[IC] The Broken Drum - Casual drop-in chat for out-of-work adventurers

[SimplyJohn]

@HolyHell "Anything with Pixie Blood!"

While awaiting the strange small man's reply about the wine Geoff heard the call come from one of the side tables. Looking over he saw what at first looked like nothing more than a pile of rags and an old broom and was just about to shout over to Hilda to clean the mess up when he spotted the clawed hand pushing the gold coin across the weathered old table top. Long ago he'd made the decision to never turn away a paying customer who was still sober enough to possibly return to the bar again to become a paying customer again, so with a shrug Geoff waved his hand in the direction of the table, causing the coin to magically jump through the air and into his palm.

Slipping the gold into his pocket Geoff placed one of the smallest glasses in his stock onto the bar before reaching underneath to pull out a welder's mask and a set of tongs. Pixie blood was a tricky brew at the best of times and so with the mask in place Geoff carefully lifted the bottle with the tongs and allowed three drops to fall into the glass. As each one fell it caused a small mushroom cloud to form over the shot glass and what varnish there was on the wooden surface beneath began to slowly peel back away from it.

Stowing his tools back in their rightful place and not wanting to place his waitress in risk Geoff waved his hand to lift the glass magically into the air, carefully guiding it high over the heads of the other patrons before setting it down in from of the small cloaked creature with its broom.

@User "Ill take your oldest wine if you please"

With the order complete Geoff turned back to the small man with a smile, "Certainly. That'll be 2 gold for the 861 Dothrakian Bitterleaf. I understand it's one of the last three bottles in the country and a rather fine choice, if I may say Sir. If you take a seat I'll have the waitress bring a glass up from the cellar for you momentarily."

Clicking his fingers Geoff signalled to Hilda that there was work for her to do, and immediately rolled his eyes as her saw her pocketing the silver coin and note left by Mirai. Whatever those two were upto now couldn't be good, and Geoff only helped it wouldn't end too badly. Mirai was a good customer and Geoff made good money overcharging him almost every time the mage was in town, and Hilda was useful to have around too.

@User "So has the Iron League came by?"

Geoff carefully turned away as the stranger brought up the Iron League, he'd learnt long ago not to involve himself in politics, quests or any game which involved juggling live animals. Instead he reached for one of the many glasses piled up on the bar and began to wipe it 'clean' with the rag hanging from his belt.

Hopefully one of the other patrons would answer the stranger's question for him, that or the man would take a table and spend the night drinking until he'd asked everyone who came in the same question while his pockets slowly emptied into the till.

[HolyHell]

@SimplyJohn

Murmur eyed the glass as it floated toward him.

So the big brute can wield a spell or two.

He thought to himself as the glass finally reached it's proper location. Taking his claw he lifted the glass to his lips and downed the entire drink in a single quick gulp. Fire didn't burn this badly. His eye's gleamed and he belched a plume of smoke. The effects never took long to set in. He smiled a fangy smile and took another look around the bar. A beautiful kind of numbing calm overcame him and the entire bar became distorted. He heard music in his head and visions of small pixies circling about filled his sight.

"So pretty. . ."

He reached his claw out to one of the imaginary pixies to snatch it and eat but it always seemed to be just out of reach. The mind pixies were a devious bunch, they taunted him with their sparkly goodness. Murmur had never managed to devour one but was quite sure they were the most delicious thing in the world. He stood up and started walking toward the pixies which seemed to know his every move, he would devour every single last one of them. They giggled and gleamed so beautifully for food. Now to Murmur he was about to devour his next meal in the paradise that he was magically transported to. To anyone else he was a grinning little imp walking around with a grin and grabbing at the air like an insane little, well, imp.

"Damned pixies! Do you have any idea who I am?! I am Murmur future King of this world and realm! I now command you to be devoured, by me."

The mind pixies obviously had no respect for their future ruler and continued to dance just out of reach. He suddenly realized what he needed to do. Trickery and deception were in his blood, you know Devil God and whatnot. So as they danced out of his reach he suddenly launched himself into the air grabbing at a single pixie who wasn't paying attention. In mid air he snatched it and stuffed the Mind Pixie into his mouth whole and started to crunch. Time was distorted and he floated in the air in his paradise. He was suddenly twelve feet tall and handsome in his castle. The world shouted out his name in admiration and fear. He was Murmur Devil God and King the pixie had given him his true form and revealed his true nature.

