Avatar of BangoSkank

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Recent Statuses

9 mos ago
Current Star Wars Persistent World, that was a thing that was sort of a thing. Kind of.
12 mos ago
LongSword is objectively the best main. Objectively.
1 yr ago
The ones from Calle are usually monthly. I tried to start another one a few years back.
1 like
1 yr ago
If you feel like you need help no shame in going out there and getting it. Take care of yourself.
4 likes
1 yr ago
I think you can develop a flair. A personal style. Words and phrases you like. That's why I don't get using Grammarly for word suggestions.
5 likes

Bio

I be Bango.

Most Recent Posts

Held in a Particularly Preposterous Position, Perpendicular to the ground, Danger Danger Fontaine considered a Proportionally Preposterous Proposition. What would happen if he...

"Muhhhh gerrrrrrttt" announced out Mole Man Announcer.

"My God," translated Mole Man Translator.

"FERKIS AT?" shouted Mole Man Announcer.

"Fuck is that?" translated Mole Man Translator.

Atreus and Gallium briefly Diverted from their in-Depth Discussion of Denmark to explain.

"That's the Two Graves you fucking Moles."

It was unnecessarily rude. They were indeed Moles, but Aloysius and Gatriullus didn't have to say it like that. Just because they were Mole People didn't mean they didn't have feelings. If you cut them they would bleed just like you or I. I mean you would have to cut pretty hard because they had all that thick ass hair and their skin was also very thick. And there was a thick layer of fat underneath that thick layer of skin to keep them insulated. It is very cold Underground U Understand and because they live Underground they have to retain as much heat as possible. But if you were To cut Through Their Thick hair and Thick skin and Thick layer of subcutaneous fat They would eventually bleed. And probably cuss you out for cutting Them just To Test This hypoThesis. You fucking dick you.

"Too Graves!" called out Mole Man Announcer.

"Two Graves," translated Mole Man Translator.

They were correct. Mole Man Translator less so, as Two instead of Too was a grammatical error rather than a translation error, but his heart was in the right place.

Danger, Danger Fontaine, held in a very awkward position and having his theoretical life blood drunk out of him like some sort of very manly and probably quite high in sodium elixir, had realized there was only one logical way out of this.

He had kicked his legs hard in the air, like a small child throwing an extremely masculine tantrum, and as a result he had driven both of their heads hard into the mat.

A rarely seen maneuver popularly known as "Two Graves" and it was aptly named as it left both contestants on the floor severely fucked up.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*


A new song blasts through the loud speakers. It sounds like Glass Breaking. Glass Shattering even. Get it? Do you get what I've done? Do you understand the reference? It's Stone Cold Steve Austin. That was the sound that played when he made his entrance. Glass Shattering. It was also the name of the song. I am very clever.

The crowd turns to see Stone Cold Steve Austin make his way to the ring. What a fucking shock this will be. Stone Cold Steve Austin is retired. And probably still under contract with the WWE. And like 60. And also a real life person instead of a goofy ass character in an RP on an Internet Forum designated for making dumb ass RPs. They're in for a Rude Awakening.

The music stops and the lights go out.

WTF is this. That's weird. It's not part of---

I LIE. I CHEAT. I STEAL.

Holy shit. The arena goes wild.

The Human Announcers go wild. Absolutely losing their shit. It's fucking Eddy Guerrerro! How is that possible? Hasn't he been dead for more than a decade? WTF!

The Mole Man Announcers go wild. It's fucking loud. It's suddenly dark. The crowd is screaming. This is bullshit. They just want to go back down into their nice Mole Man burrows and sleep. If Galileo and Andretoni could just keep their petty lovers' squabbles to themselves they could be off doing Mole People shit. Living Their Best Mole Lives. FUCK!

"It can't be!" Mole Man Announcer announces, momentarily forgetting he's not supposed to be able to speak English clearly.

"It can't be!" Mole Man Translator translates, hoping folks will overlook Mole Man Announcers' obvious fuck up.

"It's Tequila Sunrise!" Adanberto shouts, absolutely spazzing the fuck out that his favorite shameless mish mash of Steve Austin and Eddy Guerrerro is now running down the ramp toward the ring.

Mole Man Announcer, Mole Man Translator, and Gustavito all appear disappointed that it is just whoever the fuck Tequila Sunrise is rather than the much better known, widely beloved, and either retired or dead wrestlers they were hoping for. Adalberto however is still Massively Marking out. He has now somehow removed his boxers without removing his pants and thrown them into the ring.

Meanwhile Tequila Sunrise, a bald Hispanic man with a goatee, a poncho, jean shorts, and Cowboy boots, runs to Danger, Danger Fontaine's grocery cart of weapons and, with the lobster's express written consent, grabs a chair then rolls into the ring.

