Donnie woke up the following morning in one of the castle's many guest rooms, depressingly sober. He honestly had expected this castle to have at least some choice wines in the cellar. Princess Peach was a crown princess for the gods' sake! Instead, he had ended up trying to explain what alcohol he wanted to the Toad before shortly realizing that his waiter didn't even know what booze was. By the Four Celestials, that had been embarrassing. All he wanted was a good drink and he had ended up barreling straight into bizarre alternate-universe values. He even recalled the Toad being mystified at why someone would bother with such a dangerous beverage.

So first Galeem had shredded his universe to pieces and made it part of some demented cosmic tapestry. Then he had placed everyone from the worlds in said tapestry under mind control for some unknown purpose.

But worst of all, Galeem had dumped him in a world without booze. And that was unforgivable.

He sprung out of bed with his typical energy, finding his armor cleaned up from yesterday's fight with Merkava and the scraps he'd occasionally gotten into under Galeem's control. The unsightly singe was gone, for one.

He had an issue though. Sitting down in a nearby chair, he pulled up the right leg of the pajamas he had in the Madman's Luggage, only to find that the ankle bite that the black giant's minion had given him hadn't healed. And it was not only still purple, but sore. This would be annoying.

On instinct, he made to fire a Chi Burst at it, before realizing that it would probably blast a hole in the floor. For a reason he didn't understand, however, he raised both hands to cast a spell. His hands glowed, and green mist emerged around his right ankle, soothing the pain for a moment...but as the mists cleared, he noticed that the wound hadn't regenerated. This could prove more troublesome than he thought...

Wait, did he just cast Vivify? That was right, he did! He remembered that Mistweaver spell like it was the back of his hand! Donnie sprang to his feet, the strange wound forgotten about for the time being as he paced back and forth around the room in excitement. So it seemed that as time passed he would remember more spells! Would he remember how to resurrect people again? Split himself into three spirits to take on multiple targets? Redirect damage back to a target? Hit a pressure point with lethal results?

...Come to think of it, he had already remembered intermediate-level cooking skills since last night! This was a very good sign. The wound could be investigated later. Good news in Galeem's mad world was hard to come by.

Breakfast was fairly typical honestly. Eggs, bacon, etc. The castle's cuisine couldn't be more Stormwind-esque if it tried. Still, he was born in Stormwind, and eating it reminded him a bit of home.

A home that he rather despised for much of his life (at least until Anduin came to power, and even then he still detested Jaina Proudmore and the fact that her newfound racism could spread far and wide from the mind of someone in such a high place), but it wasn't like the Horde was a whole lot better. The Forsaken society had more skeletons in its closet than the amount of actual skeletons roaming the Tirisfal wilderness.

He sat through Peach's presentation...which was honestly quite disturbing. Crushing Spirits to turn them into weapons? Binding people's souls to yourself? This sounded like the things that the necromancers in Scholomance would've tried back in the day. Before they were all wiped out, of course. Hell, Frostmourne was a weapon powered by the souls of the dead, and that cursed piece of junk had caused unimaginable death and destruction once the Lich King got his hands on it.

Still, desperate times called for desperate measures. And thinking back to the fight with the black giant, he did recognize that some beings deserved such a fate. Hell, his entire career had consisted of taking down one monster after another. If he met Merkava again...

No. It wasn't worth thinking about right now. At his full power he could annihilate that giant. Once his memories came back, he'd come out on top for sure.

On that note, he went back to his food.

And a few hours later, he was outside the castle in full armor once again, rummaging through the luggage's many pockets and trying to figure out what mount to use. A war-tiger, especially weighed down by heavy armor, wouldn't be fast enough to keep up with a gas-powered machine, so the kitty was out. The Dwarven flying machine was too high-maintenance. The Champion's Treadblade was cool and all but he'd rather fly. Mimiron's Head, as a Titan-forged flying machine of sorts, was advanced enough to fit the bill...but then there was the Disc of The Red Cloud, which would be easier for hit-and-run tactics. What to do...?

”GENO. NEW GUY. SCOUT AHEAD FOR TROUBLE IF YOU'RE FAST ENOUGH, BUT ACTUALLY COME WARN US ABOUT THE STUFF YOU FIND THIS TIME! THAT MEANS YOU PUPPET.”

And that was Bowser shouting louder than than a megaphone. Well, he was fast enough. But scouting was more a rogue's thing. Still, not many people here could fly so it would certainly help.

"Give me a sec!" the monk called back from across the convoy. "I need to choose my mount!"

Okay, so for scouting he needed a mount that was silent, and would work in combat so that he could defend himself easily when seen. The Disc of the Red Cloud fit the bill.

But as he made to pull out its orb...

First, there was a honking sound. Then, he heard Bowser shout at the top of his lungs (he didn't think it was possible for him to get any louder then he normally was, but he somehow did), "MOUNT UP ALREADY YOU MOOKS, OR GET LEFT BEHIND!" Then the sound of tires squealing.

Donnie looked up, seeing Bowser just...drive away. He immediately summoned the Disc, closed and dismissed his luggage, and tore off after him, rapidly catching up.

Peach was thankfully incredibly dainty (aside from her apparent affinity for large firearms) and quite humble. Bowser was anything but. He so wanted to call the guy out, but questioning the authority of a king was a bad idea, even if that king was an idiot who took the risk of leaving men behind because he got impatient.

So he settled for shooting him a dirty look as he shot by instead.

Over the course of his journey, he attempted to scout the terrain ahead aboard the Disc, and he'd come back every now and then to warn his allies about upcoming hazards and such, potentially coming across the heavily-armed cars and warning the party in advance.

However, one way or another the party came across the cars. The ramshackle vehicles reminded him of something an enterprising goblin mechanic would build in order to fool a particularly stupid customer, but somehow even shittier than that. And goblin engineering was a low bar to pass, since goblins were infamous for giving absolutely no shits about the quality of their products. In fact, he was pretty sure that a few of them actively tried to get their merchandise to explode for seemingly no reason, just because they found it funny. Moral of the story: Don't buy from goblins. EVER.

Where was he? Oh right, dealing with these punks. His eyes widened as he saw what the enemy drivers were trying to do. They were going to ram the karts! There was no way they'd survive an impact from something that size!

Thinking fast, he made to light up any car he could hit with rapid-fire Chi Bursts, using the Disc to move unpredictably and hopefully avoid taking too much enemy fire as he did so. He was sure that the occupants had guns too, and if there was a passenger in there, they wouldn't hesitate to fire on him.

Mounted combat, and especially flying mounted combat, weren't Donnie's forte. He was mainly an infantry unit in all honesty. So it was expected when most of his Chi Bursts missed. Of ten, only three hit their target. The first managed to destroy one of the cars' chainguns, and with the second shot, he killed the front passenger on that side. He could tell because his corpse tumbled out of the car shortly afterwards, likely kicked out by a driver who didn't want a dead body to distract him. A lucky hit from the third Chi Burst managed to blow off another car's back-left tire, leaving the rest of the axle just hanging out. The car immediately took a major hit to its handling as a result, but wasn't taken out yet.

It was a pleasant ride for Bowser, safe from the dust behind his windshield. Kamek, while also safe, did not enjoy the rather bumpy ride one bit, his old bones being shaken up something fierce by it, but it was at least preferable to driving in an exposed kart or riding a broomstick for several hours. Jr had the worst of it, buzzing along in the open topped clown car, bunny hood pulled down over his head to try and keep out the dust, while its cloak section flapping in the wind behind him. He’d overtaken the Bowser Mobile relatively early on, and anyone not wanting to eat the car’s dust would be advised to do the same. He ended up more or less leading the pack by virtue of being the second to move out and his intimate familiarity with his little car’s capabilities.

Along with them was the Rabbids’ scrappy supply truck, its trailer pulled along by Koopa King kart that was driven by the Buckler. Its cargo was a shed load of basic bunny brawlers who ‘entertained’ the convoy by singing various poor interpretations of music appropriate for road trips, along with some basic supplies like rations from Peach’s castles’ kitchen, more fuel for the karts and spare parts from the junkyard. It would make a half decent bus for anyone who didn’t want to drive themselves if they didn’t mind the traveling companions they’d need to share it with to much.

Together they all rolled on forwards while up above them the sun slowly crept its way upwards towards the peak of mid day. Most hoped they’d get to this inn/shop place before noon, because the country roads they were traveling did not seem like a good place to stop for a picnic. Unfortunately there was a bit of a speed bump in the way of that, namely the hostile vehicles Kamek had spotted earlier.

Upon sighting their expected foes Bowser sped up, getting the Bowser Mobile to the front of the convoy before jerking the steering wheel of his car to the side and performing handbrake turn. The Bowser Mobile skidded to a stop in front of the rest of the team, its side presented to the attacking vehicles in order to form a barrier the team could take cover behind. It also presented the rear mounted sentry with an angle to let loose its devastating firepower. Bowser himself stepped one foot up onto the door of the car and let out a deafening roar that briefly drowned out the enemies' terrible music.

Jr meanwhile took to the skies via clown car propeller, taking him up and above the fire arcs of the vehicle's fixed guns. Kamek stayed in the car, his body still shaken by the ride. He’d do what he could from there.

With their initial defensive position set up, the koopa troop set to work making approaching it as hard as possible.

Bowser let loose a slow but steady fwump fwump fwump of fireballs aimed at their opponents approach vector. The slow speed of the projectiles meant they were easily dodge-able, but their size meant that getting hit by even one would likely be devastating and they left burning patches on the ground wherever they struck.

Jr meanwhile summoned his koopa army, causing a few dozen of the turtle troopers to spawn beneath his floating command car. ”Koopa corp, shell blitz attack!” he ordered, resulting in the koopas briefly running towards the vehicles in a counter charge before they withdrew their vulnerable parts into their shells and began skimming along the surface of the terrain. This green shell onslaught would have been a terrifying barrage for any Mario karter and would, hopefully, be at least somewhat disruptive to their enemies proper cars.

Jr himself meanwhile got out his splatter shot and began spraying it in the general direction of the cars. The ink shooter’s shots fell well short of their target initially, but the black puddles each shot left on the ground would make a dangerous oil slick like slipping hazard for any car that crossed it.

Odds where the royal’s attacks wouldn’t inflict much if any actual damage, but the sheer volume of hazards they had created would make their attacker’s approach a treacherous one if they stuck together, and make aiming at anything in particular very difficult as they swerved to avoid the entry hazards. Hopefully disrupting this suppressing fire would make shooting back a damn sight less dangerous for people actually capable of hitting stuff. Some of Rabbids did just that, hopping off of their parked lorry, which would probably fall apart if it took any damage, and onto the Bowser Mobile. There they used its door and driver as heavy cover while occasionally popping up to take pot shots at the oncoming vehicles with their blasters.

Anyone brave enough to sally out from behind the Bowser mobile to fight them meanwhile could semi safely flank round the royal’s cone of fire to strike their foes from the side or could get the jump on any who turned away from the initial charge.

Kamek meanwhile looked out over the left hand side door at the rest of the team while using Bowser’s body as cover to avoid being shot in the back of the head.

”Lets see here” he muttered to himself ”which one of you makes the best...” his eyes fell on the Centurion ”Hehe yes, you’ll do.” he said before pointing his wand at the man ”up and at em big guy!” he cried, as magical energy burst from the want and empowered the ancient warrior, increasing his size several times over till he was as large as the Koopa King himself.

