Kassarock

Gif the User

Pretty sure that's Nergal from Behemoth right?

The Arrangement [Suki & Kassarock]

Ooooh I like the sound of both of those.

I think though, the bride hunt would be much better/funnier in Eorzia, after all Ozragad has something of an unfair advantage with Elise being the only Eorzian woman at court. Having in Eorzia would have him completely out of his element as well, not know the terrain, being surrounded by strangers, everyone in masks - I can see him freaking out a bit about the whole thing and I want to do that!

The other idea I was also considering as well but forgot to mention is having them exchange meaningful gifts, be cool since it would force them to think about what they other one would like, have to understand each other etc.

How The Leaves Fall

Eli Redgrave

He could see Violet was trying to make things better. She was thoughtless, yes, but Eli knew she wasn't a bad person deep down. It didn't mean it hadn't hurt though. He just wished he could handle it better. Why couldn't he, after two years? He thought he had been getting stronger, getting tougher, but maybe he wasn't. Maybe he was just as weak as he had always been.

In the background Eli could hear Emily stumble her way through the crime statists of Westcliffe followed by a brief discussion of the festival. He didn't mind, he knew it was probably her way to deal with moments like these. Fill the silence with words.

"It's okay, I know... I just... Never mind." Eli turned away from Violet and noticed the the kite on the edge of Emily's desk. He reached out and picked it up. He looked at his likeness, the tired eyes glancing off to the side, the smirk. It looked evasive, apt. "Thanks, Emily."

Eli stepped away from the group and walked further back to where he seat was in the room. As he passed the new girl, Denise, he briefly spoke to her.

"Anyway, nice to meet you Denise, I'm Eli. See you around, yeah?" With a small wave of his hand, Eli took his seat and waited for their teacher to begin.

---

Interactions: @bumbles guthrie @Zoey Boey @Asesina

What character archetypes/characteristics do you gravitate towards?

So I have one particular character archetype I just can't get a way from, and though I don't play them all the time, I've played them a lot now. They have gone by many different names and appearances, but they are essentially the same character - the scarred mage who has done something terrible.

The thing I really like about this character its juxtapositions between things like frailty and power, intelligence and madness, vengeance and guilt. The character is always a frail mage, damaged both physically and emotionally by something they themselves have done, normally dabbling with powers and forces far beyond their ability to control. They often deflect their responsibility in whatever terrible thing has happened and externalise it in a misguided revenge quest. Often foolishly dabbling further with powerful magic in an attempt to gain greater powers in order to fulfil said misguided revenge

The intended character arc is them realising the futility of their vengeance and them learning to live with what happened to them. They cannot undo the past, they can only learn from it and move on. Giving up on forever chasing greater powers and learning to live by the maxim of doing what one must, rather than what one wills.

I know where loads of this characterisation comes from - damaged mages who do bad things are two of my favourite characters in literature, Ged from Earthsea and Kvothe from the Kingkiller Chronicles. Maybe if I have a real long running RP with this character I'll finally get it out of my system, but somehow I doubt it considering I've been writing variations of this character for over ten years now.

The Arrangement [Suki & Kassarock]

So got any ideas for things you want to do?

I still have the assassination plot ticking along in the background.

I thought as for a Formori custom that could be done before the wedding, maybe a hunt of some kind? Suitors having to prove their skill and worthiness to their betrothed etc. Will try to think of some more options.

Any ideas for Eorzian courtship rituals?

The Arrangement [Suki & Kassarock]

Ozragad had not realised how close they were until she had reached out and took his hand in hers. Almost on instinct he began to pull away, but as her fingertips brushed his own he stopped himself. He could feel the difference between them, her soft smooth skin against his own, rough with scars and callouses. Why did she take his hand so? She had called him bloodthirsty warlord but a few days before. Could she not feel the blood that dripped from them still?

They were so close that he could breathe in the scent of her. He wondered then, what perfumes and oils did they used in Eorzia? What fragrances did she bathe herself in this morning before she came here? If he pressed his lips to that small, delicate, white hand that held his, what would it taste of?

He pulled his gaze up and away from that hand and found that she was looking back at him. There was something in her eyes, a look he had not seen there before. He had seen her anger and her fear, they were emotions he had learned to gauge in those azure pools, fish them up for their depths. But whatever she felt now, it was not fear, it was not anger. It was something else. It made him feel strange, it made it feel afraid, and he did not know why.

Get a grip of yourself. You are a King, do not be unmanned by the mere touch of a woman.

