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3 yrs ago
Current I remember being on this website all the time. Where does the time go
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4 yrs ago
Buying GF with Fall Guys crowns please pm me if interested
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4 yrs ago
I'm going to beat you to death
4 yrs ago
Today on bottom gear
4 yrs ago
Dear diary, I shat myself to destroy the libs.
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Thanks for the positive reception to my first post everyone! Have to admit I was feeling a little outclassed by the cast we'd gathered. Glad I could prove serviceable.
So my first post was basically a propaganda piece, though how true it is is up to you!
The Rebellion of the Elders
Elder Chief Ulder Birdwatch Baldug of Baldugtagee and Windbeach (-23 - 44)
It was in that fateful year of 23 when Ulder Birdwatch Baldug came to his nephew's court, eldest at a group of shamans and soldiers. The lands of Baldugtagee Minor had felt the horrific mistreatment of Eaglebeak, cursed be his name, whose rule was cursed and whose blood was said to corrode the ground when wounds were opened in his gaunt form. He had, by the elder's blessing, been given control over "all that the forests touched and the sand saw", none the wiser of his corrupted brain.

Ulder had been the loudest among them, hollering claims of his nephew's divinity and kind rule even as the ground beneath them was seized and taken behind the palace to have flowers planted within. Ulder's mind finally failed his nephew when the younger man demanded Ulder relinquish control over his own personal domain, at the same time as he made open plans to overthrow the ascended government.

It was a blessing upon my own eyes that I witnessed the tenfold rage erupting from Ulder's mind as he spoke then, his roars mightier than any I had ever heard. He said unto his nephew thusly:

"The lands of old, kings buried within, are never to be raped and soiled by your pitiful acquiescences." To that, Chief Eaglebeak grabbed upon Ulder's flesh, and clawed deeply into his arms with a scourge of leather and glass. He spat upon his elder, his uncle, how vile was his temperament and how soiled was his legacy. He sat back upon his throne, a hunched, crone-like youth, madness darting behind his eyes like children darting amongst the wood. His voice was like an arch pulled upon oak, frozen in its brutality and lost in the coldness of his bosom:

"I am chief in all the oak does see, chosen by those who now hide within the shadow of your foolishness. Scourge him twenty and continue in the same path until the morning." A punishment light for the crime of high treason as had been for years long forgotten.

As he was held upon his flesh by soldiers, rodents all, Ulder's eyes held a flame so immense that I cannot find myself to put it to words. He swore that day in language most uncouth that he would return ever the braver, ever the stronger, and ever the wiser, hefting upon his shoulders a god-gift that would show whose claim was right to the throne as it was sat upon.
Fieldcat Neversaw Lurntag, Eldest Shaman and Scribe, 23


Ulder was freed within a fortnight, the elders, in their fury, called to the stars above and laid themselves bare to the gods, scourging themselves and pleading to be freed of their inherent violence to become unworthy of scorn for what may be forced upon them by the forces of fate. The gods had agreed, blessings were laid upon their worthy shoulders, so that those who may claim it would take the first blow and be free of any scorn in the eyes of those far beyond mortal comprehension.

These elders took upon themselves the task of burning the minds of the plebeians into a fervor, appealing to their minds in any ways they could gain, prostrating themselves and giving up all worldly possession and granting unto those who would agree gifts not meant for mortal men.

They took to the buildings, burning them as if straw, crying a mighty cry from the roofs of mutilated temples and garrisons. They sent away soldiers and stole their weapons, turning them upon their former possessors with a fury unabated. Ulder found himself freed during this same looting and destruction, taking his place at the head of the column and commanding the elders and youth alike. He marched upon Eaglebeak's castle and met with the chief's servants upon the shores of the Goldsea, whose waters gave silent encouragement and whose surface gleamed as if their namesake had been given unto them by the gods. The charge was soft like a flood and with the fury of a flame, the elders fought like the gods themselves taken mortal form. Spears were hefted and thrown, battle was engaged in a furious melee, the servants wielding shields and taking to a line so straight it was said to reach the Ancient Steppe, while the fervent and righteous rebellion fought like heroes to a man, charging themselves and each whetting their spears on the men's inner workings.

