Name
Nikolai Ian Zabrecky
Nickames
Nik or Niki, these are prefered to Nikolai
Age
16, Feb 27
Gender
Non-binary, assigned male at birth
Sexuality
Pansexual
Relationship Status
Never-been-kissed single virgin by day
Secretly talking to a Rosefell boy in DMs by night
Secretly talking to a Rosefell boy in DMs by night
Label
The Quiet One/Misfit
Appearance Details
- Hair: Shoulder-length salted caramel waves
- Eyes: Brown
- Height: 5’10
- Body Type: Thin and lanky, sometimes to an unhealthy extent
- Clothing Style: Niki’s style could be described as somewhat bohemian with a preference for oversized clothes in neutral colors that hide their body. A trained eye could tell that they certainly have a taste for fashion, but they are holding themselves back from truly expressing themselves with it. That trained eye would be correct in this assumption, as Nik really enjoys the culture of fashion and follows many models, brands, and trends on social media. They even have a sewing machine that they have tried to make their own clothes on before… but none of these pieces have seen the light of day. Not yet, at least.
- Makeup Wise: They want to wear it publicly but thus far have only done so with tinted chapsticks and barely there nude eyeshadows. In the safety of their bedroom, though, they experiment with colors and trying to recreate looks that they find on Instagram.
- Scars, Tattoos and/or Piercings: Nik occasionally wears a septum ring and has a scar on their left eyebrow from an old piercing that healed over. Nik also has a collection of self-inflicted scars along their forearms and thighs which they keep hidden under long sleeves, even in the warmer months.
Personality Traits
{{ GENUINE • INSECURE • OBSESSIVE • OPEN-MINDED • EFFEMINATE • IMAGINATIVE • ANXIOUS }}
Niki typically goes through life as a wallflower, quietly blending in with baggy clothes in muted colors. They don’t want to be noticed, not really. If someone does happen to notice them, that person will find a kind hearted and open-minded individual, despite their brokenness, perhaps even because of it. Silent and introverted, Nik much prefers listening to talking, especially now that their voice has grown deeper, which they don’t like to hear out loud. Regardless of insecurities, listening to others’ thoughts and ideas and feelings has always been better than dwelling on one's own struggles. The teen’s quiet nature can make them seem aloof and stoic, but they are by no means judgemental or closed off, they’re just… in their own head a lot of the time. Those closest to Niki know that they will fight more to support their friends than they ever would fight for themself. This combination of traits makes a Niki a hard friend to make, but a wonderful friend to have and keep.
Biography
It was obvious to Nikolai’s parents from a very young age that their son was different. On christmas he asked for both Tonka trucks and Barbie dolls. He would go outside and catch bugs and then come inside to play princess dress up with his older sister. Kids can be like that sometimes, so his parents didn’t think much of it. The other children didn’t seem to mind, so why should they, if Nikolai was doing what made him happy?
When Nikolai was in late elementary and early middle school, things grew more complicated. The girls in his class started wearing make-up and giggling about bras and boys. Nik wanted to be like them, so he talked to his parents about this and, because they loved him, his mother took him to the store and picked out some makeup and training bras. Nik proudly wore these things to school the next day.
At first, everything went unnoticed by his peers. The makeup was subtle, and the bra hidden safely under his shirt. Nik was confident and happy, feeling pretty, like he had always wanted to feel. This happiness was short lived, however, as adolescents tend to ostracize those who stray from the social norm. Niki dared to wear a dress after convincing his mother that it would be okay, and that his friends said it would be fine. It wasn’t okay, and those ‘friends’ laughed at him. Nikolai was brutally bullied by his fellow students, physically by the boys and socially by the girls. He quickly became a social outcast, labeled ‘freak’ and ‘gay’ and whatever other unclever nicknames the kids had cooked up on any particular day.
