scooping up the balls in his hand Geoff inspected them carefully for a second. They seemed genuine silver, and if anything weighed a little more than a normal coin. With a shrug he quickly pocketed them and reached towards the back shelf of the bar where he kept the 'good' stuff. "It'll be three gold for the fog-apple extract. I would charge less, but this stuff is as rare as a virgin in a Ecospathian orgy and I ca't let it go for any cheaper than that. And I'll have to turn you down with the coat, what's the point of spilling blood if it's not going to soak in a little..."

Just then an all too familiar scent caught Geoff's nose. Quickly spinning round he spotted the flames spreading across the ceiling, "Oh Fuchs,¹ don't tell me I'm going to have to summon Her again!" Carefully placing the rare bottle of fog-apple extract back in place Geoff snapped up the baby ice drake by its neck, almost causing its eyes to pop out in surprise. Hoisting the beast up under his arm Geoff squeezed its belly tightly as he yanked the drake's mouth around to face the fire.

The cone of super-cooled air shot from the beast's gaping jaws, a horrific burp of chilled gases bursting out and rolling over the flames, quickly extinguishing them while decorating the ceiling with the dazzling display of bifurcating ice crystals. Carefully lowering the baby ice drake back beside the sink, giving its head a little pat as way of thanks, Geoff rounded on his new guest with fury burning in his eyes. "That'll be another silver for the ceiling, and a copper for that hole in the floor you thought I'd missed."

The man looking at the ceiling "hmm i could have sworn that that fell out over the great daemon gate" looking back down the man pulls from the pouch three gold, one sliver and a bronze while saying "perhaps we got off on the wrong foot my name is Avery Vanderson of the Avery Vanderson inventing company and the reason i am so dirty is from the fact i just crash landed rolled across the road through a pile of ash hit a rock flew over a pedestal which had an orb on it and landed next to it by the way would you like some moondust1 not the drug kind2 the potion type i have have a literal ton of it from the my craft."
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1. A base for many powerful potions and ingredient of a few alcoholic beverages once again rare.

2. A powerful mind affecting drug deadens the nerves and makes people who use it more violent.

@hiddenleafguy "...flew over a pedestal which had an orb on it and landed next to it by the way would you like some moondust1 not the drug kind2 the potion type i have have a literal ton of it from the my craft."

As he picked up the metal orbs Geoff froze in place hearing Avery say the words 'pedestal' and 'orb' in the same sentence. Carefully tilting his head up, not wanting to make any sudden movements for fear of what may be yet to come, Geoff looked the madman straight in the eye and very clearly asked, "This is very important, did you knock the orb of the pedestal, or was it still on there after you landed?"

While Geoff was talking Avery was pulling a small orb made of glass1 from his bag "No i did not knock the orb off and no i am not a madman" Avery stops thinking for a moment "or maybe i am but as they say all inventors are half mad half brilliant2"
__________________________
1. Anyone who is well versed in divination would recognize it as a mind seeing orb made by a most likely insane wizard who's last recorded project was using magic to go to the moon.

2. A quote made by a mad scientist after turning the entire storm empire into talking goats.

@hiddenleafguy

Hanging his head Geoff let out a deep sigh of utter relief. If Nerys had escaped there'd be no telling how much damage she could've done before being rounded up. THe last time she got out it had taken almost a week of trawling through the local swamp before Geoff had finally managed to corner her and trap her once more, and then he'd had to deal with the twenty-six kids she'd managed to spawn with the impressionable young locals in the meantime...

With a shudder Geoff tried not to think about it, and he began to turn away to fetch Avery's drink for him, only to catch sight of the orb the madman 'honourable guest' was holding in his hand. "Hey, where did you get my dad's¹ Mind Seeing Orb from? I thought he'd lost that when his quest to enslave the minds of the Merpeople of Atlanta and turn them into his loyal army failed. I tried to explain to him that Atlanta wasn't underwater, but you know crazy people... err, what I meant to say was..." The giant half-troll quickly rumbled to a stop, realising there was no way to pull his foot back out of his mouth fast enough.

"Well long story full of amazing invention, thrilling, random explosions, war and space short i found it on the moon in a temple guarded by goat guards do you want it? If you do i only have one request, buy one of my inventions, there are many good ones like a rocket ship maybe a inter-dimensional radio oh what about a matter teleporter.1"
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1. The Avery Vanderson inventing company claims no responsibility for any lost hair fingers or other small body parts.