After Ezuri you posted the tree assignment... but did the other genin post already?

Review about Niji & Kumogatarui, maybe? Someone?

Sorry guys for the absence, I've been... busy.

AlterNathan said
After Ezuri you posted the tree assignment... but did the other genin post already?

Nope, but over 5 days had passed so I decided to move on regardless. We're not letting a single inactive player drag the entire team down.

Any takers for my second acceptance review?
http://www.roleplayerguild.com/topics/15895/posts/ooc?page=16#post-501317

I changed Kato's age from 14 to 15.5 to match with the time skip. I forgot to do that so I should probably get around to doing that.
I also intend to add Genkei into Kato's history but I won't do that until we officially have 2 separate rosters, one for the guild and another for the backup site.

I accept it Nicias ^^

Name:Shiro Konton
Nickname/Alias: Shiro
Gender: Female
Age and date of birth:13
Age Appearance: 16
Sexuality: Bisexual

Parents:

• Tamekaze Konton (Father - MIA)


• Sheiko Konton (Mother - MIA)

Length and build 144.5 cm Average
Weight35kg
Favorite weather and season Rain and Autumn



Village: Kirigakure
Birthplace: Kirigakure
Organization: Kirigakure

Clan/Bloodline: Konton
Rank: Genin

Chakra Nature:

Ketsu (Blood Release)



Appearance:




Personality:
One could liken Shiro to a Masochist, possibly because she doesn't mind cutting herself and using her abilities in a reckless way. Shiro would shrug and agree as she has little regard for the thoughts of others, she just wants to get the job done as quick as possible.

Shiro's sadistic, masochist and bloodlust attitude could come from her clan's kekkei genkai, due to it needing the use of the users own blood in order to be used.

Shiro can be a real handful in general and enjoys winding people up and getting on people's nerves. She can however be an excellent team mate when you can get over her aggressive personality. She will grudgingly come to the aid of her teammates but will show no sympathy if they get in her way.



History:

Shiro comes from the aggressive and rather withdrawn Konton clan. A clan that posseses the powerfiul blood release blood line. It has given the known users of it infamy when used in battle due to its high cost but great impact on the battlefield.

Shiro was young when she was told that her parents had disapeard. Shiro knew her parents as being devoted clan members who kept many secrets about her clans hidden past.

Why they kept these secrets Shiro did not know. Shiro had no family members to look after her as none of the Konton clan reside in their village of origin. This is something that Shiro still searches for the answer for as well of of course, the location of her parents.

Theme Song:



Weapons/Items:



Skills/Abilities

• Skilled Taijutsu


• Good Chakra Control


• Skilled Kusarigamajutsu


• Weak Genjutsu


• Average Ninjutsu


• Strong Close Combatant

Special Traits

• High Pain Threshold


• Blood Thirsty


• Regains lost blood while she sleeps

Kekkei Genkai:

Name of Kekkei Genkai: Ketsu (Blood Release)
Clan: Konton
Description: The Konton clan are well known for their ability to warp their own blood into tools while in battle. A great battle was once won by one man as the more they cut into him the more blood they gave him to work with. Sadly he did not live to tell the tale of his victory.

Blood release allows the owner to control their own blood to a degree of making it boil, explode, or harden. They can only control their own blood and of other clan members. Owners of the Ketsu blood line are granted the ability to create red blood cells seemingly from nowhere when they sleep.

Most clan members are afflicted with the curse of blood lust while in battle causing them to dip more and more into their limited supply of blood. Due to the sacrificial nature of Blood Release most of the Konton clan have died, due to bleeding to death.



Jutsu:




Custom Jutsu



Summons

None

@Nytefall

Think I know you?
At any rate, my review :

1. ) We don't use the chakra or any kind of pills. They are a bit of broken in fights as they prolong it and thus are deemed to be something we shouldn't use.
2. ) The traits are off. Starting genins are fresh genins from the Academy. Its also not possible to make them start with above average chakra reserves and a good chakra control. For an experienced chuunin that would be possible, but not for a genin.
3. ) Am not sure about the Kekkei Genkei. Think that hardening and using blood can be interesting, but I will remain neutral over that for now.
4.) I would like to suggest to read the rules. The rank of a genin is that they can start with Two C ranked Jutsu and four D ranked jutsu. I shall review the jutsu once you have made the changes in that section.

- Gero.

http://www.roleplayerguild.com/topics/15895/posts/ooc?page=16#post-510923

Re-review please? The changes Gero asked for were done :3

I will post for my other chars after dinner.

Gerontis said
@NytefallThink I know you?At any rate, my review :1. ) We don't use the chakra or any kind of pills. They are a bit of broken in fights as they prolong it and thus are deemed to be something we shouldn't use.2. ) The traits are off. Starting genins are fresh genins from the Academy. Its also not possible to make them start with above average chakra reserves and a good chakra control. For an experienced chuunin that would be possible, but not for a genin.3. ) Am not sure about the Kekkei Genkei. Think that hardening and using blood can be interesting, but I will remain neutral over that for now.4.) I would like to suggest to read the rules. The rank of a genin is that they can start with Two C ranked Jutsu and four D ranked jutsu. I shall review the jutsu once you have made the changes in that section.- Gero.

