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11 mos ago
Current @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3 likes
11 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6 likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3 likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.

Bio

No longer an asshole!

Most Recent Posts

It seemed that Brandy was the type that preferred other stuff in her coffee...a luxury Alice didn't afford much of growing up, seeing as her family was kinda dirt poor. But hey, now she knew! Giving her satyr friend a reassuring pat on the head while she balked at the bitter aroma of black coffee, Alice let out a tiny chuckle. "Its more for the waking up effect it has," she said, ears twitching as she raised the mug back to her own lips and finishing her coffee off. "I think that we should head back to Litroot. Getting into a fight with a Necromancer was fun and all, but I still think we're not quite ready for big jobs on the regular," Alice said, starting to brush her tail.

Despite Sofia's best efforts, she wasn't able to escape the awkward situation in time, as Brandy ran right into her and bowled the undead over. The undead was thankful that her head hadn't come off, but it was certainly in a compromising position. "I-I am SO sorry! I'd meant to bring you two breakfast but you seemed busy," she said, the loaves of bread at least making it out okay in the chaos...but the water she brought was spilt all over the undead's clothes.

Alice would hear the ruckus and come out, tilting her head as she observed the two. "Brandy, you really need to slow down...C'mon Sofia, let's get you dried off," Alice said, helping the two up and promptly dragging Sofia inside to give her a change of clothes. Admittedly they were Alice's, but they seemed to fit alright enough on the undead. A little tight in the chest, but otherwise manageable. Now she looked more like a farm girl than a ranger in a cotton dress. "I-I have clothes of my own! A-Aren't my legs showing a bit too much?" the revenant stammered, tugging the hem of her skirt to try and hide more of her thighs.

"This is showing WAY less skin than your armor does though...," Alice said, pulling Sofia out and showing Brandy the slightly less edgy Revenant's temporary clothes. "Me and Brandy were talking, and I think we should head back to Litroot. What do you think Sofia?"

Sofia was fiddling with her skirt, grumbling: "Hate skirts..." while she fidgeted. She'd answer after a moment though, still a bit self conscious as she said: "Seeing as I have chosen you two as my party, I'll abide by any decisions made. After all, you are my seniors," Sofia said, also adding: "Plus...I'm a touch sick of Gnarlton. ...I have some bad memories from here."
Liliana

@Enkryption, @Restalaan, @AzureKnight, @Hammerman


With a queen at her back and a noble stee(d)r beneath her, Liliana had never felt like such a proper knight before. Now all she needed to complete the picture was a set of rose pink armor and a nice, convenient breeze through her hair. Because after all, no knight she'd ever read about wore a helmet!

Riding with no indication of where Takeshi even was, she would only be able to follow Alice's directions and coming upon the scene of the battle, the cow making a sharp turn that was impossible for an ordinary bovine. Huffing proudly, it would then proceed to collapse and pant for its life after Liliana and Alice got off, the fairy gently patting its side. "You did great, my noble steed! I promise that if I ever summon you again, I won't have you run so long," she said sweetly while the cow faded away, the summon wearing off.

After proving that Summon Cow was, indeed, the greatest spell, Liliana would proudly stand before the members of the task force, Yurine, Takeshi, and their adversaries before pulling her sword from her back. "Watch out everyone, I'm at least a hundred...no...a hundred and one times stronger now!-" she said, before Hinami promptly launched herself at one of the enemy spearmen, and uh...

Yeah, that guy's dead. Like, super dead. Like, raised the age rating of an rp that was based on an 18+ concept somehow dead.

The jubilant fairy was speechless, a touch pale as she saw that. The friendly hobgoblin she'd met a while back was distracting her but...wasn't this how undead used to act? Shaking off that feeling, Liliana would charge into battle against the other Dragon Warrior, letting Gringor focus a bit better without three enemies to worry about. From the moment her sword touched the Dragon Warrior's though, she could sense a great disparity in their swordsmanship. Just fighting with her sword was out of the question.

...But, she knew now from her training that she wasn't that great a swordsman. Or magician. Or strategian. Or fistfighter. ...Or uh...but...

But none of that mattered! Because now, Liliana had the confidence that she could defeat absolutely anyone in a way that only she could. "Whimsy, pretty please with cherries on top!" she pleaded, narrowly parrying a blow meant to take her head off before magic surged in her blade, then channeled back down to her arms. Before, she'd learned that she could "stack" spells onto her own body, like Anti-Magic field and Haste, but this time she was going to try using an offensive spell.