Back in reality the little imp jumped and landed face first on the floor snoring softly, a goofy fangy grin on his face as he slumbered. Murmur had learned a valuable lesson. When drinking pixie blood, always remember, Never eat the Pixie.

[MonstrousMan]

Imglush padded heavily up the cold stone cillar steps and peered around the door into the tavern. With a grunt he poked Geoff, handing him a note. As he turned back to his bar, Imglush grabbed a large bottle of wine. Biting off the cork and spitting it -and half the glass that came with it- out of his mouth and into the metal bucket that held the previous nights left overs. Looking in, a nice juicy chunk of meat lay among the scrap.

Plucking the meat from the bucket and throwing it up in the air, Imglush headed back down to his room, cathing the meat in his mouth as he stepped. By the time he reached the bottom of the stairs the meat was devoured and the bottle empty.

Imglush let out a large belch, and scratching his arse with one hand, he opened the door leading into his room with the other.

[User]

Taking the old wine he poured himself a glass. "I remember when this stuff was given out by kings. It was truly a honour to be gifted one of these" He examined the wax stamp. "Ah, the last bottle from the imp kings court" Holding the deep red glass bottle to the light "It was gifted to the lone adventure as a present for clearing the dust clouds." breaking the seal and smelling it "Still have the smell of pixie wings and Magna Crow eggs, it is truly a rare bottle." Sliding four gold coins over the counter. "Thats two for the bottle, one for keeping it pristine and another for not breaking the wax seal" pouring a small glass he took a sip, the taste took him by surprised "Well, I haven't tasted Crowned Goliath blood in a while. It still tastes sugar sweet like it did back when they wernt killed or used for war."

[SimplyJohn]

@User "Thats two for the bottle, one for keeping it pristine and another for not breaking the wax seal"

Geoff nodded politely to the old man and smiled as her took the offered gold. He didn't have the heart to tell the man that the only reason the bottle was intact was that after his armies had sacked the city and gorged themselves in the pantries and wine cellars of the courts this had been the only bottle left out of thousands which had originally been held. And no matter how sweet the wine, after the hundredth bottle Geoff hadn't the appetite for another drop of the stuff.

And as for goliath blood, Geoff always preferred his served freshly squeezed, complete with the pulp.

@MonstrousMan

Turning his attention to the scrap of paper Imglush had handed him Geoff stared incomprehensibly at the crute marks, at first thinking the beast had used the parchment to blow his nose with, or performed some other bodily function. As he turned the paper this way and that he finally started to make out things which, when viewed through squinted eyes and held up at an angle, might just be considered to be letters, but even with that realisation Geoff had no idea what the message was supposed to say.

[Balthazar007]

The young minstrel finished his food and ale. He then looked up toward the barkeep. "Can I have another Dark Ale please? And a shot of whatever that little guy over there just had! Not nearly as much though!" His smile sung sweet ignorance to what he just asked for.

@SimplyJohn

[MonstrousMan]

Imglush sat and waited for Geoff. It was important that he came down to see this, Imglush checked the Globe of Outerbody sight again to be sure.

Yes. It was as bad as he thought - and they were heading straight for the tavern, with an armed gaurd. No no, not good at all. Nervously plucking at the hairs on his arm, Imglush waited

As bugbears arent the most patient of creatures, even with Imglushs slightly superior intelligence, he could wait no longer.

Lifting his mace from the floor he banged on the ceiling, hoping that Geoff would come down.

[SimplyJohn]

@Balthazar007 "Can I have another Dark Ale please? And a shot of whatever that little guy over there just had! Not nearly as much though!"

"Certainly, I'll just fetch the tongs for you."

@MonstrousMan Lifting his mace from the floor he banged on the ceiling, hoping that Geoff would come down.

All of a sudden the floor lurched beneath Geoff's feet, the wooden boards splintering and cracking as they were struck roughly from below. He only just had time to reach out and grab his stave from where it was laying on the bar top before the floor finally gave way beneath him, dropping him down into the cellar to land smack down on top of Imglush.

