Hidden 8 yrs ago 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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Savato Super Peace

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@ColorMeEvil Yep

EDIT: @Hexaflexagon Will review you once you fix what's been asked. I essentially proof read for any overlooked details right now.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Dion
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Dion THE ONE WHO IS CHEAP HACK ® / THE SHIT, A FART.

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@ColorMeEvil Hell yes bro.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by caliban22
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caliban22 King of the badgers

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Is there still room? If so I would like to join.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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Savato Super Peace

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@caliban22 Refer to my last post.

That goes for anyone asking in the future.

WE DID NOT CAP THIS IN TERMS OF PLAYER CAPACITY YET
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Hexaflexagon
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Hexaflexagon

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@Buddha
Well that was the most fun I've had reading something in a while. So thanks for that.

Anyway to answer some miscellaneous questions for you while I have a free moment.


"Nana korobi ya oki" Is an old japanses proverb literally meaning "Fall seven times and stand up eight". You know because we've already establish that angsty tenacious rebels gotta rebel and angst. But mostly angst.

Takahasi Clan, there a mixture of both shinobis and regular people because you know I figure that not all Ninja Clans are made of entirely badass ninja. You gotta have a few duds in the bunch right? So the duds deal with the business stuff as well as those ninja too old to go all ninjaing.

How did they get their metric fuck ton of money? The easiest analogy I can compare them to is something like the House of Medici. Started out with just some dude loaning out money to other dudes, fast forward several decades and eventually you end up with a family that has a lot of money (god bless interest) and basically controls all of Renaissance Europe for shiggles. They of course are not on that scale but you know money opens doors. Or yes, you can also call them the Jews of Naruto because that works as well.

Kaze no Yaiba: Yeah I figured as much, I was like how they portray this is pretty OP but giant wind swords are awesome so I'm going to swing for it. But yeah, I'll keep it toned down and make a note that unlike in the anime you can actually see the thing clearly and dodge it for that manner.

Takahashi: Katameru, yeah that's fine, she really couldn't do it to an enemy if she wanted too any because she has to maintain contact and perform the jutsu which, I imagine a foe really would pull away before she could do that. The other option of course is to make it work on living things but I thought that may be a little too overpowered because than you have people going all Superman for twenty seconds with the ability to punch a hole through a tank let alone a human.

And yeah the Kunai would get heavier and the range is probably going to drop like a lot. The difference from throwing a pebble to like throwing a forty pound weight, but in those cases she would probably be using the super dense knife to like pierce through bone or something a little more up close and personal you know.


But yeah thanks for the critiques! I'm currently finishing up something for a meeting I have tomorrow but once I'm done with that, I'll make some edits in the CS proper to make those things in the Jutsu section and the other places more clear.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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@Hexaflexagon I'll review once you're done. I'd hate to accidentally make remarks that have already been made and have been dealt with.
1x Thank Thank
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Renny
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Renny S E A S O N E D

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Maemi

Maemi

Maemi

Maemi

Maemi

Maemi

Maemi

This guy is coming along nicely.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Hexaflexagon
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Hexaflexagon

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@Savato
And the edits to the Jutsu section as well as some other minor edits to some other parts have been made. Feel free to tear it apart at your leisure.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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Review is in Green.





Is good, approved.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Dion
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Dion THE ONE WHO IS CHEAP HACK ® / THE SHIT, A FART.

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@caliban22 spodes didn't word it very well, but yes, there's space.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Hillan
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Hillan I'm a writer - Lying's what we do.

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Howdy.

1x Laugh Laugh
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Dion
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Dion THE ONE WHO IS CHEAP HACK ® / THE SHIT, A FART.

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@Hillan fuk of

Jiyutai jonin is now live, now we gotta wait for Ryo's leader and then we'll hopefully get more of them chunins.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by j8cob
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j8cob The Gr8est / The J8est

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( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Hidden 8 yrs ago 8 yrs ago Post by Javier
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Javier

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It took about 26 hours longer than I expected due to issues and interruptions, but it's finally here. :)
PS: Since I am quite tired at the moment I may have missed a few spelling mistakes when proofreading it.
Hidden 8 yrs ago 8 yrs ago Post by RyoRyoRyoken
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RyoRyoRyoken Lewdlord

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Review in Blue


It took about 26 hours longer than I expected due to issues and interruptions, but it's finally here. :)
PS: Since I am quite tired at the moment I may have missed a few spelling mistakes when proofreading it.

Huh. So, I'm going to go ahead and say that I reject the character in its current state. Take a look at the notes on the Kekkei Genkai. And, maybe this is a taste thing, but Daiki's definitely not the type who would be allowed in any organization with his moodiness and bouts of insanity. At his current level, I doubt his skill would make up for how bad he'd be for Jiyutai morale.

I'll leave Savato and Buddha to comment on anything I may have missed.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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@RyoRyoRyoken Jesus next time use Blue as a color bruh, can barely distinguish anything!
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by RyoRyoRyoken
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RyoRyoRyoken Lewdlord

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@RyoRyoRyoken Jesus next time use Blue as a color bruh, can barely distinguish anything!


I'll probably just comb through and do that right now. Might've been my post-work brain making me dumb-dumb tier.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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@RyoRyoRyoken Props to your snark though, I really enjoyed reading your cancerous review.

Now, I will review once the edginess in the CS is dealt with because, well, I fully agree with the issues brought up by Ryo.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by RyoRyoRyoken
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RyoRyoRyoken Lewdlord

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@RyoRyoRyoken Props to your snark though, I really enjoyed reading your cancerous review.

Now, I will review once the edginess in the CS is dealt with because, well, I fully agree with the issues brought up by Ryo.


I tried my best, man. Now, I must sleep.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Savato
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<Snipped quote by Savato>

I tried my best, man. Now, I must sleep.


weakling
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