The bullying grew so intense that Nik’s parents had to relocate the whole family so that their child could attend a different school and have a brand new start at Liberty High for freshman year of high school. Unbeknownst to them, it was already too late, the internal damage had been done. Nikolai had become a different person; Their once bright and colorful child had faded to grey. The criticisms of his peers had become his own, yet amplified. The older he got, the less he felt like a he… but not completely like she, either. They became they, and they became no one.
A new school did little to improve Nik’s quality of life. They went to class and did their homework, because they had to. They came home and sat alone in their room, avoiding their parents and what few friends they had still managed to keep. Sometimes they would stare at the full length mirror behind their door for hours, a black sharpie in hand that they used to draw X’s above all of the flaws in their reflection. No one is sure when those markered X’s on the mirror turned into razor kisses on their skin, but they did. Niki intentionally picked out and wore baggy clothing to hide the scars and marks, and also to camouflage their body.
This downhill spiral of unseen psychological warfare and battles with self-harm led to where these struggles unfortunately sometimes do lead. Halfway through the spring semester of their sophomore year, Nik switched directions and intentionally cut deeper. Whether it was the sight of so much blood, or the sheer loss of it, Niki passed out almost immediately. They awoke in a hospital bed, confused and bandaged up with a very forlorn looking mother and father staring back at them. After a period of physical healing, Nik was checked into Treewit Psychiatric Hospital for Adolescents, where they were diagnosed with and treated for depression and anxiety related to Gender Dysphoria and disordered eating related to Body Dysmophic Disorder.
Their grades were good enough that they didn’t have to repeat sophomore year, but they did not return to Liberty High to take their final exams, and instead took them from their facility. Nik was released from Treewit midway through summer vacation where they spent most of their time healing and focusing on their hobbies: crafting, sewing, reading fantasy novels, and spending way too much time on the internet. Niki only met with his closest friends from Liberty High during the summer, who informed them that their school was closing and they’d be headed to Rosefell High in the fall instead. As for all of Niki’s other peers and classmates, they have not interacted with them since the day before Nik’s brush with death and mysterious disappearance from school. This will, no doubt, be a topic of gossip when they finally do return to the school halls. Or maybe… nobody but Nik’s best friends even noticed that they were gone.
When Nikolai was in late elementary and early middle school, things grew more complicated. The girls in his class started wearing make-up and giggling about bras and boys. Nik wanted to be like them, so he talked to his parents about this and, because they loved him, his mother took him to the store and picked out some makeup and training bras. Nik proudly wore these things to school the next day.
At first, everything went unnoticed by his peers. The makeup was subtle, and the bra hidden safely under his shirt. Nik was confident and happy, feeling pretty, like he had always wanted to feel. This happiness was short lived, however, as adolescents tend to ostracize those who stray from the social norm. Niki dared to wear a dress after convincing his mother that it would be okay, and that his friends said it would be fine. It wasn’t okay, and those ‘friends’ laughed at him. Nikolai was brutally bullied by his fellow students, physically by the boys and socially by the girls. He quickly became a social outcast, labeled ‘freak’ and ‘gay’ and whatever other unclever nicknames the kids had cooked up on any particular day.
The bullying grew so intense that Nik’s parents had to relocate the whole family so that their child could attend a different school and have a brand new start at Liberty High for freshman year of high school. Unbeknownst to them, it was already too late, the internal damage had been done. Nikolai had become a different person; Their once bright and colorful child had faded to grey. The criticisms of his peers had become his own, yet amplified. The older he got, the less he felt like a he… but not completely like she, either. They became they, and they became no one.
A new school did little to improve Nik’s quality of life. They went to class and did their homework, because they had to. They came home and sat alone in their room, avoiding their parents and what few friends they had still managed to keep. Sometimes they would stare at the full length mirror behind their door for hours, a black sharpie in hand that they used to draw X’s above all of the flaws in their reflection. No one is sure when those markered X’s on the mirror turned into razor kisses on their skin, but they did. Niki intentionally picked out and wore baggy clothing to hide the scars and marks, and also to camouflage their body.