Quickly climbing off of the beast, rubbing his bruised backside with one hand and waving his tree branch at the ceiling to quickly repair the damage, Geoff glared impatiently at his companion and his spat through gritted teeth, "What do you want!?!"

[MonstrousMan]

@SimplyJohn Pointing to the globe that sat upon the pedestal in the centre of the room "trouble," Imglush said. Skulking to his work bench Imglush began to hammer out a chest plate with his two hammers, swinging this way and that with each arm. If Imglush was anything, he was a master smith. Atleast in this cumbersome form.

[HHShetland]

"De... broo k'n... dee broo-k'n... huh."

Tongzka the Bardovan dockworker was exhausted. Never in his life has he had to trek on foot through uncivilised, undeveloped wilderness for that long. There were so many trees around, quite honestly, the four-foot-tall alien found it exhilarating. He'd seen a couple trees back in Zapruzhatza, but they were all in parks. And they made a sort of 'BWONG' noise when you knocked on them. These were more rough and infested with worms, and generally not very nice.

Now, in his exhaustion, he had reached a building that he presumed was some kind of Cantina, what with the great emblem of a drinking implement on the front. But the words above it confused him; they were written in some bizarre language he'd never seen before.

"Dee Broo-k'n D'rem." He finally settled on after a good fifteen attempts at pronouncing the name. He rubbed his top antennae with one hand, adjusting the Thermal Lance strapped to his back with the other. Never left home without it. Hopefully, with a bit of luck, it'd come in handy for communicating with the locals he'd seen, what with their elaborate stage magic culture. One of them managed to trick him into thinking he'd shot fire out his hand, and it was so well-done, Tongzka actually caught fire for a few seconds. Tongzka couldn't help but be impressed.

Tongzka wandered... or 'pattered' might be a better term... inside the building. Yet more evidence of low tech in the area, he noticed, what with the lack of central heating. Or metal. That was another thing he wasn't used to; everything was so brown. It was so brown, in fact, that he could practically taste the brownness on his slick tongue. It tasted like Favelanian chocolate liquer.

He pattered up to what he assumed was the bar, though it was a bit difficult to tell considering that it wasn't that big and didn't even have a cover over it. The seats were too big and unwieldy as well. Tongzka gingerly lifted himself up onto one of them, fearful that he might get deadly poisonous splinters.

"...K'dav?" He called out, in the hopes of attracting the attention of whoever owned this establishment. "Miz be-fli tep'ru-tza debka. An'ma... uh..." He paused and considered his words, realising that the locals probably don't know what a 'Teleporter' is. "...Miz dan'run ode-muz'sa."

[SimplyJohn]

@MonstrousMan "trouble,"

With a smile Geoff patted his friend on the shoulder affectionately. "Not 'trouble', 'business opportunity'." He corrected with a gleam in his eye. His father, Phil the Pointless, had always taught him to look for the opportunities in any situation and not to get bogged down about what might go wrong. Of course, no-one had seen or heard from Phil ever since he'd led his army of trained goats through a mystic portal to seize the throne of Asgard single-handed, but the principle seemed sound in any case.

@HHShetland

Quickly turning towards the staircase Geoff hurried back up to the bar, only to be faced with the strange looking Bardovan balancing himself on one of the bar stools. He smiled warmly to the newcomers, baring his fangs as a sign of respect, before turning away to fetch his welding mask and tongs.

@Balthazar007

Quickly serving up a single drop of pixie blood in a glass which if anything was smaller than the last, Geoff turned back to the barrels behind him and filled a large tankard with dark ale.

Setting both drinks down in front the minstrel, who seemed to have been waiting patiently for quite some time for the barman to return, Geoff held out his hand for payment. "That'll be seven silver, since you still haven't paid for your last round, or the chicken." he said pointedly, nodding towards the roasted bird which lay gently settling into a puddle of its own juices on the bar close at hand.

[Genni]

With a blinding flash of light the goddess in the form of a young woman appeared in the middle of the yard, her gaze wandering serenely over the collapsed remains of an old cart and the weather-worn sign proclaiming the inn to be the Broken Drum before she finally noticed the flames steadily growing in the folds of her dress.