Okay i understand that, i can rework the jutsus. and the other bits, as for pills they are mainly used in battle to ensure she doesn't die from blood loss, however i can take them out or limit their use to out of battle or during training as well as the amount she carries.

Done some edits. Please review ty :)

http://www.roleplayerguild.com/topics/15895/posts/ooc?page=19#post-564646

Nytefall, this is my review.

I think you forgot a section. You placed skills and traits together. Am not sure if you noticed, but the CS has two different sections now. Skills and traits. Please see some other CS's if you've having doubts what is correct and what not. Other than that, I am actually going to say I am again a Blood Release Kekkei Genkei. Not because I am against the idea, but the way to balance it is a hassle.

That and I find most of your jutsu not really C or D ranked. A D ranked jutsu that enables somebody's blood to melt through metal? To be fair, that would mean its highly corrosive or has a very high heat/temprature to melt through metal. If you would apply that to skin and bone, it would burn right through it. Faster than you would likely imagine. I would suggest to heavily tone the jutsu down. As for the regaining blood while sleeping? I am very against that. Blood that can be used for several things and then be regained like that is not really acceptable in my book. I would suggest to consider why she would need such a release. As I always suggest to newcomers : Think for what purposes you want to use the KG. Only for combat uses? Then better not use it. It will become something dull as you can't really use it for character development and on the long run, it will become not a character you'll enjoy to the max.

But that is my review as a Sub GM.

So, you do have to join another site if you want to join this?

Asura said
So, you do have to join another site if you want to join this?

Nope. It is only recommended because if the guild goes down we enjoy being able to stay connected on a backup site. You don't need to join any other site other then this one to participate in the RP.

Little Alice said
Nytefall, this is my review.I think you forgot a section. You placed skills and traits together. Am not sure if you noticed, but the CS has two different sections now. Skills and traits. Please see some other CS's if you've having doubts what is correct and what not. Other than that, I am actually going to say I am again a Blood Release Kekkei Genkei. Not because I am against the idea, but the way to balance it is a hassle.That and I find most of your jutsu not really C or D ranked. A D ranked jutsu that enables somebody's blood to melt through metal? To be fair, that would mean its highly corrosive or has a very high heat/temprature to melt through metal. If you would apply that to skin and bone, it would burn right through it. Faster than you would likely imagine. I would suggest to heavily tone the jutsu down. As for the regaining blood while sleeping? I am very against that. Blood that can be used for several things and then be regained like that is not really acceptable in my book. I would suggest to consider why she would need such a release. As I always suggest to newcomers : Think for what purposes you want to use the KG. Only for combat uses? Then better not use it. It will become something dull as you can't really use it for character development and on the long run, it will become not a character you'll enjoy to the max.But that is my review as a Sub GM.

I understand you concern. However the hardening of her blood as more than just combat uses. For example reinforcing structures helping injured team mates, Creating short bridges. I have removed the acid like blood as i can agree that is quite overpowered. I will be touching up the CS a bit here and there. Consider it still being working on as I would like to see what other GMs make of it and suggestion they have.

whelp... here i go ><


Name: Arashi Hayato
Nickname/Alias: The silent leech
Gender: male
Age and date of birth: 13, , ,02/01/461
Age Appearance: looks about 17/18
Sexuality: bi

Parents: Kina "Eta" Odayaka and Omashu "Eta" Ikari, Died of unknown cause
Length and build: about 6'6" and appears scrawny, but is actually very muscular.
Weight: 140lbs
Favorite weather and season: Arashi loves the gentle rains, and is particularly fond of the time between spring and summer where it rains in such a fashion



Village: Kirigakure
Birthplace: Kirigakure
Organization: (not entirely sure of what this is lol)

Clan/Bloodline: Eta

Rank: Genin

Chakra Nature: Water



Appearance:
(without the guns and hat, wears ninja bandana around neck)




Personality: Arashi is quiet and slow to anger, but fiercely protective of friends family and clan. When meeting new people, Arashi is generally shy and takes a bit to open up to them, but Once he does he becomes a loyal friend and will always come to aid when needed. Although slow to anger, Arashi went into an uncontrollable rage once when a friend was killed in front of him.



History: Arashi was born and raised in Kirigakure as part of the Eta clan. His parents died shortly after his third birthday under odd circumstances, although no one is sure just what killed them. When Arashio was five, and not as closed and reclusive as he is now. his best friend, Hirame, was killed in front of him during a sleepover that turned into a robbery. He and Hirame had been tortured with blades to try and get information on valuables in the house. When the boys couldn't help they killed Hirame as a lesson and left Arashi to die. Arashi had felt so helpless that he couldn't do anything that he vowed to become stronger and protect those he loves. During a medical examination shortly after the incident, it was discovered that he had a rare condition that made him feel pain at a lower level then most. so much so, that he almost did not feel pain at all. Once he reached the age of 9 and began training to become a ninja, he used this to his full advantage, training well beyond what others would have been able to due to pain or exhaustion and wearing weights hidden in his clothing at all times. One time when he was eleven, he even put himself into the hospital for a few days due to overworking his body to the point of fainting from exhaustion. Growing up he wasn't able to make many friends, and his shy and quiet nature didn't help. Nor the fact that he spent almost all of his time either training or painting. Arashi was determined to raise his skills to the point that he could protect his friends and family without fail. He also holds a deep hatred for the three men that killed his friend, their faces burned into his memory. If he ever would find them he knew they would not get away with what they had done..