His magic cast, the magi-koopa slid back down into the car’s interior to continue channeling the spell in relative safety.

Magnumus Agoston, Centurion.

Level 3 - (2/30) EXP
Location: On the Road
Word Count: 522

The Centurion saw the Koopa King set up his barrier. That was an intelligent move. It would give their ranged fighters a station to fire from and put their karts alongside for cover, and give melee fighters like himself a place to recuperate stamina and composure. Now that they had the backline established, the Centurion decided he would be the one to establish the front line. Donnie, though they hadn't been introduced to each other yet, began to fire down upon the enemy karts. Agoston had never see anything like a kart before, let alone these mechanical horseless carraiges. Some of them were armed with guns, like Micheal, Franklin, and the Courier had.

Centurion swerved around Bowser's barrier to the right. Pressing a big, red, button the drill on the front of his kart began to spin. Leaning forward, Agoston drove into the fray. One of the enemy vehicles swerved to avoid Donnie's Chi blast, and Centurion took the advantage to break the car into pieces with the drill. "Woah! Hah!" Laughing, the Centurion began playing deadly bumper cars with the enemy.

Agoston began driving around, using his phalanx ability to protect himself and any nearby allies from gunfire.

Suddenly, one of Bowser's turtle friends spoke up. The wizardy one with the big blue hat.

"What?" He turned around, not quite hearing him over the bass-blasting music and roaring engines. Sorcery suddenly began to envelop him. Before he knew it, he felt himself becoming larger! He knew the feeling already. Clambering out of his kart, he watched in awe as he grew to be the size of a small building. Fortunately, this size increasing brought his armor to size with him, so it wouldn't just pop off of him.

He gave a nod of acknowledgement to the wizard and turned. He might be slower, but he was much more maneuverable than these enemy karts giving that he could run, walk, and stop in whatever direction he wanted. Therefore he could just raise his leg or dodge out of the way if they tried to ram his feet.

Agoston also moved his legs and used his phalanx ability to interrupt enemy fire, aswell as the now several inches think amount of steel he had to protect against the now tiny bullets.

He would attempt to snag at enemy karts, heat them up with his internal energy, and fling the now molten projectile at the other vehicles. Kicking and stomping them into pieces would also work. "This is fantastic!" His booming voice echoed across the battlefield. The mounted guns could not even reach his face if they turned all the way back! In this scenario, the Centurion felt invincible, and would put himself into the fight as much as possible to protect his more vulnerable allies and smash, toss, and melt as many enemy vehicles as he could.

In this way the Centurion was also a moving piece of cover. One of his tree-trunk legs, imbued with protective energy, could be used as a shield from enemy karts and gunfire. That wizard turtles drinks were on him for the rest of time!

Well this was disappointing. Nobody bothered to offer the Courier a ride in their kart even when he had asked the group as a whole. Ratchet would have let the wasteland wanderer ride with him but the Blue Falcon he had chosen was built for maximum speed, and that meant compensating by dropping space. Just himself, and of course occasionally Clank, were overfilling the thing with no room on the sleek design for a rider on the chassis. A bit dismayed, the Courier resigned himself to riding with the rabbids, though not before spotting that box of rifle ammo produced by Princess Peach that nobody else had seen fit to snag. He grabbed the rounds and boarded the truck, ready to fire into any oncoming enemies with his Ratslayer rifle… If he could survive the annoyance of the rabbids’ singing.

”Woohoo! Now this is what I’m talking about!” Ratchet cried out, following behind Bowser’s big car in his kart. It could go faster, he just knew it! He wanted to push the pedal to the metal and take full advantage of the Blue Falcon, so he did! Feeling the wind blowing through his fur, Ratchet sped passed all his fellow heroes and into the thick of things with the marauding bandits and their ramshackle cars.

”Only five? We could take them all on!” Ratchet pulled down his goggles to protect his eyes from the rushing wind. Clank appeared, taking the wheel of the Blue Falcon kart and piloting it.

“Do not underestimate our opponents, Ratchet. Remember that most of the people Galeem has brought to this world appear to be heroes of our own calibur.”

The Bombuilder materialized in Ratchet’s hands, to which he said while cocking the gun, ”Long as we’re together little buddy, there are no heroes of our calibur!” The enemies began unloading their chain guns on the lone kart, so far ahead of its allies. Clank’s programmed piloting skills coupled with the Blue Falcon’s inherent speed kept them safe from the errant bullets, albeit only barely. A projectile whizzed by uncomfortably close to Ratchet’s long ears.

One of the unarmed buggies came careening toward them. Before it got close enough to ram them Ratchet fired off a proximity bomb, which narrowly missed the target. Still the explosion knocked the buggy off course, so they were safe from being rammed. “You appear to be aiming as though we were flying a ship in the weightlessness of space,” Clank chimed in.

”Yeah, I’m not used to shooting from a vehicle with gravity. I won’t make that mistake again.” He brought up the explosive lobbing gun for another shot, this one landing directly under the buggy as it tried backing up. The resulting explosion flipped the car over onto its top, no doubt killing the driver in the process.

”Thanks for the fun! I had a blast! Hahahaha-WOAH!” Ratchet had to duck back down to narrowly avoid a spinning blade of death as the largest of the cars nearly took him out. ”Alright, that was too close for comfort. No more Mr. Nice Lombax!” Ratchet readied his gun for another shot.

“Pardon me Ratchet, but if I may interject. My time is almost up and I will have to recharge.” Ratchet looked down at Clank, then back to the largest, most dangerous enemy car. It had already moved out of reliable range.

”Gotcha. Don’t worry about it, little buddy. The cavalry is here.” Clank vanished as Ratchet took the wheel just in time to drift out of the way of a chain gun volley. Without a copilot he could shoot, so there was only one course of action: retreat. Thankfully the rest of the group had closed in the distance so the enemy fire wasn’t entirely focused on just him.

As Ratchet sped back to regroup with the others, the Courier unplugged his ears (the only solace from the annoying as hell rabbids), explosions having caught his attention. Running to the edge he spotted what all was going on: enemy vehicles slapped together by what looked to be ramshackle chicken wire and duct tape. Good lord, even he could build a better junkyard scrap car than those things! Let’s see, Bowser was spitting fire into the fray, no surprise there. Bowser’s son deployed a bunch of footsoldiers, that was new but ok. And the funny looking wizard guy just grew the Centurion into a giant, well that’s fucking delightful.

The Courier readied his rifle and took aim, only for a bump in the sandy road to throw him off. Gah! He readied himself again, only this time an errant rabbid bumped into his knee. ”GGGRRRR!” He glared at the small creature which instantly backed off nervously in a cartoonish manner. ”Fine. Time to bring in some heavier duty firepower anyway.”

Courier Six slung his rifle over the shoulder and went to work climbing up to the top of the truck’s cab. He almost lost his grip as it swerved once but that was no problem. He hoisted himself all the way up then crouched down. His striker, the robot Bastion, appeared in its sentry turret mode. ”Fill any enemies full o’holes, Bastion! Protect the truck and Bowser’s car to keep’em off my back.”

Bastion immediately went to work, firing at whatever was closest to the rabbid’s trailer and Bowser’s car. For all intents and purposes this caravan was protected by its own personal automated sentry of death. Meanwhile the Courier was finally able to take aim, proper aim, with his Ratslayer. The target was the buggy with the tire blown off as the easiest target. Time slowed to a near still as VAST activated.

Target vehicle engine. Probability of hit: 98%. Unlikely to do a whole lot of damage that way though. The windshield is visible. Alter target, driver’s head. Accounting for range, firepower, size of target, and windshield barrier: 71%. I’d easily bet on those odds.

Two bullets shot out from the Ratslayer and time resumed its normal pace.

---

After Franklin put the strange pistol away, Ratchet interjected, explaining what he thought the weapon was. The two men turned to face him, Franklin especially interested in what he had to say. "Plasma, huh? Damn, that really is some alien shit, then." He gave the lombax a thumbs up as he moved away, grateful for the information. Linkle appeared soon afterward, questioning the fact that Michael hadn't seen a gun like the one that Franklin now had strapped to his belt. "Almost all the guns on my world are based on gunpowder. We don't have guns like that, except for in science fiction. Still, if what Ratchet said is true, using it shouldn't be too different from using a normal gun." He looked away, to the direction of the karts. "If you'll excuse me, I probably should find something to ride before I get left behind."

With that, Michael headed out to the karts, looking through them to find something that would work for him. Looking through the vehicles, what looked to be a scooter caught his attention. Hopping on it, he revved it up, and drove it in a circle for a quick test run. "Woah!" Despite its appearance, it was still quite fast. Well, guess I'll take this one...at least Trevor's not here, he'd never let me live this down.

Franklin, meanwhile, looked over to the Wario bike, making sure that it was still available. While he was less familiar with a chopper than a traditional motorcycle, it was still a fine vehicle. Before he could ride off on it, Linkle approached him, asking for him to teach her about karts. He gave a nod, walking over to the karts. "Uh, yeah, come on, I'll tell you about it."

He walked over to the nearest kart, stopping beside it. "Now, how these things actually work is pretty complicated, and I don't have time to get into that, but anyways..." He pointed to inside the kart, towards the gas pedal, the brake, and the steering wheel. "That's the accelerator, you press that to speed up. Next to it is the brake, you hit that to slow down. And there's the steering wheel, you turn it to turn the kart. These things are pretty easy to control, so don't worry too much about it, you'll get the hand of it pretty quick. We'll be on the road for a while, so you'll have plenty of time to learn how to drive it." With a nod, he headed off towards the Wario bike, hopping on and preparing to ride off with the rest of the group.

---

After everything that had happened, Franklin felt good to be back on the road, albeit an unfamiliar one. Driving had always helped calm him down, and the bike he was sitting on was certainly fun to ride. The two bike riders were on opposite ends of the convoy, using the agile bikes to act as sentries for the less agile karts. For a while, there was nothing but the sound of engines and the dust kicked up by Bowser's vehicle as they drove across the seemingly empty land. However, once the convoy entered a more open area, someone noticed them.

Michael spotted them first- what looked like cars in the distance, approaching quickly. "Aw, shit..." He could see five vehicles, all cars that looked straight out of a post-apocalypse movie. Despite their ramshackle construction, they were actual cars, not karts, and their size compared to them would mean that the karts would be crushed if they were rammed, which it looked like they were trying to do. Plus, two had guns, while one had guns and a spiked ram. As they got closer, the sound of music could be heard. Like a hunting party... Michael frowned. If they wanted to hunt them, they would have to get through him first.

The other members of the party were quick to act, letting loose a variety of attacks. Bowser spat fire and his son shot out an oil slick to trip them up. The new guy shot energy blasts from above, managing to disable one of the cars. The Centurion was hit with a spell that turned him giant, and the Courier began to fire from his position on Bowser's car. Looking towards Franklin, they shared a nod, getting ready to launch an attack of their own.

The two bikes pulled up to the side where the cars were, moving erratically to avoid gunfire. Fortunately, their guns didn't seem very accurate, and the agile bikes were fast enough to keep out of their lines of fire. Michael took out his Uzi, firing bursts at any vehicle that got too close to the convoy. He tried to aim for the windshields, trying to disable the cars by killing the drivers.