"One..." the fairy said as her wooden sword seemed to catch fire, a white hot torrent of magma beginning to swell up from the hilt of her blade. "Two," Liliana said, before fading from sight entirely, the only indication she was there now being the extreme heat her blade exuded. "Three! Now I'm unbeatable! Wah-Ha-Ha!" the fairy shouted, giving away her position and promptly receiving a slash to where her throat would be, a magical barrier in the form of a thick pane of glass taking the blow before the magic-cutting blades of the Dragon Warrior tore right through it.

"Wah! That's cheating!" the invisible cheating fairy exclaimed, having narrowly avoided the blow by using Size Trick to shrink herself. Now an invisible, flaming, annoyed annoyance, Liliana would fly around the Dragon Warrior, proving nearly impossible to hit as she slashed away at his body, mostly at his wrist to try and disarm him. "Gaia Hazard: Magma Fly!"

Eula

@Rezod92, @Xaltwind


Eula's pleasant walk back to the village was interrupted, the automaton finding herself lost in memories and space itself, as she was suddenly being accosted by four armed ruffians. Varjans, from the make of their equipment. It seemed they wanted information, and thought the lone young woman ("young being relative when you're a robot") would make for an easy target. Three of them seemed rather weak, as far as human warriors went, but the larger, more decorated and armed man would potentially prove problematic.

Just as Eula's fingers twitched, ready to begin disarming them and stunning them, a familiar looking hornet woman blindsided one of them. Now was no time to hesitate, as Eula promptly grabbed the face of one of the Varjan shield-bearers and unleashed a small lancet of stunning demonic energy, before immediately tossing him like a projectile at the most dangerous looking target. With mechanical precision the grown man would be hurtled towards his superior, before Eula stopped and picked up the dropped shield from her human fastball. She would use it to block a slash from the already armed swordsman, before breaking away from him and going after the elite soldier.

"My apologies, but I'll take the one with the mace," she said as she passed Kerry, preparing to duel the most dangerous target. With a shield, she'd at least be able to avoid having one of her arms damaged again, and she'd likely have to disarm her opponent. She didn't know if Varjan steel resisted magic, but now that her magic bolt had been seen once, it was unlikely that she'd get a chance to use it on him.

To Relica, an accomplished engineer, the sight of an Automaton with a non-standard model might prove an interesting sight. Usually they focused solely on ranged attacks, but this one was diving headlong into melee.
Liliana



@Enkryption
"...Ha...Mm...Nn...Nnnnn..." Liliana grumbled, having worked up the will to leave her flower at the training grounds and return, only to find a comfy flower to mope in cradled amongst a pile of weeds. She was still rather upset with how her training had ended, and that Shizuka's advice boiled down to: "Sure, you may be the literal worst fighter of the entire group training, but you're special! Just work on what you're good at!"

...What do you work on when you're good for nothing?

Moping a bit harder, Liliana was actually starting to physically lose color, going monochromatic as she tried to think of what she'd done...like, at all right. Her big snake thing only made Alice's situation worse, and her magic punchy rush didn't even dent Shizuka after she made big talk about only using magic to fight. Shizuka had told her to come at her with everything she had, and she hadn't used a single directly offensive magic spell. Curling up a bit more, her wings shriveled a bit as she realized she'd disrespected him, and everyone else by holding herself back like that. Maybe the task force would be better off without her-

"After Lord Takeshi left, I saw some of my men take off after him without telling me. I have a bad feeling about this so I intend to follow."

...

...

...Takeshi was in trouble!?

The fairy sprang back to life, eyes focused on Kikyo as she spoke to Alice and the others that had returned from training. Launching herself from the flower she was in, Liliana's wilted wings sprang back to life as she rocketed towards the conversation at hand, her TOTALLY NOBLE eavesdropping renewing her vigor as color returned to her form. Feeling bad for the horse that Alice was standing atop, she would channel her magic once more into herself, focusing harder as she remembered what Shizuka said in like...specifics, this time.

"Instead of comparing yourself to others, continue to use the principles you’ve learned in this training to shape your magic in a way that feels natural to you."

