Hidden 3 mos ago Post by Taka
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Taka The Last Son of Vegeta

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Rejected, even without the history section. The equipment alone is trying to introduce a lot of world building elements into an established setting without having asked any of the GMs first. Neither of those swords fit, especially not whatever's going on about the "flames of the planet".

And the first one, as an example of elven craftsmanship, is just dismal, even if we're somehow willing to overlook the ordering going on where he apparently joined some other random order after joining the IR and relying on them to get his armour. Which apparently precedes having decent weapons.

Seriously, ask questions before trying to write in new even more exclusive groups with ancient weapons.


Sure. I'll rewrite it. But he was supposed to be posted last year. Alot happened last year and I didn't post the backstory cause he was supposed to be Fanilly's former teacher of swordsmanship but, wanted to ask first since things definitely could've changed.
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by The Otter
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chat is this a bit
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by Taka
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chat is this a bit


Possibly. I mean..I can...show the conversation that was had with Vita.
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by The Otter
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<Snipped quote by The Otter>

Possibly. I mean..I can...show the conversation that was had with Vita.


are you sure that will end well for you
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by Taka
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<Snipped quote by Taka>

are you sure that will end well for you


I don't why you being snarky to me when I haven't done anything to you or anyone. I'm compliant with needing to change and any changes from my last conversation with the GM.
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by VitaVitaAR
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@Taka: I asked for you to heavily discuss it with me to hash out any details, and you never really did.

I wanted to see you actually write up the backstory before you moved forward with anything approaching this idea, because it's crucial to actually make it make sense with already-established characters and Fanilly's character and backstory as well.

This, too, you never really did.

There was a reason I wanted this, so I could look at what you had in mind and detail and tell you what did or didn't work, especially since he would be one of multiple characters involved in Fanilly's training. One of her trainers already exists in the RP, so you'd need to be coordinated with that to work.

There's also stuff here you didn't mention to me, which is why I wanted you to give me a more completed bio to look at and talk about.
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by Taka
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@Taka: I asked for you to heavily discuss it with me to hash out any details, and you never really did.

I wanted to see you actually write up the backstory before you moved forward with anything approaching this idea, because it's crucial to actually make it make sense with already-established characters and Fanilly's character and backstory as well.

This, too, you never really did.

There was a reason I wanted this, so I could look at what you had in mind and detail and tell you what did or didn't work, especially since he would be one of multiple characters involved in Fanilly's training. One of her trainers already exists in the RP, so you'd need to be coordinated with that to work.

There's also stuff here you didn't mention to me, which is why I wanted you to give me a more completed bio to look at and talk about.


I...agree. That's why I didn't do that backstory yet. I wanted to ask first. I only posted what I had completed to show that I had something unlike the last time we talked. I had planned to message after work which just so happens to be now. So that I had the okay to still make the backstory or else I'd just write something different.
Hidden 3 mos ago Post by VitaVitaAR
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@Taka: I wanted a draft or at least the details of a whole bio, because I already see some things that don't really work here.

For one thing, he's fairly directly copied from a canon character, which I have to say I'm really not a fan of for original setting RPs and especially ones taking place in a setting I've worked on for so long.

This character as he's currently written simply doesn't work in this RP.
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by Chronic
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May I join?_@VitaVitaAR
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by VitaVitaAR
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@Chronic: I'm going to have to see your intended character concept first.
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by Chronic
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It’s almost done
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by VitaVitaAR
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@Chronic: Then we'll see when it's done.
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by Chronic
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I most likely won’t do a picture because I’m on iPhone btw@VitaVitaAR
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by VitaVitaAR
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@Chronic: That's fine if you can do a sufficient description.
Hidden 2 mos ago 2 mos ago Post by Chronic
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Name: Bellamy Delaney
Age: 23
Gender:Male
Race: Human
Appearance: 6 foot 2, well defined physique, scar on left hand,

Personality:A bit childish but the good kind, cautious, sarcastic,
Brief Backstory:born in Velt raised in a small cottage on the outskirts of the dwarf city
Equipment:
Skills:
Hidden 2 mos ago Post by Chronic
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Not the full CS I’ll do the rest tomorrow
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