In the end, it wasn't men in tandem who won the battle, it was men themselves, each empowered by their own righteousness and fury. At the end of the day, the armor that was tossed into the sea was enough to hold a flock of gulls who frolicked on the defeated's possessions like vultures on a corpse. The rebellion hoisted the golden shields upon Ulder's shoulders as he marched into the home of the Chief, and no man's knee remained unbowed. He bellowed out like a furious beast:

"I have returned as I said I would have, god-gift upon my shoulders and wisdom above my brow, the god's glow about my flesh."

The Chief cried out a hideous sound of agony or rage.

"You have returned a man, where is the god whom was promised to me?" Ulder took the man by his lapels and shook him like a hound.

"You were promised a better man, no god, and I have returned as promised, dare you deny me what has been granted by right?" And the chief was silent as he was hoisted from his throne and tossed to the sea, consumed and never to be seen again.

"I have given of my blood, of my tears, and of my will, all for what has been created here. May my blood again run if ever this does repeat, let my promise only end when the great seas do run dry. Let it be sung from here to the highest mountain peaks, my folk shall never again be slaves!" Ulder gave a speech that brought many to tears, and yet some were unconvinced. Ulder took his crown and hefted it over his head, the cheer in response so great that it rattled the ground and whatever lived within it.
Fieldcat Neversaw Lurntag, Eldest Shaman and Scribe, 23
@Lord Orgasmo Nobody loves the white mage unless the white mage is healing them.
@Mercenary Lord Hello again.
I think Discord is a better format.
After a long day of fighting crime and dealing with people, Comet decided that the best course of action for now was to stop being Comet and go back to being Edward. He arrived at home still in uniform, stripped down and climbed into bed, lounging for what felt like hours before finally falling asleep.

Edward!

Edward shot awake, the room was dark and suddenly smelled of burning plastic. He frowned in confusion, sitting on the side of his bed and yawning. He furrowed his brow and scanned. It wasn't the same room he had fallen asleep in, it was near-black, but a light orange light creeped in from under the door. He looked down at his hands, still covered in burn scars, so that hadn't changed. He stood up and immediately collapsed on the ground, his legs in incredible burning pain. It was like every wound he had ever taken had opened at once.

He growled and pulled at the ground, his entire body in searing pain. He kept going, pulling at the ground, but he never got any closer to the door, the light only getting stronger and blasting at his eyes. He wasn't moving, he was stuck, and he had never felt this feeling before, all throughout his life he had never felt stuck, he could always move fast enough to escape before, but not now, now he felt like he had been crippled.

Like he was broken.

His ears began to ring in his ears, louder and louder until it hurt, he could always run faster than sound before, was this some sort of ironic hell?

The room was fully lit up now, a diploma on the wall, flowery wallpaper, a perfectly made bed and a pair of bunny slippers on the ground.

He knew this room, this room meant something to him, back in Wales, he had been in this room more times than he could remember, this was James' room.

Edward!

He recognized James' voice now, he was terrified, his voice breaking in terror. From the other side of the door he heard thumping feet and screaming from the other room. The door crashed open, and the light blinded Edward as two figures burst in, one holding a knife. They fought, poorly, like they had both already been hurt. The man with a knife finally stabbed the other man, who fell to his knees. The man with a knife slit the kneeling man's throat in an instant. The man's blood splattered on the walls, on the floor, everywhere, and in a way oh so familiar to Edward.

The man fell, and Edward saw his face. James spoke despite his ravaged throat.

I'm sorry, Eddie.




Edward shot out of bed, holding his head in his hands and sweating. He took a few deep breaths and stared at the floor, he'd had this dream before, the dream that was more than a dream, it was truth. He hadn't seen it, but this was how James died, murdered in his room by that same bastard who Edward once thought was his friend.

But that was over now, he had to get over it, there wasn't anything he could have done. His first love was gone, but he still had a life of his own to live.

"Edward?" A female voice from the living room yelled out for him, obviously he had made a little bit of noise. He threw on a pair of jeans and a tank top in around two seconds and then appeared in the middle of the apartment.

"God, wait a few seconds before you yell at me," he responded to the red-haired woman. She chuckled and gestured to a seat opposite her, a meal already prepared. Maria was still in her pajamas, a long t-shirt over her underwear. He didn't mind, hell, she could walk around naked for all he cared, he paid the rent, she provided him with company, something that was hard to get when you were a giant asshole who got off on other people's suffering.