"...ohfuckohfuckohfuck..." She muttered hopping from one foot to another as she made her way quickly over to a nearby horse trough and doused the fire with a quick splash of water, sending electrical sparks flying as her powers and the liquid met in a cascade of rioting power. Soon the nearby pile of straw was ablaze with Astrape standing sheepishly nearby. Hoping no-one had spotted her little accident the lightning goddess quickly sidled into the tavern, putting an an air of innocence which just screamed 'guilty' to everyone who saw her.

[Balthazar007]

@HHShetland @SimplyJohn
The young minstrel watched curiously as a foreign creature padded through the door frame and mounted a stool just two seats away. The little strange creature started to speak in a dialect that the minstrel had never heard before. This curious sight was cut short by the barkeep. Geoff, as the minstrel came to understand, set the beer and tiny shot glass down in front of him.

"That'll be seven silver, since you still haven't paid for your last round, or the chicken."

"What? I could have sworn I paid after I escaped the whole wild orc situation," the minstrel said, pointing over to the still frozen giant orc in the middle of the room. He then reached into his pocket and pulled out exactly seven silver pieces, taking a deep sigh as he set them on the bar top. "But I guess I didn't. Here you go."

@Genni
Those seven silver pieces were all the minstrel had left to his name. He would have to start performing to earn his keep again. But first, he would drink his shot and then the ale, with hopes that he wouldn't end up like the little imp on the floor. He raised dramatically up in the air, and just before bringing the glass to his lips, he caught the scent of smoke. Following the scent, the young man looked over to the front door to see the most beautiful young lady he had ever laid eyes on. Something about her aura was glowing, and she had the cutest faint smile that said 'oops'. Noticing the flames behind her, he could only assume that she had started the fire.

It was just then that it hit him. He had seen this young woman before. He was sure of it. A bright light flashed in his mind's eye as he remembered a bright golden hue and a heavenly choir of music. It was a distant memory, if not an illusion of the mind altogether. But somewhere in the golden light that filled his vision he saw the young woman's face, though it looked different, foreign like the little creature on the stool. Then the golden light started to fade, revealing an entire crowd of faces before the scene disappeared altogether.

His laps in memory must have only lasted a second, as the shot glass was only halfway fallen to the ground when he regained consciousness. He tried to swipe at the glass to keep it from hitting the ground, but he knew he wasn't going to make it. He wasn't some sort of hyper reflexive man that inherited super human abilities from a wild mishap with an insect bite or anything like that.

[Cuccoruler]

@Balthazar007
Domaku had just come up to the broken drum. He smiled to himself as he felt that after a long days work of searching for precious stones it was time for a drink. He was a bit dirty after being covered in rock dust all day but he honestly didn't care. Domaku entered the bar with a huge smile on his face, he noticed the minstrel and couldn't help but smile even more.

"Hey Brother play something up beat! I feel the need to dance!" He requested has he dug a small opal out of his bag to hand to the minstrel. He didn't really keep any money with him and instead had gems that could be sold for a rather good price. Gorons were notoriously destructive dancers as their weight had often been the cause of broken wooden floors. This floor would most likely have holes in it by the time Domaku would finish his dancing fun.

[Genni]

As she walked into the bar Astrape quickly scanned the room, hoping no-one had noticed the blazing inferno threatening to burn down the stables behind her. Out of all the people there the only one who seemed to be paying her any attention was the bard leaning against the bar, his eyes staring right at her as she made her way through the crowd towards an empty table.

There was something about that boy that was vaguely familiar, a feeling in the air around him that spoke of ancient magics which seemed to resonant with her own powers. Sparks danced in the air between them for a moment before Astrape realised she's stepped in a pool of drool leaking from the mouth of a strange imp creature which seemed to be passed out on the floor. Breaking her attention away from the boy Astrape leaned down to inspect the unusual creature, running her hand across its brow so she could peer into its eyes.

@HolyHell "Are you okay, strange creature?" She asked the imp, letting a sliver of power flow from her fingers to sparkle against his skin. Hopefully that should be enough to rouse the imp from his slumber, she thought to herself kindly.

[Balthazar007]

His finger tips brushed the shot glass, but he was to late indeed. The drop of pixie blood hit the floor and exploded, creating a mushroom cloud of rainbow smoke and leaving behind a hole in its wake. He stared, dumbfounded by the little explosion and thanked his lucky stars that he hadn't put that stuff in his stomach.