He does that one spot. The one where he looks around the ring from the still very fucked up Mole Man, MOLE MAN, to the still very fucked up Human Man, Danger, Danger Fontaine, and then back, and then back again, and then to the referee, and then to the crowd, and then to Camera A, and then he starts smacking the chair on the mat like he's about to do something cool, fucking finally and then...

The lights go out again. Fucking rolling blackouts. They're back on. They're back out. They flicker faster than Michael J. Fox and then the National Anthem plays, then it transitions into a circus theme.

Oh fuck, you guys. You guys! Fuck! You know what that means. Awwwwww Shiiiiiiiit!

General Shenanigans makes his way to the top of the ramp. Camouflage pants very camouflage-y. Big Red Shoes not at all camouflage-y. Shit's about to get even stupider. What the fuck.
The Ratling had arrived late.

Making your way through corridors scattered with the bloody and battered remains of several of your shipmates was tough work when you were his size. Sometimes folks who seemed very much dead were actually still very much alive and desperate to escape the piles of bodies they were trapped in. Sometimes they were just buried, those could be helped. Sometimes they were dead and just didn't know it yet. Bleeding out too rapidly and too far from help. Burned up beyond any hope of return but still stubbornly clinging onto last vestiges of life. This one poor bastard had been gutted.

Roald had tripped over a loop of the unlucky son of a bitches' intestines. Now that's a bad day.

He considered informing them of what had kept him, but decided against it. They were contemplating coming to the aid of that other ship. Hard to say whether it was smart or not. On one hand there was all that happy shiny bullshit about not just leaving a ship full of Imperials to be torn to pieces and consumed or worse. Probably worse. On the other hand they might just end up eaten or fucked or fucked and eaten, who knew what order things might happen in. Maybe he would get turned into a little tiny halfdemon or something. None of those possibilities particularly interested Roald.

Contemplating the position Roald stroked his face where his full manly beard would be were he not a Ratling. As a Ratling there was little there other than full rosy cheeks and, oh what was this, a bit of congealed blood with hairs sticking out of it. Gross.

Flicking those flesh bits of indeterminate origin on the floor Roald added his two cents to the conversation.

"If'n we're going on in dere I'm gonna need a better weapon. Pistol and Long-Las ain't exactly suited to close quarters."
Do they be canon?

Is there like a volcano planet a wee Halfling lad and his traveling coterie of companions might cast a ring?

Would they need a booster seat to pilot an X-Wing?

If one were to wear a hoodie would it look more like an Ewok or more like a Jawa? Incorrect. The correct answer is it would look like Flesh Tone Yoda.
I haven't seen any of She Hulk. It looks very meh. To me all the shows have looked very meh and been very meh. This twerking stuff is new to me but it makes sense in light of the sheer mehness.

Giving these folks as much credit as possible I assume they don't like the twerking as an extension and prime example of how lazily they are treating the character. If it's actually purely "she shouldn't be twerking" or "Megan is trash" I have to imagine they work in a field entirely devoid of female coworkers. I'd understand more if it were during the actual show and an extended scene without character development. Although even then with the crackerjack CGI it wouldn't cost them much.

Loki was probably my favorite of them, of the ones Ive seen. Female Loki was cool and the whole Loki falls in love with himself IMO made a lot of sense. Falcon/Winter was a political vehicle and heavy handed at that, IMO. I didn't see the Ms Marvel one or the Hawkeye one. I'm pretty sure there's another I did see but I can't think of what other tv shows there have been.

I think a lot of the problem, from both sides, comes from creators and corporations making a show or movie not out of love or creative vision but out of a desire for $$$ and out of a need to create something in a particular IP because they own that IP and therefore just must do something with it. So they hire someone, ideally someone they can can use in marketing, to produce something, and that something is guided by what is marketable rather than any particular vision or long term plan.

The general frustration with stuff like that leading to folks over reacting. Both creators, in the form of excessive direct to the audience rants like She Hulk's anger speech, and audiences in the form of shitting a brick over a what 10 second clip of She Hulk twerking with a professional twerker.
Nope was good.

Not amazing. Not revelatory. Not transformative. Not life changing.

But it was good. Keke Palmer is great in it. That guy who is in everything Peele does was ok. Keith David was great. The monkey kid and monkey storyline was pretty good.

Overall I'd say see it but don't drop all your plans to see it. Good to see on a bored night in. 7 or 8/10 if a 10/10 is incredibly rare and a 9/10 is a movie you'll tell your friends they have to see it.
Gaming laptop.

Nitro 5, the like 1050 Ti one. Not amazing but I got a great deal on it. $500 back when I got it in like 2020 and sells for like $700-800 now.
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