Franklin, meanwhile, took out the plasma pistol, aiming it at the car with both guns and blades, which seemed to be the biggest threat. Alright...let's see if this thing works. He pulled down the trigger, but instead of firing a shot, it began to charge, green energy accumulating on the tip of the weapon. Let's hope this doesn't explode in my face... He continued to charge the plasma pistol until it appeared to reach a limit, at which point Franklin released the trigger, sending a bright green bolt of charged plasma at the car.

Din listened to Steven Stone's explanation, before Poppi whisked her away to the surrounding forest which was full of adorable-looking pokemon. She delighted at the sight of the small leaf-covered goats, but remembered Steven's warning about them needing to be large enough to carry her if she wanted to ride. Otherwise, she would have caught one just based on how cute it was. But then what appeared to be a larger, adult version came majestically around a tree. Something about the Gogoat drew her. She made eye contact with it, and it didn't shy away. it felt like...fate. Almost instinctively, Din tossed her pokeball, and the goat morphed into a beam of light that got sucked into the ball. The ball barely seemed to struggle, returning to Din, who immediately threw the ball on the ground, summoning the Gogoat. It stood there with a majestic calm. As a Disney Princess an oracle, Din had an affinity for nature and her creatures, and maybe the Gogoat sensed that. She reached out a hand to stroke its forehead, and it seemed to welcome it. As her fingers brushed against one of Gogoat's horns, she sensed something, a connection. As if on cue, Gogoat sat down, as if beckoning Din to get on top, which she did. Once she was situated, Gogoat rose. Din gripped the horns pensively, feeling the connection again. By this time Poppi had flown off to her master, and she could hear the roar of cart engines moving away. Her desired to catch up with the party was immediately translated into the Gogoat running, yet it accelerated at just the right speed to still be predictable for Din to ride comfortably. She wondered if Gogoat could somehow sense her thoughts. Holding on tight, Din willed Gogoat to accelerate, and it complied beautifully. Rider and steed were one, and Din understood why, in the world that these pokemon came from, owning them as pets was so important.

Din was amazed that her Gogoat was able to catch up to the fleet of carts, though she saw that trouble was brewing up ahead. Her first thought was to lay down some Spells of Winter, to make it difficult for the enemy vehicles to maneuver, but it seemed as if Bowser Jr. already had that covered with the oil patches that he had created. Then Din felt like she heard a suggestion from Gogoat. Din wasn't sure if their connection was two-way, but she decided to try something unexpected. Gogoat seemed to be part plant, so what would happen if Din cast the Spell of Spring on Gogoat?

@thedman@Stern Algorithm@Stekkmen@DracoLunaris

---

Linkle listened intently to what Franklin had to say and made sure she understood it as he walked off. It was simple, but then again so had been Michaels gun advice and she hadn't quite gotten that the first time around so she wanted to make sure she'd abide by what he told her. She didn't want any more unfortunate misjudgements on her part.

As she sorted it out and heard Bowser roar that it was time to go, his big cart letting out a rumble as it pulled off. All around her the karts rumbled to life, and she hurriedly ran over and jumped on the horse shaped two-wheeler. Slamming her hand down on the button to make the majestic steed roar to life she searched around with her feet until she found something that moved and slammed down on what she thought was the accelerator.

The kart listed shamefully to the side as the other began to depart, resting on its kickstand.

---

Luckily for Linkle Franklin himself had selected a similar kart, so instead of sitting there all confused she'd just watched what he did. Twisting the handles seemed to make you go, and after a few sudden spurts and false starts Linkle sailed off after the pack.

It wasn't as though he'd tried to trick her, she thought. As she went fairly slowly across the grassy paths of the Mushroom Kingdom, she found out that all the components were there. You twisted to go fast, the little levers were to slow you down, and you turned the handles from side to side to turn. She took the opportunity while things were still calm to practice and really get a feel for it, seemingly accepting her place at the back of the pack for now and just enjoying the smooth ride, the wind on her face, and the rabbit songs that were carried back to her on that wind. Once you got used to it they really were easy to control. She'd never even been on a horse before, but she had trouble believing that it was anywhere as smooth and easy as this.

As if in response to this thought she was suddenly passed by Din, clopping along on the back of some goat creature like some kind of mythical deity. She narrowed her eyes. Starting at the back was one thing, but getting passed? No, no, no, that awoke a fire. "Okay, horsey, let's see what you can really do!" She gunned the engine and shot forward to catch up with Din.

Linkle pulled up along side her. "Hey." She said, though it was a little hard to hear anything as the engine purred and the wind whipped past her ears. "Nice goat. That one of those pokemon? I didn't know they got that big." She just assumed from the ball that they were all supposed to be little.

She hung around Din as the grass and hills gave way to dust and dirt, just in case that creature got tired and gave out. As she rode she leaned low and pulled her hood up over her head to shade herself from the suddenly scorching sun and keep the dirt thrown up by the rest of the convoy out of her eyes, though she still ended up eating a good amount of it and it started clogging up her nose something fierce.

She almost didn't see the big jump coming, only noticing it as she saw the other karts launched into the air. Seeing everyone else take it no problem she sped up and was launched over the gap. Her stomch fell all the way pout of ger chest as she flew through the ir, then right back into it as gravity caught up with her and she started her downward decent. She braced herself and landed roughly, front tire dipped a little to far forward, and nearly lost control of the vehicle but managed to wrench the thing back into balance just in time. She sighed with relief. If she could handle something like that it was safe to say she was a good kart driver. Anything the desert tried to throw at her now would be no problem.

She heard the desert's next curve ball before she saw it. Something being carried on the wind back to her, a different sound than the purr of engines, a different song than the happy singing of the rabbits. Something angry. Then she saw Bowsers big kart, visible even through the giant dust cloud it trailed in its wake, pull to the front to the front of the convoy and turn, spinning to its side to block the road. It looked like they'd finally made contact with the enemy. Linkle sped up.

She saw the others all shooting forward with their karts, going around the defensive wall Bowser had set up, but Linkle slowed down and skidded to a stop behind the kart. As confident as she felt just riding the thing she didn't feel like she had the skills needed to fight while doing so. She kicked the stand down, stood up on her kart, and jumped up onto Bowsers to seem what was going on.

Absolute mayhem, looked like. It was easy to tell who the enemy was from the way their karts were much bigger, even if what was going on was hard to see though the dust being kicked up by the battle. She still make out Donnie zipping around throwing magic at people, and it was impossible no to spot the now massive form of Agoston stomping on anything that came close. She gawked at that for a few moments, having never wanted something so badly and yet never knowing it. She needed some of whatever had dome that.

Putting her fantasies of Giga Linkle out of her head, she ran over to where Bowser was spitting fireballs into fray. Linkle withdrew that bow she'd gotten from the skeleton and decided to follow his lead, giving support fire to the one's on the front line. She withdrew and drew back one of the blocky arrows and hoped her new aiming translated to this. She didn't think the arrow would do any damage to the cars bodies, but the black wheels the things rolled around on seemed a significantly softer target. She waited for one of the ramshackle vehicles to come into Agoston's range, figuring that anything wounded within reach of his big meaty hands was just as good as dead, and as one skidded around to try and give the centurion a wide berth she let loose at the things tire to cripple it for him. Really, she just wanted to see him smash something.

The convoy did not take the oncoming threat lightly. Practically everyone hastened to put up an impromptu defense or enact an all-out assault. Floating ahead of his allies, Donnie darted to and fro as he let loose a deluge of chi blasts at the incoming cars, which for the most part swerved out of their way with surprising skill, though a couple of the blasts took unsuspecting drivers unaware and did some damage. The vehicles' mounted guns couldn't possibly strike the swift airborne fighter, but muzzle flashes and the rattle of machinegun fire confirmed the presence of additional weaponry, making unprotected flight a risky gamble even with the disc's agility.

Meanwhile, Bowser pulled up sideways to turn his larger machine into a makeshift barrier to safeguard his allies' karts, and let out a great roar. Immediately, Blazermate's sentry went to work, winging the enemy cars and inflicting low but continuous damage to their chassis. Some came to a stop behind him; others, like Tora's landship, cruised around the side of it to engage the enemy. The Nopon and his partner demonstrated their craft's defensive ability when a burst of chaingun fire crashed against Tora's shield, the near miss forcing Poppi to duck. Bright light from Tora's left caught his eye for a moment, and he glanced over to see Bowser burping up a series of slow-moving, bouncing fireballs that formed more of a hazard than an attack, which complimented his son's ink barrage well. Instead of imparting the slip of an oil slick, however, the product of Junior's scattershot ended up slowing the enemy down a notch when their tires moved through it; that said, only a couple of the cars failed to avoid the hazard anyway. Those that didn't fell victim to the koopa troop's shells, but as hard as they were, they offered little more than a bump and a jolt on contact before being crushed back into spirit form. While the father and son ended up not doing much harm, it did split the enemy force up, and gave their allies more room to work.

Onto the scene came a gigantic Centurion, who snapped up the poor sod who unwittingly got too close. After a moment Agoston's internal temperatures turned the ramshackle roadster into a heap of molten slag, which he threw at the other enemies. It did little, given the other cars' maneuverability, but with every attack the area grew more perilous to the rather outnumbered enemy force. Plus, the Centurion's Phalanx made their weapons essentially useless against the convoy's fortified position, forcing them to scatter and try to take enemies down one-on-one.

This strategy was met with little success. After patiently waiting for just the right chance, Tora fired a Boom Biter at a passing car, and the blast flipped it end over end. Ratchet played a similar hand, his Bombuilder giving him more explosives to work with, and ended up putting an enemy out of commission for good. A moment later Bastion's heavy fire lambasted targets nearest the Bowsermobile. One, already slowed by the loss of a tire and now forced to turn away, fell victim the next instant to the Courier's calculated shot. Its driver slumped over, dealt a grievous wound, and the passenger leaned over to take the wheel. The whole affair, however, made the vehicle an easy target for Franklin and Linkle, beginning with an arrow that lodged in another of its tires and culminating in a charged shot from Franklin's plasma pistol. A shockwave consumed the car on impact, rendering it totally inert, and a temptingly near prize for the Centurion. His foot came down with a tremendous crash, pancaking it in a fiery blast, though its wreckage singed and cut the giant's sole.

That left only two cars, one of which sported just a single operational chaingun to its name. Frantic cries could barely be heard over the guttural snarls of engines: “We're getting slaughtered out here! Bring in the big guns!”

As if in reply, something zoomed in from the sky. Appearing to be a fireball -or perhaps glowing balloon- shaped like the head of a clown, it narrowly missed Donnie and sped, cackling maniacally, toward the Bowsermobile. On impact, whether with its target, the Centurion, or any desperate interceptor, it blossomed into a giant fireball with a deafening KOOM.