"Whimsy, can I pretty please with honey on top get Giant's Strength?" the fairy asked, at which the splinter-sword on her back considered it for a moment, and would cycle magic a grand total of two times, resulting in a cow suddenly appearing under Liliana, and a burst of healing magic to erupt from her that washed over the nothing around her. Returning to human size, Liliana would suddenly ride in on a cow next to Kikyo, her tiny arms looking no different, but having the strength of ten thousand men. Enough so that she would gently pick Alice up by her legs like a goal post, saying: "Your Highness, this is no time for axe pointing and horse standing! We have to save Takeshi!"

...The sight was ridiculous to behold, but...every knight needed a steed. Even if Liliana's was just a dairy cow.
Eula



...Well.

This was certainly a day, thus far.

While the bandits were busy packing up and heading out to the temple, Eula was left...oddly baffled. This result was desirable, optimal even, so why did she have the burning urge to snap the tree beside her in half? She didn't think she was particularly vain but...

Shaking such thoughts from her head after a solid minute of thought, the automaton would gather up the abandoned supplies before she wasted too much processing power on imagining "ballistics" upgrades. She would return to her charge, and deposit the food...

And, depart without another word beyond a slight bow. She already knew that she'd been deceived yet again...but what point was there in exposing this woman? If she had the guilt to feel bad about robbing bandits, she wouldn't have lied to Eula to get their food in the first place. It wasn't likely that the bandits would return to this area for now, but...something was bugging Eula. Why was there a need for deception to begin with?

In Eula's mind, humans were proving far more complicated to understand than she'd anticipated. Good people, bad people...what was the defining characteristic? What was the discerning variable? Was all of her data worthless? Thus far, she'd only encountered rather decent farming folk before joining the task force, so the idea that there were Shizuyamans willing to deceive her and bandits that could rob others, even kill other humans...

It was a fundamental contradiction in her mind. returning to the temple, she would report that Honoka was now fine, having been given enough food to last for a few weeks, at least. With her task completed, Eula would begin considering what to do next while crouching beside a crate. Her mind would be occupied with humanity's nature, before a delicate mewling came from the right of her. Something soft brushed against her leg, as a young black cat nestled up against her. Showing no fear, this creature would rub around her leg before marching on its way.

That brief touch, that momentary warmth of life against her, was enough to make Eula smile. ...She was happy, in spite of being lied to. She didn't have to hurt anyone today.

"Well yeah, life's precious! That's why we were built to protect it, right? You and me, Eula! So long as you and I have power, we're as good as golden, or my name isn't - [STRING MISSING, ABORTING MEMORY READ]"

Her head hurt again, but...Eula wished she'd had those memories. Whoever her first friend was...they were still alive in her data banks. Her face, her voice...garbled, but there.

Rising to her feet, Eula would have the faintest of smiles on her usually frigid face, her slightly damaged arm being cradled by her intact one. She still had a lot of things worth protecting. Now, she was free to join others for more missions, or to just rest and repair her arm.
Hector Wyland



[@Croc Crush]

With a fair amount of preparation being done for the village, Hector was eyeing the Represent that Scarlett had given to him. He wasn't familiar with combat drugs or...really, drugs in general beyond some minor medicinal ones. He honestly wanted no part in whatever concoction this was but...well, Scarlett's judgement wasn't all that bad. Perhaps she had a good reason to think he'd need something like this. Lapis and Tilnak had the defensive perimeter secured, freeing up Shavis and Hector to patrol. When the Beluan woman asked whether they'd be difficult to fight, he would reply with: "Difficult to say, but the terrain is definitely to their advantage. In all likelihood, those huge gash marks indicate large frames with strong enough muscles to push through the thick mud of the swamp. But, the fact that they can't all just come on land and wipe the village out speaks to a weakness-" While Hector rambled about creatures he scarcely had information about, there was a "flaring up" from the spirit attached to Scarlett, one that indicated that an enemy had approached.

Hector was almost immediately vindicated in his decision to track Scarlett with a his magic, and would nod at Shavis' words. "Be careful not to get bitten. My healing magic can only do so much," he said, before scrambling up a nearby tree for a vantage point. Grabbing his rifle, he would double check his ammunition, load his gun, and use his sole functioning eye to look down its length. Confirming the situation at hand, he'd feel his stomach lurch a bit at the state of Scarlett's arm. ...Had one of the Makara torn it off like that? Why were her veins...pulsing? Shaking his head, he'd try his best to remember that this was more of her macabre self-mutilating magic. She was just like that, so there was no point worrying. Even if it was somewhat disgusting seeing her dig into the beast like it was a stuffed pig.