With hesitance Ozragad pulled his hand away from her and rose from kneeling to stand again. He stilled his face, calmed his nerves, set his walls about him once more. Stiffly, he strode back to his seat at the opposite end of the table.

"A new start?" He rolled the words around his mouth slowly, considering them. "Perhaps this would be for the best. As for the wedding, we have largely left the planning of the ceremony with your Father's council. The ceremony is to held in Eoriza, once the final treaty has been devised."

"If I may intrude, sire." Manawyndan began to move from his position at the rear to the hall to approach the table. "There are perhaps some Formori customs that could be seen to here before the wedding itself? We did not discuss such things at council today considering the erm... circumstances, but they could some way to familiarise our people with their Queen-to-be."

The Lord Steward stood behind a chair equidistance between his King and the Princess. He appealed to Ozragad for permission to join them. The King gave it with a wave of his hand and the old man cautiously took a seat, his dark flinty eyes darting back and forth between the two royal persons at either end.

"Perhaps there are some Eorzian traditions that could be preformed here too, before we leave for Novrandt? It could help the court... prepare... for the ceremonies in Eorzia. Assuming of course, both of your Royal Highnesses assent?"

TDAC#3 - Celestial Lights (voting and feedback)

Oops I forgot there was an art contest going on as well - my vote goes to Starry Eyed.

Game: Gnome Town

>[X] Craft Mud Brick

RPGC #30 - Celestial Lights (voting and feedback)

My vote goes to God is Great by @V A S H.

There were some other good entries this contest, but that was story I emotionally connected with strongest, and it was also the only story on which I could literally find nothing to pick apart or criticise. Absolutely fantastic work, I look forward to seeing more of your writing in the future.

Some feedback for the other entries:

By Which the Stars are Hung

So yeah this would probably be my second pick amongst the entries, and is a good story in its own right, a potential winner in some other contests I've seen. Excellent imagery, intriguing premise, and a good emotional weight to the whole thing. The one pointer I do have is potentially improving your use of structure in terms of paragraphs and line breaks.

You have quite a descriptive style, and I think some of your imagery looses its impact when its hidden in the middle of some of those quite large paragraphs. Maybe break them down a bit, select key important lines or images to make them stand out - like you do right at the end with the line: 'A voice, deeper even than the beat itself, spoke out.' Your writing is good, give it the space it deserves.

But overall, really good!

Alaska Tales

A lighter, simpler tale here, and nothing wrong with that. Doggos are always a plus too in my book. However, compared to the other entries there's just not enough narrative weight here, not much that really creates that sense of intrigue that draws you into a story and makes you want to learn more. I would have loved to have gotten a sense of who the protagonist is, why do they care about the northern lights? What does it mean to them? Building on aspects like these I think would help create a more compelling story.

There were also a few grammatical errors, and when you have a relatively straight forward and pared back writing style, it means there's nowhere to hide with that. Most of them aren't biggies, but I noticed them nonetheless, some missing capitalisations on some I(s) and some incorrect word choices (lied instead of lay/laid) for example.

To the Stars

So there's definitely some great things to like here. I was very interested in what the universe of this story was like, through context it sounds like an interesting mix of space-feudalism, which I'm always down for personally. I was also interested in the history of our two main characters, Jillian and Duncan. In fact the strongest part of this for me, was the opening, these two characters lying there discussing their world, their hopes, their dreams.

I would have loved to have seen more of these characters relationship prior to the moment of this failed proposal. Make me care about them and the fate of their love more, make my emotional connection to them deeper. It doesn't help either that some your latter dialogue and characterisation feels a bit wooden at times, undermining that sense that these are real people with real lives. I also wasn't necessarily a fan of the kind of omniscient perspective it was told from, though that's more a personal preference.

Friendships

So I used to have a very large group of IRL friends that used this site, or well, the old site at least. It started with me, then I got my best friend to join, and we ended up with about five of us? All friends IRL, all roleplaying on the Guild. It didn't last super long though, after a few RPs together most people dropped away apart from my original friend Danimal who hung around for a few years - RPing with him are honestly some of my fondest memories of the old site. By 2013 I think I was the last one really using the site on a regular basis, still friends with a few of them offline though.

I had a pretty tight group of online friends on oldguild too, some from people who often played with my IRL friends, others from a super long running roleplay I was in that had a pretty active OOC. I still check in with some of them when they appear online, though sadly most of them aren't active anymore.

I like to think I still have a couple of friends on the site now, probably not as many as I once did though.