The two remaining cars beat a quick retreat, and from the direction they were heading, reinforcements could be seen, flanked by a wall of dust and smoke. One, most likely the culprit behind the seeking bomb, was a hefty, tanklike ice cream truck sporting gatling guns and forward-facing spikes. Another, more like the first cars, appeared to be a sturdy buggy, but it wasn't its construction that set it aside. Rather, the keen-eyed hero could spot a strange-looking pair at the wheel, visually at odds with the realistic-if-grungy humans driving the other machines. Last, and by no means least, was a huge monster truck, armed to the teeth and nothing short of terrifying. Its smokestacks came up to the Centurion's chest, and as it advanced, the very earth shook beneath its impenetrable tires. After a few seconds its turret began to firing on Donnie, each high-caliber round directed by a gunner who clearly knew his stuff. When Donnie got out of the way, he swapped targets to Geno, who didn't react in time to avoid three solid bodyshots. Once the reinforcements grew close, the two fleeing cars turned back to join the attack.

Were he not covered in fur, Tora would have been white in the face. “...Mmmmehmehmehmehmeh...is that not boss? How something that big and scary not boss?” As he watched, the ice cream truck turned his way, its gatling guns spinning up. In response, Poppi floored it, accelerating toward the threat until she could fire the landship's speargun into the monster truck's chassis. “Whoaaaaaa!” both cried out as their little kart shot forward, dragged by the much bigger and faster vehicle. While this strategy meant that the enemies' guns couldn't take aim at them, the question of whether or not they would survive being dragged around by the titanic terror remained.

Ignoring the hangers-on, the drivers of the monster truck -now visibly identifiable as 'Brother Grimm' thanks to the big black letters on the hood- took aim and unleashed four giant gatling guns' worth of fire on the Centurion. He'd have to move, shrink, or else put his whole being into his Phalanx to escape the brutal ventilation of his midsection. Of course, doing so would give Brothers Grimm free reign to steamroll the Bowsermobile and anything behind it. At the same time, the Sweet Tooth ice cream truck circled around to the convoy's right, and the strange buggy along with the two survivors circled around to the left.

@DracoLunaris

---

Watching the towering man in front of her turn one of the carts into a pile of molten metal only made Linkle more determined to feed him more cars, and she was quite satisfied to see her arrow fly true and, along with Franklins weird green shooting gun, cripple another vehicle on which he could exert his wrath.

The last two enemy cars, cowed into submission by the might their team displayed, turned tail and ran like cowards calling for help.

Wait, help?

Linkle barely had time to feel good about herself before spotting, burning in the sky like Galeem, a monstrous face descending toward the Bowser Mobile. Wreathed in fire, hair wild, grinning like a maniac, she didn't even have time to process how absolutely terrifying this new monster was before deciding it needed to die.

She reached down and, emboldened by her accuracy aghast the enemy tire, grabbed another of the strange arrows. She drew back and loosed, and as the arrow pierced the flaming creature there was a massive explosion that rocked her even from that distance. The force of it knocked her off her feet, throwing her backwards into car door, but the pain in her back was nothing compare dto her ears. The sound reverberated in them like a sucker punch right to the ear drums. She reached up to the rabbit ears and squeezed them closed, much too late to prevent any of the damage.

She really should have just let Junpei cut them off!

”GAHAHAHA! THAT’S RIGHT, RUN YOU COWARDS!” Bowser shouted after the two retreating survivors after the team reduced their comrades to scrap metal.

”It’s already over?” Kamek asked as he poked his head over the side of the door just in time to spot the enemy reinforcements ”Oh. No. No it really isn't.” he said, before ducking back down into the car interior to continue buffing the centurion in relative safety.

Bowser meanwhile stepped out of the car upon seeing their new foes, his main focus on the massive monster truck.

”NOW THAT’S MORE LIKE IT!” he cackled as he activated the Mecha-Mit, is massive orange claws coming online. However it was the comparatively small ice cream truck that proved to be an immediate threat rather than the massive monster truck. The comically inappropriate battle wagon launched some kind of glowing orange clown faced projectile at the king. In response he took a defensive posture and clenched his fist, switching the power claw into a small energy shield that he brought up to block the massive shot. He was saved from the repercussions of this inadequate defense by Linkle, who shot and arrow from her pixly bow at the balloon, causing it to detonate prematurely. The explosion washed over the koopa king and his small shield in a far less dangerous fashion than it would have otherwise, but it still hurt a fair bit.

After the blast was past Bowser shook his head to clear the ringing and then glanced behind him. Despite not being hit by the blast the rabbids, and the rabbit eared Linkle, had all been pretty badly by the noise of the blast.

”Heal!” he ordered, quieter than usual, summoning the rabbid medic to do just that. Bowser had no idea if the bunny could help with their plight, but he did know he was a bit banged up from the near miss of the blast. Heel, happy that they had missed having his own eardrums shattered, did his thing, bouncing around and mashing the button on their back mounted healer pack to first top off the king’s hp and then to provide light healing for the rabbids and Linkle in an attempt to reduce their head pain.

Bowser meanwhile summoned mallet and sledge so that, if another shot came, they could try to pull of the same trick Linkle had with their hammers. Then he stood guard in case they failed. He could not afford to lose the Bowser mobile, because losing it meant walking. Also he was a touch worried Kamek might get hurt. The old turtle seemed to be both deaf enough and insulated enough behind the car door that the explosion had not done much, but if it suffered a direct hit? That would end poorly.

---

Jr meanwhile moved to get in on the action. He had expended his koopa troop for the time being, and was very sure that the goombas would be pretty worthless here, so it was time to show the team how the royal heir handled business personally. Splattershot stored and Gadbrush in hand he moved to attack the enemy cars for above in his clown car, only to be met by a hail of gunfire.

”wow wow wow” Jr cried as he jerked the controls of the clown car too and fro in order make the small inverse helicopter move erratically to avoid the gunfire. It seemed one of the wastelanders in this group had considered mounting non fixed weapons that could actually directions other than forwards on their vehicle. Atop the titanic monster truck a man with his muscular arms bare was using a swivel turret mounted machine gun as an anti air weapon. Fortunately, it looked like he was having to crouch awkwardly to get the gun to point upwards, reducing his aim a bit as the weapon was clearly meant to shoot targets around the truck’s wheels rather than above it.

After a bit of quick thinking jr ascertained that his Splattershot and paintbrush’s ink would not out-range the gun even with his height advantage, and getting in close enough to use them could prove deadly. As a result, he turned to his latest acquisition to solve the problem. A hand darted down into the bomb bay of the cart and retrieved a Pokeball, which he then tossed into the air. Then he used the Gadbrush like a baseball bat to punt the ball at the turret operator.

”Go Mimikyu” he cried, urge to do so by the universes demand that he stay on brand, as the ball soared forth and bonked the man harmlessly on the head. After impacting it split open and spilled a white energy out and onto the roof of the car, before snapping shut and flying back to its owner.

With one hand rubbing his head the gang member looked down at what the projectile had divulged, his eyes meeting those of some kind of yellow rodent. A few cm below where the man was staring Mimikyu’s actual eyes darted too and fro as it tried to work out where it was. It had a rather pleasant time in the ball all things considered, and had also had time to repair its outfit while Jr drove. Now it was standing on a horrible steel roof surrounded by loud noises and toxic fumes. It was not a pleasant place to be, particularly for the fairy side of its typing. Then the man tried to stomp on it. This did not amuse the specter one bit. It scooted out the way of the man’s boot and then used copycat to retaliate. A wooden mannequin leg shot out from the dark void that seeped out of the bottom of the Pikachu disguise and it’s foot struck the man in the groin. This amused the specter a great deal.

Enraged and with his pride hurt the man swiveled the gun turret around and opened fire on the tiny nimble target. The manikin leg was discarded and riddled with lead as the little spook darted in and around the man’s legs as he tried to shoot it while also avoiding shooting himself in the foot. Anger and gunfire deafened him to the sound of an approaching propeller blade.

Just as it seemed like the brother had gotten the Mimikyu tired out and pinned down Jr leapt from his clown car, paintbrush in hand. With a slash her cut it down the length of the man's body before landing on the truck roof and elbow barging the man’s leg. He stumbled back, his torso streaked with an thick line of neon blue goop that burns like acid where it touched, causing the gun to be pulled up and away from Mimikyu. Before he could recover jr grabbed the front end of the gun and forced it skyward so the man couldn't try and shoot or deafen him with it.

The brother screamed with wordless anger and, after failing to wrench the gun from the prince hand or shoot him with it, punched the child in the face. Jr cried in pain and then jabbed the brush blindly at the man, one hand still clinging to the gun to avoid falling off. Ink stained the offender’s striking arm. The man shook it violently in an attempt to get the goop off while simultaneously kicking Jr’s shell ineffectively.

”Mimikyu help!” jr shouted. The ghost Pokemon tilted its false head in consideration as the man and boy struggled with one-another while trying to avoid falling off the car.

edit. and then Mimikyu clawed the guy's face off

Jr groped his way along the gun till he gripped the handle for support and possible future use. He now had a gun. A real ass gun. He was a boy with a god damned gun. ”Took you long enough.” he complained. “Kyu” responded the ghost noncommittally before petting the gun affectionately and then reeled the Synapse back into the mysterious shadow realm it had inside its disguise.

The pair then used the breathing room they had acquired to check how everyone else was doing.

Magnumus Agoston, Centurion.

Level 3 - (2/30) EXP
Location: On the Road
Word Count: 417

Centurion looked on, determined, as the convoy retreated. That was too easy, he thought. It would also be a shame to have this giant effect wasted on such a small skirmish. His inner thoughts were confirmed as he saw a massive convoy approaching.

"That was just a scouting party, it seems. Here comes the real threat." His crimson eyes focused down on the intimidating monster truck. He could stare it down and- that was a lot of guns. That would be a wound that could put him out of the fight. Quickly, the Centurion considered his options. He could try and last through the beating, but he might not be able too. He could Phalanx, but that would shatter his shield for a long while, and ultimately do no good. That thing was coming straight for him with an intent to kill.

Cursing, the Centurion dodged his giant form to the side to avoid the gatling guns. The Brothers Grimm would thunder past. One of the Koopa nobility began assaulting the man on top, and would most likely defeat him. Whatever destruction that monster truck would wrought upon his allies, Centurion intended to immediately avenge. He quickly followed in it's stead, attempting to take on the metal menace with little to no help from his allies, save of course his immense size.

"Brothers Grimm! Prepare yourself for death!" He called out after them, making haste in their wake. Eventually, the Brothers Grimm would have to turn to make another pass at his allies, or perhaps he could just catch up with them normally. Centurion, being on his legs, would most likely be able to outmaneuver the monster truck, at least that was his plan.

His ultimate goal was to get his searing hands on the accursed wheeled monstrosity. He would peel off the exhaust pipes, and try and break the glass of the front window. If he could get his fingers into where the drivers sat, he could burn them alive with his newly granted abilities. All the while he would put his weight on the thing and grind his heels into the ground and try to bring it to a slow down.

Or, perhaps, he wouldn't be able to catch it, and would just chase it around for a bit. Either way, that would keep the monster truck off his allies long enough for them to destroy the other enemies and come assist him. 1 giant for another, it seemed like a fair enough trade.