This downhill spiral of unseen psychological warfare and battles with self-harm led to where these struggles unfortunately sometimes do lead. Halfway through the spring semester of their sophomore year, Nik switched directions and intentionally cut deeper. Whether it was the sight of so much blood, or the sheer loss of it, Niki passed out almost immediately. They awoke in a hospital bed, confused and bandaged up with a very forlorn looking mother and father staring back at them. After a period of physical healing, Nik was checked into Treewit Psychiatric Hospital for Adolescents, where they were diagnosed with and treated for depression and anxiety related to Gender Dysphoria and disordered eating related to Body Dysmophic Disorder.
Their grades were good enough that they didn’t have to repeat sophomore year, but they did not return to Liberty High to take their final exams, and instead took them from their facility. Nik was released from Treewit midway through summer vacation where they spent most of their time healing and focusing on their hobbies: crafting, sewing, reading fantasy novels, and spending way too much time on the internet. Niki only met with his closest friends from Liberty High during the summer, who informed them that their school was closing and they’d be headed to Rosefell High in the fall instead. As for all of Niki’s other peers and classmates, they have not interacted with them since the day before Nik’s brush with death and mysterious disappearance from school. This will, no doubt, be a topic of gossip when they finally do return to the school halls. Or maybe… nobody but Nik’s best friends even noticed that they were gone.
Family
Mother — Anna Zabrecky (Wedding Planner) | Father — Bernard Zabrecky (Accountant) | Sister — TBA
Misc.
- Transgender — Niki currently prefers they/their pronouns because their gender identity is still undetermined and non-binary.
- Overly self critical — This sometimes manifests physically in the form of nail biting, skin picking, and other self-harming behaviors.
- Mirrors — Nik is either obsessively looking in them to analyze their reflection, or obsessively avoiding them in shame of their own appearance.
- Disordered eating — Niki goes through bouts of complete avoidance of food as a means to cope with their discontent in their own body. It is not that Niki sees themself as overweight, it is the incessant recurring negative thoughts about their own body being imperfect and mismatched that pushes Nik to change it. As plastic surgery isn’t an option yet, eating is something that Niki can and does limit to alter their appearance.
- FC: Stav Strashko | CC: E9967A | Font: Whitelist
𝙽𝚒𝚔𝚒'𝚜 𝚁𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚁𝚘𝚜𝚎𝚏𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚂𝚝𝚞𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜𝙷𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚀𝚞𝚒𝚗𝚗
“Everyone has secrets, and I guess Wade is one of mine. I don’t know how it happened, really, and I'm still not sure it isn’t all just a dream I’ve made up. Part of my recovery is trying to build my confidence, and my therapist wanted me to try something new to do so. So, I made myself an Instagram account… under an alias, of course. I posted pictures of myself in looks I’d never dare to wear at school, and that’s when Wade came into my life. First it was just a like here or there, and then some comments, and then the next thing I knew I was only ever checking my phone to see if I had a DM from him. I’ve shared parts of myself with him that I haven’t shared with anyone else, figuratively and literally, because it’s easy to do that behind a screen. I feel safe with Wade, because I’ll never meet him for real, so I don’t have to be afraid of getting hurt. He’ll always be the perfect boy in my head that is the best part of waking up every morning, and says the last words I read every night.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝙻𝚒𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚝𝚢 𝚂𝚝𝚞𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜𝙵𝚒𝚊𝚖𝚖𝚊 𝙶𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚞𝚕𝚕𝚒
“Listening to Fi play her violin does more to ease my anxiety than any meds that they could have prescribed me at Treewit. I’m so lucky to have found such a kind-hearted, devoted, beautiful best friend, and I don’t know where I’d be if I didn’t sit next to Fiamma during homeroom in freshman year. I’m so glad I was brave enough to introduce myself, because with Fiamma by my side, I feel almost normal. We have sleepovers where we stay up too late watching trashy reality TV, eating way too much junk food, doing each other’s hair, and then singing karaoke into the hairbrushes we were just using. The only stipulation is that I have to sleep in the guest bedroom at the end of the night, you know, because I’m not actually normal. But being friends with Fiamma makes me think that, maybe someday… I could be. And also, I would totally murder her if it meant I could have hair that gorgeous. Just kidding, of course …unless?”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝙰𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚊 𝚉𝚊𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚔𝚢
“It's cliche to say things like 'family is everything', but it's so true when it comes to Alina. My sister is my everything. I idolized her when we were growing up and she shaped me into who I am today. She protected me in every way that she knew how to in school, to her own detriment at times, and I can never thank her enough for that. I hope she knows how much I appreciate her, and that my demons are my own and they're not something that she can help me with. The fact that she was the one who found me when... when I... Well, I'll never forgive myself for what I did to her that night. She's changed so much. I didn't mean to hurt you Ali, it's not your fault. I promise, promise, promise to make it up to you, if I ever can. Hopefully Rosefell is the fresh start that we both so desperately need.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝚁𝚒𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚎𝚍𝚛𝚒𝚔𝚜𝚘𝚗
“You wouldn't expect people like Richie and myself to be on good terms. Him being the rich, preppy, popular, superfuckinggorgeous golden boy and me being well... me. A nobody. But, believe it or not... I think Richie might be one of the good guys? My family relocated to Columbus to try to avoid the kind of bullying that I endured in middles school, but it inevitably occurred at Liberty too. That is, until Richie stepped in. He doesn't just have a jawline like Superman, he kind of is a hero in his own right. He is to me, at least. That said, I can't be sure it isn't all just an elaborate prank and that one day he will show his true colors. It wouldn't be the first time someone in his station did something that cruel. Not all that glitters is gold, as they say.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝙰𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚍
“Ah yes, I know about Fi's secret. Not because she told me, but because I figured it out. One of the perks of being a wallflower is how skilled you become at observing people. It was so obvious to me when something changed between my bestie and Aiden. You see, Aiden used to be kind of a piece of shit. Fiamma and him would often engage in glare-offs in the hallway and there was just a general sense of disdain between them. And then... there wasn't anymore. No glares, no snide remarks. Fi started to act nervous around him, blushing like an absolute virgin, too. That's when I pressed her and learned that she wasn't anymore, a virgin, that is. After learning about her dirty little secret, I became Fi's cover story whenever she wanted to spend time with Aiden. As for how I feel about him, well... I trust Fiamma with my life. So, if he makes her happy, that's all that matters to me. If he ever stops making her happy, then we'll have a problem on our hands.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝙴𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢 𝙱𝚊𝚡𝚝𝚎𝚛
“I used to play soccer when I was a kid, but my athletic tendencies died out long before middle school. Nowadays, I'm kind of a gym class zero and, as such, I'm usually picked last in gym class for things. At least, that was the case, until I met Emily in freshman year. She was the angel that came to my rescue and has been ever since. Emily challenges me to be a better version of myself, to push my limits, and to never talk down on myself. Her boldness and confidence is something that I idolize and envy, I wish I could be like her. Maybe someday I will be, but until then, I will be her shopping buddy and help level up her style like she levels up my self esteem.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥𝙼𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚘𝚜 𝙺𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚕𝚎𝚢
“Fiamma seems to think that Marcos is a nice guy, but Fi sees the best in everyone. My sister, on the other hand, despises Marcos. I guess that leaves me somewhere in between. Marcos hasn't come at me at all, so I have no personal grudge... but, I have heard the stories of his heartbreaker past. One notable story is how he humiliated Juno by asking her out in front of a bunch of students but it was all just a prank. A bully is a bully, and that's just a shitty thing to be, no matter how fierce your jawline is.”𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✔✔✔✔✔ 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚟𝚊𝚕 ✖✖✖✖✖ 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 ♥♥♥♥♥