Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Zelosse
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Zelosse The Entity

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@TheWindel my only intended edits are adding a pic of the moth wings so yes.
Hidden 5 yrs ago 5 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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@Zelosse I don't see any complaints with this CS. Other then being a bit sparse - it looks good on my part. Unless you're still editing it that is...
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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TheWendil The Wendil-Sama™ / ಠ_ಠ

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@Zelosse

Your Background section could do with some clean-up in format and grammar. I would also like to see some more info in it. Maybe add more about her becoming a hellmoth and what that means exactly. The rest of your CS looks acceptable, if a bit short so consider adding more detail in that as well.
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Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by XoXKieroBombXoX
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Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Flood
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Flood Cyber-Phantasy Knight

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@Zelosse

Your CS still feels very sparse, just by my standards. Consider telling a story about why they became a Hellmoth, why their flight suit looks the way it does. As things stand, the background just looks very insubstantial.

@XoXKieroBombXoX

Your CS looks good to go by my standards, I appreciate including a sample post despite not having asked for it. Wait on Windel and Lmpkio.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by XoXKieroBombXoX
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@XoXKieroBombXoX

Your CS looks good to go by my standards, I appreciate including a sample post despite not having asked for it. Wait on Windel and Lmpkio.


Thank you!
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Zelosse
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Added some extra bits to her backstory as requested.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Flood
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@Zelosse

No further objections from me.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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@XoXKieroBombXoX I do not see any problems with this profile. It looks good to me.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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TheWendil The Wendil-Sama™ / ಠ_ಠ

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@Zelosse

Overall your CS is fine, but do pay heed to missing word breaks and some awkward grammar in your posts. Accepted. Place her in the Character Tab and post when you can.

@XoXKieroBombXoX

Accepted; just be wary of breaking up your paragraphs in IC. Place him in the Character Tab and post when you can.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by XoXKieroBombXoX
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@TheWindel Sorry. I'm so used to MLA format. I'll break paragraphs up.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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@XoXKieroBombXoX

Apologies if it sounds a little out of place for me to say so, but the way you wrote your post can potentially lead to confusion in the future.

Using would to indicate the actions your character took instead of the past tense makes everything seem like he could or couldn't do what's described, since that's a word most commonly used for open ended actions.

That could make interactions with him hard, if no one knows for sure whether or not he really did an action.

That's just an opinion, but perhaps using the past tense will make your posts clearer in the future.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by XoXKieroBombXoX
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@KoL
Let me see if I can fix that. Thanks for letting me know.
Hidden 5 yrs ago 5 yrs ago Post by Animal
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Animal

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@TheWindel Also, I have a friend who is interested in joining and wanted to know if he is allowed to have a mech suit?
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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@Animal

Your CS looks fine enough to me, however I'd like to bring this point up to both you and everyone else in the RP. We seem to be getting a lot of misconstruction lately so I'll remind everyone now that this is still a monster girl RP. That means your monster's true form need to resemble giant monster girls. I'm willing to let you keep the Beast Form @Animal the same as I let @Crimson Raven keep theirs, but they need to have a proper GMG form. This isn't a monster RP, but a monster girl one.

As for your question, your friend is free to join. We do have one player currently using a full on mecha for their character on the basis that mechas are experimental weapons and not universal at the moment. But seeing as that player is currently busy at the moment, I'm willing to let your friend take their place so long as they know their mecha will be a prototype, experimental, and probably the only one of its kind in the RP, not counting the first player. Unless, by "mech suit", they mean something smaller and more mobile?
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Animal
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@TheWindel

Could this work as a giant monster girl form then?


Also thanks for answering, it was exactly what he wanted to know and is working on the CS now.
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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@Animal

That works good. Place it into your CS and wait for the other GMs to look over it.
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Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Flood
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Flood Cyber-Phantasy Knight

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@Animal

I see no immediate issues. Accepted.
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Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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@Animal Same as @Flood - Accepted on my half.
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Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Claw2k11
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Claw2k11 The Eternally Tired Reaper

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