@Gentlemanvaultboy @Lugubrious

Casting the Spell of Spring on the ground in front of Gogoat caused Din to sense a momentary burst of resilience in the Pokemon that she remembered feeling when they were still in the forest, suggesting that Gogoat was somehow 'tougher' in grassy areas. As Linkle pulled up next to her, Din replied, "Yeah, it's a Pokemon. I was looking for a horse, but found this guy instead. I thought you'd be looking for a heroic steed as well, but somehow that...machine suits you." Din was enjoying herself quite a bit, since she'd never ridden an animal with this much skill at such an impressive speed, but she balked as the other carts leaped a canyon, and Linkle followed suit. Din didn't know if her Gogoat could handle such a distance. She doubted a flesh and blood and...er leaf, animal could generate the speed or power needed to clear such a gap. Yet she could sense the confidence and trust in Gogoat, who seemed intent on following the others as Din wished. She decided to reciprocate Gogoat's trust and spurred it on. Gogoat gathered speed as it approached the edge, Din could feel it's powerful muscles flex and heave, coiling up like powerful springs before launching itself over the chasm. But it soon became clear that they were nowhere near clearing the edge. Din's heart jumped into her throat, but she could still feel Gogoat's trust. That was when she realized that he trusted her to do her part. Time seemed to slow as they hovered in midair at the zenith of their arc. Din looked down and saw a withered tree growing tilted off the far cliff edge. She cast Spell of Spring on the tree, causing it to grow out into the cliff. The dry soil at the base of the tree began to loosen as the roots tore up the clay, unable to find purchase in the sandy terrain. The tree began to tilt further and further into the drop, but Gogoat successfully landed on the trunk. With the tree falling, Gogoat burst forth, climbing the tree up towards the cliff in a mad dash. Fighting against time and gravity, Gogoat and Din cleared the lip as the tree went crashing down into the canyon.

Din laughed in exhilaration, bonding with Gogoat, when she saw fighting coming from ahead. As she caught up, most of the smaller enemies had been dispersed, but then a titanic terror appeared, a massive machine of death flanked by two equally deadly, but smaller vehicles. Din tried to decide what to do, but saw Tora and Poppi's landship being dragged by the car with a clown face on top. Figuring that they needed help, Din spurred Gogoat after them. She considered casting the Spell of Winter, but figured that causing the ice cream truck to slip would only endanger Tora and Poppi. She suddenly felt Gogoat exuding trust again. Unsure what else to do, Din ordered Gogoat to, "Attack!". Gogoat tilted its head down and performed Horn Leech, ramming the side of the ice cream truck in an effort to disable it. Din expected Gogoat to take some damage from the attack, but instead felt the Pokemon to be revitalized somewhat.

---

After all the heroes had left, the courtyard had fallen into a calm, with only the various fauna still around. Pokemon were grazing, interacting and playing with each other, and occasionally scaring off any monsters that got too close. All in all the place carried a rather scenic and graceful beauty. Indeed, nothing could ruin it...

"OH CRAP! I'M LATE!"

The shout disturbed the nearby creatures, and it didn't help when front door of the castle was slammed open, startling them further. The man who opened the door didn't waste a second before beginning to sprint, his feet carrying him away from the castle at a speed like no other. He spotted some fresh tracks from when the heroes' convoy had taken off, and followed it in the hopes of catching up.

Gene was quite thankful for the God Hand in that moment, as it enhanced his speed and allowed him to run at the speed of one of the karts. It got a bit tiring after a while, but he was in decent enough shape to keep up with the karts... If he caught up with them, that was. He really hoped they hadn't gone too far ahead.

The brawler thought back on the previous night. He had went to bed sadly sober, but after all that had happened, he had been more than a little exhausted. Add to that his notorious habit of being a deep sleeper, and he had awoken quite a while after all the others had already left. At first, he chocked up the quiet castle to him waking up earlier than the others, which was a miracle in and of itself. But it wasn't until he went to get breakfast in the kitchen and noticed the kitchen staff cleaning an array of dirty dishes that he realized he wasn't early; he was very, very late.

"CRAP CRAP CRAP! I'VE GOTTA CATCH UP TO THEM!" Gene shouted to no one but himself, continuing to speed forward. As he followed the tracks left behind by the karts, he noticed that the terrain had started to get rougher, and he almost tripped up a few times over the jagged rocks. Eventually, he came across a jump over a pit, and began to pick up in speed.

He took in a deep breath, sped up, and...

Leaped over the pit and landed on the other side!

Gene stopped to take a breath for a moment, laughing in amazement. He had made a few jumps like that before, even a few over multiple moving platforms hanging over a near bottomless pit, but man, he never quite got used to it. He continued forward, passing by a large plateau, when he finally saw the convoy! He had caught up with them!

He continued running forward, before stopping after noticing something odd...

There was a bunch of bandit cars attacking.

And a friggin' giant!

He stood back and watched for a moment, noticing that the giant looked similar to that Centurion guy he had met last night in the kitchen! So thankfully, that meant that guy was on their side, but the other big cars? No, those guys were definitely not friendly if them attacking the others was anything to go by. A few of the others had started attacking, a few of them handling the ice cream truck while the giant and Bowser Jr. went for the monster truck. He needed to get in there and help them!

But... Even with all his skills, he couldn't just start punching moving vehicles! He needed something, some sort of power-up so he could jump into the fray without worrying about taking damage! If only there was...

Gene facepalmed.

He had the friggin' God Hand. The thing that made him invincible.

He slapped a hand onto the Deistic Brace and prepared to take it off, while running into the fray. As soon as he was close to one of the bandit vehicles, what appeared to be a buggy piloted by a strange looking man and an orange creature, he ripped off the Brace and felt the power of a God flow through him!

"BUUUUURN!" Gene yelled, before running forward and attempting to leap onto the buggy to disable it.

In spite of Donnie missing most of his shots, those cars clearly weren't equipped to go up against all of the firepower his allies had brought to bear. He cracked a grin as the two remaining cars turned tail and drove away...only to grimace as three new cars arrived on the scene. Some sort of demented ice-cream truck out of a goblin's worst nightmares, a buggy of some kind, and an absolutely brutal-looking...what the hell even was that thing? He'd honestly never seen a car with wheels that big.

He didn't get to think more than that before he was cut off by a hail of high-caliber bullets heading his way. "Shit!" he yelled, swerving out of the firing path, barely dodging the tightly-grouped burst of fire.

Unfortunately, he also heard the loud cracking and splintering of wood nearby. Craning his neck to the flying doll, he could tell that Geno hadn't been so lucky. Thinking fast, he cast Vivify thrice in rapid succession. Donnie's hands flashed with a magical light for each cast. The signature green mist emerged around Geno's body, the wood around the three bullets' entry and exit wounds regrowing rapidly before completely closing, the internal damage completely repaired as Donnie's body felt a bit drained from that.

Geno's body may have been made of dead wood, but at the very least it was organic. Unlike holy healing, chi healing had worked on the likes of free-willed undead before. A wooden puppet would probably heal just the same: If Vivify could heal dead flesh, it could heal dead plant matter too. The main downside was that a Windwalker's chi magic was cast from the body's stamina, not from its Mana like most magic. And Donnie wasn't exactly as spry as he normally was. After the ten Chi Bursts and three Vivifies, he was already feeling his heart pound, and sweat run down his brow. He would need to conserve his strength if at all possible, and use his abilities in bursts.

He gritted his teeth as he gunned the Disc to its top speed, fully on-guard as he planned his next move at a breakneck pace. He and Geno were high-priority targets for that guy on the turret, and whoever was at the controls of that thing was good. They had led Donnie properly, compensating for both the Disc's velocity and the velocity of the monster truck. They probably would've scored at least one direct hit if Donnie was a little less agile, and with his armor's magic sealed, he didn't want to test its durability if he could help it.

He glanced below, seeing the ice-cream truck fire some kind of demonic fireball at Bowser as Linkle detonated it prematurely. There. That guy at the wheel was his best chance. If he could get onto the ice-cream truck's body, the other vehicles would have to risk hitting their ally to take him out. And if he could get the driver into melee range, he wouldn't be able to drive either, let alone aim.

Of course, this plan assumed that this bunch of killers would care about their ally. But he had to take that risk.

Descending to near ground level, Donnie came up alongside the ice-cream truck and unloaded five more Chi Bursts (a bit more slowly than previously to conserve his strength) into the driver's side door of Sweet Tooth, getting a good look at the driver inside. A large, burly man wearing a deranged-looking clown mask, its features twisted into a demented grin. And the man's head was on fire, but he didn't seem to care. And judging by the truck's weapons, the man probably had a talent for the demonic.

And besides that, the man seemed to radiate an aura of sadism, murder, and death. Donnie could practically feel the clown's sheer killing intent from here. And this...thing was going to turn that murderous intent on his allies.

In response to such a foul creature, Donnie could only mete out the punishment that the clown probably had coming by this point. If the Chi Bursts made contact (which would probably blow off the door), he'd make to bodily grab the clown and throw him out of the vehicle, opening him up for more punishment and depriving the clown of his main asset. Of course, there was the chance that the truck might swerve to hit him, which was why Donnie had made sure to fly about twenty feet away from it to its left, giving him more time to dodge.

The remaining enemy vehicles turned tail and left without so much as a token counterattack. Ratchet pumped his fist in the air and the Courier smiled triumphantly. At least until they mentioned reinforcements. ”There’s always more varmints in the woodwork, ain’t there?” The Courier prepared for the additional attackers by laying down the Eradishield generator down directly behind himself. That was with Bastion at his front in turret mode and the shield behind him, he was in good cover from two directions. He would absolutely be needing it judging from the state of the action now. Three new vehicles were coming in, one absolutely enormous, and all looked to be vastly superior to the junk cars they had already fought off. To make matters worse those same junk cars were coming back around to box the group in on the left. At least he wouldn’t have to worry about Bowser’s erratic driving throwing off his balance since the koopa king elected to just get out of the car!

Meanwhile, Ratchet perked up at the sight of the three additional vehicles heading their way. The monster truck was a complete mystery, but the other two? Something felt familiar about them. No, not the cars, the drivers! He recognized the drivers! ”Clank, are those two who I think they are?” Clank manifested and zoomed in his robotic eyes at the incoming cars, spying the drivers.

“Affirmative.”

”Hey!” Ratchet called out as loud as he could, unsure who would actually be able to hear him. ”I’ve seen two of them before! Take out that ice cream truck, he’s an insane psychopath! But the buggy is driven by two great heroes! I’ve met Jak and Daxter before and they’ll be critical help!”

Ratchet put the pedal to the metal and dashed off in his Blue Falcon kart, making a beeline straight for Jak and Daxter. He couldn’t guarantee that his allies heard him and he needed to make certain the eco warriors survived long enough to be freed. Besides, there were so many of them that the others had the other guys handled, no problem.

The Courier kept out his Ratslayer, taking careful aim and shooting at the ice cream truck and monster truck, but to no avail. The caliber on his small rifle wasn’t enough to pierce their reinforced armor. Clearly these weren’t pieced together ramshackle junk cars like the others, but were designed from the ground up for insane vehicle mayhem. The only one with a gun strong enough to do any damage to those guys would be that asshole with the anti-material rifle, but the Courier wasn’t about to ask him for help. It was time for a new strategy. He picked up the Eradshield generator and transformed Bastion into walker. On the left flank were two of the surviving junk cars, coming in to make their day worse, and he could do something about them. With a simple command Bastion tossed the Courier with great robotic strength then de-manifested. The Courier kept his hand on the pokeball containing his new friend and threw it out in front of him as he came to a dirty landing.

“Heracross!” cried the bug, holding out its arms in a sumo-like stance.

