[OOC] End of Days RP (EoD - Mass Effect/Evangelion Inspired)

[Raijinslayer]

@Gnar The Missing Link . . . . . . .Well shit, this has gotten ludicrously intense rather quickly. Don't post for Lorenzo before I post, Gnar, it'll be up sometime later today

[Ammokkx]

Whoa whoa whoa, m8, hold up a second here

You're getting your flesh ripped from you, one of if not the most painful thing alongside burning. How the HELL are you talking? Hell, blood should be in your mouth, choking you if you tried. This is uh... pretty illogical. That includes suspension of disbelief, open your mouth and you're screaming and choking.

[Raijinslayer]

@AmmokkxOn a second read through, can't help but agree, though I think at least after the first bite is probable, but definitely not for the second one. Blood is from hi getting his face kicked in earlier. Will edit.

[Ammokkx]

Good call. You probably don't wantto mess more with Lorenzo than you already are, anyway.

[Ammokkx]

No, No, No. You CAN'T talk. There's just no fuckin' way anyone has the balls for that. Look, I get you not screaming for the first few bites. But the moment Ian attempts to open his mouth he'd just scream skywards.

Honestly? You're embarrassing the GM and Atomic's character with what you're doing right now. Remember you're being EATEN ALIVE and TORTURED. Before that you got bullets pounded into you, kicked, and were dragged for a good few minutes beforehand. Ian should be knocking on death's door, only thing keeping him alive being the pain.

@Raijinslayer

[Raijinslayer]

@Ammokkx I assumed that whatever it was they stuck into Ian is also keeping him awake and conscious, so he can better feel the pain. I still feel that Ian would be lucid enough, and have just enough will to mutter that one line of dialogue before it went in for the second bite, whuch involves bones breaking and what not. It's not like he's speaking normally or anything like that. I thought I gave off the impression that he was speaking through clenched teeth or something.

[Ammokkx]

*sigh*

@GreenGoat
@AtomicNut
@Ariamis
@Tancuras
@Dondude
@Thanatos
@Dead Cruiser
@Gnar The Missing Link

What does everyone think?

[Ariamis]

Well, on one hand you gotta think of how a real person would respond to such brutal and inhumane torture, and it would likely devolve into ceaseless screaming: even Solid Snake, a combat veteran with nerves of steel, screams once tortured, and nobody thinks of him as less of a man because of that.

Then on the other hand I'm rooting for Ian, and for story purposes having him deliver a bit of banter to Lorenzo's face is really gratifying for all the shit he goes through. In this case though, I feel like the system's set up so that Lorenzo could hear Ian speak, in the hopes that he would beg for his life and for the torture to stop like the ultimate douchebag he is. Of course, Gnar's got the ultimate authority on the decision of whether or not Ian could say anything during the torture.

[Dead Cruiser]

Honestly, I'm ready for this charade to be over with. After this fiasco, I find both Ian's and Lorenzo's characters to be thoroughly annoying. The phrase "tryhard" comes to mind.

[Ariamis]

Honestly, I'm ready for this charade to be over with. After this fiasco, I find both Ian's and Lorenzo's characters to be thoroughly annoying. The phrase "tryhard" comes to mind.

@Dead Cruiser

I agree with this. Lorenzo's revenge could have easily ended with Ian getting shot and beaten.

[Dondude]

*shrug*

I'd have to agree with @Ammokkx in that I find it difficult to take Ian's successful defiance very seriously; though honestly, getting shot in the kneecaps is just about the most painful experience a human can suffer, probably even moreso than flesh being gnawed off (getting into the nitty-gritty: people eaten alive beyond the first few bites, bear attacks for example, typically don't feel pain). At the point of the kneecapping, and the further elbow shooting and beating, my suspension of disbelief was already gone when he hadn't passed out, but whatever; it's fiction, and it kind of fits Ian's character.

Is it a little over the top? Eh. Does it help me like Ian as a character more? Eh. It's nice seeing the backstory in action, but he's edging very close to the traits of super agent as opposed to human.

@Raijinslayer

[Ammokkx]

speaking of tryharding i hope i'm not doing a bad job of serah meep

[AtomicNut]

This is eva based. Lorenzo can be this of a bastard. Ian on the other hand... I dunno, he's not McLane.

[Dead Cruiser]

<Snipped quote by Dead Cruiser>

I agree with this. Lorenzo's revenge could have easily ended with Ian getting shot and beaten.

@Ariamis

Honestly, my suspension of disbelief got flushed when he shot Ian.

I really don't like Lorenzo as a character. Not because "oh he's so scary and mean to us," but because he's ridiculous and unbelievable. I don't find him threatening, just irritating. He doesn't evoke "hardassed commander pushed to the edge," to me; he's more like "particularly stupid cartoon villain."

[Tancuras]

I think the torture is a good bit of character development for Ian, but maybe we can gloss over the rest? :P

[Gnar The Missing Link]

Honestly, I'm ready for this charade to be over with. After this fiasco, I find both Ian's and Lorenzo's characters to be thoroughly annoying. The phrase "tryhard" comes to mind.

@Dead Cruiser

<Snipped quote by Dead Cruiser>

I agree with this. Lorenzo's revenge could have easily ended with Ian getting shot and beaten.

@Ariamis

Sorry for dragging things out more than they should have folks, I actually just wanted to take this opportunity to introduce the Cruxi prisoner from the opening post~ Seemed like a perfect opportunity.

<Snipped quote by Ariamis>

Honestly, my suspension of disbelief got flushed when he shot Ian.

I really don't like Lorenzo as a character. Not because "oh he's so scary and mean to us," but because he's ridiculous and unbelievable. I don't find him threatening, just irritating. He doesn't evoke "hardassed commander pushed to the edge," to me; he's more like "particularly stupid cartoon villain."

@Dead Cruiser

You're right, Lorenzo isn't a hardass commander, that's not what he's meant to be. There's enough of those types in the military as it is.

Although, calling him a cartoon villain that always succeeds would be quite accurate.

[Raijinslayer]

@Dondude It's not that he isn't going to break, he just hasn't broken yet. Torture isn't somethung that happens instantly, even really painful stuff takes time. As for him getting shot, I would've had him pass out, but as I said earlier, assumed their is some sort of stimulant in the needles. Not to mention I'm way out of my depth here, writing-wise. Never written a scene like this before, plus I'm not really well versed in describing pain or how much certain things hurt.

Also, I do agree that Ian's getting tortured is kinda over the top to the extreme, and something I had trouble understanding the reasoning behind as well. Iif I hsd been awake when it was posted, might've said something against it.

@Gnar The Missing Link I think a better wzy would've been to show Ian the Cruxi, or show him the Cruxi eating someone else. Both would've been morre effective in the long run without damaging the pilot's mental state.

[Dead Cruiser]

Anyway, let's just move on with the story. The less we see of "Torture Wank Mary Sue" Lorenzo, the better.

[Ammokkx]

...I opened a can of worms, didn't I?

[Raijinslayer]

@Ammokkx I think we both did, your complaints were valid, but the entire situation was a clusterfuck from the get go.

@Gnar The Missing LinkYou can have Ian breakdown in anyway you like, as long it makes sense with the character, but we do need to move this along.