Now securely in position, Hector would whisper something under his breath, a slight flicker of movement down his arm barely visible in the shade of the tree while Herne climbed along his arm. The phantom snake would coil its tailaround his dominant hand's wrist, while the bulk of its body bound and held his gun as a stabilizer. Flicking its tongue out, Herne would peek his head to the side, swaying under the gun to check for enemies to the bottom, right, and left of Hector while he maintained focus. In its own way, Herne being weak and indiscernible was one of his greatest strengths.

Now, the two working in tandem could provide overwatch for their comrades, the spirit stuck on Scarlett's shoulder beginning to move away from her, and back to him. Its task was done, and now he needed to only focus on the Makara that might be coming.

@Sho Minazuki

Added the changes to Avant Garde. And, while I do like the idea of a servant following her around, it doesn't especially fit with her backstory now that she's left her family's fortune, and all.


Local 1%er is probably going to get kidnapped by sand pirates.
Eula



...Well, diplomacy had failed. Time to resort to the "significantly less violent than lethal" method.

Seeing as they weren't allowing her to inspect their food supply, Eula had a feeling that they were definitely hiding something. It was a minor request, one which could easily be fulfilled if one had nothing to hide. As such, the sound of Eula's knuckles clenching would be audible while she looked at the bandits around her.

But, seeing as she was of moderate intelligence and these bandits...were not, she thought to at least try one last tactic before things went south. She had no doubt that she could beat them in a fight but...doing so now would only confirm their suspicions about Yokai in general. "Actually, that's only superstition. Perhaps there are tales of some yokai devouring souls in your land, but ever since the latest Demon Lord took power, monsterfolk around the world have become more docile. For example, back during the old days, a succubus could indeed suck a man's soul out during the...'good time' you mentioned. But now, they only siphon a modicum of energy out. Allow me to present a diagram," Eula said before smashing a rock into pieces, picking up a jagged piece, and beginning to etch it into the bark.

As if she wasn't surrounded by bandits, she would calmly sketch out a diagram of how magical energy transfer worked for monsters, which...might be the steamiest thing that the bandits had seen in some time. "While it is common in some uncivilized areas for Mamono or Yokai to interact with humanity in this way, you can rest assured that the members of the task force are in control of their instincts. I myself, as an automaton, can go off of nothing but electrical charge for months at a time. Also, I would not force anyone to be my partner. ...Also, I apologize if this disappoints but..." the automaton would consider her words carefully for a moment, before slowly raising an index finger up.

"None of you are my type. However, I wouldn't be against simply being 'friends'."
With a bountiful night's rest, Alice would yawn and stretch against Brandy's bosom, unaware of where she was while the pounding headache induced by her hangover throbbed inside her brain. "Mm..." she said, ears drooping while she slowly pieced the reality of the room around her together. She was half naked, sleeping with Brandy who was lacking a bra...and she'd passed out drunk last night.

Alice would sit on the floor and think while getting her alchemical oven out, brewing herself some coffee since...really, who was going to pay an inn for garbage coffee? The hard-working folk of Gromril had a saying: "If the coffee sucks, break the cup." As such, Alice was accustomed to splurging just the tiniest bit on the beans for her coffee, the aroma of rich coffee being ground up in her mortar and pestle starting to fill the room before she started brewing. If Brandy wasn't awake already, she'd likely find that a mug of fresh hot coffee was waiting on the nearby nightstand, while Alice sipped her's in quiet bliss.

Meanwhile, Sofia would be fully dressed and up already. Wine went through her quick, and being undead, it wasn't like more poison could rot her brain any further. Seeing as her two companions had spent the night getting rather drunk (mostly Alice), she would be bringing them a tray of water and bread, to ease the hangovers they might be having.

"Alice, Brandy, I brought something for your headach-" Sofia said, before cracking the door and seeing the rather easy to misinterpret sight of Alice leaning against the table, shirt slightly open, and sipping on coffee while Brandy drank her's in bed. ...Did they...were they...?

Sofia would slowly close the door and turn around, pale cheeks flushed with color as she struggled to maintain her pure image of Alice as a smart, dependable adventurer. ...Was...she secretly a play-wolf!?

"Coffee~" Alice said while barely paying attention, hearing the door shut, unaware that Sofia's opinion of her had dropped from "Charismatic and smart leader" to: "Apex Predator when drunk."
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