”Time t’show me what you can do, heracross! Hit those cars as hard as you fucking can!”

“Cross!” The heracross’s eyes narrowed in determination, waiting in anticipation as the cars came toward it. Then it lowered its head, pointing its large impressive horn outward. “Hera!” It began charging forward with an impressive gait. “CROSS!” The Megahorn collided into the first car head on, but the heracross wasn’t trampled underwheel. Instead it threw up its head with incredible strength, tearing the car apart while at the same time hurling it up into the air on a collision course with the second car behind it!

Heracross did not make it out of the scuffle unharmed however, and was equally tossed back from the matched force of the raider vehicle. “Croooooss!” It slammed hard on the ground, rolling over a few times, its eyes spinning in little dizzy circles. Its hard shell was scuffed and bruised. Courier Six’s eyes were wide in shock. He hadn’t expected this pokemon to be that strong! Still, it was out for the count for the time being, so he returned it to its pokeball.

”Great job, hombre. I’m glad you joined my posse-Oh shit those are bullets!” The Courier had neglected to think about how diving out from the Bowsermobile would leave him without cover in a mostly empty field with tons of enemy fire. A shot whizzed right by his head, a near miss but only because he was never the intended target to begin with. ”Shit shit shit shit shit!” he hustled back to the Bowsermobile, keeping his head down.

Ratchet had caught up to Jak in the Sand Shark just in time to see one of their newer allies, the one that showed up to kick Bowser in the face, went all angelic lightshow and went to dive straight into the duo’s car. ”Careful!” he cried out. Once again Ratchet summoned Clank in place to pilot the kart while the lombax himself took a leap toward his old rival/friend through the air, omniwrench out in an overhead strike.

Things were heating up pretty quickly upon leaving the castle and getting on the road. Since Blazermate was with Bowser in the Bowsermobile, she was near the first few to leave the castle, with the stragglers eventually catching up by either being stuck with the rabbids, riding animals, or just... running really fast. Either way, those who started the journey had quite a bit of destructive fun for awhile.

The initial amount of vehicles that assaulted them went down relatively easy all things considered. With Agoston becoming a giant of himself thanks to Kamek's magic, fire from the rabbids vehicle from Ratchet and the courier, the sentry fire from Blazermate's sentry and 6's bastion, additional arms or energy fire from linkle, michael, and a few others, a few fireballs from Bowser... Easy to say, there was only one vehicle left after the initial volley of attacks more than wiped out the Galeem goons who wanted to assault their caravan. Taht was, until their reinforcements came in a ball of fire...

A monster truck, an icecream truck, and some weird buggy thing came from the firey orb, all three looking to be heavily armed and ready to retaliate. While Din, Linkle, and the newly added Donnie had begun attacking the ice cream truck who was piloted by one scary looking clown and Gene was attacking the buggy, the giant monster truck barreled its way towards the Bowsermobile, Bowser standing in its way as the Centurian tried to attack it from behind. As the truck grew closer, Blazermate's sentry locked onto its main body and began pelting it with bullets and rockets. Since the gunfire coming from the opposition didn't seem like it was all that accurate, nor could it angle up, Blazermate took to the skies to heal who she could.

From her vantage point she had a good look of the battlefield. Donnie had healed Geno so he was fine, while 6 had jumped off his rabbid infested vehicle to command his pokemon to destroy the last remaining of the previous vehicles, leaving everyone to only have to deal with the last 3. Although a good offensive move, 6 had left himself wide open. Seeing 6 being caught up in a barrage of gunfire, Blazermate put her beam onto him to make sure he got to cover behind the Bowsermobile and her sentry. Her next target was Bowser, as getting hit full bore by a monster truck was going to huuurt, even for someone like him. With all the souls under Galeem's control, Blazermate wondered if there were any souls that would be able to enhance her supportive powers.

”IS ANYONE GOING TO DEAL WITH THAT?” Bowser asked, regarding the massive monster truck bearing down on their position ”HELLO? ANYONE?” The centurion, jr and poppy all grappled the truck in their own way, but none actually did anything that would alter its course.

The Rabbids, now healed of their ear pain, began to panic, running around like headless chickens while screaming their lungs out. They were joined in their concern by a rather more reserved ”Sire?” coming from the inside of the Bowser Mobile.

The situation was clear. It was stand here and be run over, flee like a coward and leave his minions loyal to die, or do something incredibly stupid. Boweser took the third option as naturally as he breathed.

”DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF!?” Bowser roared, before launching himself forward towards the brother’s grimm with an excellent jump. Mid flight he retracted his vulnerable body parts inside his shell, which became a spinning vertical disk that disdainfully plowed through the incoming mini-gun fire. The spinning disk of death was aimed to cleave into the right hand side of the car’s exposed steering axle in-order to smash it and force the monster truck to turn off course. The red hot claws of the mecah mit, which thirsted for it's first strike, poked out of one of the holes in the shell, adding a singular rapidly revolving fang to the massive projectile.

At the same time, back at the parked vehicles, Kamek shouted at anyone and everyone who would listen to ”Drive you idiots!” A pile of Rabbids obeyed as best they could, hurling themselves on the accelerator, causing the Browser mobile to roar away blindly. At the same time buckler Rabbid gunned the engine of the koopa king that was pulling the rabbids truck, doing their best to pull away from their now untenable defensive position.

Some time after the cages fell and a cleansing wave of translucent darkness washed over the castle, the last vivid memory of home returned in broad strokes to a pair of the freshly emancipated captives. They recalled it being a fairly uneventful day at first, much like most had long since been for them. The main exception to this was when they would annually receive a letter with an iconic seal either declining or inviting them, with the former every time being the case up to this point. After a while, they grew accustomed to the disappointment of being denied year after year, but it never quite stopped them from getting their hopes up. Having received such a letter this day, they kept their expectations in check as one of them broke the seal, but they wouldn’t get the chance to read its verdict before an infinitely more critical and alarming matter took precedence. Their only warning came in the form of a golden glow etching a gradient in the skyline only seconds before harshly overbright streams of destructive light began to pierce the mountainous cliff walls of their home land, instantly evaporating every bit of terrain and whatever else they passed through. They instinctively took to the skies in a blind effort to either approach and combat the light at its source or flee from it entirely, but were afforded a fair chance at neither. They managed in futility to evade the onslaught to a meager extent before being callously swept away with the rest of their world… and into the next.

Once they finished mentally repeating the last moments of their prior life, Banjo and Kazooie finally started to come to in full. The bear and bird had led themselves (and two others) away to sit out the battle with MegaDragonBowser, having been in no condition to participate on account of the injuries sustained during whatever events led up to their capture, and thus had no recollection of any of it. Even if the one healer (and a half) could be troubled to spare them the needed attention to restore them to fighting health, chances are they wouldn’t have been of much use in the fight in their regressed state. Just as well the company managed well enough to defeat the boss without their help, minus a couple of unfortunate and probably preventable casualties; not that they were at all aware of that. Either way, there would be little lamentation of their inaction from them. The best they could do now was to move forward with the promise that they would do better. Of course, what exactly it was they would be moving forward with they had yet to find out.

The duo used the period of recess to leisurely tour part of the castle for the next hour before dinner to better come to grips with their surroundings. They knew this place to be the famous Mushroom Kingdom, despite never having been there before, but aside from the obvious, they couldn’t figure out exactly how they arrived there. There remained a hazy (at best) blank spot in their memory much akin to the inscrutable onset of a dream that made it nigh impossible for them to ascertain their point of origin initial actions that led them here. They would soon get a better idea of what ‘here’ was when their aimless wandering brought them through the castle gardens where they found themselves mere yards from stepping off into the cosmos that stretched its way into the edge of princess’s backyard. That alone told them as much as they presently needed to know about the world they had been dropped in, and they quietly counted themselves somewhat lucky (their overall situation notwithstanding) to have some not inconsiderable measure of experience with finding their way around a disparately amalgamated world replete with exotic, colorful locales--having lived in such a world and all. Indeed, they were set for what would surely be another veritable sightseeing tour of an adventure, but would hold off on contemplating it further to discuss it over dinner as planned.

The two headed back inside so they wouldn’t be late, kicking over a few ammo nests on their walk back and collecting their contents to prevent anyone making the possible mistake of serving them. Banjo--being something of a decent cook himself--would have probably lent his own hands to the process if not for the kitchen becoming so quickly overstaffed with volunteers, so they instead kept clear and let the others do their work. The results, needless to say, were superb. One could practically taste every dish with their eyes alone, but little time was wasted by anyone grabbing their meals of choice and tasting them the right way.

During the feast/meeting, Banjo alternated between eating, drinking, and talking, keeping fresh rib steaks in one hand and a stein of some of the sweeter cask contents in the other until he finished the ribs and moved on to forking out chunks of honey-glazed fish saute by the mouthful. Kazooie helped herself to the pork katsu while also pecking bites out of a paella, and next to them was a glass filled with similarly rich contents of a different variety to what Banjo was drinking, complete with an extended straw to save her having to lift it from the table with her lack of prehensile digits (even if she provably could). Hat Kid eventually made her late arrival midway through dinner service, taking a double serving of crispy skewers, proceeded to clean the bone of a sizable tenderloin shank, and finished with a helping of cake for dessert--not bothering until the latter dish to finally pick up a fork. She quietly gushed to herself in her head about how delicious she found the confection to be upon taking her first bite of it, and took her sweet time to savor the ones that followed. If Princess Peach had any hand in making it (as she likely did), the child would have been among the privileged few in all of the multiverse to have tasted what is tacitly believed to be among a caliber of delicacies just a few steps shy of legendary, whether knew it or not.

As for the dinner discussion, planning was in order for what everyone’s next move would be, by which point everyone who needed to be had been sufficiently filled in on the grand scheme and established amongst themselves a common goal of defeating Galeem. A magically enlarged map of what was unmistakably the world was presented to all at the table with the intent of collectively setting their course/s. Naturally, Banjo and Kazooie objected to the proposed suggestion to divide their forces into halves to send up the eastern and westen sides of the map, speaking mainly for themselves on the matter. They had no qualms about whatever the others might have decided to do, should their ideas differ. More than anything else, they were just clarifying that they, specifically, wouldn’t be splitting up. Similarly, they declined to take part in the excursion to the Scrapyards to salvage vehicles on the basis of their inexperience with automotive technology, engineering, repairs or maintenance. The forced transition into the New World coupled left a few blank spots in their memory that made even them unsure as to whether or not that was entirely true. With a shared sense of deja vu, the bear and bird exchanged a curious glance once eyes were off of them.

---

As the evening’s proceedings were beginning to draw to a close, the group gradually dispersed to take care of whatever last minute business they had before turning in for the night. Some, like Banjo and Kazooie, simply went straight to bed, taking the first vacant one-bed room they could get. There, Banjo hung his backpack from the coat rack adjoining the bed, which would make for Kazooie’s resting place, and put on the bottom half of the provided sleepwear so he could leave his shorts with the housekeeping staff to be laundered. The duo conversed in brief about what was to come shortly before Banjo slid under the still tucked blankets and nodded off in a matter of seconds. Kazooie gently receded back into the confined of the pack and made herself comfortable, and she wouldn’t be far behind.