"Good morning, how was your day yesterday?" She asked, ignoring his snarky comment.

"Fantastic, I punched a giant rat in the face," he responded before beginning to eat at least fifteen spoonfuls a second.

"I saw, I thought you missed and the other guy did it." He snorted in response.

"Your brother got anything going on?" he asked hopefully, her brother was really cute.

"He's not gay, Edward, even if he was he wouldn't go for you," she said, insulting him playfully.

"Yeah, yeah, don't you have a whole football team to be having sex with?" he said as he stood up and tossed the bowl in the sink.

"Ha ha..." she laughed sarcastically. Suddenly she stopped talking and gave a sad, contemplative look. Edward tilted his head and gave her a confused glare.

"What?"

"Oh, it's nothing," she lied, poorly. Edward sat back down and looked at her.

"No it's not, tell me," he almost begged. "I am your only friend, right?"

She laughed again, but it felt fake this time.

"No... I know you had that dream again, I heard you talking in your sleep."

Embarrassing, but whatever, at least it wasn't last night's dream, now that would have been mortifying.

Edward frowned and looked closer. Maria attempted to evade his eyes and look out the window.

"I heard rumors... about your friend from Wales,"

Edward immediately knew what she was talking about.

"The one from my dream?" he attempted to clarify, and she gave him a nod in confirmation. His stomach dropped and he felt angrier than he had felt in the last few years. "What about him?" His voice dropped an octave and he almost growled. Maria dropped her head in response.

"I heard he's in Epic City."

Emotions welled up through Edward's entire body, his hands shook on the table. He sniffed and stood slowly. His mind was filled with rage-fueled thoughts of revenge.

"I'm leaving."

"Wait, Edward wai-" Edward threw on a jacket and left the room.

He ended up on top of the building, sitting and staring out over the city. He was calming slowly, though his hands still shook with both shock and anger.

I'll find him, I have to find him.
After his punch, Comet slid to a stop with the aid of a nearby building, crashing into it and smashing through the front windows. He growled as the glass cut into his arm, if he had been going faster it would have been worse, but at the speed he was going it was more like a paper cut than anything else.

He finally came to a stop by careening through a counter and tripping over a chair.

Normally he was more graceful, but the fact that he couldn't see through the giant-ass rat was a big factor.

He had suffered a few light bruises, but the little wounds that he had still managed to hurt like hell. He sat there in a pile of rubble for a moment before slowly climbing to his feet. Much to his pleasure, he noticed that he had managed to do quite a bit of damage, though the flames showed that he had received a little help. He'd have to give his thanks.

"Use the portals, hit its tail from the blind spot!"

Comet rotated his wrist as he heard someone yell. It was pretty sore after that punch, he'd rather not get back into the fight immediately. Thankfully, there was no need to, as Stark Crusader quickly took care of the rat-beast.

Comet smiled and jumped out of the room.

"Yes! What a rush, eh?" He yelled to no-one in particular. A moment later he appeared beside Dragon Heart with phone in hand. "Smile!" He said just as the camera flashed.

Looking over at the Rat King's corpse, he felt a sense of unease, he never knew rats to be extremely resilient, but he couldn't be certain until the body was out of sight and mind. Grabbing it in his hands, he took off in the direction of the ocean. It took a minute or two, but before long he was there, Atlantic Ocean, hopefully dropping it off here would be enough to insure the Rat King never returned.

With a groan, he heaved the beast over his head, made much easier by the speed he was travelling at, and tossed it straight down, into the depths of the ocean. With a nod, he slid along the surface of the ocean as he turned, kicking up a large wall of water.

Hopefully no-one minded this action all that much, it was the only way to be entirely sure that the thing didn't come back. If it did, well, then god didn't exist.

Comet reappeared around seven minutes after he had left, only now beginning to sweat from the large amount of running he had done. He walked over to be in the center of the group of heroes.

"God that was fun, who was that who was slinging fire around? I need to give you a possibly sexually-charged hug."

@RoflsMazoy
@Regitnui IT BEGINS.
@Lord Orgasmo your dad plays d&d? Jealous.
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