@Cuccoruler
The lute player snapped out of his trance, when a small rock like creature presented him with a gemstone. He immediately looked up and processed the strange creature's request. "ABSOLUTELY!" He exclaimed suddenly, "Anything for stones this precious!" He swung his lute around on it's leather strap, much like a rocker at concert, and began playing one of his favorites. The rhythm was fast paced, and he would beat on the face of the lute to create a percussion background.

It didn't take long for him to get into the music. His eyes closed and he began singing beautifully intricate lyrics with cryptic meanings. The lyrics would go to and fro between wold powers struggling over something called oil and epic stories filled with giants and gods. It was as if the minstrel wasn't even conscious of his words, but more-so focused on keeping up with his own fast paced music.

[Cuccoruler]

This tune was something that Domaku almost felt as familiar. He started to dance like there was no tomorrow. "This is the stuff!" He yelled out in joy as he danced around the bar, knocking into tables and such and even knocking over a few drinks. He didn't really care though as he was just having too much fun. Every now and then he would stop for a moment and take a peice of marble stone out of his back and munch on it before starting to dance again, to other patrons he seemed like he was having a time of his life. Though such a large creature like him dancing around would inevitably cause alot of damage if he wasn't stopped soon.

[SimplyJohn]

With a heartworn sigh Geoff reached once more for his stave, waving it at the hole near the bard's feet and causing the wooden planks to grow and reform back as they had been before the pixie blood had done away with them. It looks like it was going to be another one of those nights, the ones where the entire tavern would've been reduced to rubble if if hadn't been for his magical abilities keep the place together.

Even as he pondered the problem Geoff's eye caught sight of the bright glow coming from out in the yard. Leaping up over the bar, scattering several mugs across the floor as he went, Geoff ran for the yard, only to be faced with a raging inferno already doing its best to eat the stables and all the horses inside whole as the frightened beast screamed in terror from within their stalls. Moving swiftly over to a wooden pedestal set near the front gates Geoff took hold of a large crystal hanging beside a sign stating:

In Case Of Fire, Break Crystal.
Only In Case Of Fire, At No Other Time.
Honest, Only In Case Of Fire.
We Really REALLY Means This!

Moving as close to the blaze as he'd dare Geoff lifted the crystal as high as he could and threw it down onto the cobblestones, his face twisting in fear as he watched the fragile stone smash apart, shattering into thousands of piece.

A moment later the crystal fragments seemed to melt, puddling together before rising up to take on the form of a large pair of breasts. Geoff rubbed his eyes hard with his fingers, this was the reason he hated having to deal with Her, even if Her services were invaluable at times like these. By the time he looked back the woman's body had fully formed as She stood hovering in front of the half-troll with a broad smile on Her face.

Nerys

"Mmm, ^{called me} out to play, _{have you,} my Love..?" The spirit purred, her voice as thick as sin and just as deadly. As the words bubbled out between her lips the spirit ran its hands over its body, tempting Geoff to follow them down to a place he knew would cause nothing but trouble.

"We don't have time to play Nerys," Geoff said, trying to keep his voice from wavering as he gestured towards the blazing inferno inching its way towards the tavern full of customers. "Do something about that, quickly!" He barked, trying to draw the nymph's gaze away from his staff. They both knew what she wanted from him, and Geoff had to make sure he got the tricky sprite to do her duty before she got too out of hand.

Turning around Nerys leaned forwards as if examining the raging flames, while at the same time lifting her well-shaped ass just high enough to tease Geoff with a clear view of her bubbly goodness. "Such a _{paltry thing}..." She sighed with disappointment, "And ^{here I} was hoping _{for a} little more ^fun..."

With that the spirit dove into the flames, her body expanding outwards as a crashing wave, covering the yard, the stables and all around them with an unstoppable torrent of water which smothered every last flame. When she was done Nerys pulled her body back together, her figure now several storeys high, towering over the Drum in a magnificent display of her femininity. Geoff had to act fast and spinning his stave in his hand he fired off a bolt of pure green energy which struck Nerys... well, let's just say she enjoyed feeling it where it struck and leave it at that, shall we?