Hat Kid, meanwhile, had other plans concerning sleeping arrangements. Rather than palleting down in one of the guest rooms, she would see if she couldn’t get back into her own room on her ship. Considering it might be some time before she can board or even see it again, it only made sense for her to spend the last night that she would have with it for what could be a while. It may not have been fully-functional and in serious need of tidying up, but for her, it was home; the closest thing to it at least. She made it outside to the front door of her ship in time to see the kart salvaging crew, having apparently finished their night’s work, pull up in front of the castle bridge in reckless fashion. Whether it was an overstimulated test of the vehicles’ functionality or lapses in the operational skills of an underage driver was a matter of question, but it did remind her--on the subject of underage drivers--that she had a vehicle of her own somewhere...

Once inside, she messed around with a few console commands to reroute the reserve power from the kitchen to her room, only to find upon approaching the first doors leading to it still shut. She tapped one lightly to see if they would budge; then she pounded on them; then tried pushing them open; then pulling one; then attempted to force them open by wedging the tip of her umbrella between them like a crowbar, which only resulted in her getting flung head first into one by an overbent parasol. She stood back up after her last failed attempt and started to knock her forehead against the stubborn hatch in frustration, surprised suddenly to find no purchase after about the fourth or fifth knock and falling flat on her face. The hall entrance finally cooperated and gave way, and she hopped back up with a relieved smile painting her features as if there was no issue to begin with.

As luck would have it, the next set of doors were trying and failing to close around an obstructing object, which just happened to be her scooter. Dislodging the contraption was as simple as hopping on and pulling forward, after which she had the opposite problem from earlier with one of the doors not shutting all the way. Thankfully, it required less headache (in more than one sense) to fix; putting her back bumper and boot heel into it sufficed. Kid parked the moped next to her desk and headed straight for her hidden fort, swimming down into it through the pool of pillows that concealed it. She normally would have jumped from the diving board, if not for the pool being a little more shallow from having been scattered by turbulence, but she neither fussed nor thought anything of it. Of all the cleanup she had waiting for her, this would be much more easily corrected when she got around to it.

Once she was within the cozy, warmly lit, tent-like confines of her hideout, she sat down cross-legged on her pillow seat, opened her diary, dipped the quill, and penned in her daily entry...

Day 1...

So… I got chased by this scary light, and the next thing I know my ship gets shot down by some big, mean, stupid dragon ‘king’. Now I’m stranded (again) on a planet even weirder than the last. Me and my new friends kicked his butt, but all my timepieces are lost… AGAIN! And after all that work I had to do to get them back! Here we go again, I guess…

With the last item on her day’s agenda taken care of, she ascended back into the bedroom proper, set her hat on the nightstand, climbed into bed, pulled the covers over herself, and settled in. The lights gradually dimmed themselves off as they were set to, and Kid shut her eyes and drifted off into blissful dreamsleep.

---

Hat Kid practically ejected from her bed at the sight and sound of her morning alarm system, her landing knocked her hat from where it sat to float down perfectly onto her head. She stood up stretching and yawning the sleep from her body and brain, the sleepiness still visibly apparent in her eyes. She was hit with an odd sense of deja vu by starting her day like this, but then she remembered in her semi-groggy state that this was just part of her daily routine. She promptly restored the pep in her step, packed the saddle bag on her scooter with whatever she couldn’t fit on her, and wheeled it out the door.

In similar, but calmer fashion, the sunshine woke Kazooie, and Kazooie woke Banjo. It took her about a minute to get her partner’s attention, him being a heavy sleeper, but she was able to get him up and out of bed with little trouble. He slipped on and buckled his freshly washed shorts, slung his backpack on, and headed to the dining hall where a few were already gathered. Breakfast consisted of surprisingly standard fair for a royal house, in contrast to the exquisite and varied meal from last night--not that it was by any means an issue. No one was too good for a warm, fluffy, steaming stack of pancakes and a hearty measure of bacon, which Banjo had a reasonable helping of (sometimes in the same bite), supplanting syrup with honey to better suit his tastes. Kazooie went lighter, pecking away at an assortment of fruits and berries, and chasing them with the lightly stuffed crepes they sat on top of.

Everyone was soon called out front for Peach’s address, which started off with notice of a team reduction on account of those who chose to stay, for whatever reasons they decided to, while also welcoming the new additions to the party. When called upon by name, Banjo gave a bow while Kazooie simply waved to her new teammates. Hat Kid, however, offered no gesture beyond maintaining her default smile and continuing to watch and listen intently. The Princess then introduced a young man who lectured them with a demonstrative explanation of what ‘Pokemon’ are, at which the child’s mouth and eyes went wide with gleeful excitement. While she didn’t know why, she came down with the overwhelming sense that this was just the sort of thing children like her dreamed of, and she didn’t know she needed it in her life until now. Without demanding a specific number past one--not wishing to be greedy with her request--she happily held a hand out to Mr. Stone to receive a sampling of however many of the ‘pokeballs’ he could afford her.

Before anyone could get too excited and run off to dabble in this amazing new practice, Peach kept the group’s attention for a little longer. The brief talk of ‘Spirits’ dipped a tad into existentially morbid territory, but it was good that they all know about it in case those who have yet to deal with it ever have to. She segued into a demonstration ‘loot boxes’ that involved her feeding it some form of unrecognizable foreign currency to produce a gear drop. Banjo and Kazooie, being from an earlier era, had an expected share of misgivings regarding what struck them as a ‘pay-to-win’ system that they’d heard so much about over the years.

“Remember when you actually had to earn your upgrades... and couldn’t just BUY them?” Kazooie snidely remarked, seemingly unaware that--even back in her day--her assertion wasn’t entirely true for everyone.

“I don’t know about that,” added Banjo, “but paying for something before knowing what it is doesn’t seem like such a good idea. It’s kind of like gambling,” he commented none too subtly on a particular element of controversy that has surrounded the idea since its inception. He said this much despite the fact that him and Kazooie started their game gambling at cards (in which Kazooie, of course, cheated). Hat Kid had no such complaints. She simply picked up the hat from the loot drop, vanished it into her inventory, and proceeded towards the easternmost yard of the castle alongside Peach, who had just declared her participation in the upcoming adventure.



The eager rookie Pokemon trainers of the group broke off to get their first taste of catching them as soon as they could; Kid even spotted a few of them herself in the waters and lusher patches of greenery on her way to the parked vehicles on the far side of the castle. However, none of the present specimen really stood out to her, so she decided to hold out for when she might later happen upon some that really catch her interest. For now, all that was left for her to do was wait patiently next to her scooter for everyone else to finish their last minute affairs.

“These all look… interesting.” Banjo observed during his walkaround of the various automobiles, unsure of what to make of most of them, or who had claim on which ones. “This is what they were working on last night?”

“They could’ve worked a little harder on some of them,” Kazooie critiqued while glancing at the Koopa Troop’s rides, sensing favoritism in their workmanship and inherent quality compared to the rest, “but they’re not bad, I guess.” She took the initiative to halfway correct herself before Banjo could remind her of her manners and to express a little more gratitude.

“I’m sure they worked with what they could.” Banjo added, entertaining the honest possibility that the disparity couldn’t be helped.

“Which of these do you think is ours anyway?” They would have their answer shortly, and neither of them would be too chuffed about it. They rounded the back corner of one of the larger karts to find… it, closer to the very back of the fleet. The duo looked on in awe and disbelief at what they would previously write off as the product of false memories and recurring nightmares, now sitting right before them as real as everything else. It had an inflatable placeholder dummy in their likenesses saving their seat for them, so the intention as far as ownership was clear. Was it perhaps--however implausibly--ripped from an alternate timeline to implement in a divine jape at their expense, or did they by some chance have actual history with this contraption? Whatever the case may be, they had precious little else in the way of already dwindling options.

“Please tell me we have something better than this dinkey trolley to get around with.” Kazooie proposed desperately while shielding her eyes. Banjo removed his hand from his forehead to look around at the remaining karts being quickly assumed by other drivers.

“Erm… unless you can still fly…” he replied rhetorically, knowing full well the regressive effects of their forced reincarnation that made it go without saying.

“Alright,” conceded the breegull with a disappointed sigh, “but you’re driving.” She ended on that condition as if the alternative was possible before receding into her bagspace to settle in for the ride. Soon the call for departure went out, and everyone present mounted up on the Centurion’s order, to which Hat Kid gestured a valiant salute. (Poor Koopa King just wasn’t getting the respect he so rightfully deserved.) Without further delay, they were off.

The first several minutes of the drive passed without any setbacks whatsoever--the biggest obstacles thus far being a growing stretch of rough terrain and a mildly demanding gap jump. Thankfully, the Trolley was outfitted with a more powerful engine and off-road tires, and Kid was agile enough even on her scooter to compensate for its light build. Both vehicles carefully tailed the rest of the convoy so as to not inhale the clouds of dust being kicked up by the rest of it. The partial benefit Kid’s scooter not being bound to her Sprint Hat (the drawback being that she couldn’t pocket it) afforded her the luxury of being able to wear and utilize any of her hats while drove, which was exactly what she would do with her top hat, checking it periodically for anything of (specific) interest along the way.

The safer, more leisurely portion of their drive came swiftly to an end when the party was beset by an apparent pack of marauders, their approach given away by the cacophonous blaring of poorly produced music that preceded the galvanizing report of gatling guns. Kid slid under the Bowser Mobile for cover where she more than fit comfortably on her scooter, while Banjo--who couldn’t say the same--yanked on the brakes to come to a hard stop some single-digit yards behind them. The momentum of the kart’s halt threw the duo prone into the cargo bed (i.e. most of the vehicle) where they remained momentarily ducked down in what was effectively half cover while gunfire whizzed by closely over their heads, puncturing and deflating the decoy that popped up in their place. They were saved having to keep their heads down for too long, as their allies better equipped/suited for a mobile skirmish made good on reducing the opposition to a pair of bare buggies forced into retreat. Though, this was merely a prelude to what would undoubtedly be a bigger firefight.

The second round opening with a literal BANG as a laughing, red-hot, clown-headed balloon detonated in frightening, if not devastating proximity to the Bowser Mobile. The bear and bird peaked up from half cover just long enough to see the enemy reinforcements start rolling in. Reflexively, they ducked back down to shoot a flaming egg at the patchy stretch of black oil with intentions of setting it afire before simultaneously bailing out of their kart, tipping it over lengthwise, and hunkering behind its practically non-existent undercarriage for full cover. What they didn't realize was that they actually tried to light was in fact ink, not oil, so it was unlikely to ignite.

With the amount of ridiculous manpower dedicated solely to stopping the monster truck--unmoved from its collision course with the Bowser Mobile--Kamek and crew wisely drove out of the way, forcing Hat Kid to do the same. She made haste in pulling out from underneath the Koopa muscle car to avoid being flattened by either of the titanic machines, and as the duo notice their automotive fortifications driving away, Banjo hurried to sling the Trolley back onto its wheels to hop on and follow suit. By this time, most of the enemy vehicles were occupied with targeting others, but they would continue to stick close to their larger allies while on the move lest they hang temptingly defenseless out in the open.