Theme Song: Blackmill: Lucid Truth


Weapons/Items: Supīdo and Tsuyo-sa, AKA the twins



Skills/Abilities
(What are the skills that make your character good at some points or bad. Chakra control, reflexes and such are needed to be placed here.)
[GOOD]
*Can move without the need of sight, due to exceptional hearing. also is a natural at hiding in mist technique.
*Very agile, can attack at amazing speeds with his swords. able to move faster then most in his class due to constant wearing of weighted clothing. also able to move quickly without being heard. (similar to Guy, but not as obvious. usually hidden in leggings, arm-guards, gloves, and weighted sandals.)

[BAD]
*Due to his lack of pain, Arashi tends to take more damage without realizing it, allowing enemies to take him down faster then most others. larger wounds can still cause a noticeable amount of pain however.
*If Arashi's blades are taken from him, his offensive ability drops considerably. most of his jutsus are defense related or stealth related.



Special Traits
*Somewhat higher pool of chakra, not extremely so, but enough to make a noticeable difference. (ex. normal pool of chakra would make a large fireball, and a high level would make a giant fireball, Arashi would be around the middle of the two).
*Extremely fast and agile (when not weighted, otherwise downgrades to 'very' [when compared to current class] )
*Rare condition almost makes him feel no pain.
*Is a user of Eta clan Kekkei Genkai.
*is not great at any particular class of jutsu, but has a decent grasp at each


Kekkei Genkai: Chi No Kiri (sometimes referred to as "Ryūketsu no Misuto")

Name of Kekkei Genkai: blood mist or "the bloody mist"
Clan: Eta
Description: Ninja from the Eta clan sometimes have a rare Kekkei Genkai that appears once every 3 generations in each family. Dubbed "the Bloody mist", Eta clan members that have this Kekkei Genkai have two unique abilities: The first Similar to the hiding in mist technique. Upon activating with the phrase "Ketsueki kizu" (blood wound) and a self inflicted wound, which can be anything from a slight cut to gash to a missing limb, the user produces a red mist that acts almost identically to hiding in mist. a small portion of the users blood creates the initial mist, which spreads according to the amount of chakra used.
The second ability is that they can use the mist as a substitute for water when using any jutsu that would normally require water, given that there is enough chakra within the mist to use the jutsu.

While using Ketsueki kizu, the blood mist can consume the chakra of anyone within it except the user. it will not do this to others that the user does not wish to drain, but will effect others even if their presence is unknown. this adds to the chakra infused within the mist, allowing it to grow slightly faster. although a draining ability, it is slow enough to be unnoticeable to those affected by it (Ninja with very good chakra control can detect this rather easily, while ninja with large chakra pools are noticeably less able to detect the drain.)

Eta clan members seldom use their Kekkei Genkai unless there is a dire need.



Jutsu:



Custom Jutsu



Summons


Read more: http://narutorotg.proboards.com/thread/46/cs-form-rpg#ixzz2vfh0QGtI

@ GlitchyBugger:

Seeing as there hasn't been a review for your characters in a little while I shall do so :)

(Unfortunately I can't accept characters yet but I will offer suggestions and then speak with the other GM's to get them to approve or not).

So for Niji,

I don't really have a problem with anything. Just a couple of suggestions for you, if you wouldn't mind adding the skills/abilities section and keeping it different from the special traits section. Things like the specializing in fuuinjutsu and kenjutsu would fit more in the skills/abilities section as opposed to special traits. If you add that section you may be able to add a few extra things such as decent chakra control etc. If that was what you were wanting for your character. The only thing I am a little confused with is the Shuriken Stick:

GlitchyBugger said
Shuriken Stick A compartmentalised stick with four seals on it, all four seals containing five kunai and five shurikens, upon activation, the seal fires the shuriken and kunai out in a buck-shot fashion. They are fired at the speed of a thrown shuriken. It's a pale, octagonal stick with three lines and hinges to show where to break away for the next seal. The stick is locked together enough to be used for melee combat as well. The length of the stick is 5 feet.

I am not sure how I feel about this weapon. As it stands it's basically a gun that is made to fire kunai and shuriken. It's not the weapon that I necessarily have a problem with as there have been crazier things, but I am a little confused as to why a character that refuses to kill would own a weapon like it? Perhaps if you specify why she has it or that she only uses it in special circumstances, something along those lines would really help to clear things up.

That's it for my notes on Niji. I will take a look at your other character in a little bit here and then give my notes on her as well.

- Chrome

That? She sorta keeps that around for sentimentality, having had it as long as she has. I can add that in later and clear up the skills and such too.

Sorry for the wait Team 2 (Konoha).