As she threw back her head, giving out an exploding cry of orgasmic pleasure Nerys's body began to wither and coalesce, shrinking down and hardening until finally collapsing back into a crystal almost identical to the one Geoff had smashed apart only moments before. "_{... until next time...} Lover..." came her last words, whispered on the wind as Geoff moved to place the stone back on the pedestal, ready for the next time some damn fool magic user coughed in the wrong place, or whatever the hell had happened to start the blaze in the first place.

Storming back towards the Drum Geoff entered the bar with the same rage and fury he'd used to storm the gates of Nezgaroth, a city he'd razed with his own bare hands. "Right..." He bellowed, his voice shaking the ceiling timbers, "Which one of you damn sodding fools set fire to my yard!?!"

[HolyHell]

@Genni Murmur Devil God and King of this world was addressing his subjects, sacking cities, and surrounded by beautiful women, all of whom he was taller than now. The Pixie had of course revealed his true nature, even broom-staff was now a proper instrument of destruction. Murmur they would all say, their voice ripe with fear and admiration. There were statues erected in his honor, he was finally where he needed to be. The old Wizard had of course been right.

His head was spinning and his eyes opened, he was no longer Devil God, he was not back to being future Devil God and King of this world. Perhaps the Pixie had given him a revelation of some sort. Perhaps he had seen the future or something of the sort. Maybe he didn't want to wake up and yet something did indeed wake him up. He however oddly enough didn't feel all too hung over as he would have imagined. He must have drank a barrel of pixie blood to really end up on the ground.
His black little heart ached with longing to return to the reality that the Mind Pixie provided him. Red eyes looked at the woman that had awakened him. MurMur stood dusted off his robes and adjusted his oversized hat. He stretched and his tail stiffened claws cracked and a yawn revealed razor like teeth, which he enjoyed to use to devour dead birds, horses, and various cheeses.

"Why did you wake me up?!" He shouted "Why would you disturb such a beautiful dream! Is this what you do? Go around and ruin peoples dreams!"

MurMur was of course a bit sore, you try being in Heaven for a night and wake up in Hell. He was craving Pixie blood but there was much work that needed to be done. The consuming of the Mind Pixie had revealed to him how he could escape this horrible form and assume his rightful role in the world as Devil God. It was all so obvious now. However he would first scold this woman for awaking him.

[Genni]

@HolyHell "Why did you wake me up?! Why would you disturb such a beautiful dream! Is this what you do? Go around and ruin peoples dreams!"

At first Astrape was taken aback by the imp's accusation, but as his words sank in she felt the fires of her rage building within her. The sparks she'd used to aid in Murmur's recovery began to grow, rippling up and along her arm as they merged together to form arcs of bright energy. "Is this what I do? Is this what I do?" She screamed angrily, her barely contained fury causing her eyes to sparkle and flash with power.

"Do you not know who I am, base creature? Do you not know the daughter of Odin, sister of Thor and Aldrif, handmaiden to Zeus himself? Do you not know..." As she spoke Astrape reached her hand back, the rippling energy merging together into the form of a great spear. Just as it seemed ready to strike the far end of the shaft tapped against the frozen orc's uplifted axe behind Astrape and in an instant blinding flash of blue white light the beast was reduced to nothing more than a pile of ash in the middle of the floor, its weapons falling melted and useless on top of the heap.

For a moment the lightning goddess simply stood there, her form once more that of an unimposing young woman with one empty hand held high in the air and a look of sheepish uncertainty slowly melting onto her face. Finally her voice cracked between her lips, almost a whisper compared to the booming volume it had had only moments before, "_{...astrape...}" She concluded, her grand crescendo reduced to nothing more than a whimper.

Leaning forwards over Murmur Astrape screwed her hands together apologetically, "Umm... sorry about this," she muttered, her eyes darting sideways towards the bar for a moment, "Would you mind if I... umm, topped up a little before we continue with this?" Just then the tavern door was kicked open as the half-troll who'd darted outside only moments before stormed back in again. @SimplyJohn "Right... Which one of you damn sodding fools set fire to my yard!?!"

Quickly shrinking back Astrape's eyes darted over to the bard by the bar, hoping he, as the only one who'd noted her entrance, wouldn't finger her as the culprit as she slunk slowly back into the shadows.