So, I'll be giving everyone's characters a once-over to give you a chance to fix any issues before Friday when I'll pick my 8 hunters. I figure since everyone is submitting here, we'll migrate to the OOC Friday when I make my selection.
@ERode I see no issues here. Her telekinesis reminds me of Sniper from Yu-Yu Hakusho. Taking off and putting back on the gloves and glasses is pretty funny too. Finish up anything you need and I'll consider her on Friday.
@AlternateMan I don't see any problems with the powers or the story, but there are some grammatical issues and some awkward wording that I would recommend cleaning up. The picture is fine, though you may want to include some physical description to go along with it since it's just a sketch.
@Lord of Evil I'm not entirely sure what you mean by "mingling with society." Hunters commonly mingle, which is why they have limiters to help them blend in. However, being "famous" for hunting youkai among common humans would be a violation of the hunter oath. They are not allowed to reveal the existence of youkai to humans, and that includes claiming credit for hunting them. I like the implementation of runes in your power, as it ties back to Celtic culture, but I think the power is just a bit too versatile. Consider using the runes as a means of manipulating the flame on the heirloom. That would make it a more pragmatic weapon and a more cohesive character.
@sassy1085 Looks like there's quite a bit left for you to fill out. Haha. Any questions, feel free to ask me.
@OwO I think the jaws are super-cool. I'll just have to put a restriction on the life-drain ability, though. It's a bit much if she can perpetually heal and gain energy, so I would say that it should be something like an adrenaline boost. Draining the energy doesn't actually heal or nourish her, but numbs pain and allows her to push herself beyond limits. However, there should be a crash once the borrowed energy is used up. Kinda like a youkai energy drink. Haha. The final ability is fine as long as there is also a major crash for burning all her energy... Though have you read Mistborn? Look up Feruchemy. It might give you some ideas. I like her backstory quite a lot. Must be hard for a disowned hunter to make their way in the world.
@Dead Cruiser As we discussed, this is acceptable. Maybe just specify that you'll start out being able to adapt to three attacks. Blood Shadow reminds me of Hiltless from Demon's Souls. You should check it out.
@GingerBoi123 No issues here. His fighting style reminds me of Roberto from Onimusha 4. I like the shield power and think it fits well with your character thematically.
@Dusty My fault for not mentioning this, but if a hunter marries a human, that would be one of the rare exceptions when they can reveal what they actually do. Kinda like a Wizard marrying a Muggle in Harry Potter. Of course, the human would be expected to keep it a secret. So, Namomai wouldn't have to lie to her husband about what she was doing... though she may choose to keep it a secret if that's the route you want to go. Other than that, it's a beautiful backstory. I think you will have to alter the hunter power a bit, though. I don't want to trivialize injuries in this RP, so straight-up healing like that is a bit tough to accept. I've been strict with other people wanting healing abilities, so I'll have to be strict here too. Maybe focus on other forms of support for hunters, like ability augmentation and the like. I will accept the heirloom's ability, though, as it requires actually dealing damage and then you only recover that much damage. Just a suggestion: Maybe have him sustain the injuries of a wounded ally and then attempt to heal it with his blade? It would let you play support and still make use of your heirloom.
@TheWindel I see no issues here. Though I feel bad for a mentor dealing with her "behavioral issues." Haha.
@KoL I don't think I've ever seen a Miko look that angry before... haha. I'll need you to be more specific on Kyouka and Suigetsu, though. What you're flavoring as "Flow" is essentially vector manipulation, and without clear limits you'll be as OP as Accelerator from To Aru who can passively reflect pretty much anything. Hittin' hard is no problem, but the other two are just too vague to allow. Describe what they actually do as martial art forms, and it shouldn't be a problem, though. I would also like you to specify what Ofuda you have so the heirloom doesn't turn into a bag of convenience.
@Lonewolf685 I love the story of her family
technically is not breaking their vow by pretending their supernatural powers are just an illusion. The shadow ability, though, needs some tweaking. By the sound of it, everything in her shadow is under her control. That's too much. It's fine if it has a disorientating effect on the enemy, or even if you want to choose certain effects, but outright control is a no-go. Stabbing a crossed shadow to inflict damage is cool, though, and that ability is acceptable. Just be warned that she can't go too overboard flaunting her sky-walk in public. If humans start asking questions, the hunters will start asking questions, and that's no good.
So, I had a lot to say on some, and a little to say on others. Feel free to send any questions or suggestions my way to help you develop your characters.