After conducting a brief, cursory assessment of the battlefield, Kid decided that there was somewhere she could possibly help out, and took a considerably riskier approach. While her nor any of her weapons were strong enough on their own to even make the assailing cars budge, she wondered what would happen if she were to combine them. With this in mind, she equipped her new cap and made a long roundabout to intercept the ice cream truck head-on. Although she had yet to use her new hat’s ability, let alone be proficient with it, she innately understood its function well enough to formulate an idea for how she might use it.

Once she got a manageable distance (a few hundred yards or so) in front of the ice cream truck, accounting for its speed and trajectory to make her estimate, she would veer her scooter to the left and jump from it to place herself where Sweet Tooth’s right tires would be, dropping to ground-level for aim stability. She then drew her umbrella back in more exaggerated motion than before, charged its beam up to second or third level (whichever time and distance would allow), imbuing it with a different kind of power, and stabbed the tip toward the ground at a forty-five degree angle to fire off a rolling wave of heavy energy at the killer clown’s right wheels. At most, the wave would probably only come up to her hip in height, but maybe it could generate just enough power to force him onto two wheels to where the truck might lose control and crash helplessly onto its side. Should that fail, Kid would have to act especially fast to dodge out of the way to avoid being run over. In either case, she would rush to dive after her scooter, mount up, and get moving again.

---

The small group of lightly-armed buggies didn't last long under the combined assault. Every member of the group quickly laid into them, unleashing a barrage of attacks. The two surviving cars fled soon after, driving off into the distance. Franklin and Michael moved near the front of the convoy, stopping their bikes for a moment to watch as the two survivors drove off. Franklin lifted up the plasma pistol, watching as it cooled down from the charged shot. "Looks like it has an EMP effect. It totally shut down their car."

"I saw. That'll be helpful, if..." Michael paused, looking into the distance. "...shit, get ready. They brought backup."

As soon as the words left Michael's mouth, something flew over their heads, detonating over them with a blast of heat and fire. After shielding themselves from the heat, the two looked up to see enemy reinforcements heading their way. They were an odd group, but certainly more intimidating than the buggies from before- an armored ice cream truck, another buggy, and a giant monster truck. Their faces both went pale as the array of weapons on the enemy vehicles became clear. "Shit, we gotta move!"

The two revved up their engines, moving off in opposite directions- Michael heading left, and Franklin heading right. Fortunately, the initial barrage of gunfire wasn't aimed at either of them, and they were able to maneuver away in time. Michael, unable to do anything about the giant monster truck currently, decided to focus on the two surviving cars and the new buggy. He moved up near the two survivors, strafing them with his Uzi, attempting to take out either the drivers or the tires. From his side, he could hear Ratchet shouting to not kill the drivers of the buggy, saying that they were great heroes and would be helpful. Well, I won't say no to some more help... Seeing Gene jump on the buggy in an attempt to disable it, Michael sped up behind it and began to fire at the back wheels, also trying to disable it.

Meanwhile, Franklin had sped off to the other side, already charging his plasma pistol. He decided to trail the ice cream truck from a distance, waiting for his plasma pistol to charge up. He wasn't sure what target needed to be disabled more- the monster truck or the ice cream truck, but he had to keep moving. While he rode, he saw Donnie come up beside the ice cream truck, and the kid with the weird hat try to push it over. Looking back, he saw the monster truck and Bowser locked in a battle, the monster truck firing its miniguns at him. As the plasma pistol's charge was full, he made his decision. While the ice cream truck was a big threat, he would have to trust the others to deal with it. The monster truck, on the other hand, might be able to overpower Bowser with its weaponry, something that he couldn't allow. Turning away from the ice cream truck, he drove towards where Bowser and the monster truck were fighting, coming up behind the massive vehicle. Lifting up the glowing plasma pistol, he released the trigger, unleashing a fully charged bolt towards the monster truck.

Bleeding badly from the gashes on his face inflicted by Mimikyu's shadowy talons, the monster truck's gunner stumbled backward. He fell across the war machine's oversized exhaust stacks, took a dirty burn, and with another shout of pain toppled over into the vehicle's bed. For a moment, it looked as though Junior held free reign over the newly-unoccupied mounted turret, but all the commotion on the roof didn't go unnoticed by the driver. Scarcely could the young koopa grab the weapon and consider the onrushing visage of the Centurion before a sound could be heard from below, barely audible over the thunder of the monster truck's engine.

Kakick...

BOOM

Mr. Grimm's revolver released an ultra-condensed blast of screaming souls, ripping through the roof of his own vehicle and into Bowser Jr from below. While not equivalent to an actual high-power bullet, the anti-vehicle Death Spawn carried an incredible amount of force, more than enough to render the poor, over-courageous tyke unconscious and send him sky-high.

Meanwhile, the onslaught of Mr. Grimm's chainguns forced Agoston to step aside. Even with his enlarged armor, the Centurion would be eaten alive by the lead onslaught, but his choice left the way open for the monster truck to plow over the blockade he sought to protect. Hazards like Junior's ink -which, not being oil, quaffed Kazooie's attempt to alight it with a burning egg- provided a little obstruction, but they alone didn't make much difference. Only Bowser, and his prodigious bowsermobile, stood in the way. The Koopa King responded by launching himself into action, hurtling straight for the truck's forward axle in an incredible display of boldness, borne out of his lack of familiarity with large vehicles—if an ordinary car, after all, could jellify most living things on impact at even moderate speed, what could a behemoth like this do?

Shell met steel, and a great TONG resounded as sparks flew. At the point of impact, Bowser's shell cracked, and like an oversized hockey puck he shot away, still spinning. His target, however, did not escape unscathed. The force of the collision slowed the monster truck down and threw off its steering just enough to allow the bowsermobile and rabbid transport to scoot out of the way of certain destruction. Before it got under way, however, three rabbids managed to grab hold of the stunned Linkle and get her into the truck with them, no doubt having been looking out from the one whose long blonde-furred ears resembled their own. Banjo and Kazooie managed to right their Trolley and floor it, rushing after Hat Kid's scooter and the bigger machines. Just in the nick of time, everyone got out of the way of the Brother Grimm, which pancaked any vehicles left behind, like Linkle's bike. It made for very small consolation for Mr. Grimm, who with gritted teeth struggled to free his machine from the grip of the giant Centurion, who'd gotten a hold on his chassis from behind just after the hit from Bowser. With its prodigious strength and weight, the monster truck dragged even the enormous Agoston behind it, but its sudden loss of speed presented it with great danger.

The whole affair led Tora and Poppi into dire straights. With the sudden deceleration of the vehicle dragging them, their landship crashed into the monster truck from behind and, stuffed full of volatile modifications by its overzealous engineer, blew up. The explosion sent the sturdy pair flying, giving them a birds-eye view of their allies' efforts against the other enemies, were they not too preoccupied with fear and confusion.

Over on the far side, Gene -who somehow caught up to the convoy through his incredible speed alone- moved to intercept the Sand Shark. After empowering himself with the awesome radiance of the God Hand, he jumped to deliver a flying punch, but misjudged the distance and landed just in front of the incoming buggy after Michael shot its back tires out. Jak and Dakster saw fit to take advantage of the opportunity so neatly presented to them and ram Gene; the God Hand's invincibility, however, said otherwise. The Sand Shark crashed into Gene's punch head-on and lost in spectacular form, its entire front crunching up as its drivers sailed from their seats and bounced across the dusty ground. Gene, meanwhile, would likely be little more than knocked over. With the situation handily dealt with, Ratchet could jog over to his old acquaintances at his leisure, and greet them with his modified visage. Nearby, the efforts of Courier 6 and his trusty new friend Heracross spelled a messy end for one of the buggies from earlier. Its compatriot's pilot, not a lousy driver by any means, swerved out of the way to avoid getting crushed. 6 managed to retreat to the bowsermobile just in time to roll out of the way of the Brother Grimm.

Somehow, Din managed to time her mount's attack on the fast-moving ice cream truck just right and deliver a Horn Leech to its side without getting her Gogoat killed. Though a display of great bravery and talent, the assault's risk far outweighed its reward, as the pokemon's antlers did little but leave some unsightly dents in the wacky-colored war machine's side. After her, Donnie made his move from atop his flying disc. Making pace with Sweet Tooth, he unloaded on its clown driver's door, releasing Chi burst after Chi Burst to expose Needles to attack. By the time he got the door open, however, the clown's ally had fallen into the Centurion's clutches, and the buggies opposite him fared little better. Needles looked Donnie's way and growled in anger. He returned his attention forward just in time to see a tiny girl with a stylish cap jam a glowing umbrella into the ground. “...What?” he snarled. The next instant, a Power Geyser burst up beneath his right side wheels, causing Sweet Tooth to lean precariously and Needles' temper to boil over. The battle was scarcely underway, yet a trump card seemed necessary.

Needles slammed a big red button on the dashboard, and Sweet Tooth sprang upward. It began to come apart, reshaping and transforming in the span of a couple seconds until the deadly icecream truck had become a terrifying, bipedal killing machine: Sweet Bot. Mad laughter echoed from the mech's speakers as jets on its back propelled it higher into the air, and from its chaingun arm it let loose a swath of blanket fire that threatened to pulverize Donnie before sweeping over to Agoston to try and free Brother Grimm. However, the vulnerability the monk made remained: the absent driver's-side door left an opening on the left side of Sweet Bot's chest.

After firing her thrusters and catching Tora mid-air, Poppi watched the carnage unfold. From its lofty vantage point in the sky, Sweet Bot could rain destruction while avoiding all of their company's melee fighters and most of their ranged ones. Plus, poor Bowser Jr. was still skyborne. They needed a miracle. Luckily, the Nopon could provide. After taking in a deep breath, Tora said, “Poppi, it time for big action! Ignite Ether Furnace! Show real power!”

The Artificial Blade nodded, her eyebrows furrowed. “Roger that, Masterpon!” A golden glow took hold of her. Without ceremony she tossed Tora up, and a maelstrom of red ribbon and orange sparks surrounded her. A moment later, the cocoon of energy burst apart, and from it a blur burst forth. It snapped up Tora before he could fell, then wheeled around to snag Junior as he plummeted. When it finally came to a stop in the air, facing the Sweet Bot, the others could finally make out an altogether different Poppi, holding Tora with one hand and Junior with the other.

Tora, held by the straps of his overalls, held out his wings, and Poppi manifested her new armaments, the Mech Arms. “Time to carry out Poppi justice,” she advised, her voice a touch lower. Grinning, Tora opened up the Mech Arms to reveal a missile silo in each, and fired off a salvo of small homing missiles at the Sweet Bot. They struck it in quick succession, knocking it around a touch and throwing off its aim. Meanwhile, Brother Grimm's continued battle against Agoston's strength came to a sudden end: while a mad had limits, the machine had none. It broke free, its engine roaring like some bloodthirsty beast, just before a glowing bolt of plasma struck it. Energy washed across its surface, temporarily leaving it sitting duck. For a moment, the heroes had a clear opening on all fronts.

For her part, Princess Peach planned to use it. Armed with a powerful but short-range weapon, she could only labor to stay out of the line of fire during the heated battle, but with Brother Grimm knocked out she saw a chance to make it permanent. Steering her cart back around, she left Bowser's entourage and sped toward the monster truck. Peach scarcely slowed down as she blitz past one of its enormous tires, leveled her scattershot, and thundered out a point-blank blast into the thick rubber. While the tire didn't explode, air surged eagerly from the blast site, and the princess sped away victorious.